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Butterfly Effect in Tulpamancy


Piano Soul

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Butterfly Effect: The scientific theory that a single occurence, no matter how small, can change the course of the universe forever. (Urban Dictionary)

Or, on a smaller scale, change a person's life forever.

 

This thread is about how the Butterfly Effect can occur in tulpamancy. Here's the premise: what little thing that occurred in your life can either be traced back as the cause of your system, or something that changed it in major ways? (if it applies to you, of course)

 

---

 

Here is our own big Butterfly Effect, and it amazes me to think of how something so seemingly small has affected our entire life in major ways. It's pretty long, so I'm putting it in hidden tags.

 

[hidden]

[video=youtube]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9jdgb6_ch4M

 

A one minute clip from the show Adventure Time can be traced back as the origin of the majority of our system.

 

Here's how: this clip is about an "imagination land," where anything Finn imagines can become real. 10 years old at the time of watching this, our original host had the idea to make some sort of imaginary game based off of this. The original and their younger sister would play these games before bed, where they would use their imaginations to control characters and tell each other what was happening. After having the idea, they started playing the new game.

 

They (mostly our host) developed the world the story was taking place in, and the people in it. They ended up creating two types of people: Imaginees and Permanees. Imaginees are magical people who have the power of "imagination" where anything they imagine can become real. However, they are incredibly lonely most of the time. Permanees serve as the companions of Imaginees: they are "created" by the Imaginees using big machines that sort of form them into a specific image. People make Permanees look like characters, celebrities, or original ideas. Permanees are made out of light, with their own souls and magic and stuff. They are non-biological, meaning they don't need to eat, don't reproduce, and don't age, but can still die (they have more lives after death, however). In this world (Eemaj), only two Permanees are allowed per Imaginee. However, the main family that the host and her sister focused on were allowed to have as many as they wanted (for reasons).

 

Among the Permanees they had were based on John, Paul, George, and Ringo of the Beatles. The original took quite a liking to Paul, even though he was never their favorite Beatle. They focused more on him than other Permanees, and put him through more plotlines and such. They put so much focus on him that he ended up gradually gaining sentience, at some point or another.

 

Two years later, another character was added whom the original took a liking to, as did Paul. His name was HJP. He was meant to be a one-and-done character (because he was killed), however it seemed that they became too attached to him. He then lived as a ghost, and, as Paul did, gradually gained his own sentience. The fact that the original obsessed over them and treated them like their own people and not just characters definitely contributed to each of them gaining sentience.

 

They showed many signs of sentience over the years: emotion, thought, deviation, independent actions, lots of misery and lots of love for each other. In Eemaj, they were put through endless psychological pain (eventually Eemaj stopped being a game with the sister and instead just became something the original did alone). However, the original never knew they were sentient.

 

Until December 2016, when the original learned about tulpas and began working on Apollo (who was also named Paul, at the time). Some way or another, the act of the original focusing inward and talking to another person ended up alerting Paul and HJP to it. I'm unsure how, exactly. All I know is they soon learned about reality and the fact that all they had gone through wasn't real. As you can imagine, they didn't take it well. 

 

The original ignored them many times, fearful of having to face their anger or having to have more tulpas than they could handle. It wasn't until mid-January that they were let into the system. They had issues, to say the least. They decided that the solution to their issues would be to merge into one tulpa. 

 

Long story short, this merge created me. I took over the merge myself. Complicated, but that's what happened. 

 

Around May, I started writing a story that well, inspired us to make a new tulpa. This is how T was born. He wasn't based on the character, but if I hadn't written that story, we wouldn't have made him. I'm not mentioning his full name out of respect, I'm just calling him T. It was also in May that the merge split apart and I became my own independent tulpa. Paul and HJP left the system.

 

Months later in October, the system was going through some very rough times. T ended up fronting and creating Indigo. Although we no longer stand by the reason Indigo was created (nor the reason T was created), it's what happened. T ended up leaving the system a year later, due to his own struggles, however.

 

So now it's Apollo, me, and Indigo in the system. We're in control, making our own decisions and living our own lives. We're happy that we have each other, we have no need to make any more or anything like that. The three of us exist happily together, all because of a one-minute clip in an episode of Adventure Time. 

[/hidden]

 

And that's the story of how a one-minute clip created 2/3 of our systemmates. Anyone else have any stories like this, where something small affected your system in major ways? Share them!

