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So this is a question for the tulpa community, because I’ve been wondering for a while about it. So I have a character Tulpa, Pinkamena. If anyone here has had the misfortune to stumble on my account before, they may be familiar with that. There’s an eccentricity of hers that I would like to ask the community about. My interactions with my tulpa are kind of hectic I guess, to say the least, because I’ve got a bit of a parroting problem. I’m getting to the point where I can usually get a feel for when something I think she said came from an intrusive or from parroting, but at the same time, I usually have to run things past her another time or two to make sure. This has made it imperative that I can “see” her form when I’m talking to her outside the wonderland(Which is my prefered mode of interaction) because beyond the physical equivalent of tulpish, gestures are far more consistently reliable. Maybe it’s because my first tulpa never reached vocality and so I have more experience with body language than vocality. Since her form has become more prevalent she’s displayed some weird behaviors involving her form. Her hair will change from pin straight(Ala the art of my profile) to poofy(Looking like that of her television counterpart) sometimes her behavior can change with it(Either getting more erratic and excited with the poofy hair and quieter, sometimes depressed or angry, and generally calmer with the pin straight), but mostly it seems to be intertwined with mood. However, sometimes her behavior and form can change in a weird way, she can take on this unsettling manic look and start saying and doing things that are well unpleasant(Like last night, when I dropped my drink, and walked past her she just stared smiling and laughing at me, and then said she liked watching me suffer, or her many insinuations we should beat someone to death when they’re being unpleasant or kill the pets.) She just starts acting like this, and looking like this, and then she’s normal later. I’m not here to whine about it, she’s always suggested these kind of things, and I mostly just laugh it off, but I’m more curious about her mood swings and weird form and behavior switches. Anyone else have anything like this happen with their tulpa? I also just want to stress these unsettling behaviors are the minority of her behavior, in fact the suffering comment came out of nowhere and caught me off guard.

 

Removed formatting that's hard to read with the default theme - Vos

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I'm trying to go by "if you don't have anything nice to say don't say anything at all" but since you asked I'm gonna say.. I haven't heard anyone having issues like this. You take a crazy, possibly murderous base character then try to intentionally force and encourage her to match what you think the character is, you get what you want. Can't complain if she is random. I guess you do you but it seems kinda disrespectful to a tulpa to try to intentionally make them crazy.

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I'm trying to go by "if you don't have anything nice to say don't say anything at all" but since you asked I'm gonna say.. I haven't heard anyone having issues like this. You take a crazy, possibly murderous base character then try to intentionally force and encourage her to match what you think the character is, you get what you want. Can't complain if she is random. I guess you do you but it seems kinda disrespectful to a tulpa to try to intentionally make them crazy.

 

Eh reasonable stance. I didn't necessarily try and make her crazy, nor did I force or encourage her to act like she acts.  I'm not complaining, I'm curious if anyone else has tulpas that have odd behavior like this, and that odd behavior isn't about her murderous tendencies, because I know where those stem from, but the mood swings. Also she's not random at all, in fact she's very deliberate in most things she does. Either way thanks for the response I suppose.

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Tewi already wrote a post for you, and y'know, I feel like your questions were answered many times in your old threads

Anyways, https://community.tulpa.info/thread-general-so-my-tulpa-is-depressed-and-i-need-some-help-helping-her?pid=214964#pid214964

[hidden]

Have you considered watching Party of One again?

She was like that for a reason. Not murderous mind you, that's creepypasta/fanfic nonsense you should never base anything on. But Pinkie Pie became depressed and a little psychotic because she thought she'd lost all of her friends.

 

I was already thinking this reading your post, and then you say "Right now the only thing she’s said might make her feel better is if I spend more time with her", which completely reinforces what I was already going to say. You and her just need to be convinced/believe she'll be better in the first place, this is the base answer that goes without saying. There's no logical basis behind how she is. But, to help you guys get there, I recommend you keep in mind why the original Pinkie was "like that" in the first place; she was lonely. She's the type who needs friends and activity all the time or she gets depressed. Our Lucilyn is like that too, and being cooped up in the mind alone all the time would surely dampen her mood (although she's very good at staying in a good mood through any situation).

