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Memories and dream staging


Guiomar

Question

I'd like to talk about two techniques we came up with (Lydia did most of the work) regarding memories. Both of them are used to help us share memories and/or feelings regarding specific subjects. Those are bundled memories and dream staging

 

Bundled memories

 

This method can help you share memories with your tulpa as sometimes (in my case at least) the way they are linked together can prove challenging for the tulpa to access by themselves. As tulpa001 said it's for people who use "episodic emotional triggers" to index their memories.

 

Method:

1. Calm your mind and think clearly about a subject. Let related subjects pop up. If you have ever made a mindmap it works the same way: you think about the required subject and then follow the links. Now take the first 5-10 memories that come to mind. For each of those visualize a specific image or feeling that is strongly linked with this memory.

 

2. Now, think about your tulpa and visualize yourself giving those memories to them so they can look for the links between those memories and try to look for the same links to other memories you didn't specifically think about.

 

Caveat

This method works quite well for us but there are some caveats:

1. You have to be completely open while doing it and be ready to give some follow up memories if your tulpa has trouble following certain links. This may be the case if they don't understand a subject.

2. Does not work if the tulpa wants access to memories you either want to keep to yourself or you don't want to think about. From her point of view it's like walking in a hallway and seeing a walled off doorway. You can see that there was a door there, you can pretty much tell the size of the room from the outside but you can't get in.

 

Personal experience

Here is some background: One morning while drinking coffee I asked Lydia if there was something in particular she wanted to ask me (I wanted to stimulate her a bit so it was "open ended question time"). She started asking questions about topics she clearly knew were making me a bit uncomfortable (eg times where I didn't behave according to my principles or topics I preferred not making her aware of). She then told me it was neither smart nor constructive to try to hide things like this because she could tap directly in my memories. She made her point using the well known "well if you're so good, try not thinking about that thing".

 

Conversation drifted (I preferred to talk about that, actually) toward how she saw my memories. She described a jumble of thoughts, feelings, skills and knowledge that was indexed in the weirdest way. For a quick example: most of what I know about physics wasn't easily accessible by looking neither for maths nor specific keywords such as "integrals" but rather by following the thread of feelings of gratitude toward a specific teacher. From what I understand, when I'm consciously responding to a specific stimulus it is easy for me to bring up the relevant memory. When she wants to access said memory it's much harder since she has to "skim" my conscious mind without disturbing it to find threads she can follow down to this specific memory. If it's about something I'm doing right now then it's easy and she can just "hook into it" but that's rarely the case.

 

She told me this made her work quite difficult and that she ended up spending a lot of time dredging through unrelated memories when she needed to know a little background about the way I felt about any subject.

 

 


 

Dream Staging

 

This technique uses a bit of self hypnosis. The idea behind it is that, as you fall asleep, you surrender control to your tulpa and let them induce  some kind of pseudo lucid dreaming. In this state you let your tulpa direct you. Since while dreaming it seems you have an easier access to thoughts and experiences you have chosen to suppress because they are painful or cause you cognitive dissonances. Those that are not forgotten but you avoid thinking about. You can do the heavy lifting while the tulpa directs the overall experience. If your tulpa wants access to specific feelings/memories you have  they can help you access them and interact with them (often as a dream metaphor).

 

Method:

If I'm feeling tense I use the same breathing technique I use to stay on top of adrenaline rushes in sports:

- breath in: 5 seconds

- hold: 5 seconds

- breath out: 5 seconds

- hold 5 seconds

 

Then:

- Try silencing intruding thoughts and focus on the tulpa (we usually talk and I focus on that)

- Make your own inner voice more and more quiet, focus on observing the tulpa.

- Slowly start "retracting" your perception from your whole body towards a specific point in your brain stem let your tulpa know that everything out of the realm of your perception is their's to control, let them acknowledge it.

 

- As the tulpa "takes the driver's seat" try not interrupting their thought process. Keep observing and let them act as they see fit, calm your mind and open yourself. Expose your thought process to your tulpa.

 

- if you start feeling lethargic, let yourself go but keep listening to your tulpa. The goal here is for you to stay between complete sleep and consciousness. The tulpa's job on the other hand is to direct you into remembering those feelings and memories that you are suppressing.

 

-if you feel like going completely to sleep it's OK, as long as the tulpa stays awake and can communicate with you.

 

 

Caveat:

It usually stops working during nightmares and/or violent dreams (think wake up screaming or punching the wall) she tells me it takes some practice on the tulpa's part to prevent the "main dreamer" from just going off the rails. If whatever's been brought to the front is too much to handle it's better to let go and focus on something else.

