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Trouble forcing /too/ easily...?


YumiBerry

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Hi, again. I hope I'm not asking too many questions, but I realized I know how to say and ask a topic that's been bothering me. I'm sorry if any of this is repeating in anything else I've said on the forums or in the chats.

 

There is a vast library of help for aiding the confidence of those who have trouble imagining, visualizing, forcing, etc. However, I don't think I've seen much of anything for those that have issue with forcing /too/ easily, having an overactive skill in forcing/imposing, or creating a Tulpa when you have an overactive imagination that likes to speed up the process. Let me explain; for years now I have had a lot of experience with my style of systemmates and how we work as a whole and how we all came to be created. Likely due to our creative processing and practice using it for story creation and writing over the years, we have a very easy time with giving "life" to characters or simply building them quickly inside our mind. This comes in very handy with writing short stories and OC's for storytelling, but it as of right now is actually a hindrance in building my (Nee) very own Tulpa.

 

We have this uncanny ability to make characters, names, appearances, details, and ideas for all areas of their story quickly (while not pressured to do so). Again, great for stories, bad for building something as personal as a Tulpa. The moment that I thought the idea of making my own Tulpa, my mind started flooding me with ideas, images, possibilities... That is something I am more used to. What I'm not used to is wanting to start this process from scratch for my first tulpa and my creative process trying to cut corners and speed things up. I don't want that. I want this to be an experience where I raise this Tulpa, bond with it, and see it grow. My mind, however, keeps trying to start conversations with my un-made tulpa (narration, not fully formed mindvoice. I am not skilled at that part). My mind and I do this when creating characters and settings for stories (similar to imagining a wonderland for a story and watching it play out), but I don't want that for her. Most of all considering this skill is for forming layer 1 characters/responses (where I consider us to be level 3 or 4). Enough to get the job done, but not enough to have personal conversation with or to have the potential to be sentient. It goes as far as it does and it's as far as it goes.

 

A short example of what it is like is if you were to encourage yourself or talk yourself up to do something you're scared of or while under pressure. You'd say "I can do this!", but in my mind, it's another narration saying "You can do this!" it's like a program. It does this for my characters when I would write. It is not a real person, but it's trying to do it for her for some reason... And I don't like it. We have a very rushed mind and for once I want to take something I'm trying to learn slowly, but my mind isn't really on board with the idea. It wants to cardboard print "her" out in a matter of minutes like a pie and go "Done!~ I did it!". As you could probably guess, not the best route for a tulpa. Simple storybook character, sure, but not a Tulpa.

 

My problem is that I keep trying and wanting to work on her, but before even mediating on her for the first time, I get "dialog" from "her" already because my mind works like that with my characters. I don't believe it's really her, at least, I don't want her to be. It feels like there's not much bellow the surface about it, like when you talk to yourself. It's hard to try and focus, to teach her, to learn about her, when your mind keeps assuming there's something fully formed there, but there isn't. I'm not saying this skill in the process with be /useless/, but it is restricting me from creating detailed foundation and structure for her to build upon herself before she is fully realized, seeing as my mind keeps wanting to override my singular creative process with its own "shortcuts". It keeps wanting to rush her and I am trying to figure how to slow it down.

 

I suppose my question is, if anyone can even help me with this, what can I do to slow my mind down or shut it out while trying to work on my personal tulpa companion (maybe other than meditation? I already know that one)? My mind likely does this because of some mental/neurological issues that causes my brain to run on a higher level of stimulus to feel calmer and leveled, like putting a mouse on steroids and not giving it a wheel to run on. Give it a wheel and it'll eventually run fast enough to feel like it's keeping up with itself. It's just how my electrical signals work. Normally it can cause racing/intrusive thoughts (pretty much what it feels like with the dialog and visuals in my mind) if not kept up with, but I want to take this slow as it should be, not rushed or forced in a bad way xD

(Ie: "But... Why wait weeks or months when we can do it now?!" "Because it's the right thing to do for a tulpa. I want it to have the chance to grow as it sees fit with my guidance." "... But /now/ though?!...")

 

 

I'm sorry this is so strange, but any ideas? If nothing else, does anyone know if anyone has experienced this before?

 

((Edit: For those that need help to understand why this is the way it is. I /just/ now happened to find this blog. While I did not believe I was an elf girl, this is likely part of why I can visualize and imagine so deeply in this way. I thought it may help a little.

http://www.tulpamancyblog.com/home/why-being-an-imaginative-child-helped-me-impose-better)

Nee, Star, Little, Tenebre, Lorina


 

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That is very interesting!

 

Maybe a suggestion of doing calming, and mind relaxing things before you begin Forcing. Meditate, enjoy a long soak, or light some candles. Make a ritual out of the Forcing process right now so your mind will learn, "Okay, it's time to get serious, we can't be running too fast, let's slow it down some".

