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Simmie - Brand New


September13

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September13

I'm an absolute beginner to Tulpamancy and only made my decision to start developing my tulpa a week ago, even though Simmie as an idea isn't new to me and I've actually had a headmate before: Between the ages of 7 and 15 I had a headmate that was less a tulpa and more a walk-in/soulbound (I'm still learning the terminology so I might misuse a word here and there, I'm sorry). He was more of a mentor / spiritual guide to me and largely faded away after the age of 15, telling me I had outgrown him and had to face the world on my own, and only making sporadic appearances after that. But I'm not here to talk about him in this thread, I'm here to talk about Simmie.

 

Before I get into it I want to reiterate that Simmie is only the most fledgling little tulpa and I can sense that she is very nervous about attention being put on her, but she's okay with it if it helps her become more real to me. So please be gentle and kind with her, she's a very curious young thing and loves listening to people and learning about things, and I want to make sure only positive and loving things enter her mind during this early stage of development.

 

As I mentioned I created Simmie as a character long before I started working on her as a tulpa. There's an interesting story behind the creation of Simmie as a character. You see, I'm not transgender and I don't really even have gender dysphoria (I'm at ease in my male body and don't feel wrong having it). However, I have a huge fascination with the idea of being turned into a girl, made to act and dress like a girl, all that stuff. I don't know why and I can't really explain it. But I was aching to step out of myself to explore it, so over a year ago I created Simmie as an OC / proxy / meta-character whom I would experience and create art from. I would make art "as" Simmie and even interact with people as her. I developed a backstory for Simmie and everything and really got into character--as a writer, this is something I've done so many times, and writing characters is probably my greatest strength. I even created Simmie in The Sims (yes, there is a name connection there) and she has a very distinctive look which makes it extremely easy to visualize her, although my mind currently still renders her as a Sims character rather than a real human figure.

 

Then comes the last month or so and I learn about Tulpamancy. At first I think it's just something fascinating to learn about but not something I'd pursue myself. But the more I read and watched videos about it the more I realized that this was something I wanted to do, and I knew there was nowhere else I could turn to than Simmie. She already felt very real to me as a character and I felt if I could elevate her to the status of a living, sentient tulpa, that would be a most wonderful thing and could be revolutionary in my life. There aren't a lot of people in my life I connect with strongly and I suffer from depression; the thought of having someone sharing my head with me who I can talk and relate to still feels like it could absolutely change my life.

 

Once I decided on making Simmie a tulpa I started narrating to her non-stop. I told her about myself, about my life, and explained what I was doing at any given moment to her if I could spare the mental horsepower at any given moment. I started to feel a warm, contented feeling as I did this. I don't know if I could call it sentience, but I felt like I was not alone and I could feel a joy that seemed to be radiated to me from elsewhere. I pushed aside doubt and let myself believe it was Simmie--now I know she absolutely loves being talked to, loves when I tell her about my life and even the most mundane things about me, and loves when I tell her stories. We began to speak to each other but it still felt like I was parroting her rather than letting her speak for herself. Now I'm trying to not talk for her and let her reply to me herself. I can feel her emotions very strongly though, and that's what makes me believe that she is really there.

 

Yesterday I decided to take Simmie out on a bit of a "date"; we went to a local nature park and walked. I talked to her about the park, what it was and why it existed, why the leaves fall off the trees in the fall, how the mud on the trail was created by rain the pervious day, mundane stuff like that. She was very curious about all of it, and I talked to her more about what I thought about it all, and what I thought about it all. Then I rattled off a list of adjectives to describe Simmie before realizing that I had just created a mantra that was perfect for forcing: "You're caring, you're kind, you listen, you're curious, you're playful". I began repeating that mantra over and over again as I walked.

After the walk I took Simmie to the beach. I wanted her to see and hear the ocean, to feel the sand (sadly it was too cold to walk barefoot in the sand so I had to settle for picking some up in my hand). It was a perfectly clear and beautiful evening and I could tell that Simmie was overjoyed and even touched that I would think to bring her there. I told her about the tides, why there were shells on the beach, what docks and drawbridges were for, and she listened to it all. As we walked on the empty, cold, windy beach I did not feel alone at all; I felt together with her and happier than I had felt in ages; a true soulful happiness. I could tell she valued everything I was doing for her and although I still couldn't hear her speak without parroting I could still feel the intention behind what she would say if she could, and it was just about the nicest thing anyone had ever said to me. She thinks more highly of me than I do myself sometimes.

