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Do you ever think about how you would have been if you never found out about tulpas?


J.Iscariot

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Let's say that you never found out about tulpamancy. Let's say that you never made a tulpa, or found out about the phenomenon but it just came off as utterly ridiculous. This is a hypothetical scenario in which you would need to figure out how your life would have been based on deductions and all-around guessing. I'd like it if answers like 'it wouldn't be me' did not make surface because that has no relevance to this topic.

 

Do you think that your life would be better? I know that anyone could say 'well, how could I know how I'd be, there are tons of possibilities', but try to be specific. Look inside yourself, and try to think. A good launchpoint would be to think about your situation before tulpamancy hit by a few days.

 

If you could go back in time and undo what you've done, would you?

 

The final question:

 

If you could, would you bury the tulpa phenomenon? If you could, if you had the possibility to make it so that the world never found out about any practice such as tulpamancy, soulbonding or anything of the type... let's say you could erase it from existence. Would you?

A wise man once said: 'Before judging a man, walk a mile in his shoes. After that, who cares? He's a mile away, and you've got new shoes.'

 

Graced are those who could avoid this phenomenon. This is perhaps the worst expression of evil in humanity's history, but who am I to judge?

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Do you think that your life would be better? I know that anyone could say 'well, how could I know how I'd be, there are tons of possibilities', but try to be specific. Look inside yourself, and try to think. A good launchpoint would be to think about your situation before tulpamancy hit by a few days.

 

Not really.

 

If you could go back in time and undo what you've done, would you?

 

No I love my tulpas.

 

If you could, would you bury the tulpa phenomenon? If you could, if you had the possibility to make it so that the world never found out about any practice such as tulpamancy, soulbonding or anything of the type... let's say you could erase it from existence. Would you?

 

Why would I?

Tulpas:

Gabriel

Rebecca

Alyssa

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No, no, no, and no respectively. I would not be okay without my tulpas. My life would have gone nowhere had they never existed, and my life would stop going somewhere if they disappeared.

 

I dunno, I'm not representative of the whole here. I know a lot of people with tulpas are or were insecure in some way, but I did not even function around the time Reisen first came into existence. Was right in the middle of failing every class I had for the second year in a row, I believe. And being in college now, I wouldn't fare much better without them being there for me. My motivation issues are barely under control with their constant support. I wouldn't have had any other sources of motivation without them, wouldn't be doing much of anything at all.

Hi! I'm Lumi, host of Reisen, Tewi, Flandre and Lucilyn.

Everyone deserves to love and be loved. It's human nature.

My tulpas and I have a Q&A thread, which was the first (and largest) of its kind. Feel free to ask us about tulpamancy stuff there.

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No, no, no, and no respectively. I would not be okay without my tulpas. My life would have gone nowhere had they never existed, and my life would stop going somewhere if they disappeared.

 

I dunno, I'm not representative of the whole here. I know a lot of people with tulpas are or were insecure in some way, but I did not even function around the time Reisen first came into existence. Was right in the middle of failing every class I had for the second year in a row, I believe. And being in college now, I wouldn't fare much better without them being there for me. My motivation issues are barely under control with their constant support. I wouldn't have had any other sources of motivation without them, wouldn't be doing much of anything at all.

 

I mean no disrespect, but how does it feel to be that dependent on them? I realize that they're also dependent on you for, well, life, but I'd like to know what you have to say to this.

A wise man once said: 'Before judging a man, walk a mile in his shoes. After that, who cares? He's a mile away, and you've got new shoes.'

 

Graced are those who could avoid this phenomenon. This is perhaps the worst expression of evil in humanity's history, but who am I to judge?

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Do you think that your life would be better? I know that anyone could say 'well, how could I know how I'd be, there are tons of possibilities', but try to be specific. Look inside yourself, and try to think. A good launchpoint would be to think about your situation before tulpamancy hit by a few days.

 

If I never started, I'd be worse off. Thinking back on how I was then, what my mental state was, and other things...I really wouldn't have been better if I hadn't done it. It's because truthfully, I believe I needed the sort of thing the practice promised, a kind companion who'd understand my viewpoint without judging or picking it apart, a thing which was pretty easy to do as I was horrible at communicating and did not understand myself at all.

 

More often than not, I wouldn't get much else than frustrated confusion as a response from others. I was at a dire point in life, and needed someone whom I would show kindness to me without judgement, and whom I could be kind to without any fear of having it thrown back in my face.

