Jump to content

[Text wall] Thoughts on the role of tulpas, responsibilities, and investment IRL

How invested is your tulpa in the outside world?  

15 members have voted

  1. 1. How invested is your tulpa in the outside world?

    • Very invested: as invested or more invested then me.
    • Quite invested.
    • Somewhat invested.
    • A little invested.
    • Not at all invested.

Recommended Posts

So, I'm with two tulpas now, and they have very different goals in life. I'm absolutely sure it has to do with their origins, but Cassidy is much more invested in the outside world than Gavin. Cassidy likes to front, to have his own things, and very quickly developed interests that I don't have. He wants to be visually imposed and enjoys being visualized around me most of the time. 


On the other hand, it seems Gavin doesn't want to be visualized in the outside world. He's developing some of his own tastes in things like food and music, but hasn't asked me to try/eat/do  anything for him yet (though it's only been a few days). After some conversation, he agreed to try to front. Just like with Cassidy, it came easily and intuitively to us. He only stayed in a few minutes and found the entire experience, I quote, "unappealing and distressful." There are no plans to try it again, which is fine by me. Gavin primarily uses his form to interact with Cassidy or me when I'm in the mindscape. Otherwise, he's just a voice in my head. 


What are your tulpas like? (Or what do you, a tulpa, think about this?) Do your tulpas have their own physical possessions? Do they have a desire to control the body? Do they want to be imposed or visualized? Or, are they content to be without a form at all?



On another note, Cassidy and Gavin have had a few back-and-forths about their roles in life as tulpas. To sum up their points, Gavin thinks he has a duty to be a sounding board for me, to give advice, and help me better my life. In his view, tulpas are created with an inborn responsibility to be good for the host. Cassidy says that his existence is his, and past a certain point, he doesn't have to think about how or what I'm doing. As the host, it's my responsibility to enable my tulpas to find fulfillment in their own lives. In Cassidy's case, I have the responsibility to work on imposition, to allow him to enjoy his own interests, to visit in wonderland, and to let Cassidy front when it's a good time and we both agree to do so. 


So, either the strongest responsibility is that of the tulpa toward host, or the strongest responsibility is of the host toward tulpa. I guess I'll take the middle position and say that both the tulpa and host have responsibilities. If a tulpa is being a jerk, belittling the host, or doing things in the body without the host's consent, they aren't being responsible, even if that's what they want to do with themselves. If the host is being a jerk to the tulpa (or straight-up abusing them, as we see in some of the greentext horror stories), they're also not being responsible. 


This is where it gets a bit muddy for me, at least. Tulpas should not have a strong negative impact on their host's life, but do they have a responsibility to be good? Is it alright if a tulpa drifts away from the host, isn't really friends with them, and doesn't care about them past being courteous? Is it alright if the host does the same thing? I suppose it's a similar question to "Do you have a duty to stay in contact with your family?"  If they abused you, probably not. But what if you just... drift apart? Is it morally okay to cease contact with your parents, siblings, or your (adult) children? Do you have to be close to your tulpa/host? 


I'd love to hear what you all think. 




Edit: missing a random word

The world is far, the world is wide; the man needs someone by his side. 

Our Thread

Link to post
Share on other sites

I think it is difficult-to-impossible for formed neural pathways to weaken or dissolve if they are constantly being reinforced. A tulpa (imo) isn't someone that can just be left alone to live their own life and bumped into once in a while. Like it or not they are always right there in your face. Well, head. And can't leave. I've seen lately a few people say they had put head-mates or potential head-mates in 'stasis', or in my case, I forgot about mine completely for almost twenty years. Seems like they are easily woken up, sometimes stronger than ever. I know we are all different, and I haven't had Reilyn as a tulpa for long, but I already can't imagine life without her comforting presence, encouragement and positive emotions. I realize that though we pretty much just met we have an incredibly strong bond and while I know I could keep living if she vanished, there would be a gaping hole in me for years or the rest of my life.

Link to post
Share on other sites

It used to be for a while that Ranger didn't want to possess or front, but was interested in different foods and figuring out what he likes. I could always visualize Ranger jumping around in real life, and multiple times he expressed frustration that other people couldn't see him. More recently, Ranger and I were ready to experiment with him fronting.