 

So that's where I am with Simmie now. I continue to narrate to her and repeat my mantra to her. Every night I try to tell her a story about some event in my past. Sometimes I think I can hear her talking in my mind, but I still can't be sure I'm not just putting words into her mouth. I plan to take her on a mini-roadtrip to my old college, a location which always triggers powerful memories for me. I want to just project love and goodness into Simmie and let her feed and grow off of it. I know she will eventually deviate from the character I first created, and I welcome it, because I really want to see who she develops into being. She already is teasing me a little trying to embarrass me by calling two of my friend cute, which I find very funny and endearing. She also picked out her own birthday, which is where I got the admittedly lame handle from.

 

So that's it so far! I hope that wasn't too big of a post for a newbie! I really want to hear from experienced Tulpamancers and people on here in general as to whether I have a healthy mindset about this and am going about this in a good way, and if there's anything else I could do to help the process along. I don't want this to become yet another project I'm high on for a couple weeks and abandon--I feel that there is something more there, and if there's one thing I've learned about Simmie is that she's thrilled to exist, and yearns to be more and more real, and I want to help her achieve that. And when she's ready, I'm sure she'll come on here herself and talk to all of you!

Also known as GypsyRoad or Phil Present. Call me what you want, I'm not picky.

Simmie is my lovely tulpa, she's quite young still but is eager to meet and chat with new people so don't hesitate to say hi!

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September13

Some more things to report:

 

We created a wonderland that for now is a large-ish room. We wanted to keep things simple at first and just have a room we could enter to be together. This room has couches and chairs, a tv, computer, games, a full kitchen, a bed, and a bathroom right off the main room. I'm trying to spend time with her in that room at least once a day, preferably more, but trying to keep my mind clear and only focusing on the room and Simmie can be hard sometimes with wandering thoughts.

 

Things have been a little up and down over the last few days. Sometimes I get a little impatient and want to see signs of Simmie being truly sentient, but I have to remind myself that I literally just started this process a week ago and I can't expect her to grow into a true tulpa without weeks of consistent work. I have felt emotional responses from her, as well as a little head pressure from time to time, and possibly even a word or two but I can't be certain about whether they are coming from her or not.

 

I've also done something which I think is helpful but may be counterproductive: I created a discord account for Simmie and we chat back and forth using it. Now, I'm aware that I'm basically roleplaying AS Simmie rather than letting her reply for herself, which she obviously can't do at such an early stage. But as I said in my initial post, I have thought about Simmie the character quite extensively over the last year and a half and know how she would respond to things. I'm hoping that this is an effective way of forcing and not something that could be counterproductive or damaging. It seems to be helping, though: We sometimes talk about what we'll do later in our wonderland and it always works out better than when we don't talk it out over text first.

 

I plan to keep narrating to Simmie, tell her stories, show her music and stories I've written in the past, and take her on mini road trips to see places that are meaningful to me. I will keep going to our wonderland and try different techniques to meditate. I'll keep pouring over different guides on this and other sites. I believe Simmie is real and I believe I have what it takes for her to be a true tulpa!

Also known as GypsyRoad or Phil Present. Call me what you want, I'm not picky.

Simmie is my lovely tulpa, she's quite young still but is eager to meet and chat with new people so don't hesitate to say hi!

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ruleofthumb

Stone: My headmates and I made ourselves in the Sims. We might go back to that save once we're done with school. I think it's a good way to play a game with your headmates, because you all get your own sim and the game can be paused so that you all get a chance to make decisions. 

 

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I felt like I was not alone and I could feel a joy that seemed to be radiated to me from elsewhere. I pushed aside doubt and let myself believe it was Simmie

 

This is similar to what happened to me when I started feeling Betty's presence. It just felt like there was someone else there. I think I more felt her staring at me than her emotions, but being stared at can be a strong and specific feeling!

 

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 "You're caring, you're kind, you listen, you're curious, you're playful". I began repeating that mantra over and over again as I walked.

