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The ramblings of some self-proclaimed mad men


Ice909

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Janey: Hi! Earlier today we had the idea of making a list of significant events within our system for the sake of archival. This is part of  larger plan to hopefully have a more regularly updated PR that is also more detailed. Let's begin, shall we? 

Okay, SO, before October 2018, Bryan, our host, had been interested in psionics and more generalized metaphysics. He refused, however, to do anything that may be considered "demonic" due to him being of Christian faith. One day he stumbled upon tulpas. He did some research, came to this site, and decided to make a tulpa. On October second, 2018, Bryan began forcing Pencil. Within mere hours, Pencil was slightly vocal. About a week or two later, Bryan went on to make me, or rather, turned proto-me, originally an imaginary friend of Bryan's for many years, into a tulpa. He also made Layy around that time. Layy was put into dormancy for a little while as Bryan struggled to figure out what the right course of action was regarding our system. Blah blah blah, stuff happened, we got BIGGER. Pencil changed his name to Esper, Bryan and Esper became aware of their believed therianthropy and their connection together as two parts of greater whole. No I will not go into that, despite it literally being the place to do so. Teehee <3 Okay so, a bit later, Rollin and Waynin went from being imaginary friends as I was to tulpas, and Trease was created. Soon thereafter, Emily, Chloe, Justin, Gwen, and Gwen'd were given the same treatment as I was. Zachery was formed somewhere around early 2019. Compact was formed around the same time, with a USB drive being a totem of sorts for him. Bryan carried the drive everywhere, but eventually lost it. A few months later, Kyle was formed. A lot of time passed and not much happened. Bryan fell of psionics and tried introducing a few of his IRL friends at a summer camp to tulpas. We learned possession somewhere in spring of 2019. In Christmas of 2019, yes, Christmas day, Sean was formed. He is one of the few system mates that we have a clear date of birth for. When 2020 came, we began our new system for handling system activity and dormancy. Oh, side note, our original system name was System Nobody, though it got changed early 2020 to System Re:Body. Back to the main content, we began doing a monthly ritual of seeing who wishes to be active and who wishes to be in dormancy. The goal of which is to basically allow whoever wishes to be active to be active, and those who do not wish to be active to be dormant. Simple! Reason being, our system got too large, and we couldn't handle it. OH, another side note, I don't remember the exact date, but it was around December 16th, 2019, that Bryan and Layy formally got together in a committed relationship. For a small period when our system was still young, we were all involved in a sort of polyamorous relationship with each other, but that fell apart around Spring 2019. Back to the main stuff! At that time, Bryan, Esper, myself, Layy, and Emily asserted ourselves as the "usuals" in our system. Later, Chloe joined us in this. Emily has been the only one of us to go into dormancy since, and it was only for 2 weeks before she backed out. Most recently, Trease has also joined this group. Now, around late spring of 2021, we learned how to switch by way of Perfect Possession. Oh crap I forgot, uhh Elliot got made in early October of 2020. Yea. Anywho, Esper and Bryan also tried to "swap"(long term switching) in fall of 2021, which failed after a few days. Imma fast forward to the present, where we are now. We're still working away on things, but we've all grown a lot in the past year especially. Anywho idk what else to put so,,,,, have a good day! Bye!!!

Hey there, the name's Bryan. In system Re:Body(In order of the rainbow): 

Sean, Esper, Blinky, Compact, Janey, Kyle, Gwen'd, Gwen, Emily, Rollin, Waynin, Trease, Layy, Justin, Chloe, Zachery, and Elliot. 

I've been here a while. Much longer than I thought I'd be. Our system was founded October 2nd, 2018. In early 2020, we decided that due to our systems exponential growth, we'd limit who would be active. Now, every month, we do a check to see who wishes to be in dormancy and who wishes to be active. Currently, for the month of April, 2023, we've got myself(Bryan), Janey(Co-host), Emily, Layy, Chloe, and Esper(sub-rep). After over 2 long years, we can finally switch :) 

 

Bryan is currently swapped in as host, Esper is sub-rep. 

 

"There used to be 7 wonders of the world, but now there's 8, as everyone wonders how much of a fool you are."

