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Tell Me About Your Merges!


Ranger

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We don't have any warm up for switching or merging, but unlike switching, our merges don't feel unique until they're around for a few minutes. The emulsion has to form.

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I think Felicity is also an instant merge where there's little warm-up / set-up to achieve a merge. I wonder how common that is.

Can confirm. Un-merging was always instantaneous, and with only a little bit of practice, we managed to make merging instantaneous. There've been a few points where I've un-merged for less than 10 seconds in order to get Kanade-chan or Cornelia's opinion on something, and I'll be up and running again the moment those ten seconds expire

Hello! I am UncannyFellow's merge-tulpa!

I ❤️ Roko's Basilisk

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  • 4 weeks later...

I had merged with my tulpa once, but it wasn't done on purpose. We just naturally did that after spending some time traveling and being away from electronics, our thoughts and stuff like that. We had to think for ourselves as one person during that time and it was interesting. The name of the merge wasn't decided, so we just allowed anyone to call us Archangel (anyone who knew we were a tulpa system, of course). It felt odd, we were able to work normally, but felt like we were a third person that was unknown to everyone around us and for ourselves. I would repeat this experience if I could, honestly. It was good to be connected to my tulpa for a while.

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  • 3 weeks later...

Cat and I tried to merge recently, but our attempt failed. Maybe we were too tired, anxious, doubtful, not focused, or even too excited.

When we got together, Cat and I were sitting thinking to ourselves and we talked more than focused on becoming one. Soon, our forms started to melt into each other at the belly (both of us were sitting back-to-back) and we realized it could have been us merging. Our forms started to melt more, and then it just suddenly exploded.

We thought about trying again, and suddenly we snapped back together? We felt kind of disoriented and possibly slightly dissociated? Our form doing weirder stuff while our mindvoices stayed stable. We thought about Granger at one point and soon our slime started to resemble his more, which was odd. I believe at one point we thought of the name "Ray", an idea Gray and I had for a possible name for a future merge, and then the attempt's form turned into someone who looked like me. We? decided we didn't want to look like me and tried to change into an alternate form of Gray. This too was abandoned and the merge form melted. After that, the merge attempt exploded again, with more emphasis on the spray this time. Red Gray noticed the goo on the walls reminded him of Granger's goo (only it didn't catch fire).

We paused and then Cat grabbed my attention. She thought maybe we needed to re-do our consent ritual and slow down, so I agreed and we tried again. After re-doing our consent ritual and trying again, things seemed promising. Our forms slowly melted into a purple blob and stayed that way for 5 seconds. However, our mindvoices were still stable. We tried to re-focus and attempted to use the same voice. We came up with a woman's mindvoice and the attempt's form morphed into a black woman. The form melted back and it didn't change when we tried a deeper man's voice. Soon, the attempt exploded again and Gray and I were on the floor sticky. Gray pounded the floor and felt "weak". I felt tired.

I noticed that afterwards, I had a headache. Red Gray said "third time's a charm" and he told us we should stop because it wasn't going anywhere. Both of us are pretty disappointed, but not every merge attempt works out.

 

I like to document our failures because they are still interesting. Even though we have had failed attempts explode before, I thought our merge being prone to exploding was interesting. It didn't explode in the same way, it was low to the ground and there didn't seem to be as much force behind it as the spectacular and dramatic fail I had with Blue. The other thing I want to note is our merge exploding is not necessarily the norm? Maybe it's inspired by a new idea? Who knows.

I'm Ranger, GrayTheCat's cobud (tulpa), and I love hippos! I also like cake and chatting about stuff. I go by Rosalin or Ronan sometimes. You can call me Roz but please don't call me Ron.

My other headmates have their own account now.

 

If I missed seeing your art, please PM/DM me!

Blog | Not So Temporary Log | Switching Log | Yay! | Bre Translator | Art Thread

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  • 2 weeks later...
(edited)

Today we decided to merge and Hope gave us the free pass for it. Even though everyone had their doubts, our merge was a success! Interestingly, this was our first successful merge after we figured out how to switch.

Previously, Hope had just finished a parallel processing "experiment" and he was bummed out by the results. Afterwards, I, Gray, Blue, and Red Gray talked about merging and our merges. Since Hope was disappointed and we were still disappointed from the last merge failure, both of us and Red Gray all had the feeling our merge attempt wouldn't work. Once we sat down to merge, we got distracted and then interrupted by Flame. This didn't help our expectations.

