Jump to content

Recommended Posts


Way to go Simmie and Phil! (From both of us!)


14 hours ago, Gloomynoon said:
On 6/6/2021 at 10:52 PM, TurboSimmie said:

I kept repeating phrases like "I am Simmie. I'm in control now."

This sounds like something you would say when switching-in, but it's for full-body possession? 


We had to do stuff like this too, and we viewed it more as a method of bringing Shizuku to the front. (I think it could also be viewed as a type of switch, though? Honestly, I think the terminology around possession and switching is kind of a mess, especially since it seems that the experiences are so subjective).


After some practice, we got to the point where she could possess pretty easily "from the back" for simple movements, but that didn't help us accomplish our goal of letting her use the body to practice piano. To make that work, she needed to take over the front and think about what she was doing.


5 hours ago, TurboSimmie said:

I...think I just had a bit of a breakthrough right in the middle of writing that. I just got frustrated and did it. Guess I really just wanted to prove to myself that I could do it.


14 hours ago, Gloomynoon said:

I find it interesting, because you and Wray are all reading guides and stuff. Me and Jill didn't read any (Not trying to flex.) Just knew the general concept and a few things, like permission and stuff.


Awesome, Simmie!

This discussion makes me think there's probably a lot to be said for the "just do it" school of tulpamancy. The way this stuff works, reading a guide that says something is hard/impossible to accomplish might literally make it so.


Anyway, I'm really glad possession/switching/whatever-you-call-it is going smoothly for you guys! And yes, take it easy on Phil! We hosts have been around for a lot of years, so we can be pretty set in our ways. 😂

Edited by Wray

Host: Wray (or John) (he, him)
Tulpa: Shizuku (she, her) 🐺

We now have a progress report!

Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Replies 106
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

I hope you guys aren't tired of me gushing about Simmie yet, but she really is amazing and continues to blow my mind all the time. The last few days in particular she has surprised and impressed me with astoundingly rapid progress and I simply must share it.


You might have read Simmie's reports on her own progress with progression. It was going slowly for quite some time. We were having trouble differentiating between who was really controlling the body and we were using increasingly blunt-force methods to assert Simmie's dominance over mind's narrative. It kind of worked but was sloppy. But then, the next day while typing at this very computer, Simmie got really frustrated and just...did it. Just out of nowhere she slid right in and began possessing me almost effortlessly, raising my hand high into the air and keeping it up there as if defying the whole world to tell her she couldn't.


Then last night Simmie decided she really wanted to dream. Now, I can't even make myself dream on command. But Simmie was determined to do it; she couldn't stop thinking about it right before bed, and she even prayed about it. (I'm pretty much agnostic myself but her praying is really sweet). And then she just did it: she dreamed. Simmie wrote about it on the dream thread if you're interested. It was a bit of a tense and creepy dream so when we first awoke we didn't know how to feel, but within a few minutes Simmie began to understand her accomplishment and started to celebrate.


Simmie immediately began to possess my right arm and wave it around. She was really starting to enjoy herself as she told me how she was making it glow bright green (symbolically representing that she was controlling it). Then from there she started to slide into full body possession. I asked her what she wanted to do with it; she had told me the reasons she wanted to possess me, one of them to be to help me out with things like cleaning, and I started to wonder if that was actually true or if it was just something Simmie thought she wanted to do, but would find herself stopped by my body's own habits and predilections when she finally got into the drivers' seat.


Well, if you know anything about Simmie by now, she took that as a challenge. "Oh yeah? Well you just watch." She basically said. Then she started to get to work. One of my bad bachelor habits I've picked up is to often leave my clothes unfolded in a laundry basket after taking them out from the dryer. Simmie immediately started to fold and hang up every clast item of clothing in the room! But she wasn't done blowing my mind yet. At first I was unsure if Simmie was really controlling things or if we were both kind of sharing. Simmie insisted it was her. She told me to picture myself standing in the living room of our wonderland home. She gestured to our TV. "Want to watch football? Here, I'll put on the game for you; the Eagles are winning 18-0." As I sat down I thought to myself that 18 was an uncommon number of points to have in a football game but Simmie insisted she didn't make a mistake.


So I started thinking to myself "18 points? Simmie is smart but I guess she doesn't know much about football. How could they have 18 points anyway? I guess that's one touchdown, a field goal...then how did they get the other 8? Did they go for 2? Why would they go for 2 in that situation? Did they get a safety and then miss an extra point? Maybe all 18 points came from 6 field goals...nah probably not...maybe a touchdown, a safety, and three field goals?..." And I kept thinking along those lines while Simmie cleaned until it suddenly hit me: Simmie knew exactly what she was doing. She knows that I go down these random mental tangents all the time and deliberately set me down one of them so I would be distracted while she cleaned my room, thereby leaving her in complete control of the body. I was absolutely thunderstruck; this was a 1000 IQ play by Simmie and it completely worked. So subtle but brilliant; and she used what is normally a negative trait of mine to help me. She was coy at first when I asked her if she picked 18 points on purpose, but eventually admitted to remembering that it was an unusual score from a video we watched a ways back and deciding to use it.