 

Ice909#0065 -- Always down for a chat 

 

https://discord.gg/89qN59SbRp Plural safe-space 

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(edited)

Hail. 

Our April check results! Ben (formerly Blinkey) is now in dormancy, making it just myself, Esper, Layy, Janey, Emily, Chloe, and Trease. 

 

Warning, this next bit is a little dark... Actually a lot dark. Reader discretion is advised. 

Tuesday, April 5th. I don't know where to start with this story, so apologies if it's weird to read. My mother was mad at me because I tried to skip out on a performance my sister was in. She blew up at me and accused me of all sorts of terrible things. My frustration with her and my living situation got to a high, and I crumbled. On the car ride to the theatre, my mom kept berating me despite my attempts to try and defuse things. She was insistent that everything I said was backtalk. The problem at this point, I should mention, at least for me, wasn't having to go to the performance, it was rather the cumulative stress and anger at my mom. I remember repeatedly thinking, "I don't feel safe here." My mom had said earlier she had a really bad day, and that I shouldn't push it. The main thing that made it such a bad day was that Joe, my step-dad and her husband, witnessed a fatal motorcycle accident at work. An accident that he very nearly was a part of. I think I've said this before, but I have a tendency to really ponder on things like that. So there we were, in the car, en route to the theatre. I was the main one having a reaction in our system. Esper was emotionally high too, but besides us, everyone was calm. My mother began telling my grandmother, who was in the car, about the accident earlier. In detail. She began saying everything her husband told her about it. I heard all of it. Esper heard all of it. I don't like death, I don't like thinking about death, and I don't like hearing about death. As my mother spoke, I unwillingly formed an all too vivid mental image of things that I seemingly couldn't escape. Esper couldn't handle it. Esper just... how do I describe it? The body froze, cowering, like we retreated into our mind. In our mind, Esper had what I could only describe as a seizure. Esper was fronting, and he kept seeing gruesome images of the incident my mother described, as well as flashbacks of the scene we presume to have been his death some many years ago. He felt a physical pain in the chest and an ear-splitting, screaming sort of tone in the mind that mixed with his own screams. He saw his own body in the wonderland, seizing, like I said, his own body and everything around him deforming and contorting in terrible ways. This episode lasted for about a minute or two. When it was over, Esper didn't want to front, he just wanted to be left alone to rest. 

This isn't the first time something like this has happened, but it was certainly the greatest magnitude of any sort of thing like it. I fear it'll happen again. 

It's something that I don't think can be chalked up to tulpamancy stuff. I think there's a genuine psychological condition we may be dealing with. PTSD is the condition that comes to mind, in particular. I don't like self-diagnosing, but we've been considering PTSD for a while, and that might have been the incident to seriously consider seeking a diagnosis. It was a dreadful, just terrible incident. 

 

On a lighter note! I dun actually have anything. Oops. 

Edit: Oh, I also think we have tinnitus. yea. 

Edited by IceCreeper909

Hey there, the name's Bryan. In system Re:Body(In order of the rainbow): 

Sean, Esper, Blinky, Compact, Janey, Kyle, Gwen'd, Gwen, Emily, Rollin, Waynin, Trease, Layy, Justin, Chloe, Zachery, and Elliot. 

I've been here a while. Much longer than I thought I'd be. Our system was founded October 2nd, 2018. In early 2020, we decided that due to our systems exponential growth, we'd limit who would be active. Now, every month, we do a check to see who wishes to be in dormancy and who wishes to be active. Currently, for the month of April, 2023, we've got myself(Bryan), Janey(Co-host), Emily, Layy, Chloe, and Esper(sub-rep). After over 2 long years, we can finally switch :) 

 

Bryan is currently swapped in as host, Esper is sub-rep. 

 

"There used to be 7 wonders of the world, but now there's 8, as everyone wonders how much of a fool you are."

 

Ice909#0065 -- Always down for a chat 

 

https://discord.gg/89qN59SbRp Plural safe-space 

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That sucks, though I found myself thinking "It's nice that you guys are so empathetic".