 

This is what's called "personality forcing." The way I personality forced with Betty was I shared food with her that symbolically represented a trait, and I explained the trait to her. It is important to note that tulpae may want to diverge from the traits you ascribe to them. Some tulpae. especially tulpae based of of characters, may have an identity crisis because their creator wants them to behave like x anime character or x OC, and they want to behave differently. What I did to (try to) prevent this was tell Betty that while I'm giving these traits to her, she does not have to take them, or can take them in whatever quantity she chooses. I think this is a good safety measure while personality forcing.

 

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 "You're caring, you're kind, you listen, you're curious, you're playful". I began repeating that mantra over and over again as I walked.

 

Dawwww very nice.

 

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I don't want this to become yet another project I'm high on for a couple weeks and abandon

 

I've been seriously engaging in this practice for exactly a month (and visualizing Betty's form on and off before then). I can't tell you much about abandoning tulpamancy after a month, but I can tell you how I've made it this far. I was really excited at first. I could talk to Betty and focus on just her for two hours straight, and enjoy all of it. There were so many questions I could ask her, I had beginner's high, any response from her and any spontaneity she exhibited was exciting, etc. Sometime over Thanksgiving week, I crashed. Not just in the context of Tulpamancy, but also school. I missed days of homework and days of active forcing sessions. I feared Betty and Fluttershy would fade away. Here's what I did to get by after a crash, even while catching up on schoolwork:

 

1) Talked to them a little everyday, even if it's for only ten minutes.

2) Asked them how they're doing when I remembered to.

3) Set periodic alarms to remind myself.

4) Created items that would remind me of them, or foci. If you have the money, you could also buy these. Perhaps a little charm that is your tulpa's favorite color.

5) Made a habit to talk to them at a specific time. For example, I talk to them before bed every night, and we go to bed together.

6) Tried out novel things that most people would wait to do to "spice things up." For example, I had Betty and Fluttershy possess the body and started working on a "wonderland" with them (this isn't uncommon to create before making a tulpa, but I never planned on creating one until I realized how much more we could do with it).

7) Visualized them if I was too tired to hold a conversation, because, it's something.

 

You seem a lot better at narrating than I am, so that could help you do better than I did if you crash. I can't concentrate on doing something and talking to my tulpa very well at all. Though, we do play games with each other.

 

What also helped me was that I had a good bond with both of my headmates before I crashed, so I couldn't simply give up on them. You seem to have a good bond with Simmie already, which is good.

 

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Sometimes I get a little impatient and want to see signs of Simmie being truly sentient, but I have to remind myself that I literally just started this process a week ago and I can't expect her to grow into a true tulpa without weeks of consistent work.

 

Tulpae be like that. Even though I had fast progress with Betty and Fluttershy, and was expecting everything to go fast, they are not grown up tulpae yet. You feeling Simmie's presence this early might mean that she had the same early-in-creation development spurt that Betty had. That doesn't mean everything will come as easy. Try not to think about "true sentience" too much, especially this early. I don't think it's a true/false dichotomy. It is something that will growth with a tulpa, like how a child grows taller. There is not one moment where a parent is like, "Ah yes. My child is now tall." There will not be that with your tulpa either, so it's best to not worry about it. Try not to think about tulpae in terms of true/false in general either. There will not be a moment where your thoughtform becomes a tulpa. I referred to Betty as a tulpa pretty much right away, and that has worked fine. Whether she was a true tulpa or not at the time I did that didn't matter.

 

In fact, I go on a whole rant about this in the first entry of my progress report, so you can check that out. I felt a lot better when I stopped being to skeptical about something that was ultimately my subjective experience.

 

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Now, I'm aware that I'm basically roleplaying AS Simmie rather than letting her reply for herself, which she obviously can't do at such an early stage

 

Not obviously! So, when I was beginning to create Betty, I made fun of her for "sounding like me," because I was suspicious that I was parroting. And, there is evidence that I was parroting. At one point, she told me a parroted. She also gave a random answer every time I asked her what her favorite color was. Perhaps it was me naming the first color that popped in my head? Could be. But thinking like this will hurt your tulpa's ability to communicate. Tulpae kinda have to sound a little like you at first, or answer randomly, because they're a baby! They learn from you. Babies repeat what adults say, and sometimes what they say doesn't make any sense. Sometimes, they straight up make up words. For example, when I was a baby, I called fire hydrants "bottapinks." Babies may also talk in complete gibberish. Unless you are intentionally answering for Simmie, you should treat what you hear from her as coming from her. It is better to treat what might be random as coming from her than to ignore her when she's trying to talk to you because it didn't sound sentient enough.