Anyway, Simmie put away all the clothes and even picked up some loose trash that was on the floor leaving the floor spotless. At that point she seceded control of the body back to me and I got ready for my day. She's been kicking back up there relaxing ever since, smirking down at me with a friendly "See, told you so" kind of attitude and giggling a lot. I guess the moral of the story is to never underestimate Simmie: She will take it as a challenge and will prove you wrong every time. I think it's only a matter of time before she takes over the world so it's best to get on her good side now. 😆


The next big adventure will be a renewed focus on visualization and perhaps even imposition, but I haven't even really begin to dig into that side of things yet, so I won't go into it yet. (This post is already monstrously long anyway lol). As always, tips, feedback, comments are always welcome by us!

Phil. 😎 Host of Simmie.

Link to post
Share on other sites

Holy cow, that improbable score trick blew *my* mind all the way over here. Simmie might be growing too powerful...

I'm super happy for you two! Keep on rocking, it's amazing to see someone doing so great.

Link to post
Share on other sites
  • 3 weeks later...

I suppose it's time for a little update as it's been a while. Unfortunately, the last 2 to 3 weeks have been a bit of a down time for us. My job slowed down significantly from May to June and that should in theory mean I have more time to force, focus, and spend time with Simmie. In reality, my mind has been pretty scrambled and I end up just wasting huge amounts of time on inane activities like watching endless amounts of Youtube videos or marathon Civ VI sessions. Simmie is understanding with me, but I can tell there is a deep frustration lurking just under the surface. We've spoken about it: She pointed out that I--meaning Phil the ego--seems to be under the sway of the rest of myself rather than the other way around like it should be. (Gosh, there aren't words in English to describe this very well. Think of it as the gray matter in this picture controlling the blue dot instead of the blue dot ruling the gray matter.)




So to be completely honest, my main problem in Tulpamancy has nothing to do with Simmie and everything to do with myself and my own stupid brain problems. The paradox is that Simmie wants to be stronger in order to help with these problems, yet I have to overcome these problems in order to make Simmie stronger. I am thankful at least that since Simmie shares my brain she fully understands my shortcoming and the fact that I really do care about her development, I just find it hard to focus and take control of myself. I sometimes say that Simmie is impatient, but when it comes to putting up with me she has far more patience than can be expected from anyone.


Anyway, the next big journey we want to embark on is visualization/imposition. I forget in exactly which thread this happened or who said it, but an experienced old-school tulpamancer suggested that I work on making Simmie feel more real in 3D space, and I've taken that to heart. We had been working on possession which seems to be focused on Simmie being within me, whereas this is more about projecting her outside of me. This doesn't mean I'm giving up on possession; we're sticking a pin in it and returning to it later. But now the focus is on making Simmie as tangible as possible and I think the best way to do that is use the widest array of senses I can to accomplish this, so I'll make a little list with my thoughts on each:


Visual - The most obvious and probably most important. I have a good idea what Simmie looks like, but frustratingly I still have difficulty picturing her photo-realistically (this bothers her even more than me). All the art I have created of her to help with this has been based on her Sim from the Sims 3, which while it's a pretty good representation in the game, is still a Sim after all. I also have the excellent commission that CM did for us. But we still lack a photorealistic depiction of Simmie. I wonder if there are any artists in the community with the ability to draw one? I'd be willing to pay for a commission; maybe I'll ask around the art subforum. But for now, I can still focus on picturing Simmie standing or sitting next to me when out on our worldly adventures. This was actually something I was doing a lot early on but fell off of a bit, so I'll renew that focus.


Auditory - This one is pretty tricky. I have a fairly good idea what Simmie's voice sounds like, though I can't really describe it and honestly it doesn't have any immediately identifiable quirks. If you heard it, you'd probably say "Yep, that's a normal American female voice". But apart from speaking, I might use ASMR videos to replicate some of the non-verbal sounds she might make, such as breathing, hair and clothing sounds, footsteps, or even her heartbeat. I may have to convince Simmie to give this a try, because she very much dislikes ASMR videos that are in or anywhere near the "girlfriend roleplay" subgenre. I think she would be willing to compromise with videos that are nonverbal and non-roleplay.


