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SR's unnecessary insanity


SilverRevlis

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So, I'll try and keep things brief for the moment, due to the fact that I didn't sleep prior to writing this.

My name is SilverRevlis. It's not my real name, but fuck you.

I have had some previous experience working with the parapsychological, however I won't delve into that. I do not belive in magic, the metaphysical, or religion. I do however believe that there is more to the mind than we know at this current point in time. That is one of the reasons I started researching thoughtforms. I started looking into to tulpa's about two years ago, but misinformation bothered me, so I never went any further.

 

Now, several things about me. I play the guitar, the bass, and the ukelele, and I am looking to study piano and the viola, I have written various short stories, and am working on a novel, And I have studied psionics before, but had now proper ways of testing it, so I stopped.

 

So, I went back into tulpa research to get ideas for a short story, and stumbled onto this site.

I decided that now that there had been some semblance of proper research put into the subject, I would finally try to create one. Now, in my research into meditation, I created a wonderland of my own design, the 'dark room' as I call it, for the purpose of being able to retreat into my mind to block outside stimuli, all without having any knowledge of wonderland usage in the creation of tulpa's. Before I knew about wonderlands, I decided to name my tulpa 'Alice'. I kept the name afterwards as a nod the the novel. I'll go into her creation process later on, due to the fact that I need a shower and some coffee and would like to wrap this up. As of the day of my writing this, december the fifth, two thousand and twelve, Alice Veras is five days old, almost fully sentient, partially vocal, and asleep. She sleeps much more than me, though most people do. I will update later with the details of my time with her before this post, as well as writing any new details.

 

Until next time,

Revlis

Let's focus on the matter at hand, shall we?

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Alright, so to put it short, today sucked.

Now, I wasn't able to force today due to sheer exhaustion. Coffee didn't help, lighting a cigarette was damn near impossible, and I couldn't keep a thought in my head to save a life. Now, around three 'o clock in the afternoon, I decided to attempt to enter wonderland. The first thing I noticed is that my entrance to wonderland, the dark room, was changed drastically. Of course, my first thought was that Alice changed things, which upset me because I asked her not to alter it. I found Alice lying in bed, so I attempted to wake her up and told her to meet me in the forest below. I didn't see her face, but I noticed that her hair was a pitch raven black. I put it off to her deviating from her base for and didn't think of it until later.

 

Now, I get to to the forest, and Alice is sitting by a tree. I go up to her and ask if she wanted to play a game. She agrees, so I make us some weapons, explain the game to her, and fly into the sky to begin. I go into the sky and encase myself in a black sphere. Inside the black sphere is a sort of mental computer, which I use to create some basic robots for us to hunt down. I encase a small portion of wonderland in a barrier so as to keep everything in, and then I leave to start the game. I tracked down a few robots, checked Alice's position on the map, nothing unusual. However, after a while, I start having flashes through somebody else's eyes. Flashes of people being murdered in my wonderland. I go in search of the thing killing people, and I find something I had never expected to see. The first tulpa I had ever made, Rayhlah.

 

She had been the once altering my wonderland, she had been the one with the raven hair I had seen, and she had been killing everything she could. I did the only thing I could do to keep her suppressed for enough time to fix things. I grabbed her, and I tore her entire form piece from piece. Skeletal system, veins, organs, are torn to shreds. It wouldn't kill her, but it would leave her suppressed for a while. I ran to find Alice, and thankfully she was okay. I grabbed her and flew back to the dark room.

 

I dropped Alice off just underneath the dark room, because I had to do something she really wouldn't like. I entered the door I had made into my subconscious, where I found Rayhlah coming together. Here, I had the chance to end her life. It had been too long since I made her for me to allow her to live like she was for any longer. I take no pride in putting her through the pain I did, but I did what I felt was necessary. I grabbed her, I tore the essence from her body, and I crushed it into nothing. As a warning to you all, be very careful with your tulpa's. I made mine without any of the knowledge I have now, and they were all corrupted by fear and hatred. That's why I won't let them near Alice. She doesn't deserve that particular strand of disco fever.