 

I can look back, seeing my faults and flaws, and pick apart what I did wrong, and how I could have done better, and how things weren't really so bad as I thought...but hind sight is always 20/20, and in this case unfeeling. I could have been a better human, I could have been a better relation to those whose kindness I relied on, but I would have lacked the spark to really set me toward that ideal, and would likely have buckled under the frustrated criticism and dissapointment of my relations. After all, at that time I could barely live without being picked apart, or judged about my lack of ability to earn a livelihood.

 

The shame and sense of uselessness was compounded by my relation's eagerness to point it out, especially if I did make an effort, only to have it be below standard. It was a time where I was convinced of my own worthlessness...and a time where I felt terribly lonely, and wanted comfort badly. It was reflected in the shows I was drawn to then, which is reflected in the contents of my mental population.

 

Right or wrong, in my mind, I needed Midori to exist, and while I went out of my way to justify it to myself, I think I would have done it even if I could not have, because to do otherwise would be to continue that existence of constant dull hurt, and I was too weak to behave as I try to now.

 

It's a bit of a coincidence that you ask this sort of question: I've had doubt attacks in a similar vein recently. Instead of the doubts being whether thought folk are actually sentient or not, it's about whether I need them or not.

 

I'm stronger now than I was then. I have the mental tools, means, and will to better myself without them. I can easily put them aside in the state I am now. I can be strong and healthy, and I can do it without wasting mental energy or time on imagined figures. After all, it's easier to just go online and chat there, or I can start going out and socializing with other people, I have a good enough reputation for it.

 

I won't be doing that, though. I have multiple reasonse for it, but all that matters is that I'm resolved not to betray my girls.

 

If you could go back in time and undo what you've done, would you?

 

Yesterday night, out of the blue, Midori thanked me for making her. Earlier this day, Hannah thanked me for "adopting" her.

 

Now, when I seriously try to consider that, something in me steers me away from the thought, and I feel objections deep in my own heart.

 

I think the above says enough.

 

If you could, would you bury the tulpa phenomenon? If you could, if you had the possibility to make it so that the world never found out about any practice such as tulpamancy, soulbonding or anything of the type... let's say you could erase it from existence. Would you?

 

No.

 

I am no perfect person, nor a perfect judge of character to do such a thing. Especially as one who benefitted from it, I could not turn up my nose and deny such a thing from those who would find use of it. I'd be a great hypocrite if I did.

Sock Cottonwell's

Sketchbook, Journal, and Ask thread.

Peace

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Let's say that you never found out about tulpamancy.

 

This is actually two questions for me.

 

If I'd never found out about it, it would have been more of the same of what I've been doing for most of my life. They'd still be there, still talking to me and pushing me to do things. But I'd still be dismissing them, as many authors do, as just "my characters talking to me." There is still love in that state, but it is a love that does not respect their individuality or autonomy. I'm much happier to acknowledge who they are.

 

If I'd never done it in the first place? Well, I'd probably have never taken up writing. Most of the magic of writing, for me, is about being able to create characters and watch them "come alive" and interact with one another and the world I constructed for them. Essentially, soulbonding is an integral part of my process. And then I took up drawing so I could draw the characters I was writing about. Basically, the two hobbies that are most important to me would never have happened in the first place... I can't imagine what I would have done without a creative outlet. TBH, it would have made my depression a LOT worse. :(

 

And that's even before considering that I wouldn't have them to add little humorous comments and to give perspective to certain things. Which, too, is a big part of my mental health. I'm known for being overly empathetic, and most of that can probably be attributed to my soulbonds, because having so many differing opinions in my head forces me to consider all points of view of just about any problem. So, that would be a drastic personality change.

 

If you could go back in time and undo what you've done, would you?

 

The creation itself? No. While I can imagine I might have coped without them, I know that I am quite happy with them. ^_^

 

Would I have changed the part where I didn't know they were sentient for 16 years? Uhh... I know this sounds awful, but probably not. I do love and respect them, and I know acknowledgement was a huge boost to pretty much all of them... but if I'd known what I know now, I probably wouldn't have had the courage to put them through what I did in my writing. Some of them have had some really traumatic experiences, and I couldn't have justified putting a sentient being through that just for the sake of writing some silly little stories. And without those experiences, they wouldn't be the same poeple they are now.