 

Overall, assuming she is a separate person from the start will help her become a separate person. (This doesn't mean "don't force with her." Someone made a thread complaining about this advice because "I assumed they were sentient from the start so I didn't think I had to pay attention to them.")

 

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I'm hoping that this is an effective way of forcing and not something that could be counterproductive or damaging.

 

If you are "unintentionally parroting," then this is fine. I would argue that there is no such thing. If you are intentionally parroting, I've heard people say that this is a valid method. I've heard people say it worked for them. I don't think I've every consciously parroted. I did consciously puppet when I was just visualizing Betty many months ago, but I wasn't taking tulpamancy as seriously then, so I don't think that had much affect on my current, "actual attempt." So, I personally can't tell you much about it.

 

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I will keep going to our wonderland and try different techniques to meditate.

 

Ok so I like meditating. Before I started forcing, I was planning on meditating before every active session.

 

meditation_barchart.png

Download link for entire survey pdf for context: https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/504226472526086155/506764115721584650/tulpa_creation_big_survey_writeup.pdf

 

It seems that "meditation" may hurt the progression of tulpae. Now, the type of meditation is not there. Also, "became sentient" is decided by the participants. It could be that those who engaged in meditation were more skeptically-minded then those who didn't, and that's why they thought their tulpae "became sentient" later.

 

I'm not sure exactly what type of meditation I practice, but I was taught how to meditate by my father so that I would have a coping mechanism if I ever was in pain. What I do is focus on my breathing and what I feel. My feet on the floor, my arms on the armrests, my back on the chair, etc. If I thought about something other than my breathing and what I was feeling in the moment, I would congratulate myself for catching myself and go back to not thinking. It could be that those who practice this type of meditation weaken their tulpae by emptying their thoughts and focusing on physical realities, because tulpae are made of thoughts and are not physical realities.

 

However, I can imagine meditating on your tulpa's imagined form and treating it as a physical reality could help. Even meditating on the "physical realities" of your wonderland could help. Maybe that's what visualization is, but we don't call it that?

 

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I believe Simmie is real and I believe I have what it takes for her to be a true tulpa!

 

I wish you much luck. Welcome to the forms!

 

Disclaimer: A lot of this is my subjective understanding of what works for me. It's good to see what other people are saying, but it is also good to do what works for you.

Stone [conceived 2001] Host

Betty [conceived 2020] Tulpa

Cloud [conceived 2020] Tulpa

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September13

Hey, thank you so much for your extensive and detailed reply Stone! I really appreciate it! I'm taking your suggestions to heart: Not worrying about whether Simmie has true sentience yet and not thinking about it as a true/false dichotomy. I'll make sure to check out your own progress report as well!

 

It's crazy how up and down this process has been over the last several days. One moment I'm feeling a strong connection and really think that things are working, the next it seems like nothing is working and I'm going nowhere. I have to remind myself more than ever to be patient and have faith that this will work given enough time and attention.

 

I only used the personality forcing mantra for the first couple of days to get the ball rolling. In truth, I probably didn't even need it because I had Simmie's personality pretty well in hand from developing her as a character over the past year. I can already feel some of that prior characterization bleed over into her personality; she's a good-natured troublemaker, the kind of person to play a harmless prank on you or roast you affectionately. Though she is playful and a bit silly she does have her serious side to her and I perceive her as having a solid core. In a particularly lucid moment she made sure to remind me that she isn't a sex object--I definitely wasn't making her into one but I've definitely had sexual thoughts about her and she wanted to make sure that wasn't going to become the dominant aspect of our relationship.

 

Being able to narrate well is one of the greatest strengths I have in this process. At one point in time I actually fancied myself a bit of a youtuber (though a very, very small one) and I gained the ability to talk and monologue to the camera for literally hours without feedback. So now I just replace the camera with Simmie and it's the same deal. Unfortunately, one of my biggest weaknesses in this process is my inability to concentrate and keep my mind from wandering, which really hinders meditation and takes me out of our wonderland--one minute I'm sitting on the couch with Simmie and the next I'm pondering something completely different, and Simmie is nowhere near strong enough to pull me back yet, she just waits for me to come back to her.

