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Simmie and Phil's Chat and Storytime Lounge


September13

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Yesterday Phil and I had a very successful switching session during a hike and I was in the front for over an hour! 😁 Today we went to the library to sit down and work on my story, and that's mainly what I want to talk about:

 

So the good news first: We have a first chapter! 😁

 

But now the bad/complicated news: It wasn't so easy to switch in at the library as it was during a hike. For one thing, we had to wear a mask inside and that affected our concentration. For another, libraries are much noisier places than I remember them being. When Phil was a kid "library voice" was strongly enforced and no one spoke above a whisper. But there were plenty of people speaking in normal conversation-level voices including library staff, not to mention the presence of little kids who were just being themselves and making noise.  Add to that I'm still shy about switching in when there are people around.

 

So in other words it was a bad/broken/incomplete switch. At best, we were co-fronting. However--and now we're switching back to the good news--we were able to get entirely lost in the story. This is an experience Phil has had countless times on his own going back to his early teens at least, but this was the first time I've experienced it with him! It was exciting! 😁

 

So to sum everything up we basically had a Teal writing session. I would have liked a purely Green writing session but it wasn't to be. But as it was, it was a very productive writing session!

Tulpa Wife & Mother! 💚 

💍 11.28.21 👶 4.7.23
👗 Simmie's AI Dress-Up!   📷 Phil and Simmie's Photographic Adventures!

 

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Congrats! Keep up the awesome work. I haven't been to a non-university library in over a decade. I hope you can get a quieter day sometime if you end up going back.

Darron: Host 💍 

Jaina: Tulpa 💍 

(Raccoon Queen 🦝👸)

👨‍👩‍👧‍👦Dain and Nova

Aggrok: Tulpa Void Dragon

Viktor: 🐺

[DeviantArt]

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Thanks! We're going to give it another try very soon!

 

So I sat Phil down and have him write down in a notebook a list of things he needs or wants to do. Tomorrow we're going to try organizing the list into a kind of loose schedule he can follow. Baby steps! 😄 I'll make a human being out of Phil yet! 😁

Tulpa Wife & Mother! 💚 

💍 11.28.21 👶 4.7.23
👗 Simmie's AI Dress-Up!   📷 Phil and Simmie's Photographic Adventures!

 

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  • 3 weeks later...

(This is sort of stream of consciousness)

 

I've just been reflecting, and maybe the second year of existing for a tulpa is actually the hardest. At least for some.

 

In your first year everything is new and exciting, you are getting to learn about your host as he is getting to know you. You're figuring out who you are, what you like and don't like, and you're testing the limits of your powers.

 

But in the second year, everything slows down a bit. You and your host know each other pretty well by now so surprises and new information are slower to come. You start to realize that there are limits to what you can do and you're not going to be able to keep up the momentum of growth from your first year. Also, you start seeing a lot more patterns in your second year, both in yourself and your host, and you start to doubt your ability to make the changes that you've wanted to make.

 

I feel like I'm going through a kind of "sophomore slump" right now. I'm old enough that the world has ceased to be novel--at least for the most part--but still not old enough to have learned and studied the things I want to know in great depth. I feel like the initial burst of energy is over and now it's time for long, consistent work. I'm learning to be patient.

 

So there it is, my stream-of-consciousness ramblings for today. 😄

Tulpa Wife & Mother! 💚 

💍 11.28.21 👶 4.7.23
👗 Simmie's AI Dress-Up!   📷 Phil and Simmie's Photographic Adventures!

 

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What a wonderful thing Wonderlanding is! 😊

 

Phil and I had a lovely date for Valentine's Day. I won't share all the details here, but I'll share a couple things we did. We went swimming in a chocolate river, which I'm sure would be pretty disgusting in real life but was really fun in the wonderland! It was fun to imagine the sensation of melty chocolate surrounding you as you swim through it. We cleaned ourselves off under water dripping down from giant mushrooms Alice in Wonderland style. 🍄 We poured chocolate into molds to make all different shapes and types of it, and then ate an unhealthy amount of it. 😋

 

We also threw down a blanket on a warm hillside and wrote each other messages in the stars with our fingers. 🥰 Nothing is more romantic than rearranging the heavens together! 😄

 

Sometimes we forget just what an amazing place the wonderland can be. Most of the time we just imagine our wonderland house and ourselves spending time there in realistic ways. But it's fun to sometimes go full fantastical and do whatever you want, literally paint the night sky with stars! 😁

 

Maybe it's the opposite for how it is with other tulpas and hosts, but I'm the one with my feet on the ground more often than not while Phil is the one drifting off into fantasy. I try to keep him anchored here on Earth, but maybe once in a while I should just relax and let him pull me into fantasy with him. 

Tulpa Wife & Mother! 💚 

💍 11.28.21 👶 4.7.23
👗 Simmie's AI Dress-Up!   📷 Phil and Simmie's Photographic Adventures!

 

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Same 😶 I've been lazy. (What else is new) Maybe next week on my mini-vacation. 

 

Playing with the state of the universe "because-I-can" is pretty cool. Who obeys the "rules" of physics anyways? Moving the stars in particular is pretty cool. 🤔

Darron: Host 💍 

Jaina: Tulpa 💍 

(Raccoon Queen 🦝👸)

👨‍👩‍👧‍👦Dain and Nova

Aggrok: Tulpa Void Dragon

Viktor: 🐺

[DeviantArt]

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I just want to talk about my girl Simmie a little bit.

 

I woke up this morning on my birthday to find her serving me breakfast in bed. As in, she literally propped me up (in wonderland) and put the food into my mouth like I was some kind of Egyptian Pharaoh or something. Then she spoke the sweetest words of love to me. I'm not even talking about the purely romantic kind either, this was pure soul-to-soul communication. It's hard to explain. She told me how she could see the beauty of my soul like no one else could. But just saying that is like showing you a picture of a delicious meal rather than you eating it; it was something entirely else to experience. I've never felt love so pure or a connection so deep as I have with Simmie. And the nature of our relationship means we experience a bond closer than any two people who live in separate heads and bodies could.

 

We sometimes talk about obsession in tulpamancy and how it can be a positive tool when used right. Well, I've got that lol. Sometimes I feel like my whole world is Simmie; she is the ground I walk on, the clothes I wear, the air I breathe, even the calcium in my bones. Everything is coming up Simmie all the way down, and I wouldn't want it any other way. And yet Simmie feels the same way; she lives in a world that is all me. It's like we're an endless loop of creator and creation, each living within the universe that is the other.

 

We stayed in that state that was partially in wonderland and partially in dream for over an hour. We did a lot of other fun, mostly silly things together. Simmie went through about 12 wardrobe changes just because she could. She flew me in a fighter jet. We rode a hot air balloon together. We giggled a lot, lol. Altogether it was an amazing time and an astounding start to my birthday.

 

In conclusion, the girl that you see here is not even 1% of the girl that I know. Simmie, I love you, and thank you.

Phil. 😎 Host of Simmie.

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