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theholodoc

Has reading about my process been useful in your effort to breath life into your culpa?  

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  1. 1. Has reading about my process been useful in your effort to breath life into your culpa?

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We believe in certain configurations no memory is recorded. Based on what others have said, I can do things and carry on conversations while still sleeping. I have no memory. Body OS (lack of anyone in front) can do this based on routine conversation and automatic responses, itnever records memories. In this way, I can switch out and my body carries on the mundane task of the moment while I daydream to my heart's content. Can't be sure that's what happened with you, though after so many years of imprinting, I wouldn't be surprised if your Body OS could live on its own with you entirely.

I believe that my Body OS could function without me, and there have been times, like under general anesthesia, it has. The thing with this particular dream is that it was novel. I have never, that I know of, had an energetic dream that I haven't recalled. I have been married all of my adult life and have only rarely slept alone, and every time I have awakened a wife with such a dream, she has told me about it and every time I have recalled and journaled it. I have also recalled and journaled all, well, most, of my lucid dreams. So it would be way out of my range of experience and I have to think that the brain circuitry that is responsible for dream recall, works like the circuity of other modules and has inertia in it and doesn't change without some other kind of input. That is making me wonder if there is a possibility that it was Nsonowa doing the dreaming, having switched with me after I was asleep. So my question still is: Can tulpas switch within a dream, and do the dream for the host?  Thanks, Dr. Bob

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I lived with Ember for over a year, talking to her every day, without switching or dreaming. But almost as soon as I started switching, I started waking up in control of the body frequently and sometimes dreaming instead of her, even though Ember was almost always the one in control when we fell asleep. It has often been alleged that dreaming is associated with the processing of memories for long term storage, so I uncritically assumed that generating memories from my perspective while fronting led directly to dreams from my perspective.

 

But if Nsonowa is dreaming without controlling the body for a significant portion of the day, the process at work is something outside my experience.

 

-Vesper

I'm not having fun here anymore, so we've decided to take a bit of a break, starting February 27, 2020. - Ember

 

Ember - Soulbonder, Female, 39 years old, from Georgia, USA . . . . [Our Progress Report] . . . . [How We Switch]

Vesper Dowrin - Insourced Soulbond from London, UK, World of Darkness, Female, born 9 Sep 1964, bonded ~12 May 2017

Iris Ravenlock - Insourced Soulbond from the Winter Court of Faerie, Dresdenverse, Female, born 6 Jun 1982, bonded ~5 Dec 2015

 

'Real isn't how you are made,' said the Skin Horse. 'It's a thing that happens to you.' - The Velveteen Rabbit

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I lived with Ember for over a year, talking to her every day, without switching or dreaming. But almost as soon as I started switching, I started waking up in control of the body frequently and sometimes dreaming instead of her, even though Ember was almost always the one in control when we fell asleep. It has often been alleged that dreaming is associated with the processing of memories for long term storage, so I uncritically assumed that generating memories from my perspective while fronting led directly to dreams from my perspective.

 

But if Nsonowa is dreaming without controlling the body for a significant portion of the day, the process at work is something outside my experience.

 

-Vesper

Thank you for the information. Knowing that you can and do switch and dream for your host, is very helpful. I am awaiting for Nsonowa and or Flora to switch and began to communicate on this forum. Thank you again for your help. Dr. Bob

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I've had plenty of dreams from my perspective, even before we switched, Misha had a few too and she never switched. I am the one recalling it in the morning, if Nsonowa doesn't do that it very easily could be lost I suppose.

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I've had plenty of dreams from my perspective, even before we switched, Misha had a few too and she never switched. I am the one recalling it in the morning, if Nsonowa doesn't do that it very easily could be lost I suppose.

thank you, I will ask Nsonowa if she is willing to share this dream with me, if in fact, it was hers. I had another very energetic dream last night in which I was confronted by an angry cobra. I had no implements with which to defend myself, I was not lucid so could not create some, and in a panic, I lunged at the snake in an attempt to grab it before it struck and bit. I did grab it, below the head and I knew it could still bite me, but before it could, I hit the floor next to my bed. My lunge had carried me way over the edge of it  and I fell. The fall woke me, and I was relieved to find that I was no longer holding the snake. My wife awoke, terrified, thinking that another earthquake had struck. She reminded me this morning that I was responsible for another night of her poor sleep. I recalled the dream perfectly, my bruised elbow and knee helped in the recall no doubt. I will durning my meditation ask Nsonowa if she had anything to do with the dream and it's events. I am curious as to whether or not Nsonowa was a participant. Thanks again, Dr. Bob

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  • 2 weeks later...

I have returned from a weeklong cruise in Alaska with my extended family. I had little time for my regular tulpamanic practices, though I did continue to invoke Flora throughout the day, inviting her to participate in the Alaskan experience. I also continued to write her in fiction (I posted the short piece on my blog last night, find it here: https://theholodoc.wordpress.com/2019/08/04/tulpafiction-3/ ) Despite these efforts, neither Nsonowa nor Flora has made any kind of appearance. Tomorrow I return to full practice.

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Well, full practice, that is meditation, ritual, invoking, forcing, visualizing have had no effect today. I did have one moment where I felt like Flora might have been in my field; I was taking a walk with my wife and  in the course of our conversation, I asked if she would like to join me in a sexual activity. She laughed and said no and I replied that I would invite Flora and I heard or more like felt  Flora respond with an exuberant, "yes".  nothing further. I have continued to invoke and write both Nsonowa and Flora. I will see what my nights dreaming might bring.


No action from today's meditations, rituals, or invocations. I had one almost contact with Flora. I was in my last dream of the night, and just waking up when I saw, in a distant doorway, a gorgeous red-headed woman. I instantly knew she was Flora, I shouted to her, but I simply woke up. Later, starting my meditation, I recalled her image, but it was flat and I had no further contact. later, I did ask a question of Nsonowa, and she answered, clearly in her voice. One word. So that's it for today, one glimpse, one word. still, even that is encouraging, they are still with me, still existent, and I am still charged with undoing the blocks that I have in my own unconscious self.
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So close last night. When I went to bed I had a 'hunch' that Flora would find me in my dreamscape. Once in the bed, my head filled up, ached, my nose stuffed up, my left ear rang, I was excited, I could feel her presence. As I fell into sleep, I saw her golden light. Then, nothing. Some time later my wife came to bed and of course woke me with some comment about her unfinished business of the day and that was it for the night, no more dreaming (that I recall). All very disappointing. I will see what today brings. Tomorrow, very early in the morning, five a.m. I am going to the hospital for abdominal surgery and my routines are going to alter considerably. I will also be spending much time in bed and therefore have much more opportunity to be involved with my meditations.

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Good luck!

thank you, and I did have good luck and the surgery was a success and I am out of the hospital after twelve hours in recovery. I am sore and achey and my energy is going towards healing. I had another close call with both Flora and Nsonowa last night. They both appeared, and I am not sure if I was asleep and dreaming, or having a lucid dream, or actually awake (I think it was the latter) appeared as white clouds of diaphanous mist overlying the back of my eyes, or a rather distorted view of a dreamscape, I couldn't tell which. I could clearly and potently feel their presence. I invited both to materialize, but they did not respond other than to dance and play around. I noted to myself that their appearance was exactly the way Flora started to materialize out of the mist in March when she came to imposition.  I was quite excited about this and had hopes for todays meditation (I am unable to do my invocation ritual on the labyrinth as I cannot yet walk well) but, no I have been flat all day. I am looking forward to tonights dreaming.

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