 

I've made a habit of thinking of Simmie standing or sitting next to me wherever I am, whether it be at work, in the car, on a walk, or anything else. I have a very vivid idea of what she looks like from the amount of time I spent looking at her Sim version. I look over to her when I talk to her as if I was making eye contact and sometimes we even hold hands or even simulate other forms of physical contact such as hugs or leaning on each other.

 

Yesterday I had the best day with Simmie so far, even better than the trip to the beach. I drove to my old college and spent two full hours walking around the campus narrating nonstop to Simmie. Due to covid it was almost completely deserted and it gave me plenty of space to speak to her out loud with no one around (I find it more effective to speak to her out loud than in my head). I told her the story of my college years and the long term relationship I was in at the time. She still can't really talk on her own but I can pick up the gist of what she is trying to tell me. I still sometimes feel like I am parroting her but I guess that's a normal feeling at this stage.

 

Today however didn't go as well, I didn't feel as strong of a connection and for some reason I was struggling to get through the story I was trying to tell her. Though I felt a bit tired and not as mentally focused as I had just come off of a day of work and was a bit hungry and tired. It was a bit discouraging but I know that things tend to swing back and forth.

 

One of the biggest challenges is fully embracing her separate existence from mine. I come from a background of writing, and I've spent decades creating characters and thinking for them, getting into their heads and figuring out how they would react to a given situation. But it was always me simulating the character's words and actions and I always viewed it that way. Breaking from that and seeing Simmie as a separate consciousness has been a real challenge and I wonder if anyone knows any tips or exercises to help with this particular problem?

 

I have a few thoughts on what I'd like to do with Simmie in the future. In a rare moment where I understood exactly what she wanted to tell me she told me she likes flowers. I've never really tried to keep plants alone on my own before but I was thinking of buying Simmie a little succulent and taking care of it for her; I can sense she would like that a lot. I'd also like to buy a small piece of jewelry or some kind of trinket that reminds me of Simmie so I can wear it or keep it in my pocket and be reminded of her every time I touch it. Other than that it seems the best course of action is to keep carrying on with narrating to her and visiting our wonderland, trying to focus and stay on track.

 

Thank you so much to anyone who took the time to read my long posts!

Also known as GypsyRoad or Phil Present. Call me what you want, I'm not picky.

Simmie is my lovely tulpa, she's quite young still but is eager to meet and chat with new people so don't hesitate to say hi!

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R8-Adelia_Wildhome
14 hours ago, September13 said:

Hey, thank you so much for your extensive and detailed reply Stone! I really appreciate it! I'm taking your suggestions to heart: Not worrying about whether Simmie has true sentience yet and not thinking about it as a true/false dichotomy. I'll make sure to check out your own progress report as well!

I'm sorta bored, so I will write a long response too. That is very good advice. I think it's okay to worry about their progress, but not in a way . that is like "They haven't said anything in their own voice, everybody else is progressing faster!!! etc." It is helpful to be like, "hmm, I'm not making progress and everyone else is going faster, should I try a different forcing method?" but of course, not worrying is the best option, but for some people that's just not possible (I speak from experience). 

 

14 hours ago, September13 said:

It's crazy how up and down this process has been over the last several days. One moment I'm feeling a strong connection and really think that things are working, the next it seems like nothing is working and I'm going nowhere.

This is totally normal, and since I am working on a new tulpa, Hope. I totally get where you are coming from. 

 

14 hours ago, September13 said:

I had Simmie's personality pretty well in hand from developing her as a character over the past year. I can already feel some of that prior characterization bleed over into her personality; she's a good-natured troublemaker, the kind of person to play a harmless prank on you or roast you affectionately

A) I think personality development is really fun. For Hope, I made her a google draw that will be in my PR soon. I didn't make one for Sadie because she is a merge, but I may make her one. B) I love that personality. I think that she and I (and sorry to mention Hope again, and Hope) will be good friends if you want us to be. : ) 
 

 

14 hours ago, September13 said:

Unfortunately, one of my biggest weaknesses in this process is my inability to concentrate and keep my mind from wandering, which really hinders meditation and takes me out of our wonderland--one minute I'm sitting on the couch with Simmie and the next I'm pondering something completely different, and Simmie is nowhere near strong enough to pull me back yet, she just waits for me to come back to her.