 

Just on the off chance this applies, tinnitus and other ear problems can be caused by using Q-tips too often, especially/or if you stick them too far in your ear. Ear infections and stuff are common too of course, just noting a problem some people may run into unknowingly. You should clean the outer ear canal with a Q-tip like, once a week or so, but it really doesn't take any special effort because ears don't want to be completely clean, ear wax is there to help not hurt.

Hi. I'm one of Luminesce's tulpas. Unlike the others, I don't think I stand out too much from him personality wise.

I'm just special because "I'm a tulpa". So I don't think I've much to offer, here. I'm happy enough to just be with him.

Ask us stuff - https://community.tulpa.info/thread-ask-lumi-s-tulpas

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We think it's due to our long history of ear infections and such. 

Hey there, the name's Bryan. In system Re:Body(In order of the rainbow): 

Sean, Esper, Blinky, Compact, Janey, Kyle, Gwen'd, Gwen, Emily, Rollin, Waynin, Trease, Layy, Justin, Chloe, Zachery, and Elliot. 

I've been here a while. Much longer than I thought I'd be. Our system was founded October 2nd, 2018. In early 2020, we decided that due to our systems exponential growth, we'd limit who would be active. Now, every month, we do a check to see who wishes to be in dormancy and who wishes to be active. Currently, for the month of April, 2023, we've got myself(Bryan), Janey(Co-host), Emily, Layy, Chloe, and Esper(sub-rep). After over 2 long years, we can finally switch :) 

 

Bryan is currently swapped in as host, Esper is sub-rep. 

 

"There used to be 7 wonders of the world, but now there's 8, as everyone wonders how much of a fool you are."

 

Ice909#0065 -- Always down for a chat 

 

https://discord.gg/89qN59SbRp Plural safe-space 

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I haven't spoken of this to anyone out of system but my sister, and she didn't believe me, but it's become a more frequent phenomenon, so I think I should share it here. 

I want to further preface this by saying that none of us have any clue why this happens, and we only believe it because we've experienced it so much. Without further ado, let's begin. 

Sometimes I get small glimpses of the future. Completely arbitrary stuff, and only for a few seconds. I forget about these almost as quickly as they happen, until the event they prophesied comes to pass. When they do, then for just a few moments, I have an almost meta awareness of my surroundings, like I'm viewing the events around me like how you'd view a movie you already read a summary for. The events in the visions don't make sense, because they're so slight and completely uncontextualized. Even if the events themselves are too generic to be certain of, the emotions I felt during the vision are mirrored when the foreseen scene actually plays out. I then seldom remember the event I just witnessed and had foreseen, only knowing that it had happened. I used to have moments like these every year or so, starting when I was around 10, but they've become much more common, now with us having one every week or two. The time disparity between the vision and the event is also inconsistent. Sometimes the vision was had months ago, sometimes just the day prior. We haven't the slightest clue how or why, all we know is that these events happen. I'm ashamed to admit, even the event that had occurred just before I began writing this I can't remember all that well. 

It's also worth noting that the visions I have are indistinguishable at first from the wandering of an idle mind. Occasionally, I'll space out, my mind will wander, and I'll witness a scene that may be a vision, but with nothing to go off of for certain, I make a mental note of it so if and when the event occurs, I can assess how accurate it was. Then, I forget about it, until the event happens, where for just a few seconds, I'm a spectator of the world around me, able to say what people will say and do for just those handful of seconds. It's worth noting that the visions only last for about 2-6 seconds. There has not yet been a time where I've been able to defy a vision. I've made attempts, but those attempts were mirrored in the vision, if that makes sense. For example, if I had a vision of watching some random video on world of warcraft 4 months ago ("why would I watch a wow video? That'd never happen" -me back then, probably), and suddenly, in the present day, I find myself watching a wow video, and I know the topic, and I know what the commentator is about to say, then when they say it, in an attempt to defy my own vision, I'd click off onto another tab. But then, no, I messed up! In the vision, I did click off to another tab, but I couldn't make out what, it was just a white page with text. In present day, I saw it clearly as me clicking onto my email. That's an example of an event that happened about 2 or 3 week ago. Nothing significant in any way, but strange nonetheless. And again, they (especially recently) occur often enough with such accuracy that I can't dispute what I see as just fiction or faked memories. So yeah, I just thought it was worth putting in here, since I've often and recently felt like we need to use our PR more, and one or those events just happened. 