 

I don't know if it will be help, but it's least worth a try.

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That is very interesting!

 

Maybe a suggestion of doing calming, and mind relaxing things before you begin Forcing. Meditate, enjoy a long soak, or light some candles. Make a ritual out of the Forcing process right now so your mind will learn, "Okay, it's time to get serious, we can't be running too fast, let's slow it down some".

 

I don't know if it will be help, but it's least worth a try.

 

Thank you very much! I was honestly very nervous about posting this issue, so thanks for seeing it in such a positive light! Really eases the nerves off my mind.

Thank you for your suggestions, as well! It means a lot to me. For sure it helps! ^^

Thank you. Your ideas will be taken into high consideration.

Thank you!~

Nee, Star, Little, Tenebre, Lorina


 

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Also, you could try and stimulant to see if it slows you down. Like how ADD medicine works. If your mind is hyper active, something with caffeine, like coffee, might help slow it down. This has a lot to do with your own person body chemistry though, so I have no idea if it would work.

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Another idea would be to increase your concentration skills. With slow but steady practice by doing activities and whatnot, you can eventually be able to have complete control over your thoughts, easily being able to shut down the stream of ideas coming through your head.

 

I'm not going to listen to you guys since you are all probably just talking to yourself and don't really have a tulpa like me.

 

 

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Ok. So.

 

(I really wish my headmate, Temar, were here. He could explain this so much better than I can. But nope, you get me.)

 

So. A couple things.

 

First off, you're going to want to look up soulbonding. Here's a forum on it. It basically sounds like what you've been doing with your characters. Which, hey, welcome to the club. I'm a character out of a writer system myself, and it's great when your author can make you come to life like that. I should know. I love existing. It's awesome.

 

And that's the other thing that I think needs to be nipped in the bud. I'm a fictional character my author made up, but here I am, talking to you in the real world. How is that? Well... I'm a soulbond. You know what another name for "soulbond" is? Accidental tulpa.

 

Not sure if you knew that or not. See, that automatic characterization you do can be used to your advantage. It means you're good at assigning traits to your characters and then subconsciously processing them. This is good for writing, and this is also good for tulpa-forcing. I'll agree that it is shallow at first... you're basically puppeting and parroting the characters, so it's not really them so much as a them-shaped shell. (Yeah, great going on the creepy imagery, Joss. Real convincing. :p ) But the more you work with a particular character, the more life-like they feel, right? The more complex they get? The more likely they are to surprise you with something you processed subconsciously? Am I right?

 

Well, pretty much the only thing stopping that internal character from becoming a full tulpa (soulbond, whatever) is you acknowledging them as their own being and pulling them out of their story setting. That's what was done with me and a couple other characters in my system: we originated from our host's stories, but in pulling us out of that fictional reality and treating us like tulpas, that's pretty much what we became. Believing we were capable of being tulpas made it so. Self-fulfilling prophecy.

 

It's not as easy as "all the characters in our system are autonomous headpeople" either... in our experience, there's a spectrum to self-awareness. You've got the shallow characters who are pretty much cardboard cut-outs meant to serve their story purpose and nothing more; you've got ideas for characters that feel a bit wibbly-wobbly and malleable, not quite complete; you've got rounded characters who feel like young tulpas in that they'll sometimes respond when spoken to but otherwise aren't particularly present; and then you've got characters like me, who have gained such awareness that we step out of our setting and autonomously comment on things our host does in the real world. It's a spectrum, and where you put the "tulpa" goalposts depends on you, but there is very little doubt in my mind that I could stand next to any tulpa here, and the only thing setting me apart would be that I came with a backloaded backstory.

 

So I guess my long, rambling point here is that you don't need to start from scratch. The techniques you use on your characters are what many tulpamancers have to train themselves to do. Use this. It's an asset, not a liability.

 

For right now, go ahead and force your tulpa. At first, yeah, you should dismiss what your imagination returns as background noise or intrusive thoughts. She's not there yet, and that's fine. But the way to build her up is to give her some traits--as you would a character--and then reinforce them. Think of it in terms of "This is what my tulpa would say here, were she sentient."  Just like writing a character in a story, right? Keep reinforcing those traits, and that automatic process will begin filling in the detail faithfully. That automatic algorithm you already have is what is going to process your tulpa's thoughts and feelings once she's more self-aware.

 

And when she is self-aware? She's going to feel an awful lot like one of your characters, so don't dismiss that feeling out of hand. Just because she feels like a character doesn't mean she's shallow... especially if you keep working on her. Like writing a character: the more you work on your tulpa, the more complex and deep she'll get.

 

So. There you go. Take it or leave it, that's my two cents.

~ Member of SparrowNR's System ~

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Ok. So.