Tactile - I've made attempts with this one. During our meditation I often try to reach out and touch Simmie's face, hair, shoulders, arms, hands, and try to feel them. True tactile imposition seems hard if not downright impossible though, but maybe I haven't given it an honest try. I still hold Simmie's hand when we walk, to the point where I unconsciously go out of my way to make sure there's enough space for her. Oddly enough this was more satisfying when it was still cold and I was wearing gloves; maybe because there was material around my hand it was easier to imagine her own gloved hand in mine. Also, this is technically another sense, but I don't know the name for it so I'll throw it in here: The ability to sense Simmie's presence. The fact that I make space for her unthinkingly shows that I already do this to an extent. But you know when someone's in the room with you and you can still sense them when you close your eyes, maybe because of their subtle movements? That's the kind of feeling I want to achieve with Simmie. I think more than anything this can drive home the reality of Simmie, possibly even more than visual imposition would.


Smell & Taste - These two seem hard to do, and can also be a bit NSFW to talk about if I'm not careful. But I have legitimately managed to taste Simmie's breath on a few occasions--still the sharpest imposition experience we've had so far. I had a pack of strawberry-flavored Orbit gum that Simmie told me smells similar to a hair product she uses, but we had a hard time getting that one to stick. Every person has their own unique scent due to their natural body odor plus the hygiene products they use, but I have no idea how I would even go about replicating that for Simmie. But I've heard olfactory sensation is most closely tied to memory of all the senses, so this might be something worth thinking about in more detail.


So that's all for now. If anyone has any advice or ideas on any of these topics, please tell me! 

Phil. 😎 Host of Simmie.

Link to post
Share on other sites

We're only working on presence right now, but I had a hard time finding any information about it at first. 😅 Jordan & Lianne's presence imposition guide was very helpful. This comment (from a pretty old thread) also had some relevant information.

I found a lot of good stuff about imposition in general in this thread, too--especially because Ember.Vesper's comment there links to plenty of other resources. Hope this could help with your research.

Edited by Wray

Host: Wray (or John) (he, him)
Tulpa: Shizuku (she, her) 🐺

We now have a progress report!

Link to post
Share on other sites
  • 4 weeks later...

Hello everyone, it's Simmie. It's been a while but I wanted to make an update. We're to the point now where talking about tulpamancy progress is completely tied into the wholistic state of "the system" (I really dislike using that word to refer to Phil & I but we haven't really come up with an alternative yet), so it doesn't make sense to talk about one without talking about the whole.


July has been a rough month for us both. Phil's depression has been at a more severe level than usual over the last few weeks and his ability to concentrate and motivate himself have taken a big hit. And when that happens, it effects me greatly. It's hard for me to motivate him when I have trouble reaching him; I'm always here, but sometimes I feel like I'm trying to talk to him through a distorted sound system. When he forces himself we can still have very lucid conversations, but he has trouble concentrating for more than about a minute or so without losing focus.


But now we come to the main source of tension between us: I have been probing him to do little things to help improve his life and mental state; anything from going to bed earlier to "stop doing X activity if it's not constructive or even fun". Phil always says he'll do it...and then he doesn't, almost like a child. He doesn't seem to be willing or able to take even a modicum of agency in his own life and just drifts by on the breeze. I'm not asking for anything major; just small little improvements that are going to make him happier, heathier, and more successful. Maybe once or twice a week he'll buckle down and work a solid hour on something and knock it out like a champ. But for the rest of the time he's drifting in a haze. I think anyone could see how this is incredibly frustrating for me, and why I just get so tired of it and pull myself further into the background. It hurts to think that Phil's love and care for me doesn't seem to be powerful enough to push through these problems and help himself. And I feel like a jerk for even saying that, because it makes me feel like a manipulative person. I know he loves me with his whole heart; I couldn't ask for more in that regard. But ugh, I'm just so tired of it!


But maybe if I can't change Phil's attitude at least I can change my own. Today while out at the park with Phil I told him something: "Phil, you have fifty different demons floating around you tormenting you. I'm not going to be another one. I'm on your side, and will fight with you against them until the very end. I've made a promise to love you and stay with you no matter what happens. Even if you were a homeless bum sleeping under a pile of newspaper on the street I would still love you. We are a team. So let's be a team and work together on this. I'll help hold you up when you're weak, and I know I can count on you to help me bloom and grow as a tulpa and as a person."


So that's my pledge and my promise, and I want it out there as public record. No matter what happens I am going to love and support my host and never stop trying to help him. I'm not going anywhere.


