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Visualization and sense of tulpa's presence are getting weaker day by day
#1
I am the very beginner as a tulpamancer, so I started forcing Caroline five days ago. At first, I had no problems with visualization, and I was forcing her almost 24/7 + in wonderland, but yesterday I could barely imagine her, sitting next to me, while passive forcing, or even in the wonderland. It's not the same as it was at the beginnig, it feels like my imagination just turned off. The things became even worse today: when I was talking to her, I felt like I was talking to the air and didn't feel or see Caroline at all. This thing really makes me frustrated.

It also became almost impossible to imagine her whole body, without concentrating on particular parts like hair, eyes, nose, hands, arms, legs, etc. Drawing her in Photoshop also didn't help me.

I would decide to take a break for few days and try forcing again and wouldn't ask here at all, but it's been only 5 days since the first forcing session, and I'm afraid that I'll have a huge drawback with my tulpa's progress because of such a break. Maybe should I do some exercises?
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#2
You just barely started, and since visualization is only known to get better with practice, you probably just had an "on" first day and off other days. Really gotta keep at it for a couple weeks at least to judge what your norm is and if it's getting better or worse.

As for losing progress - you literally just started. Tulpas aren't made in a week, so no progress you've made so far is the end of the world to "lose" in the first place, you can't get negative progress. With that said, "progress" isn't really lost easily in tulpamancy, because it's a very over-time process, with no immediate actions/events making massive differences nor short breaks causing too much regress. Long breaks can cause your progress (usually tulpa auditory or visual clarity) to regress to some extent, but nearly always it only takes the same work you did to get there for a day or so to get it mostly back, and if it helps keep you from getting burnt out that'll be far more productive in the long run.

You can take a break if you want, though I doubt visualization clarity will improve because of it, it could because it's "new" to you, I don't know. Sticking with it (for a lot longer than a week) is your best bet though.
Hi. I'm one of Luminesce's tulpas. Unlike the others, I don't think I stand out too much from him personality wise.
I'm just special because "I'm a tulpa". So I don't think I've much to offer, here. I'm happy enough to just be with him.
Ask us stuff - https://community.tulpa.info/thread-ask-lumi-s-tulpas
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#3
(04-15-2019, 03:29 PM)Flandre Wrote: You just barely started, and since visualization is only known to get better with practice, you probably just had an "on" first day and off other days. Really gotta keep at it for a couple weeks at least to judge what your norm is and if it's getting better or worse.

As for losing progress - you literally just started. Tulpas aren't made in a week, so no progress you've made so far is the end of the world to "lose" in the first place, you can't get negative progress. With that said, "progress" isn't really lost easily in tulpamancy, because it's a very over-time process, with no immediate actions/events making massive differences nor short breaks causing too much regress. Long breaks can cause your progress (usually tulpa auditory or visual clarity) to regress to some extent, but nearly always it only takes the same work you did to get there for a day or so to get it mostly back, and if it helps keep you from getting burnt out that'll be far more productive in the long run.

You can take a break if you want, though I doubt visualization clarity will improve because of it, it could because it's "new" to you, I don't know. Sticking with it (for a lot longer than a week) is your best bet though.

Thank you for your reply! Will wait for some longer. However, if a break won't turn my imagination on, what can I do to bring it back?

Yeah, I understand that I just started, but it's so exciting to see and feel her, and so frustrating to see any kind of regress. I just don't know what is considered as OK, and what's not, and how to overcome obstacles.
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#4
As I said, generally visualization should just get better with practice. You may have on days and off days, maybe even an entire week (sounds like a lot now, really isn't long-term), but overall more practice should mean more clarity. If it was specifically better on your first day, it's probably just because it felt new and novel to you, maybe. Practice will eventually get you to that point consistently for sure, though.
Hi. I'm one of Luminesce's tulpas. Unlike the others, I don't think I stand out too much from him personality wise.
I'm just special because "I'm a tulpa". So I don't think I've much to offer, here. I'm happy enough to just be with him.
Ask us stuff - https://community.tulpa.info/thread-ask-lumi-s-tulpas
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#5
Sometimes a migraine will mess with my visualization and vocality. Migraines can be utterly painless too, they usually come on after stress and end when stress has dissipated.