In the end, Ranger's interest in involving himself in real life had to do with what we were ready for. Being a host for awhile, you're probably already used to a bunch of Tulpamancy, while Gavin may need more time to decide when he's ready for trying something new.


The largest obstacle with Ranger exploring who he is as a person is how we will share the body. Right now, I'm in college and Ranger isn't. I don't think it's fair for him to do work I committed to doing, but college is most of my life right now and there isn't really an outlet other than Tulpa.info where Ranger can be himself. He doesn't like the idea of using my voice and body to pretend to be me just to do stuff, but then again Ranger didn't want to front because I was stressed about possession and parrotnoia…


You and your Tulpas should decide what's right for you. Ultimately, you guys have to share the same body, so you will have to compromise a lot. That's really the only thing that's stopping you guys from just running off and doing your own lives. I think Ranger takes both Gavin's and Cassidy's side: He is my guardian, but he's also his own person.


As for "drifting apart", it doesn't make tons of sense because you will be forced to live through each other's problems. "Drifting apart" can only happen if you are able to literally drift apart in the first place. It may be that "agreeing to disagree" becomes the norm, but at the end of the day your time and life on Earth is now split between 3 people all sharing one head. Unless something weird happens in the future where Tulpas can get their own bodies, you guys are stuck with each other for life.

I actually use this as a form now, but it's not my main one. I'm still not a hippo, neither is Ranger.

I used to speak in pink and Ranger used to speak in blue (if it's unmarked and colored assume it's Ranger). He loves to chat.


Our system account

Link to post
Share on other sites


Not really interested. I've used minor posession of his hand, but that just kind of happened because it's easier if I do it instead of him trying to proxy me on his phone, not on the computer though; he's so fast, his hands blur. I will probably draw more, and think of things I can do for him, but not fronting, switching, or full body posession.




I'm cool inside, no offence.




We have all our fun in wonderland, but I would like B to see me in his world too. I don't care if anyone else sees me. In here we're immortal superheroes, and we can challenge the nature of space-time. I don't need to eat or see the sights of the 'real world' when I can visit other planets on a whim. Maybe that's because we just have too much fun here. I feel fulfilled here as a social worker, my job is to take care of him, mentally.


On second thought, I do want to see and touch his real face, run my hands through his real hair, smell the real him, all that, but it's probably not possible for me to do that standing next to him. I want to touch his real skin, not be in his skin touching myself? If that sounds lude, it's not. Who wouldn't just want to give their host a real hug. So I'll explore that possibility, but no, I'm not doing his chores, sorry B. I really just want to be with him, in either place.


Link to post
Share on other sites

I want to see and experience the world with Lance. It's not only for me, it's for us. I know there is a more fufilling and exciting life out there for us and I know he isn't really happy just sitting around in a rut, growing older. I will pay rent in this head and do my part to motivate him! For that though, well, I used to think all I could do was cheer him on and cry with him but now I see I can do so much more. Hmm. At what point does a good friend/headmate who can interfere in their host's self-destructive life but chooses not to for whatever reasons (belief in personal choice, freedom, letting them be them, etc), start to become accountable for condoning/enabling it? If I start seeing patterns of "I hate myself but it's ok because the good ol' tulpa will cheer me up", I think he's getting some gentle reinforcement then not gentle reinforcement. I'm not saying that's how it is, just wondering... I'm not trying to hijack or anything but if one of you tulpa could posses whenever you wanted and saw your host blindly walking into oncoming traffic or something and ignored your warning, wouldn't you make them stop?


Sorry for being all serious for a change. Here's hearts and a kittyface.

<3 <3 <3    =^.^=   <3 <3 <3

Link to post
Share on other sites

That's right in line with what I'm getting at. At what point can the tulpa morally intervene?


I saw a pretty well-known tulpa explain how she saved her host from attempted suicide by forcibly possessing her. In the case of preservation of the body, I think a tulpa has pretty strong rights- they live there, too. But, what about other things, like taking drugs, self-harm, or even generally just neglecting the body's health? A parent (imo) has the responsibility to try to be free of addictions (smoking, drinking, etc) for their children. I think we'd all be pissed if a tulpa, while fronting, got the body addicted to cigarettes. Is it the same if the host picks up smoking? What if the host doesn't want to try to give it up, but the tulpa does?