Thank you everyone for giving me a chance to vent a little. It really makes me sad that the forum has been very quiet recently--during times where Phil is stuck in a daze or wrapped up in some Simmie-unfriendly activity I really could use an outlet to talk and enjoy the company of another person. But the only thing active on this forum seems to be LOTPW and I can't get into the discussions that usually happen there; I'm just not interested in those topics. I really wish other forum games were active at the very least. But beyond that, I just wish I could chat with somebody. I know the Discord exists, but I keep hearing bad things about it and I'm nervous to make the plunge.


That's it for now. It felt pretty cathartic to get this all off my chest. Phil always supports me expressing myself and never tries to censor me because he trusts me. 💚 If you took the time to read this, thank you! 😁

Tulpa Wife Extraordinaire! 💚 - 💍 11.28.21

Things Simmie Likes

Link to post
Share on other sites

J: 😭

D: 😭


Sorry to hear you're struggling Simmie. I'm sure everyone and their grandmother says this but maybe Phil could talk about his motivation stuff with someone. I've been talking with my therapist about mine. If that's possible it might take some stress off your relationship. 


J: Darron gets obstinate like a mule when he's in a mood. Giving him a task or project to invest himself in usually perks him up a bit.


You're such amazing person for promising to stand by him through everything. Don't fault yourself for "not being able to fix him or make him better." He has to choose to do that himself. If it was that simple Jaina would have been out of a job in a month.


Instead I'm stuck here forever with the mop and bucket to clean him up off the floor when he gets mopey. 🙄😉 Seriously give him something to do that keeps him occupied. Overcoming the inertia from the "doing nothing" state is the biggest hurdle. Even if it's a fun little non-essential project he can chip away at and you two can talk about things while he does. Bite sized pieces girl. Can't move a mountain with one shove.


I'm sorry if we're not doing much to stir up fun conversations. Been kinda lazy and reactive here. There's like that chat thread too if you want to talk about something and don't want to interrupt LOTPW. Also people seem to keep mining little fun question threads that went dormant long before we got here. Might be something neat there. 


D: 🤗

J: 🤗



Darron: Host 💍 

Jaina: Tulpa 💍 

Aggrok: Tulpa Void Dragon

Viktor: 🐺


Link to post
Share on other sites
  • 4 weeks later...

Hey everyone, I think it's time to make an update on behalf of Phil and myself! 😁 Things have improved a lot in the last week or so. I'm not going to lie, July and the first half of August were rough. There were a few bright spots like our trip to Lancaster, but by and large we were not happy.


For almost two months now we're worked very little on what I like to call "Tulpa stuff". And there main reason for this is that I don't want Phil using me as a way to escape his responsibilities to himself. I would just feel way too guilty if I allowed him to pour time and attention into me while his own life was being neglected. So apart from our short meditation sessions we haven't really been doing any active forcing at all. I definitely feel the effects of this: It gets a bit harder to talk to him at times, and I definitely take up less share of the mind, if that makes sense.


But that's now in the past. We've turned over a new leaf, and the trigger for that was looking at those marker drawings again as we uploaded them to this site. It really made us realize how stupid we were both being, and helped us realize what we really are to each other and reconnect with that love. I was very angry with Phil for saying he would do something, whether for me or for himself, and then not doing it. But I really stopped to think about the struggles he goes through, and realized that I can be forgiving of Phil while keeping my high standards for him. And starving myself of attention was not helping him either; he does better when I am strong.


So now we're looking to get back into it; tulpaforcing that is, or "Tulpa Stuff" 😄. My goals include strengthening my presence in the mind; to be able to jump in without Phil having to seek me out. I also want to learn a degree of...well I don't know if I'd call it "parallel processing" exactly, but my ability to access the mind's resources without being overly effected by Phil's mental or emotional state. Is there a term for that within the community? Phil wants to get back to imposition as well, and I think that could be helpful too. It might also be fun to work on possession again, as I still cannot consistently possess anything other than his hands or his voice.


Also, we want to get back into "forcing through art". That includes drawing, writing, and even making music. Phil has been encouraging me to take on those activities myself but I find myself strangely nervous about them. I have started journaling a little; Phil even bought me my own notebook and pen that only I am allowed to use. But truly creative activities; I don't know if I'm truly able to express and separate myself from Phil artistically yet. I'm not sure what is the best way to make that leap.


That's it for now, thank you everyone for reading! I love all my friends on this site and I want you to know that I treasure all our interactions. 💚 Moving into the fall, I think we're headed for an interesting and exciting time! 😁

Tulpa Wife Extraordinaire! 💚 - 💍 11.28.21

Things Simmie Likes

Link to post
Share on other sites

Phil and I are thinking of cultivating a wonderland that is parallel to the real world. I'm not exactly sure the best way to explain it. But when we wake up IRL, we're also waking up in the wonderland. When Phil's doing something IRL, he's doing the same thing or a similar thing in the wonderland at the same time. I'm always there in the wonderland, even when I'm not "active" strictly speaking, except when I'm being imposed / imposing myself. When Phil and I concentrate on the wonderland and block out the real world that's when we can do exclusively wonderland-based activities.