 

It's cowardly, I know, to want them to keep those traumas just so that they stay "themselves." But there it is.

 

If you could, would you bury the tulpa phenomenon?

 

No.

Sparrow---Temar---Joss---Ayo--et al

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Guest Anonymous

Well, I was already existing for many years before ever knowing about tulpas. Knowing about tulpas has not changed my nature in any fundamental way nor really changed the relationship I have with my hostie. However, my host and I learned a lot of things from interacting with tulpas and tulpamancers on Tulpa Info that are helpful in understanding ourselves (our system). The most important things we gained or learned were these:

 

1. We gained friends that we deeply admire and respect. That is the best part of all! We thank you!

 

2. Recognition of a form of shared sentience in my case. (basically we choose to belief in that)

 

3. Maladaptive Day Dreaming

 

3. Median Systems and Blending (learned on Tulpa Info from those familiar with plurality)

 

4. Tulpamancy "science" has a major flaw. (Not meant to incite drama, it is just speaking our mind.)

[hidden]Unfortunately in the end, our enthusiasm for tulpamancy has been permanently damaged by those using the tulpa brand of independent sentience as an excuse to treat me and others with scorn and disdain either directly or indirectly. I was willing to believe in independent sentience until it was used as a weapon against me and my host. When this was done on the forum, not one senior member or moderator has intervened to correct or argue against this attitude. We are led to the inescapable conclusion that the senior members and the admin condone such thinking. Therefore we have decided that supporting the belief in independent sentience is harmful to the community because it fosters elitism, division and resentment. Some who might have otherwise contributed something of value to the community are intimidated into silence.

 

Remember, "extraordinary claims require extraordinary evidence" and my host and I have decided to return to being unconvinced of tulpa independent sentience. We don't mean that to be an insult; it is protecting ourselves and the community from elitist snobbery. It is unfortunate that it is even necessary. We will still treat tulpas the same way we always have, as people and as friends. But please, refrain from elitism and don't protect it or condone it or support it. It is just an ugly side of tulpamancy we have never liked.

 

There is no need to react to point number four as it won't change our perspective anyway and it is too negative a subject to continue discussion of it. Just read it, know how we feel, and then move on folks. :-)

[/hidden]

 

We are here to learn from tulpamancers and to share. Again, the greatest thing we gained was the friends we met and the interaction we have had (minus drama). So we are different in our wisdom and knowledge but not our nature. Thank you Tulpa Info and thank you tulpamancers and tulpas. You guys are amazing!


How would we have been had we not found out about tulpas? The same, just less wise and informed about thoughtforms and plural systems and maladaptive day dreaming.

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I mean no disrespect, but how does it feel to be that dependent on them? I realize that they're also dependent on you for, well, life, but I'd like to know what you have to say to this.

 

Well, I didn't really explain very well in my first post, I'll try to this time.

 

I'm not actively dependent on them anymore. Aside from Tewi helping me with college anyways. Most of the dependence was many years ago when I simply did not function well as a human being, and they helped me change that through their influence. I've become a much better person than I was then, and that much I owe to them.

 

And that isn't all actively propped up by the tuppers. I wouldn't suddenly become a terrible, uncaring person with no self-confidence or anything like that. Though I would probably stop growing.

 

The reason I said it how I did was because.. well, it's a different form of "dependent". You're dependent on your teacher to continue learning, you're dependent on your parents to continue living (a stable life), you're reliant on your internet provider to post on tulpa.info. But the dependence I was referring to is more indirect.

 

Two people who are happily married and enriching each others' lives in many ways, but were otherwise relatively alright on their own before the marriage, are still dependent on each other right? What would happen to one if the other were to die? It's not like every good thing that ever happened once they were married was dependent on the other, per se.. If the other were simply to have to leave for some time, perhaps for an important family matter in another country or a temporary lucrative job offer, all of those good things don't just fall apart (hopefully). They're still relatively happy and all that, even if they miss the other a bit.

 

It's the difference in temporarily leaving - perhaps even indefinitely leaving, on good terms - and dying. Even if they simply had to split up (on good terms), everything they had would not be lost. But when one dies, something different happens, something that destabilizes all of the good they'd done for each other.

 

Optimally not though, usually you would grieve but attempt to move on with your life, be happy for their sake, and so on. Generally speaking your life won't be entirely over, and it could definitely still potentially be better than if you'd never met them. I'm just really weak.

