Guest August 2, 2020 Share August 2, 2020 4 hours ago, Ashley said: Did you ever think that not accepting it is a good thing? Fight it and win! Kindaaa? I mean, I still think my personality was severely affected by a negative environment, just like anyone else's I guess. But I've realized, when I first started fronting, there was a mental disconnection between me and the world, I could do stuff that generally would be considered 'weird' or awkward without you know, feeling awkward. Lack of self awareness I think, then it dissapeared once I became host. The more attached I became to daily life, the more it affected me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ashley August 2, 2020 Share August 2, 2020 The only thing I can compare with that is the week I spent fronting and how I started to change gender preferences, lol. I didn't like it actually. It felt like a heat was overcoming me and I would surely overheat if I stayed that way. However, switching out, even for an hour or less, completely reversed that. I became myself and though I used to kid Bear about reversing roles, it's not who I am or how I want to be. When you do get a chance to switch out, I bet you'll lose all that feeling of awkwardness. I would bet it's a bodyOS thing. Also, being who you are is probably rewriting the bodyOS too. It will probably be easier with time just from your influence. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest August 2, 2020 Share August 2, 2020 I don't know about losing the feeling of awkwardness, kinda common sense. But I have a feeling I will be less affected by the body's habits and everything else when we manage to front equally. So no headmate is more attached than the other or more like 'bodyOS' Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ashley August 2, 2020 Share August 2, 2020 1 minute ago, Mirichu said: I don't know about losing the feeling of awkwardness, kinda common sense. But I have a feeling I will be less affected by the body's habits and everything else when we manage to front equally. So no headmate is more attached than the other or more like 'bodyOS' I agree with this. Bear can handle things in our case, but it took a lot of work to uncondition that bodyOS. What we started with in April 2018 might have been much more manageable if we did what you're doing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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