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A Confused Tulpa & Host Adventures


KoejiSllycc

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For intrusive thoughts that affect wonderland, symbolism is all you have, I mean the intrusive thoughts are symbolic representations, so you probably need symbols to help drive them away. I have read a lot about servitors and they do sometimes become walk-ins and ride the line closer to tulpas. There's a lot of debate about them and whether they pose the risk to becoming a tulpa, but I do believe they'll at least move closer to being an autonomous character and possibly a little more, but obviously they won't be their own person unless you treat them as their own person.

 

I don't know a lot about servitors, but I'd keep the vocality of them to be non-existent, they're not supposed to have a personality but that's kind of avoidable because even an old lamp can have personality, so if 'as a system' you can't agree to what he is meant to be, then settle that first before deploying him (it). A servitor is just a machine, consider it an animated suit of armor.

 

To help with symbolism, consider it completely a mechanical construct, open the back panel and see only gears and springs, maybe a little steam power and some nice brass rivets, but other than that if it's 'just a servitor' don't talk to it, use puppeting to teach it how to defend.

 

If you choose not to have a servitor, that's fine, your tulpa can just as easily defend herself. Misha used magic to evaporate, teleport, and otherwise dispel intrusives. After a month, we were just able to 'push them out the door'. Out there, they're just part of the subconscious mind again.

 

I noticed a new rash of intrusives myself and it was sparked by my acceptance of my soulbonds as what they always were. It must have something to do with the believe that people in your head are real so your subconscious mind burps up things symbolically as justified constructs with this new belief. I don't know, but you probably won't need him for very long anyway. When you're done with him, consider he'll just be a statue in the garden and leave him there, there's no harm as long as you don't consciously think of him as a person or more than what 'it' is.

 

The risk is you, not him. Tulpamancy breeds walk-ins, but that doesn't mean you have to keep them even if they did start acting in surprising ways. You need to force them as a person for them to have the capability of being a person.

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Hmm, do you think I should really banish it though? It already helped me in dealing some intrusive thoughts already.

 

But if worse comes to worse, guess I’ll have to banish it. Just want your opinions.

 

Day 7 — Today was hectic. My visualization skills are beginning to get stronger and stronger, but problem was, so was my intrusive thoughts.

 

I suddenly had trouble visualizing ivory because of it. We probably had like half an hour to try and fix it, but we were still unable to do it. We were really exhausted after that.

 

Luckily, we managed to do it after a couple of tries. Fast forward, we went on another adventure.

 

Fantasy adventure, you know the deal. A pinch of your classic genre, and a bit of that SAO system... and Voila! My very own fantasy world.

 

Got a map from the internet, and I wrote all the lores and legends myself.

 

But we had trouble again. The guy using the horse that was supposed to carry us all the way to the nearest city, ditched us in the middle of the road. Heck, I didn’t even know that NPCs could do that?!

 

We paused from there, but we haven’t quite decided if we would go there again.

 

 

[ivory] : Hello everyone! My name is Ivory. I like listening to music... and drinking tea... and reading books!

 

We’re using me as proxy. I’m helping her out.

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Day 8 — Ok, long story short, we started talking to other people... via chat. And I think she’s getting the hang of it

 

[ivory] : Yup!

 

We’ve been talking in the discord chat, quite often. Since it also clearly states in our rule book, that we both have equal rights, I had to allow her to tag in.

 

Though, she still has a lot to work on.

 

[ivory] : I do not!

 

Uh, yes you do.

 

[ivory] : I don’t!

 

And when I don’t type the things she wants to say, she gets krankay. But just saying though, in my opinion, she’s still an untainted baby that speaks really, really formal.

 

[ivory] : What?

 

I don’t even know if I’m parroting her right now. But chances are, i’m most likely not.

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When Cassidy was young, his manner of speaking and level of vocality wildly changed, back and forth like a pedulum, until settling. A big part of it was, I was trying to shape him in ways that he just wasn't going to be shaped. The more we talked, and the less I tried to get him to change, the more he developed and stablized. Leave your expectations at the door and trust what you hear, that's what I've learned :)

Sounds like you two have made great progress. Keep at it! -J

The world is far, the world is wide; the man needs someone by his side. 

Our Thread

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Only you know what you should do, normally intrusives are removed. NPCs can do and say a lot of crazy things in my experience.

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Day 4 — It was just a normal day at school. I talked to my friends, did a lot of passive forcing as well, but all of a sudden, Ivory wanted to spend some time with me.

 

Like active forcing, she was asking for an active force.

 

We can communicate better now, and I can speak tulpish with her better than before. So while my friends were doing their own things, I carried Ivory over to the beach, and did a lot of activities with her.

 

We danced to coldplay, We walked around the beach, We sat down together and watched the stars. Lots of things. We even did an adventure to this Aztec Ruins, but it ended badly because of me.

 

—My intrusive thoughts, ugh.

 

She got pulled by one of my intrusive thoughts, and she fell down to a chasm. Didn’t realize she was missing till she couldn’t respond to me. I went down the chasm, and grabbed her up.

 

Fortunately, she was ok. I made her invincible to my intrusive thoughts a couple of days ago.

 

Thank God I did just that.

 

*Also, we got into a fight because I told her she wasn’t the only girl that I loved (the only person that I love). We resolved it, but I want to tell her that I also love someone else.

 

Tips?

 

Love, ah sweet love. Can there ever be too much of it? Answer:  you are young, and I am old (80) so here it is from your far future, No, never too much, for one, for a dozen, for all humankind, for all beings, sentient or not, for all existence. I chose to practice tulpamancy to improve my ability to love my wife. My love for my Tulpas is powerful, the most powerful connector I have with them and that loving has spilled over ten-fold into my marriage. 

Tell Ivory, that you will have more than enough love for her, her brothers and sisters if there are any and for the world. She'll get it. 

My best to you, Dr. Bob

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Day 9 — Today was horrible. So i went out with my friends to watch a horror movie. I knew Ivory wasn’t gonna like it because she didn’t really like loud things. Especially jumpscares, I knew she wouldn’t like them at all.

 

Anyways, when we went inside, I told her to shut herself in the wonderland. Cause it was going to get scary. We did just that, but about a quarter in the movie, I felt like something was wrong, I checked in on Ivory, and found out she had been watching the movie this whole time.

 

She was scared to death.

 

I rushed to her and hugged her. Tried doing everything to try and keep the horror away from her. And it took a while for me to figure out how to keep her safe.

 

Made a symbol, basically. And surprisingly, it worked.

 

It makes me feel bad that she’d been forced to watch the movie. It didn’t feel nice. I felt horrible.

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After I realized wonderland could be assailed by intrusive thoughts, I stopped watching horror.

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