 

Mind you our Lucilyn often switches to play games and have fun with other people, and switching/possession may be a poor idea if your tulpa thinks killing things is fun. Try and fix that. But you yourself can supplement a tulpa's inability to interact with others by spending a lot of time with them, especially wonderlanding or imposition and doing activities with them. She told you herself she wants you to spend more time with her, and I'm telling you (based on association with her original influence...'s influence) she'd be fine if she weren't lonely.

 

While the original episode was meant in a comedic manner and people don't actually go insane from being somewhat lonely, it was as the show often is giving a message about friendship or something. A mix between "Don't assume people don't like you because they're doing something else" and "Remember to pay attention to your friends, especially when they're feeling lonely".

 

 

But yeah cut out that creepypasta influence crap. It causes senseless drama and generally unhappy tulpas. Believing "she's just like this now" is the only reason she won't change. Tulpas change plenty in their formative years, just like any other person. My systemmates are mostly seven years old (Lucilyn is 3), and I'd say we didn't stop changing as people rather drastically until about 4 years in. We still change, as does our host, as does any human, but it's slowed down a lot since then.

 

Based on your progress report you seem very set in the idea she's "just like this now" and like you're subconsciously intending it to stay that way. You want change, but subconsciously you want the drama of having her be unstable. I can't say this for sure, but let's just say after years of reading all posts on the forum (and a little experience of our own) I've gotten pretty good at telling this sort of thing. I know it feels lame having your tulpa change basic parts about themselves once they're sentient, and to an extent they shouldn't because it would hurt their sense of identity. But this "psychotic killer" influence might just be worth downplaying some. Tulpas' personalities are not set in stone.. ever really, although later on changes will be more gradual, but especially not in the first year or so. I don't know how old your Pinkamena is, but I doubt she's any older than that. Our Flandre wasn't the most sane person either in her formative years, also due to influence from the character she was based on. But she outgrew that and became her own person, and not a trace of that "insanity" remains anymore.

 

Believing she can change plays a big part in that. Her wanting to (in our case, as she realized she was a poor influence on our host, whom she loved) is important too.

[/hidden]

 

Anyways, other tulpas like that? Sure, our old Flandre was like that a little bit before we split her into two tulpas with her positive and negative emotions.. But that was kind of an immature way to deal with it, because our system WAS immature back then, young teens years you don't always think so logically even if you think you do. So yeah even in systems with tulpas like this (not that common), it's always a matter of maturity and mental discipline, and just being realistic I guess. If you wanna be realistic.. read Tewi's post

woulda been easier to change three months ago, but.. people are always changing, forever, tulpas a little more easily than hosts

 

actually aside from our old Flan I don't know any other tulpas who specifically had crazy mood swings really, btw

Hi, I'm one of Lumi's tulpas! I like rain and dancing and dancing in the rain and if there's frogs there too that's bonus points.

I think being happy and having fun makes life worth living, so spreading happiness is my number one goal!

Talk to us? https://community.tulpa.info/thread-ask-lumi-s-tulpas

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Tewi already wrote a post for you, and y'know, I feel like your questions were answered many times in your old threads

Anyways, https://community.tulpa.info/thread-general-so-my-tulpa-is-depressed-and-i-need-some-help-helping-her?pid=214964#pid214964

[hidden][/hidden]

 

Anyways, other tulpas like that? Sure, our old Flandre was like that a little bit before we split her into two tulpas with her positive and negative emotions.. But that was kind of an immature way to deal with it, because our system WAS immature back then, young teens years you don't always think so logically even if you think you do. So yeah even in systems with tulpas like this (not that common), it's always a matter of maturity and mental discipline, and just being realistic I guess. If you wanna be realistic.. read Tewi's post

woulda been easier to change three months ago, but.. people are always changing, forever, tulpas a little more easily than hosts

 

actually aside from our old Flan I don't know any other tulpas who specifically had crazy mood swings really, btw

 

Oh, well now I feel like a dumb ass lol. I haven't been on the forum in a while so I didn't remember I had already asked this. Sorry thanks for linking me. Might just delete this since it's a repeat I guess.