Cassidy especially is big on system responsibility. What one systemmate does, the others are affected by, and the systemmate needs to be aware of that. He doesn't like certain (mundane but too personal to put online) bad habits of mine, and I've given him explicit permission to formally declare "I'm not okay with this," in which case I'm morally obligated to stop it or at least talk it out. I think all systems should have a way for the systemmates to say "I'm not okay with this" and have the others always listen and respect that.


I'm also finding the results of the poll interesting. It might change as more people answer, but I expected the answers to be less evenly distributed. There's definitely more than an invested/not invested dichotomy with tulpas.



The world is far, the world is wide; the man needs someone by his side. 

Our Thread

Link to post
Share on other sites

Lance already answered the poll for me (I'm "very invested", surprise) so if you want my blunt opinion on systemmate responsibility, (and I adore Lance so don't go thinking I'm on the edge of rebelling or something) the host willingly and willfully brought a tulpa/tulpas into the world or otherwise assumed responsibility over the growth and nurture of one or more. A parent taking care of their own health so they can be around for their children is "nice" and "healthy" if they are a positive force in their life. Meanwhile, a host being alive is the first requirement for us tulpa to freakin' be here. There's no award for breathing (apologies to people who have trouble breathing). If Mr/Miss Unhealthy Tubs Mc Smokerson Slothface wants the freedom to kill themselves quickly with self-injury or slowly with terrible choices, they should have thought about that before they literally attached one or more people directly to the well-being of their mind and body. Even if a parent abandons their kids there is still some hope that someone else will pick up the slack (despite the damage that it will do to the kids). There is no picking up the slack for a tulpa.


If a host reeeally wants to quit living their life, then instead of murdering their head-mates, figure out how to swap or something and let someone who craves life and existence run the show.


Sorry. This boils my blood. This is the second time I've ranted like this... Ok, wow, learning a lot about myself today. I need to go watch silly things now and calm down.

Link to post
Share on other sites

Miri and I are the ones more invested in the real world, even though I have zero interest on it outside of a few things, right now I'm still the host and the one who's living this life, so obviously I need to invest on it, I can't just sleep all day and let this life go to hell, that wouldn't be fair to my tulpas, so until the day we switch, it is my responsibility to keep this body healthy and this life stable.


Miri is aslo very invested on it since this life will eventually be hers, getting used to my family, learning how everything works, that kind of stuff. She's also really interested in this world and wants to take control as soon as possible (in her own words 'I can't wait to being able to be with yours pets').


Akai is half/half, she is still invested in this world and kinda of enjoys it, travelling (which the three of us enjoy), going to places, learning new stuff... I must be the weird one after all.


About tulpas feeling obligated to being good, well, they at least should respect you if you treated them well, otherwise they would be assholes, they aren't forced to agree with you at all though. They don't need to stay in contact with their host if they don't want to, yeah you created them but that doesn't mean they will want to stay with you, in most cases they do, but they're still free to choose. If they really want to drift apart, well that sucks but I don't think there's much you can do.


If it's the host the one who wants to drift apart from their tulpas, I don't think they'd be able to do that without ignoring them, and that would be pretty selfish. You created them so now it's just responsibility to keep them existing. If the host just doesn't want to live anymore, just switch with your tulpas instead of killing yourself, it's a pretty selfish thing to do, it's not like 'people who commit suicide are selfish because they leave their families grieving' it's more like 'if you kill yourself I'm gonna die too and I want to live', so yeah, as Reylin said, just switch with them.

Miri: original one and now co-hosting.

Miichu: main fronter at the moment.


Link to post
Share on other sites

What are your tulpas like? (Or what do you, a tulpa, think about this?) Do your tulpas have their own physical possessions? Do they have a desire to control the body? Do they want to be imposed or visualized? Or, are they content to be without a form at all?