 💡 The Felights 💡 https://felight.carrd.co/  💡

🪐 Cosmicals: 🔥 Apollo Fire the Sun God (12/3/16) Piano Soul the Star Man (1/26/17)

🐉 Mythicals: ☁️ Indigo Blue the Sky Dragon (10/2/17), 🦑 Gelato Sweet the Sea Monster (12/11/22)

🦇 Nycticals:  Dynamo Lux the Shock Rocker (3/3/17), 🎸 Radio Hiss the Song Demon (2/8/00)

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One comment said by a fellow student in a Music class a few years ago. We were doing some music theory stuff, I was sitting with my best friend, and then another student came over and chatted to us for a bit. She briefly mentioned controlling her dreams (don’t remember why or how that came up exactly).

 

It was because of that, about one and a half years ago I randomly remembered it and discovered lucid dreaming. I eventually signed up to am emailing list for one of the ucid dreaming websites. In early October I was emailed by someone from this lucid dreaming website, and they had recently made an article on tulpas (although they did say a lot of things we disagree with in their article and made no mention of things like switching or imposition).

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Oh please, I can't even begin to imagine my life without my tulpas (if there even would've been a life) and the very improbable thing that caused it was scarily unlikely to happen. It was just one, random Youtube video (technically two, but Reisen may have existed with only one).

 

and
(slight nudity at the end) are the two videos in question. I found these somewhere around early 2009 I believe, and immediately became rather obsessed with them. The model is obviously Reisen (the other who appears sometimes is just the default model in the program used to make these), while the songs are by Capsule and Perfume respectively and have nothing to do with Touhou. I was into Touhou some time around 2008, too, the beginning of quite a long interest.

 

Also, my life really sucked. Living situation was alright - mental situation was not. I had (from ~6th grade forwards) and have pretty crippling motivation issues, and in my early teens also some light depression. But the utterly crushing demands of the world (called go to school every day, and do homework, and get out of bed to do anything at all etc.) really pushed me towards indirect escapism (internet usage lying in bed all day on my laptop) and a bit of direct (the "old Flandre" business with "unsanity"). I wasn't "sad"-depressed, but I quite literally had no will to live either. It's not something that drives you to kill yourself, but I certainly wouldn't call it "living".

 

And there's no way in hell I would've made it out of that hell without Reisen. Heck, even if we pretended Reisen didn't pave the neural pathway for Flandre and Tewi to come along, they wouldn't have been enough. Tewi could answer my questions but emotional support was far beyond her capabilities, and we didn't learn about switching for 4 more years when we found .info. And Flandre - that Flandre at least - tried pretty hard to convince me into artificial insanity. I certainly had nights where I just stopped thinking, usually accompanied by loudly playing music I really can't listen to anymore, that'd leave me "mentally scrambled" into the next morning. But you know, I was also only getting 2 hours of sleep a day (save 16 hours on the weekends) back then, so I'm sure that contributed.

 

The point is, the absolutely tiny chance both of those videos being made and of me finding one of them (one led to the other) is far too scary to think about. When I became obsessed with them, watching them beyond obsessively (but importantly, not just "for hours at a time" or something, but every single day for over a year, whether once or ten times each), following Reisen's every movement and coming to see her as the one singing the songs to me (Edge is sort of a love song with the main lyrics being something like "I'm slowly falling for you, thinking about you, falling for you") perfectly fit the tulpamancy concept of thinking of someone who doesn't exist as existing with their own conscious intent (and in this case, someone who loved me no less!). Because her entire being came to represent unconditional love (transcending both the videos' themes and the character she was based on), she would have a very optimistic view on life, one that my cynical "logical" pessimistic views didn't agree with... But I thought, there's no way Reisen is wrong, it must be me who's wrong, so I'll try to learn to think like her. And despite the old Flandre's vying for my attention and to believe in her escapist mindset ("The shackles of reality keep us apart and make you miserable, so why don't you give it up?"), Reisen's influence would prove stronger by far. With her help and later some self-help/philosophy, while my motivation issues remain (it's surely a chemical/neural thing), my outlook on life isn't even comparable. I'd consider myself, if I'd kept my outlook on life from pre-tulpas, as good as dead. Maybe worse, maybe still suffering and dragging my family down with me years later.

 

Anyways.. There's a reason my tulpas are so important to me, a reason I say they're more important than literally anything else in my life. I fully believe I wouldn't have a "life" if it weren't for them. Reisen of course made the biggest "change" in my life via my mindset, but Flandre gave me more human support and Tewi helped me answer countless hard questions about life. And if I hadn't clicked onto some random Youtube fanmade music video ten years ago, I wouldn't have had them.