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it's fine, the thread topic is original, but for your case in specific we've already said what we could y'know

Hi, I'm one of Lumi's tulpas! I like rain and dancing and dancing in the rain and if there's frogs there too that's bonus points.

I think being happy and having fun makes life worth living, so spreading happiness is my number one goal!

Talk to us? https://community.tulpa.info/thread-ask-lumi-s-tulpas

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it's fine, the thread topic is original, but for your case in specific we've already said what we could y'know

 

No I completely get it. I haven't been on the forums in a while, so I forgot I had asked about it before.

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I don't want to sound too redundant because I remember talking about this before, but looking back I don't think I explained it very clearly. These verbal threats coming out of Pinkamena's mouth may actually be coming out of yours, and this boils down to mindset issue. If you associate these erratic angry urges as part of who she is, then she will continue to have these "mood swings", kind of like personality forcing I guess. Realizing that these things don't define her and then you and Pinkamena working together to separate yourselves from the intrusive behavior will cause the "mood swings" and erratic behavior to stop.

 

I really don't like talking about this because I was influenced by Cat's self-hatred when I was younger, and I said and did things I don't want to think about. I'm not going into detail about what went on, but sometimes these episodes happened out-of-the-blue and sometimes they were the center of or a part of Cat's anxiety episode.

 

As soon as she realized that it was her words controlling me, we figured out how to make it stop. I built up a resistance to her own anxiety, and at the same time Cat made a huge effort to reverse her thinking so she wasn't as harsh to herself. I don't know how Pinkamena feels about the situation, but I hated feeling powerless and being the messenger of all of that self-hate.

 

It's one thing to have a colorful personality and say things for the heck of character, but this situation is a completely different. I doubt Pinkamena actually likes this, much less wants to define this as a part of who she is.

Not my main form or name really but this nick is my brand now. You may see my headmates call me Gray.

I used to speak in pink and Ranger used to speak in blue (if it's unmarked and colored assume it's Ranger). She loves to chat.

 

Our system account

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I don't want to sound too redundant because I remember talking about this before, but looking back I don't think I explained it very clearly. These verbal threats coming out of Pinkamena's mouth may actually be coming out of yours, and this boils down to mindset issue. If you associate these erratic angry urges as part of who she is, then she will continue to have these "mood swings", kind of like personality forcing I guess. Realizing that these things don't define her and then you and Pinkamena working together to separate yourselves from the intrusive behavior will cause the "mood swings" and erratic behavior to stop.

 

I really don't like talking about this because I was influenced by Cat's self-hatred when I was younger, and I said and did things I don't want to think about. I'm not going into detail about what went on, but sometimes these episodes happened out-of-the-blue and sometimes they were the center of or a part of Cat's anxiety episode.

 

As soon as she realized that it was her words controlling me, we figured out how to make it stop. I built up a resistance to her own anxiety, and at the same time Cat made a huge effort to reverse her thinking so she wasn't as harsh to herself. I don't know how Pinkamena feels about the situation, but I hated feeling powerless and being the messenger of all of that self-hate.

 

It's one thing to have a colorful personality and say things for the heck of character, but this situation is a completely different. I doubt Pinkamena actually likes this, much less wants to define this as a part of who she is.

 

Hey, I appreciate the advice, but I'm pretty sure that's not what's happening. I don't know if I've made this clear but the reason I have to be able to see her while we talk is that there is an acknowledged problem with me confusing thoughts for what she's saying, and what you mentioned. I run most things she says by her once or twice, and for the most part I like to think I know when something isn't coming from her because I check in all the time. I wouldn't mention something that I wasn't 90 percent sure came from her.There are no threats, she says things that involve violence sometimes, but it's not a frequent occurrence. I was really trying to ask about the fact that she changes her form and acts different sometimes. I also ran it past her again today(I've asked her at least three or four times since I made her if when she said these kinda things it was coming from me) since you mentioned it and once again she's said that they aren't coming from me(Well, as not coming from me as anything can be from a tulpa). I don't really think that these things define her, I was curious and didn't realize I had already asked about this a few months ago.

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