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A tulpa that exists before its creation?


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(edited)

Excuse my English, I speak Spanish and using the translator.  What I wanted to tell is something strange that started to happen to me.  I am a girl but in certain periods of time it gave me a very strong dysphoria.  I felt like he was a boy but after a while that feeling went away.  After several times the same thing happened to me, I came to the conclusion that when that happened to me, it was not really me.  I realized because my tastes, beliefs and personality changed when this happened.  I had several theories that it could be but I wasn't sure.  A few days ago I had a strange dream, what happened in the dream is not the important thing, the important thing is that at a certain moment of the dream a male silhouette appeared that emanated a green Aura and at that moment the name Dexter came to mind .  That same day, Kya, (my first tulpa) and I decided it was time to create a second tulpa.  This was a boy, together we designed him both in physique and in personality.  When I finished I began to live with him and everything was normal until at a certain point, in a chat in my head, he told me that he existed since before I created him.  I asked him his name and he told me that his name was Dexter.  He told me some more things (if you want me to tell them, say so in the comments).  He spoke fluently and even his physique, personality and voice deviated almost completely from what was planned.  I am happy to have it but it intrigues me quite a bit.  Did something like this happen to someone else?

Edited by mdreams
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To be quite likely unhelpful, I can tell you that I've seen DID/OSDD systems discover alters through dreams. They'd dream about the alter, and then when they'd wake up, they'd discover a new alter. There's also such thing as headmates introjected from dreams (although this doesn't really fit your experience from what I understand), which we've experienced firsthand.

I'm Adagio, a tulpa! I'm part of a very big system. There's three of us using this account right now.

Blue text is a headmate called TGS (their initials). They are currently dormant.

Green text is headmate named Tiki.

[Progress Report]

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2 hours ago, Adagio said:

Para no ser útil, puedo decirles que he visto a los sistemas DID / OSDD descubrir alteraciones a través de los sueños. Soñarían con el alter, y luego, cuando se despertaran, descubrirían un nuevo alter. También existen los compañeros de cabeza introyectados de los sueños (aunque esto realmente no se ajusta a tu experiencia por lo que entiendo), que hemos experimentado de primera mano.

That's very interesting, I didn't know it, but I don't think Dexter is an alter.  Rather, he appears to be a more advanced tulpa than he should be when he was created.

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14 minutes ago, mdreams said:

That's very interesting, I didn't know it, but I don't think Dexter is an alter.  Rather, he appears to be a more advanced tulpa than he should be when he was created.

Our dreamtive is also not an alter in our system either. They don't necessarily need to be an alter; it was just my example /nm.

I'm Adagio, a tulpa! I'm part of a very big system. There's three of us using this account right now.

Blue text is a headmate called TGS (their initials). They are currently dormant.

Green text is headmate named Tiki.

[Progress Report]

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4 hours ago, Adagio said:

Nuestro  sueño  tampoco es un cambio en nuestro sistema. No es necesario que sean un alter; era solo mi ejemplo / nm.

A while ago my tulpa told me that he believes this happened because of my identity crisis.  Not being sure who he was, I unconsciously separated that part of me as if it were something alien and that's how he created himself.  As if it were a way to protect my identity.  I don't know if he's very scientific but that's his theory.

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Stone: Tulpas can exist before deliberate creation, either as tulpas or as something else. For example, my headmate (I'll call him a tulpa so it doesn't get lost in translation, but I'm not sure if he is technically a tulpa) named Consigliere was a character I created before he became a tulpa. Also, tulpas based on characters from books, TV, dreams, or other origins can exist as memories and thoughts about the character before becoming tulpas. Tulpas exist in your brain so they can have memories of themselves before their creation if the brain has those memories. Your tulpa can also just be based on that feeling you used to get.

 

Also, you mentioned dysphoria, and you mentioned that you are a girl and that you got this boy feeling that later became a tulpa, so unless something is getting lost in translation, I'm assuming you were talking about gender dysphoria? I'm not saying this is you, but a trans person creating a tulpa who is the opposite gender of them and then transitioning to that opposite gender later is very stereotypical. It seems like creating a tulpa is sometimes the brain's way of safely exploring a different gender identity.

(Different colors were used before July 10th, 2021. Check our profile for dates.)

🌊 Stone uses blue

🔥 Betty uses orange

☁️ Cloud uses gray

🌲 Consigliere uses green

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On 11/24/2021 at 11:49 AM, mdreams said:

 I felt like he was a boy but after a while that feeling went away.  After several times the same thing happened to me, I came to the conclusion that when that happened to me, it was not really me.

 

Labeling a past experience as a tulpa and not you is not a great mindset. If you believe past versions of you or old experiences belong to another person, that can lead to problems moving forward. For example, if you believe your school memories belong to one person and your work memories belong to another, what memories belong to you? My fear is you won't know who you are anymore and create a lot of tulpas you don't want.

 

Dysphoria or a desire to be male or female doesn't have to define who you are. I believed I am a boy, but I decided I was wrong. I was stressed out and I felt depressed. Changing my mind made me feel better. My desire to be male is not another person, instead I am one person who decided I am not transgender.

 

On 11/24/2021 at 11:49 AM, mdreams said:

He spoke fluently and even his physique, personality and voice deviated almost completely from what was planned.  I am happy to have it but it intrigues me quite a bit

 

Dexter is probably a "walk-in", he is a baby tulpa. The second tulpa you create can be very easy to create and seem developed.

 

I don't know if Dexter was created outside of your awareness. If you think your dysphoria was another person, it's possible Dexter was created as a result.

 

I may be wrong. Gray, my host, thought I was a different tulpa. However, Gray's identity is unaffected no matter what we decided.

 


 

(Side note: I'm sorry if my response's wording is weirder than normal. I'm worried the way I normally write can confuse a translator. I also rewrote my post after feeding through Google Translate a few times)

I'm Ranger, Gray's/Cat_ShadowGriffin's tulpa, and I love hippos! I also like cake and chatting about stuff. I'm not sure if I like Rosalind or Rosalin better, but you can call me Roz.

My other headmates have their own account now.

Temporary Log | Switching LogcBox | Yay! | Bre Translator

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