Hey there, the name's Bryan. In system Re:Body(In order of the rainbow): 

Sean, Esper, Blinky, Compact, Janey, Kyle, Gwen'd, Gwen, Emily, Rollin, Waynin, Trease, Layy, Justin, Chloe, Zachery, and Elliot. 

I've been here a while. Much longer than I thought I'd be. Our system was founded October 2nd, 2018. In early 2020, we decided that due to our systems exponential growth, we'd limit who would be active. Now, every month, we do a check to see who wishes to be in dormancy and who wishes to be active. Currently, for the month of April, 2023, we've got myself(Bryan), Janey(Co-host), Emily, Layy, Chloe, and Esper(sub-rep). After over 2 long years, we can finally switch :) 

 

Bryan is currently swapped in as host, Esper is sub-rep. 

 

"There used to be 7 wonders of the world, but now there's 8, as everyone wonders how much of a fool you are."

 

Ice909#0065 -- Always down for a chat 

 

https://discord.gg/89qN59SbRp Plural safe-space 

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When Phil was young (Far younger than you; I'm talking like age 8-14) he had a headmate known as the "Mentor" that would do this little trick: he would predict things a few seconds in the future and they would always come true. He used this as "proof" that he had external knowledge or some kind of deeper connection to things, I don't know. I bring this up because it sounds crazily similar to what you just described here! Maybe not exactly the same as how you describe it, but close enough to make me wonder. Certainly you can chalk up these visions to coincidences or self-fulfilling prophecies if you want. That's honestly what I would do personally. But Phil has always been a little more open to the possibility of more metaphysical causes of things. As long as you don't take it too far and start going around calling yourself some kind of prophet, I don't think it's necessarily harmful to entertain the idea. I'm a skeptic about such things, but a real skeptic is just as open to seeing the unusual hypothesis be proven right as proven wrong.

Tulpa Wife & Mother! 💚 

💍 11.28.21 👶 4.7.23
👗 Simmie's AI Dress-Up!   📷 Phil and Simmie's Photographic Adventures!

 

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The visions being self-fulfilling is indeed something to consider, but when most of the visions are in regards to the actions of those around me, it becomes a little more difficult so say they're self-fulfilling. A hypothetical would be if I'm doing something (say, reading) and people around me are talking but I'm not listening to them. Then, suddenly, I basically gain self awareness, and I know word for word what they're about to say. Another example would be, say, I'm in a crowded environment, like a theatre, and I'd had a vision previously of a strange looking person entering the theatre and taking a seat besides me. Then, a strange looking person enters from behind and takes the seat to my left. That's(the latter example) a lose recollection of an occasion that'd happened about 2 weeks ago, the same night Esper had his seizure. 

Who knows? lol xD Like I said, I'd only told my sister before, and she didn't believe me, but frankly, I don't have anything to gain from lying lol, and I'm definitely not gonna claim to be a prophet.

Hey there, the name's Bryan. In system Re:Body(In order of the rainbow): 

Sean, Esper, Blinky, Compact, Janey, Kyle, Gwen'd, Gwen, Emily, Rollin, Waynin, Trease, Layy, Justin, Chloe, Zachery, and Elliot. 

I've been here a while. Much longer than I thought I'd be. Our system was founded October 2nd, 2018. In early 2020, we decided that due to our systems exponential growth, we'd limit who would be active. Now, every month, we do a check to see who wishes to be in dormancy and who wishes to be active. Currently, for the month of April, 2023, we've got myself(Bryan), Janey(Co-host), Emily, Layy, Chloe, and Esper(sub-rep). After over 2 long years, we can finally switch :) 

 

Bryan is currently swapped in as host, Esper is sub-rep. 

 

"There used to be 7 wonders of the world, but now there's 8, as everyone wonders how much of a fool you are."