NB. I haven't had one of those since we started doing that but she tells me there were times when it was touch and go for a while.

 

It isn't always fun.

 

Personal experience

 

While using this method Lydia tells me I give her a better access to my thought process, especially the part I keep hidden from myself. While she is doing it it seems I'm more open to suggestion and can do the heavy lifting of bringing repressed feelings and such to the surface to interact with them (with or without her assistance, sometimes she participate others she just watches).

 

Lydia, once again (feels like she is doing all the work) came to me with another suggestion: meditate before going to sleep. To be more specific, as I go to sleep, surrender control to her. I wasn't that into it at first (first thought that I couldn't silence was "what if she messes up with my head?" to which she answered "I'm already in there and believe me there isn't much I could do to make it worse") but we gave it a try and it was quite interesting.

 

Basically what happened is that she would either set up quite a complex dreamscape (or hook into one I made to modify it, I'm not sure) and then use that to interact with me. She would alternate "thinking" phases where I interact with "hard" topics and "relaxing" phases where it's almost plain dreaming. The first two or three times she dedicated more time to the "hard" phases and while it was useful it wasn't very pleasant. I almost decided to quit doing it but I kept faith in her.

 

To me it felt like completely surrendering control. During the most lucid moments of the "dream" it feels a bit like being an actor directed by someone else (depending on how subtle the suggestion is). I wouldn't attempt it if you have trust issues you need to work through.

 

Sometimes during the dream I would look at someone and know it was her even if it looks nothing like her (she then quickly disappears or distract me from that particular fact about the character she is playing), other times not so much. In the morning just as a wake up she gives me a little "credit roll" where she tells me who she "played" during the night. Usually it's multiple characters that just "pass through" (she tells me it's hard for her to hold multiple conversations at once and still make it believable for me and if she stays with one character for too long then I start giving her too much attention and it becomes increasingly hard to stay inconspicuous) It's quite interesting and also give us a good conversation topic during breakfast.

 

From her point of view

It's like going through a dusty and unkempt library to look for a specific book and do house cleaning at the same time.

 

 

Conclusion

We hope this will give you some ideas, I'm not sure it's "real" forcing since the dream part I'm (mostly) passive.

 

If you are conscious enough during a dream it's great fun to try to "spot the tulpa". What seemed to work in the beginning was to look at the eyes, she looked more real than everything else and most important she looked like the only person in there with a purpose I couldn't discern. Also if as soon as you really start looking closely at a dream character they quickly makes a hasty exit then you probably spotted the right one.

 

 Lydia also uses some tricks such as jumping between characters quickly depending on the context so they do not get spotted. Cassandra hasn't mastered such tricks so she usually stays in the background.

 

All in all it helps find conversation topics. During the little "credit roll" I usually tell her how I felt about each character she played (along the lines of "Did or didn't like it, you were overacting, reminded me of [...]") and give her a little performance rating. I almost always miss some of her appearances, even if in hindsight I can identify most of them. Then during breakfast if there was a topic that I felt strongly about we hash it out so I can put my finger on what was disturbing/stirring and why.

 

Thank you for reading.

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Either "subconscious" isn't actually a word, or it's a word that refers to non-conscious parts of your mind. Things you aren't actively aware of, but that still exist. Don't treat "the subconscious" like an entity, especially not one that's considered separate/independent from the rest of the mind. That is unscientific. "Subconscious" applies to things like habits and things that make you feel a certain way without your conscious acknowledgement, like the feeling in an environment or, you know, all that social micro-weirdness. Those can be conscious too, though.

 

That's what subconscious means in its most accepted sense. "Thought" that isn't made known to you. The things you do "automatically". There's nothing wrong with using the word like that, except possibly the inability to do so without being tempted to use it in the less-accepted senses that Sands hates so much. I guess I could see that. "Your subconscious" is a risky term. At the very least, because you probably can't actually be sure of what you're saying. "Your subconscious mind will learn -" could be seen as unscientific, here. Perhaps stick to phrasing like "You'll learn to ____ automatically without even thinking about it over time" and such. Partly to appease Sands, and partly because he probably has a point we're not 100% getting.

 

Assuming that's what his last post was referring to anyways. If not.. Go about your business.

Hi, I'm Tewi, one of Luminesce's tulpas. I often switch to take care of things for the others.

All I want is a simple, peaceful life. With my family.

Our Ask thread: https://community.tulpa.info/thread-ask-lumi-s-tulpas

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I think I replaced all occurences with detailed explanations about what I meant. Even if I slightly disagree with the policy to "shoot on sight if he writes this word" I completely agree with the need for clarity so all in all... Not using it looks like the right choice.

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