 

(I really wish my headmate, Temar, were here. He could explain this so much better than I can. But nope, you get me.)

 

So. A couple things.

 

First off, you're going to want to look up soulbonding. Here's a forum on it. It basically sounds like what you've been doing with your characters. Which, hey, welcome to the club. I'm a character out of a writer system myself, and it's great when your author can make you come to life like that. I should know. I love existing. It's awesome.

 

And that's the other thing that I think needs to be nipped in the bud. I'm a fictional character my author made up, but here I am, talking to you in the real world. How is that? Well... I'm a soulbond. You know what another name for "soulbond" is? Accidental tulpa.

 

Not sure if you knew that or not. See, that automatic characterization you do can be used to your advantage. It means you're good at assigning traits to your characters and then subconsciously processing them. This is good for writing, and this is also good for tulpa-forcing. I'll agree that it is shallow at first... you're basically puppeting and parroting the characters, so it's not really them so much as a them-shaped shell. (Yeah, great going on the creepy imagery, Joss. Real convincing. :p ) But the more you work with a particular character, the more life-like they feel, right? The more complex they get? The more likely they are to surprise you with something you processed subconsciously? Am I right?

 

Well, pretty much the only thing stopping that internal character from becoming a full tulpa (soulbond, whatever) is you acknowledging them as their own being and pulling them out of their story setting. That's what was done with me and a couple other characters in my system: we originated from our host's stories, but in pulling us out of that fictional reality and treating us like tulpas, that's pretty much what we became. Believing we were capable of being tulpas made it so. Self-fulfilling prophecy.

 

It's not as easy as "all the characters in our system are autonomous headpeople" either... in our experience, there's a spectrum to self-awareness. You've got the shallow characters who are pretty much cardboard cut-outs meant to serve their story purpose and nothing more; you've got ideas for characters that feel a bit wibbly-wobbly and malleable, not quite complete; you've got rounded characters who feel like young tulpas in that they'll sometimes respond when spoken to but otherwise aren't particularly present; and then you've got characters like me, who have gained such awareness that we step out of our setting and autonomously comment on things our host does in the real world. It's a spectrum, and where you put the "tulpa" goalposts depends on you, but there is very little doubt in my mind that I could stand next to any tulpa here, and the only thing setting me apart would be that I came with a backloaded backstory.

 

So I guess my long, rambling point here is that you don't need to start from scratch. The techniques you use on your characters are what many tulpamancers have to train themselves to do. Use this. It's an asset, not a liability.

 

For right now, go ahead and force your tulpa. At first, yeah, you should dismiss what your imagination returns as background noise or intrusive thoughts. She's not there yet, and that's fine. But the way to build her up is to give her some traits--as you would a character--and then reinforce them. Think of it in terms of "This is what my tulpa would say here, were she sentient."  Just like writing a character in a story, right? Keep reinforcing those traits, and that automatic process will begin filling in the detail faithfully. That automatic algorithm you already have is what is going to process your tulpa's thoughts and feelings once she's more self-aware.

 

And when she is self-aware? She's going to feel an awful lot like one of your characters, so don't dismiss that feeling out of hand. Just because she feels like a character doesn't mean she's shallow... especially if you keep working on her. Like writing a character: the more you work on your tulpa, the more complex and deep she'll get.

 

So. There you go. Take it or leave it, that's my two cents.

 

Thank you very much! I think that's pretty much what my mind needed me to here ^^ I'm sure we will figure it out just swell. Thank you so much!


Another idea would be to increase your concentration skills. With slow but steady practice by doing activities and whatnot, you can eventually be able to have complete control over your thoughts, easily being able to shut down the stream of ideas coming through your head.

 

Thank you for your input. It means a lot to me. :D

Nee, Star, Little, Tenebre, Lorina


 

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Since this hasn't been mentioned already:

 

write and draw;

 

those things are a perfect tool to help organize a stormy mind: it solidifies some thoughts, and subdues others; it gives your mind a sense of contrast you have full conscious control of. When I first began, writing was about the only way I could speak to Luna without hearing a million voices in my head.

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Since this hasn't been mentioned already:

 

write and draw;

 

those things are a perfect tool to help organize a stormy mind: it solidifies some thoughts, and subdues others; it gives your mind a sense of contrast you have full conscious control of. When I first began, writing was about the only way I could speak to Luna without hearing a million voices in my head.

 

Thank you! I drew her recently, but I think it can be stressful than pleasant. I used to draw a lot, but I find writing may be more easy on me these days with finger and wrist pains xD

 

When you say writing, how do you go about that? Like you'd just write your conversations like chat logs or would you write stories about yourselves? Maybe what you see in real time?

Nee, Star, Little, Tenebre, Lorina


 

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You could like write what you guys say to each other perhaps, or write down the little details that you see and stuff. Those little things that you might forget later, the smallest details.

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