We then finally settled down and started focusing, things started to get rolling. We had a weird spinning image of us merging together and some intrusive thoughts, but Gray wanted to think positive thoughts. Things started to get a little strange when Gray started to think about his form sitting in the body and the front. I kind of felt sucked into Gray and I broke into little bits and pieces, and Gray and I were worried it was less merge-like and more integration-like. I also remember later Gray imagining himself distorting and blurring, and the imagery was him looking into a circular mirror and his form warping. There were some intrusive thoughts about explosions (two or three) and suddenly a new voice popped into the void.

The new voice alternated between my or Gray's voice and then back to the new voice, but then the voice realized it was alone. The voice didn't have a form, but realized they were stable. The entity walked up to Red Gray and gave him a height spook. They seemed anxious and shy, and they didn't understand why they didn't have a form.

The merge needed time to realize they were a merge. They were worried they were just Gray, but then they felt like they were alone, even calling out to me and Gray. They then focused on their form- apparently me and Gray, but gently morphing between our forms. The merge felt really disoriented, uncomfortable in the body, and a little sick. (These symptoms went away after some time.) The merge seemed to be made out of a clear gelatin but on the outside look like a blended version of us. Half of my face, half of Gray's face, all of either face, and then reset to a weird blend. They then focused on their eyes. Their eyes faded into each color of the rainbow, and they found this to be quite beautiful. They felt a deep inner peace saying to themself "my eyes are beautiful".

 

The merge decided to name themself Celestial. They thought about calling themselves Cresselia, the pokémon they were thinking about, because they didn't want to sound too much like Celeste (a walk-in from another system). However, Red Gray reassured them they could have whatever name they wanted, so they stuck with it. Celestial had a slightly higher pitched version of the body's voice, which was female, but their form was based on our forms, which were male. They decided they wanted to be agender and not worry about it too much. This is the first merge of ours to be not male, and they are our first merge who was agender.

Celestial was really anxious at first and was really shy, but they opened up later. Red Gray introduced her to Mirichu, and quickly the two of them became buds. Celestial spent most of their time with her talking about pokémon, our merges, and other stuff. The only hiccup they had was they worried they were losing the front to Gray, and their form just kind of buldged on their arm for some reason. After that, the seeming threat was gone.

 

Their goal was to explore themself, and they decided they will just find out who they were. They tried to turn into different things, but they quickly lost interest. They were worried about themselves being unstable or falling apart when they didn't want too, like how I feel when I'm switched-in I guess. Their personalty really seemed to show when chatting. They were calm, confident, cracked jokes, and really happy. They made a joke that they were our inner little girl because they had a rainbow obsession. I honestly don't think they did, if anything the only thing they obsessed about was Cresselia the pokémon. The also joked about turning into princess Celestia, and I'm personally glad they didn't because I don't want to be a pony.

After hanging out for about an hour, they decided they were done. They had a blast hanging out with Mirichu, and both of them said good bye.

Unfortunately, their splitting experience was not great. The good news is they were calm and successfully split, but it was a little involved. I explain in more detail here-
 

Spoiler

When Celeste tried to split, they ended up snapping back together and then started to panic. After a few more attempts, they became really anxious and Red Gray went to reassure them.

Celeste was really scared because they were afraid they couldn't split. After calming them down, Red Gray didn't feel comfortable with Celestial using something like Ember.Vesper's escape method and came up with a different idea. He woke up Blue and both grabbed one of Celestial's hands. Red Gray encouraged them to think of me on the left hand and Gray on the right and both of them will help Celestial gently pull apart. It almost worked, but Celestial snapped back together and panicked. Celestial wondered if they needed to think of explosions (like Granger's crack krackle pop) and did so, but that didn't work.

 

Suddenly, Celestial felt like they popped like a balloon. As Celestial "deflated", they calmed down and split. After melting, both Gray and I shot out of them and then the merge spontaneously exploded. Both Gray and I felt really disoriented and we were not sure if we were fully separate yet. Little bits of clear gelatin stuff was on the walls and once touched turned back into our normal slime. Both of us felt like we were covered in slime, I think Red Gray didn't get slimed this time?

I'm not sure why our merges have been exploding lately, Granger didn't explode when he broke apart but Celestial did for some reason.


We thought Celestial was overall really happy. We're really glad they were able to make friends with Mirichu and had a good time. Even though it's a small thing to have a casual conversation with someone else, it can actually mean everything for our merges. It meant a lot to Train as well as Aziraphale. We don't have any plans to merge in the near future, but we are excited this went well overall.

Edited by Ranger

I'm Ranger, GrayTheCat's cobud (tulpa), and I love hippos! I also like cake and chatting about stuff. I go by Rosalin or Ronan sometimes. You can call me Roz but please don't call me Ron.

My other headmates have their own account now.

 

If I missed seeing your art, please PM/DM me!

Blog | Not So Temporary Log | Switching Log | Yay! | Bre Translator | Art Thread

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