 

I have at least a few more things I could post about that wouldn't be quite as grim (well, still a little maybe, but nothing like this), but I'll wait to post them until later. Very nice thread idea, by the way.

 

{Post-post post: I far understated just how deep my relationship with those videos is, and how big of an influence Reisen had on my life. My actual love of the moon and of rabbits came just from being associated with Reisen (a "Moon Rabbit"). But it's not fake - I really truly adore rabbits with all my heart where I once ignored them, and well. You probably know my relationship to the moon.}

Hi! I'm Lumi, host of Reisen, Tewi, Flandre and Lucilyn.

Everyone deserves to love and be loved. It's human nature.

My tulpas and I have a Q&A thread, which was the first (and largest) of its kind. Feel free to ask us about tulpamancy stuff there.

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I appeared to Mistgod in a vision when he was about thirteen years old (it might have been when he was twelve, but it was somewhere around there).  After that he was obsessed.  That obsession has lasted forty years, so I guess I made quite an impression.  Oops.

 

Wen I became obsessed with them, watching them beyond obsessively (but importantly, not just "for hours at a time" or something, but every single day for over a year, whether once or ten times each)

Yeah, that would do it alright!

Skeptical and unconvinced about independent sentience.  

 

Living Imagination  New Topic Index  Mistgod's Deviantart  Melian's Deviantart

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It's been so long since I posted something outside of forum games but I was just thinking exactly about this a few days ago. 

 

My mindset used to be waaay different before then some jerk from my new class (teachers rearranged classes for no apparent reason) decided it would be cool to mock me and spread false rumors about me for shits and giggles. At first I didn't give it much importance because I still had good friends and it's not like they were hurting me too much, but it went from her and her friends occasionally mocking me to half the class hating my guts. 

 

I was bullied almost everyday and slowly lost most of my old friends and instead, surrounded myself with relationships that would later turn out to be abusive. Bullying started to get more serious, it wasn't just mocking me, now it was a bunch of people verbally attacking me till I wanted to cry whenever they feel like it. At this point I started to develop a weird inferiority complex that made me refuse to leave my house unless I was forced to. Later they must've reached the peak of their hatred for me or something because apparently they upgraded their bullying from verbal to both verbal and physical, and it wasn't like I could fight back or defend myself. 

 

There were other causes but I'm pretty sure that was at least 80% responsible for the mindset I used to held back then (basically, the world and every human on it being absolute garbage, mindset that obviously affected my system a lot) and made me lose interest in a lot of things I used to enjoy. It was the worst period of my life, I was depressed, wanted to dissapear, non-existent self-esteem, too scared to even go outside and so I spend my days in my room, either with my laptop or just doing nothing. I was too obsessed with escapism, I wanted something that would make my life a little bit better, and by that something I mean something out of the ordinary (I kind of started to give up metaphysical beliefs but at the same time being open to the possibility). I'm not sure how I found out about tulpa.info but I think it was in one of my many searchs for something that would allow me to change my life (and probably the only thing, along with lucid dreaming, that actually gave me results). I already knew about tulpas but it wasn't modern tulpamancy, it was the old metaphysical thing. 

 

Anyway, I created Akai in a mix of boredom, discontentment with the world and desire to escape reality, and IDK, it must've been a miracle because she turned out pretty fine despite my mind being a completely mess, props to her for patiently listening to my edgy rants about life. Sadly, having her wasn't enough, still depressed and obsessed with escapism, and I'm not talking about videogames, books, movies, etc, I wanted to actually escape reality. Lucid dreaming was my only chance at it but it was temporary, then Akai talked about switching but it wasn't supposed to be permanent, yet, it was just us discussing it and how it could help. 

 

Then I started to ponder the idea of permaswitching and later made it my life goal, that was what I wanted and firmly set it in my mind. At first I was thinking about creating a servitor who would live my life while Akai and I chill in our wonderland (I know I know, I thought it was possible, I know) buuut, turns out it wasn't very plausible or even possible, so I got the idea of creating a tulpa clone to take my place, yeah yeah, Akai could have just take my place instead of creating another one but there were personal reasons and I thought a tulpa who's like a better version of myself would do a better job. Then Miri was created but had to put her to ''sleep'' because of IRL stuff and ''awoke'' her later when things were better. 