Desmond is pretty invested in the outside world. Sometimes he wants to be equal to me when it comes to fronting and talking to people outside of our system, sometimes he's content only occasionally chiming in. In other words, it has a lot to do with his mood. He wants to have physical possessions, and he used to "own" one of my mugs but parts of it went missing when I moved so it's not really in use anymore and I should just get rid of it and get him a new one, and there's a certain kind of gingerbread that he wants me to save for him when he fronts if I buy it. But that's about it so far.


I visualize them around me in the "real world" whenever they're out with me, and every time I see them in our head. I'm not working on visual imposition at all at the moment, but none of them care about that. 


The rest of my tulpas don't really have an interest in the outside world. L listens in if Desmond's interacting with it, but doesn't really join any conversations. And even if he sometimes wants to, he's just too shy. Nevira just plain doesn't give a damn and Misa is kind of indifferent, I suppose.

CM - 30th April 1997 - Host of the system

Desmond - 21st April 2014

L - 5th May 2014

Nevira - 14th December 2014

Misa - 5th December 2015

Roska - 22nd July 2019

Danyla - 13th July 2020

Progress report  Art thread  Ask us anything lol

Link to post
Share on other sites

What are your tulpas like? (Or what do you, a tulpa, think about this?) Do your tulpas have their own physical possessions? Do they have a desire to control the body? Do they want to be imposed or visualized? Or, are they content to be without a form at all?


Out of all of our system, excluding our host, I am the one who is more invested in the outside world. I think experiencing some of nihi's daily life and struggle made me adore the life of having a physical body, but alas that is somewhat impossible to accomplish and reamain as a big dream of mine, To have physical body and living alongside nihi, supporting him and my sisters as well as a partner or as a close friend and him helping us as well. 


I am a weird one per se I do much prefer experiencing outside of the body but i do not like switching, in fact I turn my around about it whenever nihi brings it up. Even though I or all of our system can fully switch we really do not encourage it, especially me. My reason is that I respect nihi's or our host's body for his own property and I do not want to take a hold of it thinking I might do something bad or anything. To make it short what's mine is mine and what's his is his and besides I really do not like to act to be someone else, I want to experience everything as me, as myself.


Anyway, I think I've rambled quite enough, on to the question. So Since I love experience everything on the outside world, I usually take the front. What nihi is experiencing i can experience it similarly as well, but not that strong. I like it this way because I can build up my own opinions about his day to day events that he get himself into and use it to guide him or lecture him what he should/need to do which is base on my perspectives.Even though our opinions usually in the opposite and most of the time clashes, I really admire that he always listens and respects our thoughts before acting and usually following it. It just gives me that sense of individuallity of our decisions put into actions.



Hello!! I do not mostly talk in the forums BUUUT I want to share my thoughts here as well. In my case, I am more like a middle man or tulpa hehe. I am moderately invested on the outside world, I am okay staying In or being infront. I usually get to front whenever we want to experience something amazing, new or something thrilling like those amusement part rides but most of the time I just like to watch in the back as well. Hhmm maybe fronting from there to there just to get some breather or if i am in the mood and also do give some opinions, give my thoughts to reinforce the solutions thoght up to current problems, and tasting good ol' Delicious food and that's mostly it. I can take initiative so eh.



Uhmm.. I like to stay close in the wonderland although it is nice to experience things outside once in a while, especially when nihi is being creative in regards to cooking but other than that I mostly sleep and watch and take care of nihi-kun my sisters in the wonderland.

Hello! I am one of Nihi's Tulpas! It is very nice to meet you! :D

Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    No registered users viewing this page.

