Gloomynoon November 29, 2020 Share November 29, 2020 (edited) Note: tulpa's name is now Nepeta. Extra note: I feel like my PR is very messy. I would recommend skipping to October 10th, page 3. It's a recap (and more info) of everything that has happened in my journey up to that point. I think it could be useful for beginner tulpamancers. Note to future self: rename PR if better name comes up. I will begin with trying to remember undocumented stuff, it's not too much though. --- Beginning (Before I started writing this stuff down like I probably should have?) --- I created Myo on October 20th of this year. I gave her an anime girl form, because at the time I was thinking that it would be easier to visualize, rather than a full on human. Now I know it doesn't really matter. Either way it is easier for me to talk to something with a form, rather than an orb. I might be missing out on the whole orb taking on a form of their own, but I often remind Myo that she can deviate if she wants to. She has short brown hair, her eye color is black. She wears a black suit with a red tie. She is also the same height as me. Her face was hard to visualize at the time; I hear a lot of tulpamancers have issue with visualizing the face anyway so, I decided I would not mind it. Our wonderland before today was very not final. The first one I used was condensed, there wasn't anywhere to adventure. It was more of a casual place. When I started I would try to have active forcing sessions before bed. Honestly it's pretty silly, I would take Myo to the kitchen, and have a chat while drinking coffee. I struggled with talking about stuff and fell for a lot of intrusive thoughts about the process. So during this time I would be constantly talking about the process explaining each and every detail I knew, and also my ideology on it. I understand during the early phases this does not matter too much? The point is that I'm directing my attention towards her, but if I was in her shoes; I would probably get annoyed if that's all we talked about. I tried to have methods on finding topics to talk about since I usually end up talking about something negative. I even wrote a program I didn't really use, that picks random words. At some point I thought that maybe all she needed was a personality, since originally I did JD's personality forcing method and it didn't really work out for me. A lot of the things I do have extreme symbolic meaning to me. So that's what I did, I took the soul out of her form and poured potions of personality into her. I believe this really did help. Eventually I saw I think it was a post by Miichu. Saying that you could play games and talk to your tulpa like if you were recording for YouTube. This was probably the best advice for me in terms of forcing, I find it easier to talk about games and positively too! I did this whenever I could. I would sit down and play Terraria while talking to Myo. It was fun! When I started doing this though, I stopped going to our wonderland as often. --- The past week --- This is when I started documenting. Not much happened in terms of what we were doing, however I made wonderland 2 (Which I would later scrap for something that I think is better.) We actually had adventures there and I had my fair share of chilling. We fought NPCs! It was cool! I like action. I also started noticing changes with Myo, if I think hard enough I can visualize her face perfectly, but when I'm not focusing on her facial features like usual. She's always smiling when I look at her form in my mind's eye. I also started to notice that I think my right ear moves a little bit whenever I force with Myo, and only when I force with her. Her voice also changed a bunch during this week, I think it sounded like mine, and then I gave her one to use, but then she changed it I guess...? The point is it's different now. I thought this would mean that it would be easier to differentiate us, and while it is. Sometimes it sounds like a thought I had so, I think for a second, and then continue. The end of this week I scraped the wonderland again. Now it's just Gensokyo from Touhou. It's easier to visualize and still focus directly on Myo. It's also kind of sentimental to me. We still have active sessions that last 15 minutes to 1 hour. (Sorry if this is not how you write a progress report, I can change it.) (Edit 1: I added some details I remembered in the beginning section.) Edited October 29, 2021 by Gloomynoon Made it nicer to look at(?) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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