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Iridescent Phantasmagoria


psychologicalKitty-Cat

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@psychologicalKitty-Cat

 

Did you happen to read THE DUNWICH HORROR? Or was it the non-Euclidean geometry of Ry'leh? Do you think the oppressive qualities brought to you by these tales were another part of Verdict's mischievous unconscious manifesting in the Flipside, or do you feel it was something different? I too like Howard Philip Lovecraft (I often employ similar cosmic terrors in my own stories) and I wonder if he was either so good an author or so jarring a visionary that his work changes people, enslaves their curiosity in a way (if the expansion of the Cthulhu mythos is any indication).

 

The idea of Verdict brandishing her own special Verdict-themed sword is cool as Hell and funny. My tulpa wishes she and Verdict could play together somehow. She thinks the two of them would bond over pranks like blowing up a small microwave in a busy cafeteria with disused cans of swollen foodstuff.

I've seen good people bleed

And I thought I'd seen it all

But my own two eyes would prove me wrong that day.

 

There are things that I've done

Only seen by the sun

And those things will be buried in my grave.

 

 

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@psychologicalKitty-Cat

 

Did you happen to read THE DUNWICH HORROR? Or was it the non-Euclidean geometry of Ry'leh? Do you think the oppressive qualities brought to you by these tales were another part of Verdict's mischievous unconscious manifesting in the Flipside, or do you feel it was something different? I too like Howard Philip Lovecraft (I often employ similar cosmic terrors in my own stories) and I wonder if he was either so good an author or so jarring a visionary that his work changes people, enslaves their curiosity in a way (if the expansion of the Cthulhu mythos is any indication).

 

The idea of Verdict brandishing her own special Verdict-themed sword is cool as Hell and funny. My tulpa wishes she and Verdict could play together somehow. She thinks the two of them would bond over pranks like blowing up a small microwave in a busy cafeteria with disused cans of swollen foodstuff.

 

The story that seemed to cause the changes was "At the Mountains of Madness." (I did read "The Dunwich Horror, " very good) I honestly think that the changes were something other than Verdict, as she denies anything to do with it. Also, the idea of our tulpas playing together sounds fun, but kinda dangerous. Verdict would also enjoy that.

 

Okay, lil bit 'o progress to report. Earlier in the day, I decided that the idea of imposing from behind was a fantastic one. So I went for a walk, and envisioned Verdict walking behind me, as you do. Feeling her presence is already a constant thing, because as soon as I finished personality forcing, I decided it would be a good idea to have Verdict provide moderate head pressure whenever she was around. So, presence is simple (what's funny is that when I wake up, it takes her a little while to get on her feet. There will be a faint, almost non-existent feeling of pressure. This is when she is asleep. So, whenever I'm concentrating really hard on something different, like a test, for example, I can feel her fall asleep. Then I will call up her form in my head, and see that she is in fact asleep. This usually tends to guilt me into paying more attention to her, so I wait until I'm done doing whatever it was I was doing, and prod her awake). After walking for a little bit, I felt my left hand become inexplicably warm. So, when I reached my destination, I asked her if she was holding my hand. She was. So that was cute, and it also served as a reminder as to how good she's getting at touch imposition.

I also keep forgetting that she is what we could call a loli.

In other news, she has changed her hair to whatever this is, so I'll include another bebinator photo. I have also neglected to mention that she has sky blue eyes. But not the darker "top" of the sky, like the "rims" on a cloudless day. If that makes sense. Once again, don't forget to add a tail. Wish bebinator had tails.