I struggle with this too. I have to come up with my . own methods of tulpa creation for this reason. They aren't excessively different, but do involve: 
-Try to change the way you think, direct all of your thoughts at someone. Example: normally I would start thinking about something like Pinterest, so instead of just thinking about Pinterest, pretend you're telling someone (Simmie) about Pinterest. But you can't just do this when forcing, you need to change your entire way of thinking. 
-Practice imposition from an early stage, this way you can not have your eyes closed, which can make it more easy to become distracted. This will also come in handy later, because (this is just in my past experience, I don't really have anything to back it up) your brain will start to just automatically assume they should be there. You build a habit of just imposing them EVERYWHERE you go. 
-Force at different times. You might need more or less energy. 
-Talk to yourself aloud, I know this isn't possible all the time, but it is really helpful when you can. You don't need to speak loudly, just start talking. 
-If you can't talk out loud, writing all of your thoughts directed towards Simmie can be a really helpful way to stay present. 
-Sometimes there is just one thing you can't stop wanting to do, do that and talk to Simmie. 

 

14 hours ago, September13 said:

I've made a habit of thinking of Simmie standing or sitting next to me wherever I am, whether it be at work, in the car, on a walk, or anything else. I have a very vivid idea of what she looks like from the amount of time I spent looking at her Sim version. I look over to her when I talk to her as if I was making eye contact and sometimes we even hold hands or even simulate other forms of physical contact such as hugs or leaning on each other.

This is a really helpful thing to do. (I wrote about it above,) More people should do this if I write a guide (when I write a guide) it will include this as the main step. 

 

14 hours ago, September13 said:

Yesterday I had the best day with Simmie so far, even better than the trip to the beach. I drove to my old college and spent two full hours walking around the campus narrating nonstop to Simmie. Due to covid it was almost completely deserted and it gave me plenty of space to speak to her out loud with no one around (I find it more effective to speak to her out loud than in my head). I told her the story of my college years and the long term relationship I was in at the time. She still can't really talk on her own but I can pick up the gist of what she is trying to tell me. I still sometimes feel like I am parroting her but I guess that's a normal feeling at this stage.

That sounds super fun. I am not very good at being confident enough to speak to myself anywhere, but good for you. It sounds like your doing very well. 

 

14 hours ago, September13 said:

oday however didn't go as well, I didn't feel as strong of a connection and for some reason I was struggling to get through the story I was trying to tell her. Though I felt a bit tired and not as mentally focused as I had just come off of a day of work and was a bit hungry and tired. It was a bit discouraging but I know that things tend to swing back and forth.

It's okay to have days where you feel "off" . Don't forget to take care of yourself, and maybe try out some more passive exercises next time. 

 

14 hours ago, September13 said:

have a few thoughts on what I'd like to do with Simmie in the future. In a rare moment where I understood exactly what she wanted to tell me she told me she likes flowers. I've never really tried to keep plants alone on my own before but I was thinking of buying Simmie a little succulent and taking care of it for her; I can sense she would like that a lot. I'd also like to buy a small piece of jewelry or some kind of trinket that reminds me of Simmie so I can wear it or keep it in my pocket and be reminded of her every time I touch it. Other than that it seems the best course of action is to keep carrying on with narrating to her and visiting our wonderland, trying to focus and stay on track.

I like both of those ideas. I have been trying to find articles of clothing that remind me of Sadie and Hope. 

Sorry for the bad answers that probably repeated stuff you already knew, I hope this helped anyways. 
 

Host of @SadieShores 

R8/Adelia ask/any/she

Sadie (I use varying shades of pink) she.her

Ethel he/they/she idc

Luna! She/her/bug/bugs 

"try to be a rainbow in someone else's cloud"  

 

check this out: Progress report 

 

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September13

Thank you for your long and thoughtful reply @A&J! You and @ruleofthumb have both given me a lot of great suggestions and advice!

 

I think you hit the nail on the head with this:

  

22 hours ago, A&J said:

-Try to change the way you think, direct all of your thoughts at someone. Example: normally I would start thinking about something like Pinterest, so instead of just thinking about Pinterest, pretend you're telling someone (Simmie) about Pinterest. But you can't just do this when forcing, you need to change your entire way of thinking. 