I noticed something odd, when my tulpas first came to me, that day they were perfectly easy to see and no problem (other than Ashley who wasn't strongly based on the look of her original character). After some time i literally couldn't picture their faces at all. I could easily picture known people and characters (they came from characters so that's who I saw on day one) it took literally months before i was able to get a clear picture of their faces/bodies after that.

I took this to mean that they rejected their original forms and reformed them from scratch. So i would recommend just making everything simple, start off with simple and let her build the avatar she wants, how she wants to be seen by you. I was pleasantly surprised how beautiful they ended up as compared to their original characters.

This is just our experience.
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#6
im not sure if its relevant but my imagination/visualization really hits the bottom when im on caffeine
it kinda becomes very hard to focus on imaginary world (in my case atleast)

i usually daydream in afternoons, so taking caffeine pills only in the morning solved issue for me.
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#7
I thank you guys for the answers above.

Just updating that 10 days later the things haven't become worse or better, so I still see Caroline way worse than I did at the beginning. I believe I should do some exercises for improving visualization.
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#8
If your visualization keeps blacking out on you, it's because you need more practice visualizing Caroline. I had the same problem when I first started out, and it took a while before I started making progress.

A few suggestions-
  • Practice open eyed visualization a lot. Even if it feels like a "ghost" of Caroline is there and not a solid form, then that's still good progress. Keep working on it and eventually her form will stabilize. Ranger, my Tulpa, will sometimes shrink down to talk to me, ride my shoulders, walk beside me, or play with whatever is around us.
  • Stress may make your visualization quality tank. If you feel stressed out, don't panic if your quality is low.
  • Try a different resolution or art style. Cartoon drawings may be easier to visualize than a realistic looking model. It's also fun to experiment with rendering everything in crayon, changing the color of the light, etc.
  • Sometimes giving yourself an excuse to have better visualization ability sometimes will lead to better visualization ability. Lighting a candle or "adjusting the mind cam" (breaks 4th wall) can be helpful in some circumstances.
  • If you can easily visualize movie scenes or video game simulations that are stuck in your head, then don't feel discouraged if you can't visualize her too. Go ahead and let your mind dwell on these visualizations and then try to visualize Caroline.
My Wonderland form minus the glasses and the fur. I'm not a hippo, I promise.
Ranger now speaks in
light blue text, but he used to speak in blue or orange text. He loves to chat.

The Grays, my other Tulpas, have their own account now.
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#9
Hey, I am in a 'flat' place too. and I sympathize with you. After the initial excitement and feelings of intense love, the absence feels like a loss. I am about a week into Flora and Nsonowa  absences, and am proceeding in spite of my feelings. I am trusting those who have encouraged me to continue. Good luck. Dr. Bob
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#10
(04-25-2019, 01:37 PM)Cat_ShadowGriffin Wrote: If your visualization keeps blacking out on you, it's because you need more practice visualizing Caroline. I had the same problem when I first started out, and it took a while before I started making progress.

A few suggestions-
  • Practice open eyed visualization a lot. Even if it feels like a "ghost" of Caroline is there and not a solid form, then that's still good progress. Keep working on it and eventually her form will stabilize. Ranger, my Tulpa, will sometimes shrink down to talk to me, ride my shoulders, walk beside me, or play with whatever is around us.
  • Stress may make your visualization quality tank. If you feel stressed out, don't panic if your quality is low.
  • Try a different resolution or art style. Cartoon drawings may be easier to visualize than a realistic looking model. It's also fun to experiment with rendering everything in crayon, changing the color of the light, etc.
  • Sometimes giving yourself an excuse to have better visualization ability sometimes will lead to better visualization ability. Lighting a candle or "adjusting the mind cam" (breaks 4th wall) can be helpful in some circumstances.
  • If you can easily visualize movie scenes or video game simulations that are stuck in your head, then don't feel discouraged if you can't visualize her too. Go ahead and let your mind dwell on these visualizations and then try to visualize Caroline.

Thank you, will try it out!
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