Screenshot_2018-05-23-21-11-20_kindlephoto-1001769597.png.2ab9edede5ac0ff3abeeb2604717fd57.png

mew.

~~~~~~~

Tulpas (and what color they speak in):

Verdict

Daiyousei

 

 

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  • 2 weeks later...

@psychologicalKitty-Cat

 

AT THE MOUNTAINS OF MADNESS is cool too. I've never read it within its entirety yet I do like the idea of reality-warping ancient creatures who can make a grown man mad with overwhelming fear and mental invasion. It's not too openly publicised, yet there's a follow-up to the story where the adventurer who went insane upon discovering the abode of the old ones was eventually cured by another of Lovecraft's characters, specifically by reverse-engineering the chemistry of entheogenic substances like peyote flower.

 

Aren't lolitas cute? Maybe next time you can ask her if she wants to ride on your back or sit down on your lap so you both can enjoy a book or movie.

 

If Bebinator won't include tails, why not draw one in Paint or use photographic manipulation software to add a tail to her rendered form? Have you considered drawing her form and equipment in a notebook or upon a tablet peripheral for your machine?

I've seen good people bleed

And I thought I'd seen it all

But my own two eyes would prove me wrong that day.

 

There are things that I've done

Only seen by the sun

And those things will be buried in my grave.

 

 

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@psychologicalKitty-Cat

 

AT THE MOUNTAINS OF MADNESS is cool too. I've never read it within its entirety yet I do like the idea of reality-warping ancient creatures who can make a grown man mad with overwhelming fear and mental invasion. It's not too openly publicised, yet there's a follow-up to the story where the adventurer who went insane upon discovering the abode of the old ones was eventually cured by another of Lovecraft's characters, specifically by reverse-engineering the chemistry of entheogenic substances like peyote flower.

 

Aren't lolitas cute? Maybe next time you can ask her if she wants to ride on your back or sit down on your lap so you both can enjoy a book or movie.

 

If Bebinator won't include tails, why not draw one in Paint or use photographic manipulation software to add a tail to her rendered form? Have you considered drawing her form and equipment in a notebook or upon a tablet peripheral for your machine?

She likes to ride on my shoulders, or walk besides me. I don't own PhotoShop (but I could pirate it, I guess), and I'm fairly poor at drawing. But on the topic of notebooks, I keep a dream journal, and I have been trying (in vain) to acheive lucidity. For instance, once I had a dream, far before I began tulpamancy, where I was in an old, greying barn (perhaps my fathers, which he recently demolished, I think) and I was exploring it with an unknown, brightly colored entity. Looking back, it sort of reminds me of Verdict as she is now.

 

Verdict has again remodeled some features of the Forest Zone (confirmed, she did it, not some odd subconscious force). Now, the luminorbs on the trees slowly phase through a spectrum of bright, but soft colors. Verdict's hair and eyes (including ear and tail fur) also exhibit this trait. It's incredibly relaxing, but probably bound to make visual imposition slightly more difficult, with the ever-changing colors and whatnot.

 

On the topic of imposition, I thought up this: If life is a constant series of stimulus of all four senses, it would make sense to be able to willingly limit and expand this stimulus.

 

Perhaps such a mindset will be beneficial.

mew.

~~~~~~~

Tulpas (and what color they speak in):

Verdict

Daiyousei

 

 

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Alright.

 

Lucid dreaming attempts begin tonight.

 

I have come across a little guide to "have a lucid dream tonight guaranteed", so to test it's legitness I will try it tonight.

 

I'll try not to be disappointed if it doesn't work.

 

The guide can be found here:

http://howtolucid.com/how-to-lucid-dream-tonight/

mew.

~~~~~~~

Tulpas (and what color they speak in):

Verdict

Daiyousei

 

 

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Okay yeah that didn't work, probably because I stayed up too late. Going to try again tonight.

 

 

 

Let the vigorous reality-checking continue.

 

In other news, Verdict changed her hair and the luminorbs again.

Now it's all red.

Going to attempt to draw tail in Paint, so excuse me if it looks absolutely horrible.

Her eyes are red too. So it seems that her hair color, the color of the luminorbs, and the color of her eyes are consistently linked.

How odd.

verdict-red.png.8acae25498a1f37e57c3bbbaf84ee883.png

mew.

