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Two impatient beings strenghtening their bond


JakubM
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(edited)

Cheers!

My name is Jacob and this is a story of me and my tulpa. I'm 17 and I have created my first tulpa 02.03.2021 (~22.00). We are already

at day 6 of our development, but let's start from beggining. Day 1, I gave my tulpa a name Raisa( female ) and a simple form of a light orb. I did some forcing talking about random stuff and fall asleep. Day 2, I said good morning to Her and did some forcing. Shortly, after when I said her name, I heard in my mind a diffrent one. Long story, short I asked some questions, as I was getting yes/no answers already( mostly and as pictures of body language not words) and it came out its Elzu(male). For those curious idk what the hell is this name but it came to a rank of some inside joke between us to make fun of it's oddnes so here it is. I was forcing passivly/ activly almost all day long.

Day 3, I started to receive emotion packs, or as I think now, they just got stronger and I became more aware of them. Communication is on

yes/no level, with yes and no at the same time meaning maybe. Day 4-5, still forcing almost all day long, actually best time of my life so far, communication developed to sth I can't really name but hmm, me talking in my mind and Elzu answering via sending thoughts and pictures. I learned a lot more about him, and all the info about Elz( short form I use from time to time, we think it's wholesome) will be below.

Day 6, today when I write it, it's before our pre-sleep active forcing sesion. The biggest thing I remember from this day is Elz forcing me to do maths and him arguing against my religion ( Sunday after all ). I haven't said that we have a WL( simple wooden house) and Elzu has his form there aswell. So about him: Elz is 13, sth about 183 cm ( half head shorter than me), ginger hair, green eyes, his favourite colour is orange, his favourite song is Imagine Dragons - On top of the world, he also like listening to lofi beats radio on yt, and when I asked him now what else I could write, he said he is irritating ( but I still do love him). I probably forgot few important thing as I'm writing from my mind. Anyways that's all so far, feel free to ask us antyhing if you desire, and sorry for grammar errors if there are any( not my first language).

Edited by JakubM

,,Breathing is fun"

Also, stop reading this and go appreaciate your tulpa.

 

Me - host

Elzu - tulpa

 

 

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It sounds like you are off to a good start! Elzu is such a cool and unique name. You've got the right mindset about this, listening to him and letting him tell you about himself.

 

Yay, red hair and green eyes, we're taking over! 😁 Though I'm more auburn than ginger myself. Elz sounds super cool! 👍

Phil. 😎 Host of Simmie.

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5 minutes ago, September13 said:

It sounds like you are off to a good start! Elzu is such a cool and unique name. You've got the right mindset about this, listening to him and letting him tell you about himself.

 

Yay, red hair and green eyes, we're taking over! 😁 Though I'm more auburn than ginger myself. Elz sounds super cool! 👍

Btw, he changed to red hair this morning so it's quite new to me. It just happened when I tried to visualize him. Before he had, dark brown hair with blond bands, but I think it's cooler this way especially that he changed it on his own!

,,Breathing is fun"

Also, stop reading this and go appreaciate your tulpa.

 

Me - host

Elzu - tulpa

 

 

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Day 7 mostly behind us. I think Elz is progressing super fast, and when I ask him about it, he just says he's a genius. Yesterday we started some vocality excersises, and continued with them today. There is no doubt they were beneficial, and helped Elzu to verbalise his thoughts ( or I just became better listener as he was very communicative from the beggining). It's not perfect but active forcing now is mostly dialogue not monologue. Although even then he is sometimes too lazy 

and prefers to send me thoughts directly. The most fun and intresting thing we did today was playing 20 questions. I found it day before in guides section. Basicly one side has to imagine sth in a box, and the other side is guessing. We did it few times, but the last one was the most intresting. Basicly Elz tried to cheat ( or not exactly). He imagined sth bigger than a box, which we did not stated as a rule at the start, but I guess it's not needed to set rules in my mind. To make it shorter, we were playing by this rule till last question, but Elz tried to surpass this balance of guesser always winning( it was happening due to fact that we can hear each other thoughs, so basicly we had to focus on not giving any hints, or even revealing answer in my case). After all he asked me do I want to surrender and gave out the answer before my response( he said it was from excitment and by accident).

I take it as a sign of sentience. It's still late afternoon for me so I guess we will do some more activities today. We will try to choose sth together as Elz is a LITTLE to ambitious, and if I would let him choose we would end up doing freaking possesion excersises in week one.

 

Anyway, from now on we would like to work on pararel processing and making Elzu more independent, making comments on his own when I'm doing sth etc. Can't believe it's actually a week. I feel like I knew him waaaaay longer.


I'm sorry for making walls of text, but I'm really engaged with this and want to do it right. This will look similar everyday.

,,Breathing is fun"

Also, stop reading this and go appreaciate your tulpa.