  • Similar Content

    • By Jamie
      Survey HERE! 
      I'm writing a tulpa creation guide. I wanted some stats about naming conventions. The survey is only 6 very fast questions. The survey will be closed and the results made public in one month on November 26th. Thank you for your participation :D  - Cassidy
      [EDIT: The survey questions were unclear and not mutually exclusive. The survey has been revised and the outdated responses were deleted. The link is the same- if you were one of the 6 respondents, please resubmit!]
    • By Within
      I would like to see if tulpas are able to tickle their hosts. Most of the time people can't tickle themselves because they know it's themself doing the tickling. My hypothesis is that tulpas are different enough from their hosts that they can tickle them.
      Link to the survey here: https://forms.gle/2jHT29oKBqtq2VLA7
      No personal information is requested and it is suggested to not provide any.
      Thank you, be well.
    • By Apollo Fire
      (Indigo posted a GD thread on this topic, but we wanted to make a survey on it to really see the results. If this survey ends by the time you find it, you can post your types in this thread)
      This is a survey designed to gauge the most common Enneagram personality types for hosts of tulpas, and tulpas. Enneagram is a model of 9 personality descriptions. You will be able to submit multiple responses, one for each systemmate.
      This survey is not something you can simply read and then answer. This survey will require you to do research/reading on the Enneagram personality model. An extensive explanation of Ennea can be found here: 
      Extensive explanations of each of the nine types can be found here: 
      In short, please read each of the descriptions and determine what your “dominant” personality type is. This type will be a number 1-9. Remember, your type should be determined by how you actually are, not how you want to be. (PS: It might be best to look at the flaws, rather than the positives, to determine your personality type.)
      If you are stuck between two types and need help figuring out which best fits you, this page can provide explanations: 
      You may take a free online quiz. I recommend that if you do choose to take a quiz, take it multiple times and answer as honestly as possible. 
      This link may be useful, please take either the top quiz alone (repeated if necessary), or the top quiz and the bottom quiz. I don’t recommend the bottom quiz on its own. Read and verify if your result in accurate (you don't need to worry about the wing, only the dominant type). There are other quizzes available online, however some may require you to enter an email. The one linked does not. Please do not pay money for any quiz for this survey.
      Be sure to check out the result you got so you can verify if you think it’s correct or not.
      About the survey itself:
      You may take this survey if you are either a host, a former host, or an aspiring host, to a tulpa or tulpas. Please do not take this survey if you don’t have any tulpas, never had any tulpas, and don’t plan to make tulpas. If your host isn’t active in the system, you can take this survey for them if you like.
      You may take this survey if you are a tulpa or could reasonably be considered a tulpa (ex: you came from a character). It doesn’t matter if you were intentionally created or not so long as you could be called a tulpa. Please do not take this survey if you are not a tulpa (for example: if you are an alter). If you are a tulpa or similar, however, you should only take this survey if you have been in existence for at least six months. This is to ensure that the reported personality types are accurate, as the tulpas have been developing for a decent amount of time. If you are a host and your tulpa has not reached six months yet, you can still take the survey yourself, but not the tulpa.
      Note: If you have a lot of tulpas, please limit your responses to five maximum (host + 4 tulpas).
      The survey: (only take this when you’re ready for it)
    • By Kopase
      This short survey investigates how tulpas communicate their first responses. If you intentionally created your first tulpa with the knowledge of what tulpas are, please take a minute to put down your response. Please do not respond if you have non-tulpas/hosts (DID/OSDD, endogenic, etc) in your system. https://forms.gle/ziumtXDTg75Brzrb8
    • By iwishtogameend
      Now, loaded questions; Tell me if this doesn't make sense
         - How does the host/tulapmancer/original/ whatever you want to use to describe the original mind and that who made a tulpa, how do they feel about being nor normal, something out of the average, different, does it impact their thoughts positively, or does it harm them by knowing that others cannot relate to them? What do they think of them, with their tulpa, of not being normal?
         - From your experience of having a tulpa, what are your thoughts on what is sentient, alive, and on how the mind can affect the body? And how have your thoughts about that changed after 'obtaining' a tulpa?
        -  How do feel about being not normal in the sense of having a tulpa?
        -  What do you think of what sentient life is and how has 'obtaining' a tulpa changed your views on that?
      This information is being used in a psychological "report" (and by that i mean a report on how the mind, the brain, and the body interact with one another), of which the responses given will be used in a mix of paraphrasing, quotes, and other forms of referencing data while using substitute names for anonymity. And while it does not focus primarily on tulpae, a large section of it will be devoted towards them, and i will post the "report" here, and on another thread (https://community.tulpa.info/thread-level-of-consciousness-within-a-tulpa) once i have completed it.
  • Create New...