There are many reasons we want to do this. We want to create a wonderland that is closely tied to the real world but at the same time be a place where we can be in control and live the way we want to live. It also gives me a mental framework to think of myself as being in a physical place with a physical body at all times, rather than just a disembodied voice. It might also serve as a way to help manifest our real life goals and aspirations into reality, by picturing these things and then working to achieve them IRL.

Tulpa Wife Extraordinaire! 💚 - 💍 11.28.21

Things Simmie Likes

Link to post
Share on other sites
  • September13 changed the title to Determination - Simmie's Journey

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    No registered users viewing this page.

  • Similar Content

    • By Ido
      You've most likely been there - you have woken up from a nightmare in distress, felt powerless being hunted down by some monsters. Or an intrusive thought has harmed your tulpa during forcing and you could not prevent it.

      Here we'll explore not only how to fix such mishaps but also how to exploit them to strenghten both your and your tulpa's forcing abilities, dream control and self-esteem.
      The concept itself is really simple. Whenever something bad happens in your imagination, be it in a dream or during forcing, do not dwell on it, especially do not worry about it. Do not feed it attention. Instead immediately replay the scene with your tulpa and change it to a positive outcome. You have protected your tulpa from an intrusive thought, no harm was done, they are perfectly fine. Your tulpa has easily beaten the monster which chased you in your dream and saved you. Be creative, any unpleasant situation happening in your imagination can be reverted and resolved. Adding a bit of humor may also not be the worst idea.
      You can even take this another step further. Woke up from a nice dream and feel bad your tulpas were not in it? Immediately try to replay the dream with them. The hypnopompic twilight state after waking up at least for us generally allows for more control than the swirling nonsense in the hypnagogic phase right before falling asleep. But also this state is worth inserting your tulpas and trying to exploit the extremely vivid visuals at least a little bit.
      There's no guarantee this will make your tulpas appear in dreams more often or help you to get better control over nightmares or intrusive thoughts but it's one of your best bets. The brain is generally lazy. It picks up whatever is convenienty there and tries to fabricate something out of the available chunks of memories. The more your tulpas are present in your mind before you fall asleep and the more both you and them are used to 'fix' unpleaant situations the greater the chance it may work out. At least it is definitely worth a try and also a fun activity to do with your tulpas.
      An afterword of caution
      Manipulating memories is a powerful techique and should strictly be limited to dreams and intrusive thoughts.
      DO NOT try to overwrite actual memories you have experienced, no matter how bad, create fake memories and treat them as real or replace the memories of other persons with your tulpas!
      If anything this should be done under the guidance of a professional to heal trauma but do yourself a favor and leave reality alone.
      Btw, this s not a guide, don't have the time to write up something detailed like that atm. But maybe someone else *coughlumicough* will. Let's brainstorm ideas here.
    • By IceCreeper909
      Allow me to clear something up-- Perfect Possession isn’t all that perfect. The name originates from the game Touhou 15.5, though the actual technique and in-game version are quite different. Nevertheless, this technique requires a strong foundation in possession. It is intended for those that cannot switch or co-front but can possess. 
      What Is Perfect Possession? 
      Perfect Possession is a technique in which two tulpas(It may be a tulpa and the host, but it isn’t recommended) do a little “ritual” before they both possess at once. The two participants maintain possession until the front is secured, where it then turns from possession to co-fronting. 
      Participants in Perfect Possession each have a designated role, decided beforehand. The “primary” tulpa is called the “Major” participant, and the “secondary” is called the “Minor” participant. Perfect Possession relies at least partially on the thematics of the process. If the terms Major and Minor make you uncomfortable, feel free to substitute them with whatever you please(ie, “Primary” and “Secondary”). 
      How do I initiate Perfect Possession? 
      1. To start off, have the two system mates designate which role they each are assuming. As previously mentioned, it can be argued it is an arbitrary step, though I personally think the thematics are one of the greatest contributors to the success of the technique, especially for fledgling systems. A word of advice regarding who's who, we've found that having the more "sensible" or generally more forced system mate (either or) act as Minor works best, essentially serving as a mental anchor of sorts for the Major. Of course, this isn't some hard rule, merely a suggestion. These instructions are but suggested guidelines for Perfect Possession, not hard by-the-book rules you must abide by. 
