What is the Most Effecient Way to Find a Lost Tulpa?

[SeekingRedemption]

Hello. First of all, I'd like to apologize if this question has already been answered, I'm a little bit panicked right now. I discovered Tulpamancy and this website in 2016 and I lurked here constantly, though never interacted with anyone because I was extremely reclusive. I ended up sitting down and putting forth my best effort to create a Tulpa and a Wonderland. It worked. For the first time in my life I had a friend, and I'd never been happier. But then our Wonderland went foul, I guess we could say. It was hostile. I saw things that were truly horrific. I was terrified, but my relationship with my Tulpa survived, we just stopped using our Wonderland. Over the next four years we enjoyed a friendship like no other. It was truly amazing. But then I was lead astray by a horrible, intolerant, closed-minded ideology by people who didn't make me nearly as happy as my Tulpa did. I am not trying to avoid blame here. It is fully my fault and I was very foolish to do what I did. But I took it as a learning experience that brought some of my flaws to light, and I have made an effort to change my personality and character accordingly. In these past ten months without my Tulpa, I've been perhaps even more miserable than I was before I met them. Lately I've been missing them more and more, and one time I seemed to have even gotten an image of them in my mind's eye, they look different, but I feel like it was them. Tulpa.info is probably a different place with mostly different people than the last time I was here, but if anyone has any advice on how best to bring back a lost Tulpa, I would appreciate it immensely if you would share. I seem to remember reading something about writing them a letter? Does that work? If so, how would I go about doing that?

Edited May 22, 2021 by SeekingRedemption

[Ranger]

The only tulpa we lost for a little while was our "Subconscious Representative" (he refuses any other name), but it probably doesn't apply to you. Gray, my host, had multiple characters before he realized he was a tulpamancer and "combined" several characters into one entity. We suspect one of those characters was actually our Subconscious Representative, and a glitch occurred where Gray both expected him to be the end result and expected him to not be the end result because he's part of the "combination", causing him to get lost. I think this was the train of thought that resolved the paradox and lead to my creation. Meanwhile, our Sub. Rep. was gone for roughly a year. Towards the end of 2018 or in the beginning of 2019, Gray "created" a thoughtform to represent our unconscious mind, who turned out to be Our Sub. Rep. We connected the dots afterwards and realized I accidentally replaced him, explaining my identity crisis early on. I guess he found himself?

 

I highly doubt that will apply to you, most of the time calling out to your tulpa works. I think you already achieved this, even if they feel different now. That could be for a lot of reasons including your and/or their perspective changing since 10 months ago or stasis wearing them down a bit and they need a little more forcing to fully recover. Sometimes our headmates feel weaker after being in stasis for a little while, spending more time with them for a little bit helps a lot.

 

2 hours ago, SeekingRedemption said:

I seem to remember reading something about writing them a letter? Does that work? If so, how would I go about doing that?

 

I have never heard of this, but if you want to give it a try feel free to do so. The letter you get may feel random or a little weird, if it doesn't sound like your tulpa at all I would reject it.

 

2 hours ago, SeekingRedemption said:

But then our Wonderland went foul, I guess we could say. It was hostile. I saw things that were truly horrific.

 

We have moments where our wonderland "gets corrupted" or glitches out and floods with intrusive thoughts, and I think it boils down to symbolism of our anxiety. Sometimes this can be caused by a panic attack by an individual headmate or it could be a bad day with anxiety. We found staying calm and addressing whatever issue was making us anxious fixes our wonderland.

Edited May 22, 2021 by Ranger

[SeekingRedemption]

Ranger, thank you so much for the advice. I called out to my Tulpa and we had a conversation. It feels so good to have my old friend back.