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Wonderland Mental loop problem


Couguhl

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Hello. This is my first ever post, so please excuse any mistakes or whatnot that I make. Also it's a bit long so bear with me.

Anyways, on to the post.

I've been working on a tulpa (Whom I have named "Raine") and I have logged about four hours so far. (I'm on personality and I'm using TOG's method with umbrella traits except slightly modified. I'm also documenting each day.)

This is a bit off topic, but when we were forcing around the 2.5 - hour mark, the name Renee popped into my head. Normally I would have dismissed it, but I noticed it sounds incredibly similar to Raine, which is the name I chose for her initially. This made me really excited, and I have referred to her by Renee ever since. Would that be considered deviation?

 

Now onto the problem.

 

I have sort of a wonderland. It's a nice windy beach, and there are two chairs and a table where Renee and I force. Nearby there is sort of a shack/tall building where we house large buckets. Every time we work on a trait, I go into the shack and get one of the buckets and we visualize it filling slowly and it allows for deviation. (For a better description, see TOG's method.)

When I went into the shack while forcing last night, something unusual occurred. My mind kept visualizing my body floating upward into the ceiling right before the door, and I was stuck. I kept trying to visualize myself out of it, but even if I imagined myself walking out of the shed, I would 'teleport' back into the same spot.

It got incredibly frustrating, and I gave up. Today we were forcing, and the same thing occurred, but it wasn't as strong of a feeling and I got out of it.

 

Thinking about it now, whenever I would imagine something as a kid, that same thing would happen all the time. I would get stuck to one location and I couldn't mentally escape it. It was like a mental block.

I'm making this thread to ask why this occurs, and to see if any of you have experienced it. Thank you.

Tulpa: Sierra

Forcing since July 2012

Couguhl’s Progress Report

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Guest Anonymous

The first bit would be considered deviation I guess, but it was likely just your mind wandering.

 

I used to have an annoying mental block as well. In my imagination elastic strings were attached to everything, making actions like throwing and dropping things impossible. They would attach themselves to me and when cut would reappear immediately. It eventually went away on its own, but I have no idea why this sort of thing would happen.

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That used to persist in my imagination as well, except with gum or other sticky substances. I would try to imagine scissors cutting them, but they would just reappear.

 

It's just incredibly frustrating because it wrecks concentration and hinders any progress.

Tulpa: Sierra

Forcing since July 2012

Couguhl’s Progress Report

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Freud would like to have a word with you.

There isn't much you can do with this, but there are some tricks. Don't try to get out of it, because trying doesn't work. You have to know that you can get out of it. You could also just blow up the spot that you keep getting stuck in, and see if that helps.

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I'll try that, thanks.

 

(I have no idea who Freud is)

 

Freud is a guy who would have said that the reason you have this problem is because you feel confined in some area of your life, and it's lingering over you.

 

Anyway, the more frustrated you get the easier it's going to be to get stuck in that spot again. Keep calm and invade wonderland.

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That's extraordinary. After giving that some thought, I believe I understand what's going on.

And approaching the problem with frustration will aggravate the scenario. The reason I worked through it today, I believe, was because my mind was calm and clear.

 

Thank you.

Tulpa: Sierra

Forcing since July 2012

Couguhl’s Progress Report

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Freud is a guy who would have said that the reason you have this problem is because you feel confined in some area of your life, and it's lingering over you.

 

Anyway, the more frustrated you get the easier it's going to be to get stuck in that spot again. Keep calm and invade wonderland.

 

Now I'm curious; Whenever I imagine something to spin or rotate, I can't make it stop. I can make it spin the other way, but it's nigh impossible to just make it stay still. What would he say about that, if anything?

Tulpa:

Name: Elyse (Elly)

Birthday: 29th May, 2012

Physical description: 5"8 thin human girl. self-identified age 18. ~1ft, vivid red hair sometimes in a ponytail. light-skinned. green eyes.

Progress: entirely vocal, speaks often, but only 1 hallucination; her saying "Hiiii". Great at possession.

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Now I'm curious; Whenever I imagine something to spin or rotate, I can't make it stop. I can make it spin the other way, but it's nigh impossible to just make it stay still. What would he say about that, if anything?

 

Maybe that you are currently trying to cope with having little to no control over something that you would like to have full control over?

 

Spinning and sudden movemens are suually an indicator for a lack of control.... but there's a reason why I ultimately decided against studying psychology, so you might wanna wait for an expert.

 

Also:

Try typing "Viewmodel(self) noclip" into your developer's console! xD

 

...

 

Actually. I mean it.

Wouldn't be adding a developer's console into your wonderland be a conveniet way to trick your mind into or out of particular states? You'd just have to be enough of a geek for it to feel good. :P

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Now I'm curious; Whenever I imagine something to spin or rotate, I can't make it stop. I can make it spin the other way, but it's nigh impossible to just make it stay still. What would he say about that, if anything?

 

You feel like you are going nowhere, or you feel confused about something. Probably.

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