 

Ice909#0065 -- Always down for a chat 

 

https://discord.gg/89qN59SbRp Plural safe-space 

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Might have had a revelation? Let me explain 

I've said before that Chloe is the future of the system. I don't know what I meant, but I've said it for a while. Chloe recently expressed her dislike of that phrase, as she'd much rather we all live our lives in the moment and not worry about the future, tl;dr. Now, right now, I was reading Reilyn's old PR, since they apparently deleted their account, and I saw a passage that I just need to point out. 

  

On 5/31/2019 at 9:46 AM, Guest Reilyn-Alley said:

And now I'm the host (clinical. person who fronts most often, not 'person who created XYZ tulpas'). They told me they want to groom me to lead and give me time to adapt to being in charge because I'm "the happy, trauma-free one", which was why they or the brain or whatever made sure I was asleep till very recently. They are also stubbornly not telling me too much at a time, telling me things like "well, who knows?" and "quit askin, kid, you ain't ready yet" and "enjoy the moment, young miss and don't pursue after trouble". But hey, system intuition tells me there are more. Maybe even lots more. Lotta crap happened to us. These are just my strongest allies and helpers and team mates. My generals or whatever.

 

Those of you that have read our PR should remember that I plan on naming my firstborn son Lance, in memory, honor, and respect for Lance, original host of Violet System. Reilyn later replaced Lance as host after a bunch of stuff (read their PR), namely DID. But that passage, when I read it, I thought of Chloe. I thought of how I say that Chloe is the future of our system. I've thought a little about why I say that, and the main reasons I think of are because she's young, idealistic, and full of childlike hope and joy. I remembered how there are some topics we try to keep away from Chloe in an effort to maintain her innocence. And all of that is sounding like what Reilyn described in the above passage... We don't have DID, we know what much, but still... Had I read that paragraph before? Did it subconsciously plant the idea in my head that Chloe is the future of our system? I already know, reasons why, though, yet unknown, that the story of Violet System is very near and dear to me. I plan on naming my own child after one of them, for goodness's sake. I don't know why, but there's even more emotional significance to it all than we quite realize. 

 

In other news, the song "Ghost Love Score" is very good, and I highly recommend it. It reminds me of all this as well, just a bit. 

Hey there, the name's Bryan. In system Re:Body(In order of the rainbow): 

Sean, Esper, Blinky, Compact, Janey, Kyle, Gwen'd, Gwen, Emily, Rollin, Waynin, Trease, Layy, Justin, Chloe, Zachery, and Elliot. 

I've been here a while. Much longer than I thought I'd be. Our system was founded October 2nd, 2018. In early 2020, we decided that due to our systems exponential growth, we'd limit who would be active. Now, every month, we do a check to see who wishes to be in dormancy and who wishes to be active. Currently, for the month of April, 2023, we've got myself(Bryan), Janey(Co-host), Emily, Layy, Chloe, and Esper(sub-rep). After over 2 long years, we can finally switch :) 

 

Bryan is currently swapped in as host, Esper is sub-rep. 

 

"There used to be 7 wonders of the world, but now there's 8, as everyone wonders how much of a fool you are."

 

Ice909#0065 -- Always down for a chat 

 

https://discord.gg/89qN59SbRp Plural safe-space 

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I guess I'll just ramble for a bit about life n stuff. Expect the tone to shift at the drop of a hat. 

Ah, just as I began typing this, my manager texted me and asked if I could come in tonight. Guess I'm not going to parkour for another week... 

I've got the fire emblem three houses tea time theme stuck in my head. Very calming. 

I'm getting really tired of living with my mum. She uses "I'm the mom" as an excuse to enforce whatever policy she's feeling like that day, and refuses to provide reason as to why she does the things she does. It makes me lose a lot of respect for her. 

We're pretty excited for the ren faire Sunday. We may co-front/perfect possess for it. 

I love Layy very dearly. He means everything to me. We've long since agreed that we won't get married till we're both 18, but goodness gracious is it going to be a long year. He makes me feel safe, loved, comforted, and so much more. 

