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Miri and Miichu's Journey


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That's interesting. Hope it works out for you

 

I've been able to see things after waking up. Though it was random and I do not know how to do it on purpose, and it only lasts a short while. Though it at least tells me it is possible for me to see things that are presumably mind generated

 

Good luck

Creation for creation's sake.

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Quick update unrelated to imposition. We decided to revive whatever was left of Akai instead of creating a new tulpa, just because it feels more right, we missed her a lot, and it wouldn't have been fair for the new tulpa, to feel like a replacement. We just talked to her and believed she could be brought back, started thinking a lot about her and bam, I heard her reply, in the same mindvoice I failed to parrot. Success? We'll see. So far, she's as vocal as she was before she lost her strength.

 

I think I found the key to distinguishing parroting from the actual thing, and that is if it comes with a presence. During Akai's last days (?), her mindvoice lacked a presence and it felt so fake that there was no way we could believe she was sentient and real. I believe it was less about medications interfering with our tulpamancy, and more about Akai being really weak due to lack of interaction. We both apologized to her.

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Darlene got weak from time to time, SheShe fixed that.

 

You know we can't be killed or die right?

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''Reviving'' Akai just showed us how much of a mental puppet she is rip. So... let me get this straight. We believe she comes back, she does. We believe she goes away, she does. I don't know you but Miichu surely doesn't go away even if I want her to. Even when I doubted her, she was as strong as ever.


This morning we didn't hear Akai at all, and when she replied, it was obvious it was Miichu parroting her. She could feel herself doing it! But we know of a tulpa who came to be through parroting, so why isn't Akai sentient after YEARS of parroting? Perhaps we all work differently.


When I talk, Miichu doesn't decide I'm gonna talk. When she talks, I don't decide she's gonna talk. When Akai does, I do. If I forget about her, she doesn't say a thing. If I forget about my tulpa, she's still there, and can surprise me. Akai never surprises us unless there is something that just happens to remind us she's there. Yeah, I believe she's not sentient, and guess what? she stopped talking the instant we chose to believe so. What a surprise.


There's also memories that tell us something is wrong with Akai. When I recall Miichu's memories (from when she wasn't fronting), I can tell there was another person with me, they feel genuine. When I recall my memories with Akai, the only person there is me (this was way before we believed Akai was fake). Akai was based off a character I had, at some point I believed the character was real and started talking to her. She already had a personality, a very two-dimensional personality. She had two main traits: that she loved me a lot and that she hated my brother. When I created Miichu, she was a tabula rasa of a tulpa, nothing, no backstory and no personality. She grew up like a person and deviated a lot, choosing her own name and likes/dislikes, etc... According to life experiences.

 

I once came up with a dumb theory, based off this thread. That Miichu could be a mask tulpa and she became sentient when I started ''switching'' with her. Of course this was during my doubting era, when I was so desperate for my tulpas to be real that I'd accept any theory that confirmed it to me. Obviously this is dumb as I firmly believe Miichu was sentient from the first days I made her.


I am tired of rambling about why one of my tulpas is a person and the other is a puppet.

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25 minutes ago, Miri said:

This morning we didn't hear Akai at all, and when she replied, it was obvious it was Miichu parroting her. She could feel herself doing it!

  

It's generally part of my basic tulpamancy/vocality advice that your tulpa may feel/sound like you at first, but that believing they're separate and practicing vocality more eventually leads to their feeling and sounding more independent, until there's no doubt at all. But..

25 minutes ago, Miri said:

But we know of a tulpa who came to be through parroting, so why isn't Akai sentient after YEARS of parroting? Perhaps we all work differently.

 

This is a fair question, why would a tulpa fail to develop to the level of feeling/sounding autonomous over a long time?


I might not know your guys' experience as well as you do, but I might also have a better view from the outside, so correct me if I'm wrong but - it seemed to me that you exclusively spent time with Akai in the wonderland/mindspace, whereas Mirichu was much more active in the real world, talking to people on the forum and elsewhere, et cetera. I've said before that, for systems who are able to, switching offers the fastest development for a tulpa as a person. And that it seems possession can have a similar (albeit somewhat lesser) effect, still better than a pure wonderland/mindspace life, development-wise.

 

So while most tulpas do develop into feeling separate enough you outgrow parroting doubts without possession/switching, I still think that may have been the difference for you guys. I personally remember feeling Miichu was getting more important development time with how often she was interacting with the outside world compared to Akai, but since you said she wasn't as interested I didn't say anything.

 

But, she was missing out on the forcing that's the entire reason we "switch for activity's sake" in our system - I have Flandre and Reisen switch every so often specifically so they can keep their vocality and sense of self strong. Though again I still feel that wonderland and mindspace interactions can fulfill this role just fine, and we only switch instead because I'm like 1% motivated to spend time with them internally. But yeah, that's my theory.

Hi! I'm Lumi, host of Reisen, Tewi, Flandre and Lucilyn.

Everyone deserves to love and be loved. It's human nature.

My tulpas and I have a Q&A thread, which was the first (and largest) of its kind. Feel free to ask us stuff.

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That's a good theory, actually. However, when I created Miichu, she spent around 9 months as a voice in my head, without interacting with the world on her own, just through me, like Akai. So... ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

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(edited)

I went to bed to take a nap that was also a switch attempt. I guess the plan was falling asleep repeating to myself 'I'm gonna switch out' but instead, Miichu switched out!

For the longest time, we thought Miichu was also frontstuck since she's always watching and whatever, but today when I woke up from the nap, I had trouble finding her, it's like for a split second, she wasn't there.

 

Congrats on not being frontstuck, buddy :D

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Congratulations!

Creation for creation's sake.

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On 4/23/2021 at 4:32 PM, Miichu said:

We decided to revive whatever was left of Akai instead of creating a new tulpa, just because it feels more right, we missed her a lot, and it wouldn't have been fair for the new tulpa, to feel like a replacement.

 

Excellentsu!

Even without knowing her I felt sorry for Akai when you decided to give up on her. Always gives me the feels to see a fellow tupper abandoned.

Super Girls don't cry

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