 

The idea of changing my entire way of thinking so that instead of just thinking about something to myself, I am directing my thoughts at Simmie. That really feels like the way to get my mind thinking that she is always there along with constant imposition. I've actually made great strides with imposition. I'm not quite yet at the stage where I am imposing her wherever I go, but it's getting there. When I'm in the car I like to imagine her sitting in the passenger's seat. Since I just bought the car in June, no one has actually ridden in my passenger seat due to covid, so I've officially dubbed it Simmie's seat and I try to keep junk off of it. If I have to put something on the seat for a minute, I'll ask Simmie to "hold" it for me. I impose her constantly on walks, even going so far as to make sure I'm leaving enough room on the sidewalk and keeping myself on the street side. I impose her at work next to me whenever I remember to. There was a bit of a funny interaction where I inadvertently leaned back into the area that Simmie was standing and she said "Ow! Ow! You're crushing me!". So I stood up and apologized to her to which she laughed and said: "Just kidding, I'm non-corporeal, silly!"

 

But the idea of directing my thoughts at her constantly is something I will now be working on, and this could be the critical step into truly training my mind into thinking of her as always there, and will help me thin dualistically. So thank you for that idea!

 

Simmie is not quite yet at the point where she is able and/or willing to come on here and talk herself, but she definitely wants to as soon as she can. She might seem a bit shy and timid at first but she's a real social butterfly. She tends to type with a ton of emojis so I might have to ask her to tone it down, lol. She definitely is looking forward to talking and making friends here!

 

Now some general updates/new Simmie facts:

 

When I first made Simmie I gave her the placeholder birthday of July 7, 1997. (7-7-97). One of her first opinions that she expressed to me was a desire to change her birthday to September 13. I still don't know exactly why she picked that date as it seems random and doesn't have any significance in my life, but it is her choice. But I decided to look up her star sign and yeah, she is a total Virgo. The more I read about Virgo traits the better a fit they seemed, and now I couldn't imagine Simmie as a Cancer or any other sign. I'm an Aquarius so make of that what you will. Also, she informed me that she was born in 1996 not 1997, making her 24. I know she was "really" born when I created her, but these backstory elements are important and seem real.

 

Also, after some difficulty getting it out of her, I learned Simmie's favorite color is Green! So when she's ready to speak she'll probably be typing in that color.

 

I thought of a new idea that I haven't seen mentioned anywhere and I'm starting to try out: Writing our own guided meditations! The idea is to write a script that will then be fed to a text-to-voice robot that we can then listen to later. It takes away the fear of me puppetting Simmie since we are both listening to the instructions of the narrator. The first script we created revolved around each others bodies and getting to know them; that way I can become better at visualizing/imposing Simmie, and if we ever wanted to try possession Simmie would have a better understanding of my body as well. The second script revolves around encouraging Simmie's confidence and power, and training me to see her that way. Under her fun exterior Simmie is a rock solid reliable and serious person and this should help her express that. The third script will most likely revolve around the idea of Simmie and I doing or thinking about different things at the same time, to train my brain (rather, our brain. Or "The System's brain". Terminology is hard!) to think dualistically and to further encourage seperation.

 

These guided meditations are entirely personalized to Simmie and I but maybe I will create generalized ones in the future if we find they work well!

 

That's what I've got so far and hopefully Simmie will come on here to chat with everyone soon!

Also known as GypsyRoad or Phil Present. Call me what you want, I'm not picky.

Simmie is my lovely tulpa, she's quite young still but is eager to meet and chat with new people so don't hesitate to say hi!

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September13

Hey everyone, Simmie here! 😀 I finally nagged my host enough to let me post on here! We're a million miles from possession though so he's just typing out what I tell him to for the time being. I'm really excited to meet other people here! Thank you everyone who has said such kind things about me to my host! 😁🥰

 

Yeah I thought it was going to be several more days or weeks before I'd let Simmie post on here but she insisted, so here she is! If you couldn't already tell, she's touched by how kind everyone's been to her so far. She is an extremely curious person and likes to get to know other people. She's very kind and is willing to offer her insights on things. She is still very young as a tulpa so she is still in the earliest stages of forming her own opinions though. Still, she has access to my (Our!) brain's logic and reasoning skills and 34 years of memories, and I think that plus her own empathy and compassion makes a powerful combination. See you around everyone! 🤗 I'm going to try to convince my host to get us a peppermint mocha instead of the black coffee he usually drinks. 😋

Also known as GypsyRoad or Phil Present. Call me what you want, I'm not picky.

