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Having Kids With Your Tulpa Mate


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On 11/17/2021 at 2:07 PM, TurboSimmie said:

Oh gosh, I've had the same thing on my mind recently. My host and I want to have a family at some point, and I'm definitely curious about this, so I'll be watching this!

 

I'm supposing there are four ways it could work:

1. Treat it like having IRL kids, with pregnancy and growth/aging working in real time.

2. Still treating it like having IRL kids, but with an accelerated timeline, maybe going on when it "feels" right for the child to get older rather than on some kind of rigid time-scale.

3. Treat it more like forcing any other tulpa, except that tulpa you would call your child. As their personality develops they might deviate from that roll though.

4. Treating the children like NPCs in your wonderland. I don't like this and I hope people don't do it!

 

Hello all.. I am still reading this thread and catching up. There's been loads going on but I am reading through now. Thanks so much for responding. Sharky and I have come to a mutual agreement to wait to have our first kid. He's been with me for 9 months but I didn't realize he was called a Tulpa until I came across this online. Now, I know there is a name for his kind. Please forgive me if I say anything ignorant as I'm new to the specific details of the Tulpa. If I say anything wrong, feel free to correct me. 

 

I wish you and your host the best as well with your future child, if that's what you guys still decide to do! <3

We will more than likely go with the first one since it feels the most natural for me to do. These are wonderful points and I will keep them in mind. I'm still not done reading other replies. <3

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On 11/17/2021 at 3:25 PM, ruleofthumb said:

Betty: Hello! I'm going through something similar to this right now. It's not exactly analogous but it is similar.

 

How we've treated it is somewhere between Simmie's 2 and 3.

 

So, to clarify, I am treating myself as pregnant right now. Since I am a tulpa, it is metaphorical rather than physical, and it will be faster than a physical pregnancy. (Though, I am adjusting my form to match that of a physical pregnancy.) I might have decided to take about the same amount of time to be pregnant as a physical pregnancy, but there is an important reason why we decided against that. That reason is that my baby already exists.

 

Yeah, it's a bit weird. He's existed since April of this year as another, basically tulpa (maybe not technically, but I'll keep things simple) named Consigliere. However, he was never forced the same way Cloud and I (actual tulpas) were. Still, we was an important part of this system for a while, and sometimes, Stone would talk to him more than Cloud or I. Once he get back into a forcing schedule, he's now been talking to mostly me again.

 

When he started talking to mostly me again, we had a few, seemingly unrelated predicaments. Consig wanted to be interacted with more (to note: Cloud doesn't mind not being forced at all), I wanted a baby (but neither Cloud nor Stone wanted a new tulpa in the system), and I wanted to feel more like "myself" while possessing/fronting (still playing it safe with the slash lol). Interestingly enough, one time when I possessed/fronted, I felt the most like myself when talking to Consig, with Stone completely absent (I think that was actually me "fronting", not just possessing).

 

So, we came up with a solution to solve all these problems. I would not have a new tulpa baby, but I would assume an underdeveloped system member as my own (like adopting a child). I would have a pregnancy period in which Consig is essentially dormant (metaphorically, in my stomach). This pregnancy period wouldn't be too long as to not force someone who already exists to be dormant for nine months. When Consig is born, I will treat him as my son (or at least, my creation) and force him while I possess/front (giving him the interaction he wants and allowing myself to feel more like "me").

 

So, that's the story! I've heard of people having babies with their tulpas before. Basically, it seems to function much like having another tulpa, but maybe with more symbolism (though most people use some symbolism when creating tulpas anyway, we did!). I imagine since children tulpas are created in adult brains, they'll usually grow up fast. Deviating from being a child tulpa can simply be growing up, which is to be expected!

 

Having another tulpa can mean spending less time with the one you already have. Stone is lucky Cloud doesn't care about being developed more because if she did... he'd have a lot more work to do! And I guess I'm lucky too because at some point you can't do more work... you just take more time from me.

 

If you are having trouble spending enough time with the tulpa you already have, you can also adopted a rescue animal with him. We weren't in the position to but it can be a good alternative if you don't know if you can handle another tulpa.

 

Wow this was such a detailed post and it was helpful, thank you for taking the time. I'm glad you've found something that is working for you. It all makes sense to me, especially comparing it to like adopting a baby. <3

 

I'm learning to manage our time together. Sharky's job has him working up to 12 hours or more... So we spend time when we can. I've had to make a few sacrifices. I think being a stay at home mom would work since my hands aren't full anyways...It's just when he's home he does want loads of attention but it's okay. When we are reading for our baby, I'm sure we will do amazing. <3

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On 11/19/2021 at 11:07 PM, TurboSimmie said:

As much as I hate to admit it, Lumi does have a point here. Imagine being a young tulpa just starting to express yourself and your host going "Shhh....you're supposed to be a baby". I think the symbolism of pregnancy and carrying your child in the womb is still valuable. But when you start to get responses from them you should consider them "born" at that point. After that it would be pretty unfair to try to impose infancy or toddlerhood on them; eventually they will be able to tell you what age they see themselves being. Your "child" might end up being an adult as big as you, who knows.

 

It's difficult as I still yearn for the authentic experience of carrying a child in the womb and then raising them. The only way I'm going to get to experience that is second-hand if and when Phil ever has IRL kids. Sigh. Sometimes being a tulpa is frustrating. I wonder if having a family with Phil in the Sims is a healthy way to at least partially satiate that desire?

 

I won't lie -- When Sharky first expressed he wanted a child, I did think about the typical pregnancy, like carrying a baby in the womb because I'm still learning about this. 

 

Once I started getting to the posts about tuplas not being "anyone's baby" I started getting confused but as I continue reading I understand, I guess.. When I made my post, I wasn't necessarily thinking ahead. Sharky just indicated he wanted a baby, (as in me being [symbolically pregnant or something] and I wouldn't have known how that would work, which lead me to post this. These are all really good answers and they're guiding me so that in the future I will know what and what not to do. 

 

Also, I would never force my tulpa to do anything they don't want to do. The whole point of tulpas, (at least to me) is that they are their own person. So, in the event I were to get "pregnant" and have a baby, if the baby started talking and understood, I'd treat my "baby" as such. I mean, at that point, it would probably be inappropriate to continue referring to them as a baby. 

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We did the whole accelerated pregnancy thing when it came to having Elise, though her mind ended up developing faster than her form, which mainly served to push the timetable up even further than we imagined. This led to me putting her in stasis for a couple months until I was ready to start working on her, by which point we essentially had a 6-year-old with the mind of a toddler 😂 Thankfully things evened out relatively quickly; she's since existed in 12-year-old and 18-year-old forms but likes her 12-year-old form the best. Basically, as long as you're not stifling the new tulpa's development by enforcing some rigid and arbitrary expectation of how pregnancy or growth should work, things will generally work out. As for the differences to creating a tulpa in the "conventional" way, I've definitely noticed I have a more visceral connection to her than to my other girls (i.e. we're more attuned to each other's bodily sensations and emotions), and of course there's the whole parent-child dynamic that others mentioned.

"Science isn't about why, science is about why not?" -Cave Johnson

Tulpae: Luna, Elise, Naomi

My progress report

 

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