~~~~~~~

Tulpas (and what color they speak in):

Verdict

Daiyousei

 

 

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  • 3 weeks later...

alright, big thoughts tonight

 

people are always saying "Reality is not based on perception, but perception is based on reality." 

I don't understand this.

How can't perception be based on reality? I think perception, and therefore reality, is based on the consciousnesses that affect it. For example, a baby is born right now, in the "present." Their consciousness starts there, and the technology that is available to us today, their family, their situation, the country they are born in, that is all accepted as fact, as "reality," straight off the bat. But if a baby is born at the same time, and has dissociative personality disorder, or schizophrenia, or any physical disorder, is also immediately accepted. It all depends where the consciousness starts, when it starts, and what immediately affects it. But "reality" can also be changed with time. If I were to solidly and consistently visually impose Verdict, that would be integrated into my view of reality. If I switched out and hung out in the Flipside with Verdict for a while, or if changes happened to the Flipside, that would be integrated as a part of her reality.

 

What he's trying to say is, in this way, reality is subjective.

 

first time I've said anything here, wow~

mew.

~~~~~~~

Tulpas (and what color they speak in):

Verdict

Daiyousei

 

 

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  • 2 weeks later...

alright I think it's about time for a real update and less thoughtposting.

 

Over the past couple of days I have been on a camping trip, which gave a lot of time to hang around with and generally force Verdict. At about the beginning of the trip, she changed her hair again, and seeing as how the change has lasted this long, it seems to be at least semi-permanent. The color this time is a kind of gold. Not blond, but radiant and shiny gold. It's kinda weird to look at. But, she seems to like it more than any other color thus far, and I like it, so I guess she'll keep it this way for now.

 

Earlier today (or maybe yesterday, it's kinda late now), we got on the subject of possibly having other tulpae running about in my cranium. Verdict liked the idea, as it would be easier than the first time round, and would also provide extra company while I am busy with schoolwork or focused on some other task (i.e. vidya). In her words, she said "It would be similar to having a sister, of sorts." 

 

So, the beginnings of Daiyousei will come in the morning.

mew.

~~~~~~~

Tulpas (and what color they speak in):

Verdict

Daiyousei

 

 

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Great to see you back!

 

When we envision Verdict with golden hair, for some reason we imagine the fibres coalescing into gold ingots maintaining her hair's general shape.

 

I like how Verdict regards another potential tulpa like a sister. One group of tulpas we know rather fondly has a relationship akin to sisterhood despite being so different in appearance and personality...it's really heartwarming.

 

We hope you had a good time on your camping trip and that you're both in good health.

 

As to the nature of reality...who knows? I'm not a philosopher and I despise armchair psychiatry, so my conclusions on the matter of reality as we ought to understand it are scant. If you'd like I could provide some opinions on the matter, but outside of being hollow and depressing they are, above all, opinions.

I've seen good people bleed

And I thought I'd seen it all

But my own two eyes would prove me wrong that day.

 

There are things that I've done

Only seen by the sun

And those things will be buried in my grave.

 

 

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Your imagining of Verdict's new hair is cool, to say the least. Never really thought of it like that. It's nice to know other groups of tulpas being so close despite differences in physical appearance and personality. We are quite well, thanks for thinking of us. As for the trip, some clothes got wet, but everything dries. It would be great to hear some outside opinions about reality, as mine seems a little...unreal, for lack of a better term. Also, how can I change the name of a thread? Verdict had the grand idea of changing it to something like "Nekos and Fairies."

 

On the topic of progress, Daiyousei is fitting in quite nicely, and moving right along. She can already manipulate what I call the "general headpressure." I call it this because both the girls are affecting it, and when I ask one for a quick, simple and fast yes/no answer, a little bit dissipates and the remainder increases or decreases accordingly. I think I've gotten used to using head pressure as a symbol of presence, and I'm not entirely sure if I would feel comfortable if it ever stops. I hope that doesn't hinder progress of any kind.

mew.

~~~~~~~

Tulpas (and what color they speak in):

Verdict

Daiyousei

 

 

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