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Rose's Journal


rosestar737

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Hello my name is Rose. I don't even know were to start with introducing myself so I guess I'll just explain my experience with what seems to be a tulpa and what I'm going to use this thread for. My friend introduced me to the idea of a tulpa a while back and I did a lot of research, mostly on this forum, and even though I started to make a tulpa based of a mlp character named Vinyl Scratch (don't judge me) I was scared of the possible negative effects and postponed it to another time. Well in the past couple of days I've been snuggling my teddy bear (again don't judge me) and I gave the teddy bear traits almost like an imaginary friend. Earlier today the imaginary friend in my mind "woke up" (best way I could put it. The teddy had a very vague almost sleepy personality in my head.) and they became the underdeveloped Vinyl tulpa I was working on about a month ago that never became a fully fledged tulpa. The "thoughtform" or "tulpa to be" or perhaps an actually sentient tulpa had vague personality traits and a form similar to the Vinyl design except I could only "see" her outside my own vision. I had a long walk in the woods with her and we were talking most the way. I'm a bit scared but I don't want her to dissipate. I want to keep her and I hope that the people on this forum can give me advice to make this happy accident sentient, healthy, and developed.

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Guest Anonymous

heyo! welcome to the forums rose :) you seem to be doin just fine so i wouldn't worry. your tupper wont dissipate unless you purposely do it or if you stop interacting with it. i'm not gonna go into a lot of detail because i'm sure either Reisen, Amber, or Cinemaphobe will be here shortly with a 5 paragraph essay on everything you need to know (there very helpful and welcoming) so ill just leave the science stuff to them. until then just try not to worry. nothing can really go wrong, its in your head so your in control. unless you purposely do something wrong it'l be fine :) you can find some guides on this stuff in the guides section because they'd probably explain it a lot better than me X3

 

anyway don't worry and you'l be fine. good luck! seeya~

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Guest amber5885

1) no worries on the mlp tulpa, I don't have one but you're not alone.

 

2) I have a teddy bear on my lap right now, you're not alone.

 

3) it's EXTREAMLY difficult to get rid of a tulpa so don't worry, it has to be a concious effort for it to happen and like the above post mentioned it can really be done only through ignoring the tulpa and even then it is theorized that the tulpa does die it just goes dormant.

 

Odds are good that that is what happened as you describe this tulpa as "waking up."

 

Just enjoy your time with her, treat her with love and respect and set aside time for passive, active or some combination of both kinds of forcing each day and you will both be fine.

 

Have fun, enjoy your new friend and welcome to the boards.

If you have any questions use the search button to see if a discussion has already been started and if not feel free to start one. You can also sed along a PM If you like.

 

:) chow

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Thank you two for the help ^w^. You were really reassuring and nice. Though I have a question that I hope someone out there can answer. I think at this point I'm still to some extent parroting what Vinyl says and does. I don't think she has sentience yet and even if she does she is really underdeveloped and sometimes she goes a really long time without doing anything until I engage her. She almost feels like a dream. Almost there but not quite. Do you have any suggestions for tulpa forcing that'll developed her personality, get on the road to sentience, and make her more...there? I am not looking for an easy over night solution but any insight on my situation will help.

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Guest Anonymous

id like to start off by saying always assume sentience from the beginning. tuppers are sentient from the beginning and there was a guide somewhere (cant remember which one) in which a tulpa themselves even stated tuppers are vocal after the first couple hours. you just have to learn to hear them.

 

alrighty with the parroting. you probably arnt parroting unless you try to parrot. unless your like me and parroting is a habit. but even then i can still tell when i'm doing it. and if you are parroting without realizing it i'm sure your tupper will understand and wont get mad at you if you explain to them.

 

as far as your tulpa being silent a little, i'm pretty sure that happens to everyone at one point or another X3 remember they'r still young so there probably going to go through a couple periods of silence but don't worry about it. keep forcing, narrating, ect. because there still there. this happened to me and i was very worried to, but i kept with it and in a week at most she was active again. tuppers just need a break sometimes.

 

and for forcing suggestions,

 

personality: use paint. pick a diff color for each trait. and paint your tupper with the personality paint.. wrighting short stories. making your tupper the main character. having them act out traits in the story.. wrighting letters to your tulpa commending them on how [enter personality trait here] they are. for example if some of there traights are kind, and strong, then in the letter you might put: 'your so kind! i can already tell your gonna be big and strong when your fully developed'. or something like that. you get the point X3

 

visualization: draw them. this will help you get a clearer view of what they look like and you can use it as a reference during visualization. also you can get a feel for your tupper by just running your hands along there body and feeling there texture and were everything is. this is a really good one and helps me alot.

 

more thereness: i don't really know what to tell you on this one other than along with narrating to your tupper throughout the day, try to feel their presence. like have them follow you around n stuff.

 

also if your worried that your puppeting/ they cant hear you/ their not sentient/ect. then just ask them to surprise you. they most likely will. i asked sadie (my tupper) to surprise me like 3-4 times now whenever i'm having doubts and she has every time.