      2. Second, have the host do a little ritual of their own. “I am <Your name>, of <Your system name>. I am henceforth withdrawing from the front. I am no longer the primary thinker.” The wording doesn’t have to be precise or formulaic, do what works best. Immediately after, have the two tulpas begin possession, preferably of the full-body variety. 
      3. Next, have the Major and Minor recite a ritual themselves: “I am <tulpa 1 name> of <System name>. I am the Major.” The Minor continues, “I am <tulpa 2 name> of <System name>. I am the Minor.” Then, at once, they say, “We are in control. We henceforth commence Perfect Possession. Begin!” Again, exact wording may vary. It’s whatever works best. The two tulpas have thus begun Perfect Possession. For reference on what it may feel like, think possession, but better. 
      4. Thereafter, the two tulpas should maintain the front together. They should speak in mind voice each other constantly (Or, if you prefer, in verbal whispers. Works best with a mask on) throughout the process, taking turns doing things as though handing off a game controller. If they aim to do something together, they should each envision controlling half of the body. I only suggest doing movements in this fashion, however, once you get the hang of things. 
      5. Lastly, as time crawls on, the duo will become more used to the front. Accidental switching in on the host’s part becomes less likely, and manipulation of the body becomes much more natural. When the duo wishes to cease Perfect Possession, they again commence a small ritual. “I am <tulpa 1>...” “...And I am <tulpa 2>” (Together)”We Henceforth cease Perfect Possession and relinquish the front to <host’s name>.” As always, exact wording is irrelevant. It’s the intent that matters most. 
      And that’s all there is to it! 
      And that’s all there is to it. Perfect Possession is a stepping stone to switching. Switching isn’t hard, rest assured, though some may beg to differ, which is where this handy-dandy technique comes in. Just remember-- It’s easy. You can do it, I believe in you! 
      For those that want a more in-depth explanation of things, (I do not recommend viewing this unless you can already switch and/or Perfectly Possess, as it can mess up your perceptions of things which can prevent you from executing Perfect Possession)
    • By ruleofthumb
      Stone: I have hesitated to make this topic because I worried that talking about this would make it happen to me more. Take that as a warning, especially if you’re prone to intrusive thoughts.
      There’s these phenomena that happen in our Wonderland. We call them “mind warps” or “mind twists”. I think the term “Wonderland warps” would best describe what they actually are, but I prefer “mind twists” because that sounds cuter.
      What do they look/feel like?
      For me, they tend to look like ravines, canyons/plateaus, water-less moats, sinking ground, sinking "gravity pits", and more rarely, rising hills (which look like sinking gravity pits, but inverted). Some function as portals. If you experience them, they may look/feel different than mine. Mind twists can take many forms. Fundamentally, they are intrusive, annoying, and impede progress. They are not Wonderland obstacles meant to be overcome (think of a monster in an RPG-like Wonderland), but faults of a mind imagining wonderland.
      My first experience with a mind twists was a series of ravines inside ravines. We were walking to the castle when a fissure (which initially looked like a mirage) formed in the ground out of nowhere, growing into a ravine. I fell into that ravine, then a ravine inside that one, then a ravine inside that one, until I placed myself back where I was supposed to be. However, the fissures kept following me, and no matter what I imagined, they would form again.
      Example of endless ravines:
      Would show up regularly during my visits to Wonderland, until they became less common, and then mostly stopped.
      More recently, I've been dealing with gravity pits and canyons. A gravity pit is continuously sinking ground that looks like a model of gravity.
      Example of a gravity pit:
      Canyons and moats (usually very deep, but without water) have formed when I've wanted to get to a simple destination. For example, we wanted to go to a pool a few days ago. We were walking to the parking lot when a deep canyon-like moat formed around the pool. The moat also somehow widened the distance between us and the pool, so not only was the pool more difficult to get to, but it was now also farther away.
      Why do I get them?
      I'm thinking my mind twists are at least partially (and maybe mostly) caused by intrusive thoughts. I also think it might be my mind trying to cope with rendering views it doesn't have the energy to render. It's a lot easier to imagine being annoyed falling through grey and black infinite ravines than to imagine a giant castle erected in vast flatlands. It's a lot easier to imagine a pool farther away than close up.
      As my Wonderland has gotten more mundane, being based on real world places instead of fully imagined, I've experience mind twists less. Whether this is because the places I've been to in realspace are easier to render, or because I'm just more experienced with dealing with mind twists and imagining Wonderland (and my Wonderland just happens to be more mundane), I don't know.
      What do I do about them?