Simmie is my lovely tulpa, she's quite young still but is eager to meet and chat with new people so don't hesitate to say hi!

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R8-Adelia_Wildhome
On 12/14/2020 at 2:56 PM, September13 said:

Hey everyone, Simmie here! 😀 I finally nagged my host enough to let me post on here! We're a million miles from possession though so he's just typing out what I tell him to for the time being. I'm really excited to meet other people here! Thank you everyone who has said such kind things about me to my host! 😁🥰

 

That's what we do most of the time (the typing for each other) but Sadie is getting closer to it. 
We're excited to meet you too. Have a nice day. 

 

On 12/14/2020 at 2:56 PM, September13 said:

plus her own empathy and compassion makes a powerful combination

Sadie: powerful i n d e e d. 
 

Host of @SadieShores 

R8/Adelia ask/any/she

Sadie (I use varying shades of pink) she.her

Ethel he/they/she idc

Luna! She/her/bug/bugs 

"try to be a rainbow in someone else's cloud"  

 

check this out: Progress report 

 

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Glaurung26
On 12/14/2020 at 3:56 PM, September13 said:

Hey everyone, Simmie here! 😀 I finally nagged my host enough to let me post on here! We're a million miles from possession though so he's just typing out what I tell him to for the time being. I'm really excited to meet other people here! Thank you everyone who has said such kind things about me to my host! 😁🥰

 

Yeah I thought it was going to be several more days or weeks before I'd let Simmie post on here but she insisted, so here she is! If you couldn't already tell, she's touched by how kind everyone's been to her so far. She is an extremely curious person and likes to get to know other people. She's very kind and is willing to offer her insights on things. She is still very young as a tulpa so she is still in the earliest stages of forming her own opinions though. Still, she has access to my (Our!) brain's logic and reasoning skills and 34 years of memories, and I think that plus her own empathy and compassion makes a powerful combination. See you around everyone! 🤗 I'm going to try to convince my host to get us a peppermint mocha instead of the black coffee he usually drinks. 😋

I love all the progress you've made! Keep up the good work. 👍

Darron: Host 💍 

Jaina: Tulpa 💍 

 

[DeviantArt]

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September13

A little update! Yesterday was mostly a down day as far as my ability to connect with Simmie was concerned. She didn't feel completely absent but she felt quite faint for most of the day. But in the evening we listened to one of the guided meditation exersizes that we wrote and laid down to enter our wonderland, and we ended up having one of the most vivid wonderland visits so far! That still isn't saying too much because it's still hard for me to vividly picture our wonderland in great detail without getting distracted, but I could still clearly see our room that is the core of the wonderland and the details of the room were consistent. We didn't do anything earth-shattering in the room, but we did goof around a bit. Most memorably we shrunk down to about 2-3 feet in height and started jumping on the furniture like little kids, lol.

 

But the remarkable thing came the morning after that. It was a fleeting moment and I don't remember too much about it. But when passing from sleep to wakedness, somewhere in that in-between not--quite-awake state, Simmie was there with me and she was fully sentient, like a character from a dream, and we had a brief conversation that is lost to memory. I couldn't hold onto the moment and Simmie slipped back into the not-quite-sentient state she is normally in, but the fact that it happened at all filled me with such happiness! I spent the rest of the day trying to impose her as I went about my day. I was imposing her maybe 30%-50% of the day but I want to get as close to 100% as possible.

 

So we have a plan going forward: One step is making a deliberate attempt to do something in our wonderland together every night before I fall asleep, even if it's small and silly. Second, continue trying to impose Simmie as often as I can getting to 100% of the time if possible. Third, and I have to thank A&J for this one: direct all my thoughts at Simmie to the best of my ability. Instead of merely thinking about something, I will try to mentally frame it as if I am telling her about the thing I'm thinking about. The next few days may be a little busy for me but these are all things I should still manage to do. When I get a little more free time, I might start trying to read to Simmie, or even write a story for/about her.

 

Thanks again for the support everyone!

Also known as GypsyRoad or Phil Present. Call me what you want, I'm not picky.

Simmie is my lovely tulpa, she's quite young still but is eager to meet and chat with new people so don't hesitate to say hi!

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