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Stupid Jokes Thread


Guest Anonymous

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Why did the grocery store decline the seller's diamond?

 

It didn't have enough carrots.

 

I'm not going to listen to you guys since you are all probably just talking to yourself and don't really have a tulpa like me.

 

 

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Guest Anonymous

Why do we leave cookies and milk out for Santa Claus?

 

Can't hurt to try some last minute butt kissing.

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Breaking news! Over 78% of the world's population of adolescents and young adults have suddenly died in their homes! Eye witness Clara, a mother of one of the victims, has a few words.

 

"My son, he, he was just studying in his room when I came up a few hours later and there he was, dead!" *sobs*

 

Studying.

Studying.

 

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 

I'm not going to listen to you guys since you are all probably just talking to yourself and don't really have a tulpa like me.

 

 

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Why does a milking stool have only 3 legs?

Because the cow has the utter.

 

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Host: Reece

Tulpa: Milana

"Avoidance of responsibility is self-imposed." - ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

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Why can't 6 date 7?

 

Because 7 is a registered 6 offender.

 

OOOOOOOR Because the couple just doesn't add up.

 

Steth: Adding onto that; Why is six afraid of seven?

Because seven ATE nine~!

*Ba-dum-tish*.

 

Troy: Fuck you.

 

Eury: What kind of bagel can fly?

A PLAIN bagel!

 

Troy: You are not the epitome of "funny".

 

Steth: *Insert trollface here.*

A queer soulbonding system with tulpamantic influences.

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Guest Anonymous

A Russian couple was walking down the street in St. Petersburg the other night, when the man felt a drop hit his nose.

 

“I think it's raining,” he said to his wife. ” No, that felt more like snow to me, ” she replied. “No, I'm sure it was just rain, he said. “Well, as these things go, they were about to have a major argument about whether it was raining or snowing. Just then they saw a minor communist party official walking toward them. ” Let's not fight about it, ” the man said, “let's ask Comrade Rudolph whether it's officially raining or snowing. ” As the official approached, the man said, “Tell us, Comrade Rudolph, is it officially raining or snowing?”

 

“It's raining, of course, ” he answered and walked on. But the woman insisted: “I know that felt like snow!” To which the man quietly replied: “Rudolph the Red knows rain, dear!”

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“Rudolph the Red knows rain, dear!”

 

YOU ARE A SAINT.

 

But you know who else is a Saint? Patrick.

 

I'm not going to listen to you guys since you are all probably just talking to yourself and don't really have a tulpa like me.

 

 

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Guest Anonymous

Five Innocent Words with Dirty Origins Video. Just fer you guys, at Christmas time:

Hee hee

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