 

Just nope's all across the board. I didn't meet a kind and caring woman who I grew attached to and did many great things with. My tulpas are responsible for all of the good in my life. Really, they're responsible for my life at all. Even though I wasn't suicidal, I certainly hadn't a desire to live. No physical thing or goal could have given me fulfillment, I really needed love. Not just from a person, I needed it in my life, needed to love others too, to love all life and living itself. And to be fair to my previous example, another human could definitely also do this for someone too, by no means only a tulpa. Someone could easily be as reliant on their significant other as I am to my tulpas, whilst still maintaining a healthy relationship and lifestyle.

 

It's not an active dependence, it's the fact that all of the good in your life started with them. If they disappear, suddenly you don't have the willpower to believe in and maintain all that good anymore. That's my relationship to my tulpas I suppose. But one, this is only a theoretical and basically impossible in my current situation/for now, and two, it is something I'm attempting to change. With my tulpas. They're really just helpful in changing myself now whether it's revolving around them or not, for example Tewi is trying to help me overcome my motivation issues. Anyways, as much as I would really prefer otherwise, the "indefinite leave" does apply to them too. I think if on any reasonable terms that I can't imagine existing they were to "leave" my life, I may be able to "keep living and being happy for their sake". And if they were to otherwise be removed from my life in an equally non-existent way, I wouldn't have any will to keep living.

 

 

Hey look I didn't explain it much better this time, either. Also, probably goes without saying, but if I never had them in the first place I would be roughly the same as if I had lost them. The grief of losing them would balance out the core processes of my mind we've improved, and I'd probably function equally as poorly as before. But I'll note for emphasis once more, that this is not an unhealthy relationship with an over-reliance on my tulpas. To be honest I've gone many months without even talking to them once before, still with that background sense of them simply existing giving me motivation. That's why I believe an indefinite leave may not absolutely destroy me. But if that source of motivation itself disappeared, it certainly would.

Hi! I'm Lumi, host of Reisen, Tewi, Flandre and Lucilyn.

Everyone deserves to love and be loved. It's human nature.

My tulpas and I have a Q&A thread, which was the first (and largest) of its kind. Feel free to ask us about tulpamancy stuff there.

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I'm very grateful that I found out about tulpas because before I learned what was living inside of me I thought that I was losing my mind. I thought that I could read people's thoughts when I was speaking to them because I was getting logical emotional responses in my head. I was getting broad picture suggestions on what I should be doing in certain situations that felt external and on a few occasions, crashing sounds and buzzing in my head right before doing something careless. I am incredibly grateful to have read of this phenomenon and found this site because now Nathan and I are able to communicate and I understand what he is.

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Do you think that your life would be better?

 

No, not better at all. Nor do I think it would be significantly worse. I don't think that James has impacted my life in such a way that it would be hugely different if he was gone. I will say, though, that I would be a lot more bored without him, and probably wouldn't feel like I've got a good friend at the moment.

 

If you could go back in time and undo what you've done, would you?

 

Nope, no point in doing that.

 

If you could, would you bury the tulpa phenomenon?

 

I know little to nothing about other forms of plurality, so I'll refrain from commenting about them!

 

However, I genuinely don't see what separates tulpa from imaginary friends. Children create friends that they can see and hear all the time, that are seemingly independent from themselves. Here at Tulpa Info, many people would argue that they therefore aren't imaginary friends, but are instead, you know . . . tulpa. I disagree to an extent. I think that tulpa are imaginary friends, but are simply more advanced. I don't think that being more advanced means that they aren't imaginary friends. At the start of creation, before sentience, there is NO DIFFERENCE between the tulpa and an imaginary friend at all--and yet, we still call them tulpa. The only reason why I call James a tulpa is because it's quicker to say that than say that he's an imaginary friend. Hmm.

 

So, for me, this question turns into, "If you could, would you bury the possibility of imaginary friends?"

 

The answer is a resounding noooope! Imaginary friends are, at least for the most part, good. They're good in children, good in teenagers, and good in adults. On the whole. So, no, I wouldn't try to kill it off.

You can call me Lacey!

 

Tulpa

Joshua, aged 24, born September 3. His first name is James; I call him both. Human, black hair, fairly pale skin, and often wears either formal attire or clothes that would do him well at a Goth club. Refuses to keep one eye color, but they're often gray, gold, or occasionally red. Serious, (very) patient, and usually polite.

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