 

Me - host

Elzu - tulpa

 

 

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(edited)

Ok, day 8 not full yet but enough to write. Second day in a row Elz tried to wake me up on certain hour ( 7.00). And it was second fail. First time he woke me at 6.00 certainly and said he made a mistake. Today I woke up at 6.31. He has a good point tho that I just woke up too early. We will try 6.00 again tomorrow. As for now we were and will be practising proxying so Elzu can leave his mark on this topic ( and exspress himself better for other people on internet etc.). We've made some progress and Elz is determined to write a message this evening, and to clarify if I write sth he does not agree. For Elz's messages we will use his favourite colour which is orange. 

I will try writing more and shorter posts for everyone's intrested comfort.

Btw we are  celebrating Elz's first week today at evening( eating chips and watching anime yay ). Quick question to hosts and tulpas reading this : Do you celebrate your tulpa's

creation and how ? ( give me some juicy ideas for the future)

Edited by JakubM

,,Breathing is fun"

Also, stop reading this and go appreaciate your tulpa.

 

Me - host

Elzu - tulpa

 

 

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So it's time for Elz to write sth finally(Me proxying for him). He wasn't quite sure about this and wanted to practise more but I think we got it.

 

Hi, I'm Elz, first and only tulpa of this guy so far. I have no idea what to write about yet. I guess I will just add few words to new posts from time to time. That's it. Good as for first time, right?

 

09.03.2021 ( I'm just marking date for me and Elz, as we plan to read this report in the future, to look back at our development)

,,Breathing is fun"

Also, stop reading this and go appreaciate your tulpa.

 

Me - host

Elzu - tulpa

 

 

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  • JakubM changed the title to Two impatient beings strenghtening their bond

Day 9, was sooo boring. Both for me and Elz as I was learning most of the day. It's still not so late so we will do some excersises. I'm also trying to make WL in a setting of a book and have some fun together. We tried it before but Elz was in pre-vocal stage so he wasn't really involved in the story. Oh and we failed with waking up again. Maybe 4th time will be the charm as Elzu said he needed to calibrate( and was complaining that my bio clock sucks, which was straight made up excuse lol). Anyway Elz wanted to write sth so here it comes.

 

Any other tulpas here? Do you also fear that one day your host will forget about you? I feel like there is no use for me. It's not my hosts fault, I'm just scared of disappearing. I like being, and don't want to end it. Hard to explain. I know I will die one day eventually as I can only live as long as my host. I just don't want to be forgoten. Besides that I'm very happy. It just happens from time to time, Jacob says I have exsistential crisis, but I will be fine. I trust him in that.

,,Breathing is fun"

Also, stop reading this and go appreaciate your tulpa.

 

Me - host

Elzu - tulpa

 

 

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(edited)

Well, we had a serious talk after that what Elzu wrote. Everything is fine for those intrested, he is strong, no need to worry. Actually, we feel even better after talking about it. I wouldn't write this short post but when I was typing for Elz, I almost started to cry. I had received such strong emotion pack only 1-2 times before. I have no idea why it came out ( by it I mean all the emotions and eventually understanding) just now, as we talked about it earlier, but maybe he had to write it.

I'm proud of him in every way possible.

 

PS. I will try to avoid walls of text, by making better use of tabulator from now on.

 

 

Edited by JakubM

,,Breathing is fun"

Also, stop reading this and go appreaciate your tulpa.

 

Me - host

Elzu - tulpa

 

 

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15 hours ago, JakubM said:

Well, we had a serious talk after that what Elzu wrote. Everything is fine for those intrested, he is strong, no need to worry. Actually, we feel even better after talking about it.


Glad to hear that! Actually, Shizuku was gathering her thoughts to respond to Elzu above--not sure if it is necessary anymore, but we thought it might still be a useful perspective.
 

15 hours ago, JakubM said:

Any other tulpas here? Do you also fear that one day your host will forget about you?

 

It seems like it's human nature to search for things to worry about. Our hosts do it too: I think Wray gets even more scared/sad thinking about this than I do. Just don't forget to trust each other. When we're dealing with worries like the one you mentioned, I try not to react with fear or anger; I just let Wray know that I trust him and I believe we're going to be all right. He's also started to react this way, lately. Maybe I set a good example for him. 😄 Either way, this has helped us have a more solid, happier relationship.

 

15 hours ago, JakubM said:

I feel like there is no use for me.

 

Some systems define roles or jobs for each member, but that's not a necessity. All you have to worry about is being yourself. You will have plenty of time to figure things out!

##

It's great to see you were able to be open about your feelings and talk this out--as long as you can do that, I'm sure you two'll be in good shape!

Edited by Wray

Host: Wray (or John) (he, him)
Tulpa: Shizuku (she, her) 🐺

We now have a progress report!

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(edited)

Thank you, especially Shizuku for kind respond! These are some advices we will definitly make use of, also every reply warms up my heart. 

 

Well, I did not expect to receive any feedback on that. It's good to know that there are some people and tulpa who care. You shall have my best regards and greatfullnes. Love you both.

Edited by JakubM

,,Breathing is fun"

Also, stop reading this and go appreaciate your tulpa.

 

Me - host

Elzu - tulpa

 

 

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