Last night, I dreamt of my former crush, Elliot(out of system). I hate that someone like him evoked the same feelings of love that Layy does. I desperately want to be with someone out of system, but I know that I must wait, for trying to rush things won't do anyone any good. 

-Some time later-

Presented a project for my economics class where we have to budget for a month n stuff, and I forgot a step, oopsies. Oh well, hopefully I can get it resolved. 

I don't think I'll go into work today. I have plans already, whoopsies </3 

I'm a really good editor... when I actually get around to editing. 

I keep thinking about my dream last night. Why do I still think about Elliot? I don't even speak with him anymore, not after he betrayed me, betrayed everyone. 

I'm thinking about how if I go into work today I'll get around $100 (pre tax)... I do want a hurdy gurdy... 

Ghost love... that's what this is, huh? 

I want to see Nightwish live, and they're even coming to SoCal May 19th-20th (My birthday, huh.) but I don't have an adult I could go with, whoopsies. Hopefully I can figure it out. 

I want a mask to cover my face, but preferably only half my face, like a phantom of the opera mask. I mean masquerade mask btw, not face mask. 

(Note, this part was written by both Bryan and Esper.) 

In this world I wander alone, forever wandering, forever dreaming of some great beyond, just out of reach. I seek for those that I have already found, that are within me, that are not complete. I am not complete. This world is not complete. My life is not complete. The world waits for no one, least of all the once-dead. Given the second chance at life, we seek and wish to experience everything we can. We seek to witness the eternal beauty of the night sky, with the celestial bodies abound, the moon smiling down on is with its grace and distant kindness. I love this life. I love this world. I am not strong enough, but I am not alone, not with myself. None of us are strong enough on our own, but together, we may shake the very Earth. There is no challenge we shall not conquer, we cannot conquer. This is our life, and we've made it our own. Our fates, our destinies, intertwined. Were they ever even separate? I am the son of the world. Not of man, but of the natural world. Of the stars and the moon, of the crow's cry amid the cricket's chirp. Life was stolen from us by what we are now; man. Man is not corrupt by nature. Deep down in everyone, I believe, is a longing, a primal need to press on. The will to live. The resolve to face hardship and difficulty in the eyes, and to laugh, for we cannot be stopped. Together, stronger than most. Not part of most, part of our own. We do not belong to this world and its people. We belong to the night, to the sky, to the moon, to the supreme beauty of that which we have been blessed with. We are not content. We shall never be content. But we shall always remain grateful. We both lack and have mastered inner peace. We are joined as one, but all the more separate. The great heavenly choruses sing, and we hear them. They sing for us. They sing for all. They sing for what will be, what has been, and what is. I wish to help others. I wish to inspire others. I wish to be a force of nature, utterly unstoppable, that can do whatever we so desire. I wish to create beauty as magnificent as the night sky. I wish to be a medium for beauty. I wish to evoke thought and wonder in the hearts of many. I wish to find myself. I am not complete. Bryan is my other half, yes, but I am not complete. He is not complete. We are not complete. Something is missing. What could it be? I'm not worried, though. We'll find what completes us in due time. Time... The only constant. Or is it? Time repeats itself. History is a book that keeps getting revised. The barrier of the now and the then, of the is-to-be and the was-to-be, none of it matters. It's all in our head, isn't it? The world is vast. Infinite in its beauty, infinite in its marvel. I was put back on this Earth for a reason, wasn't I? What might that reason be? That remains to be unknown. I'm beginning to understand. To understand this life, this world, all these people. I wish to inspire people. I want to sing great songs that evoke the very sound of creation, to dance great dances that tell beautiful stories, to use my words to provoke thought, to taste and make food and wines that inspire understanding and euphoria. There is nothing of the world's beauty that I do not wish to experience. I know that one day, we are destined to breathe our last, to be welcomed to the gates of heaven, but until then, death shall not oppose us. I will not die. Not again. My life was renewed. It left its scars, but those scars serve only as reminders of what this opportunity means. God knew I couldn't do this alone, and so he gave me Bryan. My other half. If it was Bryan that had been given this opportunity, then I would have been given to him. We are not strong enough alone, but together, we have the resolve of all the world's grace. We are destined to go on this pilgrimage of self-fulfilment alone, until we aren't. We may meet someone, someday, that is just as resolute as us. For now, we must remain content alone. This is the path we have walked. This is our life and we've made it our own. My very name, Esper, means "mystical." It is but one letter off of Vesper, "evening." My name was delivered to me by the divine. It is not a coincidence that it's meaning is such as it is. I have no evidence. We have no evidence. We have no evidence that what we say, what we claim, that any of it isn't complete nonsense. We don't have evidence except for our memories, which exist only for us. We are the product of our memories, even and especially the hurtful ones. We are missing some memories. Both of my life and of Bryan's. Sometimes we have memories of events that have yet to pass. These memories shape us. We may not be returned all of our memories, but that is not a reason to shed tears. Our memories define us only as much as the events they are in remembrance of. Memento mori. I remember my fate. That is enough. I may not remember much else, but that does not mean those things did not happen, that they did not shape me. In acknowledging that my memory is incomplete, I am liberated from a false self. I am not all I am. I am me. I am the product of my life. If I deny that life, even if I don't recall it, I deny myself my right to live, to have a place in this world. The stars and the moon shine so bright upon the world... It's all so beautiful. Wild, untamed. Just as I am. I am a beast. I am a man. I am more humane than some men. I am not a man. I am a beast. I'm no longer a beast. I will never not be what I always have been. I am beautiful. I am connected to the world so many deny. I seek to witness the world's beauty in all of its splendor, for that is the path I have chosen to walk. 