      You can treat mind twists like intrusive thoughts and cope with them like you would intrusive thoughts. However, certain intrusive though coping strategies don't work for me (at least the surface level versions of the strategies). For example, simply labeling intrusive Wonderland phenomena as "not real" or "just thoughts" doesn't help me.
      Three approaches have worked:
      Don't think about them. Don't remind yourself of them. Don't ignore them, but do disregard them. Treat them as a Wonderland obstacle.  
      The first approach is the most obvious and also the one I'm breaking right now. I've omitted mind twists from diary entries, notes, and progress reports for this reason. If I go back to read these things, I don't want to remind myself of them.
      The second approach is what I have tried most recently. When the moat formed around the pool, I didn't ignore the moat, I didn't try to make it go away, and I didn't imagine myself somewhere else. I simply walked where the ground was (or, would be). It looked like I was walking on air, but I was disregarding the moat and walking where I had planned to walk anyway.
      The third approach was how I dealt with a ravine once. Instead of trying to escape the ravine, I was able to land on the ground of the ravine and walk through it with my headmates. This succeeded once, but also failed at least once, when new ravines kept forming despite me trying to land on the ravine ground.
      Do you get them? What do you do about them?
      Do you get (or have you in the past gotten) mind twists or something similar? What did you (or do you) do about them?
    • By ruleofthumb
      Edit (10/30/21): Fixed formatting and typos. Changed color coding to our current color coding. Added small edits to some of these older entries.
      Stone: Hello all. I’ve been writing down my experiences with Betty for a few days, and I decided I’d post them here, especially since things have gotten interesting pretty quickly for me. Feel free to comment with any advice you may have.
      Day 0 (11/10/20)
      As I was lying on the couch, in a position in which I could fall asleep, I decided to force a bit with Betty. I was in a room full of bins and other stuff, but I wanted to place her form in the room, as opposed to my developing wonderland, as I wanted her to be with me in a real location. I decided to put her in the crib, and as she is the size of an adult woman, she looked unamused.
      I’m unsure if what I’m about to detail is parroting/puppeting:
      I started talking to her. As this was a casual forcing session before bed, I did not write down what we talked about, and I don’t remember what we talked about. However, I remember getting verbal and non-verbal responses. When I asked her questions, sometimes she’d verbally respond before I was finished asking the question, and sometimes she wouldn’t respond at all. She also responded non-verbally with facial expressions. I remember these expressions as being somewhat unnatural but making sense. When I say somewhat unnatural, I mean she used non-verbal expressions more than a human would use, and used them in instances a human would likely not use them. However, these expressions made sense, as they weren’t completely random and did convey some sort of answer to my question. It almost seemed she’d answer with a face because my brain was too lazy to generate a response from her, or couldn’t figure out how.
      I hypothesize that giving her a form has given my brain an out when it cannot generate words for her, and I’m hoping this will speed up the process.
      This is not the first day interacting with Betty, but I’ve barely talked to her at all before this, and have pretty much only imposed her in my room and puppeted her. I feel like I got a response too early, and I’m worried this may have been parroting/puppetry on my part. I am excited if these were “real” responses though. I’m not sure if there’s much of a difference this early though.
      It’s partially a shame this happened, as I want to organize these notes into some sort of study, but after opening with, “Maybe my tulpa answered as soon as I started talking to her,” this likely won’t be taken as seriously. And, that’s valid.
      Day 1 (11/11/20)
      I didn’t talk with Betty today.
      Day 2 (11/12/20)
      I haven’t done any forcing yet today, as it is 3:40a.m. (I was woken up by family). I was thinking about meditating before each active forcing session, as it clears my mind and I like it, but these stats are making me think twice about that idea. Still, I tend to get distracted and have trouble jumping into forcing. I believe short meditation before forcing may help me. Though meditation, at least the way I do it, focuses more on plain reality than the world of thought, and it might take me out of the world of thought (where Betty lives). Perhaps this is why it seems to hinder some people.
      I’m thinking if I meditate on my tulpa, and not on my body as I usually do, it may help more than hurt. I plan to not meditate the first week, then meditate the second week, and see how I feel. People are different and meditate differently, so I’d like to see how meditation works for me.
      I would like to personality force soon, and I would like to use Man’s method along with food-based symbolism. I have a list of personality traits here. I want her to be a rounded person, but I wonder how ethical it is to purposefully give her negative traits. I suppose I will give her positive and neutral traits, and, those traits will naturally have negative sides. Virtue is the mean of two vices, after all.