 

that's about all. sorry for the length of all this X3 but i hope you can find at least some helpful info in all that. keep up the good work! ~seeya!

 

ps: a lot of what your asking can be answered in the guides/tips and tricks sections so you might want to go check some of that out :) there's a lot of help full stuffs in there

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Interview her.

 

Google character worksheets for fiction writers and take whatever questions apply (so skip stuff like "Mother's maiden name" or whatever) and interview her.

 

Asking her questions will make it easier to differentiate between your voice and hers, because you'll know that you're the one asking the questions, and she's the one answering. It will also give her experience thinking and talking, and it will help you to get to know her better.

"Some things have to be believed to be seen." - Ralph Hodgson

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i'm not gonna go into a lot of detail because i'm sure either Reisen, Amber, or Cinemaphobe will be here shortly with a 5 paragraph essay on everything you need to know (there very helpful and welcoming) so ill just leave the science stuff to them.

 

anyway don't worry and you'l be fine. good luck! seeya~

 

 

I laughed when I read that Lillywolfy.

 

 

I wasn't going to say anything because Amber beat me to it, and so did Lillywolfy. But now I can respond with valuable information to your most recent post (as Lillywolfy initially predicted lol).

 

In agreement with what Amber said, you are far from alone when it comes to mlp tulpae. But welcome to the forum! As a fellow aspiring tulpamancer I'll be reading your PR to see if I can gain any knowledge from it, and to simply enjoy reading into your journey while offering advice when I judge that it should be given.

 

You seem to be worried that you are parroting. Conveniently, on this site there is a term for that: "parrotnoid"

 

I believe that the term was eventually coined by someone because of how common of an occurrence it is, and how much it hinders tulpae. This leads to the question; if you were a tulpa, and you were desperately trying to communicate to your host, how would you feel if your host believed that he/she was parroting? You would most likely feel sad, or even agitated, which might lead to you even giving up the whole communication thing entirely. As many people before me have said, parroting is a 100% conscious effort, so if you think that your tulpa spoke, and you know that you didn't will it to speak, then assume that your tulpa spoke. This will satisfy your tulpa, and make it feel like its communications are not only welcomed without skepticism, but received.

 

 

Now for sentience; believe that your tulpa is sentient from day 1. Of course in your case, day 1 is long gone, but you still have the opportunity to make today your day 1. Start believing that your tulpa is sentient, and your tulpa will become sentient. The tulpa-process itself is one that requires belief, and belief is a powerful mental force. I'm sure that if a psychologist denied you of possessing any sentience that you'd be extraordinarily pissed off. So imagine how your tulpa would feel if it actually was sentient and you assumed otherwise. Assuming sentience accelerates progress towards vocality, and makes narrating to your tulpa much easier, and I am speaking from experience. So please get into the habit of assuming sentience because absolutely no harm could come of it, and it benefits both you and your tulpa.

 

 

As for personality, you could either write the traits down, which I find extremely boring, or you could just roll the dice and see what your subconscious throws at you. Either way, you control the outcome. Always think of your tulpa, and believe that they are always with you, and your belief will make it so. Eventually you won't be able to forget your tulpa, and you'll always feel like he/she is always there.

 

 

Bottomline: Believe in your tulpa, overestimate their sentience, and know that parroting is a completely conscious effort, as puppetting is, and you'll do just fine :) Good luck! I'll be reading your PR hehehe

"Sanity is the playground of the unimaginative."

 

Yumi + Cinema

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Thank you all so much ^^. I am using a mix of different methods including a really great one that's a great method for imposition that makes a tulpa more "huggable". Vinyl really likes hugs so far and so do I. When she embraces me in a hug it's just so warm, inviting and lovin. So I guess the whole making her "there" thing is working out fine. Personality wise she's still vague but there's a personality there that I'm trying to develope to. She's outgoing, sociable, and assertive like the fancanon Vinyl Scratch.

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I'm having an interesting problems right now. Ok to add context to this I should mention that I'm transgender (to be more specific I'm a demigirl which I know sounds stupid but it fits who I am. I'm a girl but I still feel nonbinary.) and I prefer female or gender neutral pronouns. Rose is also my chosen name and my birth name is some really guyish name that makes me feel really uncomfortable. The thing is that I'm 15 and under some uber conservative parents who sent me to an all boys school and shoving me approximately 9 miles further into the closet. So needless to say people see me as male, use male pronouns, and call me by my birth name to the point were even I misgender myself. So it's not hard to find out why the tulpa, whom I still parrot to most the time, misgenders me and accidentally uses my birth name. Vinyl has gotten better to the point were she'd start to use my birth name and then immediately switch to Rose. I think she feels really bad about it but I assure her it's not her fault but the indoctrination of society telling us who gets what pronouns and assigning us gendered names. It's just an interesting issue that I thought I'd share. We'll both get better eventually with it.

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Guest amber5885

It will take time. Just like when you have a new freind they have to get to know you a bit before everything become natural.

 

Also I know how you feel. I identify as a gender neutral, asexual, homoromantic male in a female body. I understand confusing lmao.

 

I hope this becomes a safe place for you.

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