 

I left the dark room and dropped the the fields below. Alice was being attacked by some of the creatures in wonderland, no doubt seeking revenge on the wrong person. Taking care of them was easy, but Alice wasn't breathing. I wouldn't let Alice lose her life for my past mistakes. I took everything I had, concentrated it, and send out a blast in all directions, effectively pulling the wonderland into itself. After that, I went back into the void. From there, I took the last little bit of strength I had left, and used it to enter my subconscious. Here, I used a method of mine that allowed me to repair the wonderland, heal Alice, and end Rayhlah. After that, I lost consciousness.

 

Six hours later I woke up. At the time of this writing, Alice and the wonderland are in perfect condition, though Alice is still shaken. I didn't write this to be seen as cool, or as a storyteller, I wrote this in the hopes that one of the people who comes here hoping to make a tulpa for the wrong reasons will see this and know just what happens when you're an idiot.

 

I need a cigarette.

SR

Let's focus on the matter at hand, shall we?

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That sounds like a fun game. I've been searching for a way to take care of Azazel my more violent impulses without invisioning ripping humans to shreds. if you don't mind my borrowing the idea.

 

That's too bad about your earlier Tulpae though. I had not thought they could turn so terribly. Was she really unhealable? No altering you could have done?

Please, refer to Azazel as my Muse. :)

 

Our story is here.

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From IRC

: Oh dear god what am I doing here.

: heh

: so many things i wish i could do to you in person

: since i cant physically touch you then let me describe them

: Your a man aren't you?

: i wish to rip out your trachea and drink your blood as if it were a wine

: then slit open your stomach and have your entrails spill onto the ground for the dogs

: i will rip your eyes out of their sockets and use them for golf

: Wow, won't even take me out to dinner first.

: i will tear off your skin and wear it as a coat

: Also, eyeballs would be extremely ineffective as golf ball.

: imagine all of that happening at once

: And skin wouldn't have much insulation.

: Eh, sounds like one of those nightmares that people have. Good thing I'm not normal.

: not normal? then let me shove you back into the darkest depths of your kind and let you live out those horrors forever

: and drown you in your own blood

: Sure.

: so only a small part of your consciousness is left, silently screaming

: Good. I think too much anyway.

: Can you imagine never being silent in your own head? Always analyzing? Always thinking? Oh wait, you wouldn't. Thats why they call it braindead.

: SHUT UP YOU ASSHOLE!

Let's focus on the matter at hand, shall we?

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Wow :) well, Azazel's never directed horror towards me. So Anna is one of your older Tulpae?

 

Well, I'm glad Alice and your Wonderland are alright if one like that was wandering your mind.

Please, refer to Azazel as my Muse. :)

 

Our story is here.

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Oh, no. That was from IRC. And I don't think she was un healable, but there was a small amount of doubt that I could heal her, and it was either kill her, or risk her killing Alice. I couldn't take that risk.

Let's focus on the matter at hand, shall we?

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The creation process: From writing to forcing

 

The first thing I did was form Alice's soul. This was simply an electric blue cloud of fog. I then started thinking of personality traits, likes, dislikes, etc. After that I added another lay to her soul. On this layer I made visible changes to her souls form, giving it streaks of different main traits, such as compassion, courage, loyalty, and wit. I then started to work on her body. The original for was a woman in her mid twenties, pale skin, emerald eyes, and blazing red hair going down to her chin at longest, bangs swept to the right side of her face. I visualized as much as I could for her, such as skeletal system, veins, ligaments, fluids, etc. I then worked on the textures of her hair, skin, nails, and all that jazz. Once That was complete, I put the body into a comatose state. I then worked on her soul some more, going over her traits, personality, and the like. Once that was done, I gave her part of my 'essence'. This is merely a symbolic thing, but I feel it has its merits. I then proceeded to plant her soul into her body. Once that was done, I breathed life into the currently frozen body, upon which all of her functions started to work at a normal rate. Heart rate, breath, all normal. I then stopped working for the night and let the body and soul meld as one. I'll continue this when I'm in the mood.

 

SR

Let's focus on the matter at hand, shall we?

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