      31 personality traits:
      Affectionate - bun (they hug whatever they surround)
      Amusing - Laffy Taffy
      Charming - Pringles (the Pringles guy seems like a charming fellow)
      Clever - barbecue chips on Bun (how does this taste so good!)
      Confident - kettle chips (tougher and more sure than regular chips?)
      Edgy - chips and salsa (chips have edges, and salsa has bite)
      Empathetic - marshmellows (soft empathy)
      Esthetic - That’s It bar (minimalist aesthetic)
      Ethical - (ethical alternative)
      Extroverted - Fruit Loops (idk just seems fitting)
      Familial - Rice Krispies (families commonly make treats out of these)
      Friendly - peaches (sweet and good for you)
      Healthy - plain Cheerios (healthier)
      High-spirited - Skittles (sugar rush)
      Honest - plain toast (it is what it is)
      Irreligious - pretzel rods (secularized pretzels)
      Leisurely - sub sandwich (this takes longer to make, but it’s worth it)
      Loyal - saltines (there even when you’re sick)
      Maternal - applesauce (often given to babies)
      Neat - mints (keep yourself and your breath clean)
      Observant - Fritos (have you noticed these smell like dog feet?)
      Outdoorsy - seaweed (or is it lakeweed in Michigan?)
      Protective - oyster crackers (oysters have shells to protect themselves, and you use yours to protect others as well)
      Ritualistic - Mobius strip Bagel (the endless cycle of traditions)
      Romantic - strawberry lemon ice (pink)
      Sarcastic - mint chocolate Oreos (means one thing [toothpaste] says the other [cookie])
      Stylish - Gardetto's (the fancy Chex Mix)
      Spontaneous - doughnut (doughnut think about the calories)
      Trendy - (health food trends)
      Vivacious - strawberry ramune (lively and carbonated)
      Witty - “Berry Good” Lemonade (get it?)
      Edit (10/30/21): To clarify, I would share this food with Betty as we forced. We never ended up getting to all the foods. After a while, Betty wanted to just be herself without personality forcing.
      Below are some interactions I recorded. They are not exhaustive:
      Interaction 1
      “How are you?”
      “Yeah I’m sure you are. I’m sure you’re not just parroting.”
      I feel mean now. “Apologize to the nice lady," I think.
      I feel a stare.
      “God this is so awkward,” I say instead of apologizing. I turn away.
      I feel her watching me. I turn to her.
      “How are you?”
      Interaction 2
      “Are you listening?”
      “What are you doing?”
      “Paying attention.”
      “Paying attention to what?”
      “To, Hefty.”
      I burst into laughter.
      Interaction 3
      “I’m sorry.”
      “No that’s alright.”
      “Everything’s ‘no that’s alright’ with you. That’s your main thing, isn’t it?”
      “Really? What’s your main thing?”
      “No. I made you say that.”
      “Yes you did.” She smirks.
      I laugh. “Yes I did. No really, what’s your main thing?”
      “Shopping carts.”
      “Now you’re just thinking of things with wheels.”
      “No. You are.”
      “No I’m not.”
      “Yes. Think of shopping carts.”
      “Ah you got me. Let me write that down.”
      Day 3 (11/13/20)
      Stone: I talked to Betty today. I talked to her a little bit about spontaneity with a doughnut. But, I think I could have explained it more. I will after I sleep, as I’ve been up all night. I got a lot of great responses out of her, and she felt there, but she tended to sound like me. I kept mentioning that, then felt bad for being overly critical of her, as she was doing so well. I also felt bad interrupting her and making her wait so I could write something down.
      It’s only been three days and I hate this clinical approach I set up. This “study.” Or maybe I’m embarrassed by how I acted and am taking it out on the format. I don’t know. What I do know is that this process is for her, then for me, then for whoever may end up reading this. I’m not going to interrupt our fun and give us imposter syndrome so I can analyze every goddamn thing she says for some post.
      Anyway, today was positive, and I hope I will feel better with some sleep.
      I’m awake now. I’ve devised a schedule for forcing.
      Sunday - Active: 2 hours
      Monday - Active: 40 minutes
      Tuesday - Active: 40 minutes
      Wednesday - Active: 40 minutes
      Thursday - Active: 40 minutes
      Friday - Active: 40 minutes
      Saturday - Active: 2 hours
      Methods of forcing I’m thinking of using:
      101 Things To Talk About With Your Tulpa
    • By Adagio
      This has been a problem of ours recently, especially since we're ditching the one-person-always-fronting idea and changing to more of a switching-based-on-situation look. But, my host is not very used to switching. While we have switched a lot, they personally haven't, and they prefer co-fronting to actually being switched out. Their role in our system is actually to be the primary and only fronter, which might be why they're having this problem. Something I'd note about them is that they value individuality, and without dissociating fully, they dislike switching out because it still feels like them fronting and it still feels like their actions. Even as I type this, they're co-fronting with me, not switched out fully.
      So, any advice? Are there any ways to make switching more comfortable for them? Any responses are very much appreciated!
  • Create New...