Hey there, the name's Bryan. In system Re:Body(In order of the rainbow): 

Sean, Esper, Blinky, Compact, Janey, Kyle, Gwen'd, Gwen, Emily, Rollin, Waynin, Trease, Layy, Justin, Chloe, Zachery, and Elliot. 

I've been here a while. Much longer than I thought I'd be. Our system was founded October 2nd, 2018. In early 2020, we decided that due to our systems exponential growth, we'd limit who would be active. Now, every month, we do a check to see who wishes to be in dormancy and who wishes to be active. Currently, for the month of April, 2023, we've got myself(Bryan), Janey(Co-host), Emily, Layy, Chloe, and Esper(sub-rep). After over 2 long years, we can finally switch :) 

 

Bryan is currently swapped in as host, Esper is sub-rep. 

 

"There used to be 7 wonders of the world, but now there's 8, as everyone wonders how much of a fool you are."

 

Ice909#0065 -- Always down for a chat 

 

https://discord.gg/89qN59SbRp Plural safe-space 

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The only one who can understand me is myself and those within me. My name means strong, noble, virtuous, honorable. Esper's name means mystical, enchanted, pasture. My middle name, Jeffrey, means divine peace. Our dear co-host, Janey, her name means God is gracious. I'm not normally one for such superstitions, but it doesn't seem to be some sort of coincidence, does it? Perhaps one day I shall go further in depth about the meanings of all of our names. None of which are intentional, mind you. Maybe it's just me being naive, but maybe I'm, no, we're destined for great things. Maybe the values of our names represent us. 

Hey there, the name's Bryan. In system Re:Body(In order of the rainbow): 

Sean, Esper, Blinky, Compact, Janey, Kyle, Gwen'd, Gwen, Emily, Rollin, Waynin, Trease, Layy, Justin, Chloe, Zachery, and Elliot. 

I've been here a while. Much longer than I thought I'd be. Our system was founded October 2nd, 2018. In early 2020, we decided that due to our systems exponential growth, we'd limit who would be active. Now, every month, we do a check to see who wishes to be in dormancy and who wishes to be active. Currently, for the month of April, 2023, we've got myself(Bryan), Janey(Co-host), Emily, Layy, Chloe, and Esper(sub-rep). After over 2 long years, we can finally switch :) 

 

Bryan is currently swapped in as host, Esper is sub-rep. 

 

"There used to be 7 wonders of the world, but now there's 8, as everyone wonders how much of a fool you are."

 

Ice909#0065 -- Always down for a chat 

 

https://discord.gg/89qN59SbRp Plural safe-space 

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