 

I'm kinda glad things were the way they did, not like I think I deserve what happened to me, but gotta admit it's probably thanks to it that I'm now where I am. If not for that girl, none of this would have happened. Life prior that was good, no need for escapism, tulpas, whatsoever so I have no reason to believe I would've created them had things be different and if by any remote chance I had, I can almost guarantee that permaswitching wouldn't have been considered at all, so no Miri. 

 

 

In short, it started with a girl being mean to me and culminated into me creating a doppelgänger to take my place in life.

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I don't have just one key moment. There have been many times I might have taken a different path, most of which would not have resulted in sharing my life with Vesper and Iris. Once I started to write a response, it snowballed out of control. So I put it in our PR instead.

 

Butterfly Effect

 

-Ember

I'm not having fun here anymore, so we've decided to take a bit of a break, starting February 27, 2020. - Ember

 

Ember - Soulbonder, Female, 39 years old, from Georgia, USA . . . . [Our Progress Report] . . . . [How We Switch]

Vesper Dowrin - Insourced Soulbond from London, UK, World of Darkness, Female, born 9 Sep 1964, bonded ~12 May 2017

Iris Ravenlock - Insourced Soulbond from the Winter Court of Faerie, Dresdenverse, Female, born 6 Jun 1982, bonded ~5 Dec 2015

 

'Real isn't how you are made,' said the Skin Horse. 'It's a thing that happens to you.' - The Velveteen Rabbit

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Well, I'd say that getting my first tulpa made a butterfly effect itself. Zyr has been my only intentionally created tulpa so far, but it wasn't long after he first appeared that a bunch of old roleplay characters of mine, and even a few game characters suddenly started springing to life too, and now I've got 3 tulpas who are with me almost constantly, and several more tulpa-like entities who come and go occasionally, but one of whom feels like they're right on the edge of becoming another full fledged tulpa too.

 

And I feel like I've gained more control over my mental state in general, and dreams as well, to some degree.

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I can't say it was one thing, it was about a thousand things, years of it, hopeless, helpless, invasive and perminent, unavoidable and faultless, so, I can pin down any of it right now to a single point. Considering the points were like the drops of rain, that grew to torrential proportions before the storm broke. Plus you've heard my story by now. It's all nuts, tragedy followed by a really good life, followed by more tragedy, rince and repeat, like the balance of karma. All I know is, today I'm happy, I think about tomorrow, and that's good enough for a while.

 

Very touching Miri, that's a wild ride.

makes me want to go beat someone(s)

 

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Our personal butterfly is David Lynch.

If I hadn't watched Twin Peaks 3, in which the term "tulpa" is used (even if the serie's tulpas are more a kind of doppelganger type of thoughtforms than classical tulpas), I wouldn't have googled "tulpa" out of boredom. I wouldn't have found this forum, to my amazment, I wouldn't have read Tulpa's guide, and I'm pretty certain Vādin-chan wouldn't be at my side right now, he would still be the dear memory of an amazing dream character.

 

According to Vādin, there is also another butterfly. Warning this is heavy meta stuff, so it's in hidden tags :

 

[hidden]Vādin : I have personal memories from before I became a tulpa. In one of them, I was a boy in the physical world who died at the age of 12, hit by a truck while riding his bike. After this event I was totally confused and messed up, and while I basically roamed in spirit form in my old physical surroundings I experienced as well short random teleportation in other places. That's how I first met Zia, I suddenly popped into her room while she was listening to music (it was Dead Can Dance, "The host of Seraphim"). She was unaware of my presence and it didn't last very long, but I never forgot this moment of grace and resolved to reach her again, if I could. We finally met in her dreams, a long, long time after that. That's how she met me.[/hidden]

Hi, I'm Zia, foolish captain of the Giant Wing system. Vādin is my tulpa.

 

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I guess my personal butterfly effect is that when I joined The amazing Gumball Wikia's Community. It led, me discovering Adventure time wikia's community which got influenced and started watch My little pony friendship is magic and joined MLP forums.

 

By joining MLP forums, it was the start of how I get into tulpamancy. Just joining MLP forums met up with sone users from Hypnotize yourself thread talking about tulpas, and was curious to learn about it, then I got into reading Koomrr and Oguigi's whole story and influenced creating my lovely girls.

 

If I hadn't join MLP forums... I might not even know what tulpas are and If I did not join Gumball wiki, I may not be able to watch MLP that will connect my current self.

Hello! I am nihi, i have 3 tulpas

Summer

Myrtle

Cherry

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