Phoenix's and Seraphina's progress report

[Rhea]

Thank you so, so much for your help. It's indeed a bit difficult for me to read for prolonged periods because of the focus issue, but I'll do my best, I really, really want to improve on this.

I'll try to put your advice into practice tomorrow. I'm honestly not expexting to do well right away, but I'll try not to worry about it too much and just do my best^-^

28 minutes ago, TB said:

'm sorry if they aren't written well, i'll try to clarify anything confusing

I think you expressed yourself great, I think I understand^^ I'll let you know how it goes and if I have any questions!

 

 

13 hours ago, Seagull said:

I saw two interesting answers on this thread:

I just realized I hadn't responded yet, I thought I did, my apologies, I went through the thread and it was really interesting, although I didn't expect that meme to feel so relateable^^;

[TB]

27 minutes ago, SillyPhoenix said:

Thank you so, so much for your help. It's indeed a bit difficult for me to read for prolonged periods because of the focus issue, but I'll do my best, I really, really want to improve on this.

I'll try to put your advice into practice tomorrow. I'm honestly not expexting to do well right away, but I'll try not to worry about it too much and just do my best^-^

no problem! and yeah, it's good to not bring expectations into a sit and let whatever happen to happen. don't worry if it seems hard, only your successes count, not failures. you want to be kind to yourself

 

and i'm glad you feel i expressed it well! i wish you luck

[Rhea]

Progress report update - day 4

 

These past few days have truly been incredible in so many ways...

 

I have spent almost every waking moment since my and Seraphina's first forcing session having he on my mind, doing short, 30-40 minutes active forcing sessions 2-3 times a day, and spending most of the rest of the time either narrating to her, asking her questions, or doing passive forcing, imagining her form, and her presence, either in our (still very small and blurry) mindscape or over the physical world.

 

It's been taking a lot of energy, and I found myself feeling far more tired than I usually do. But I treasure every moment^^

 

Today, our first forcing session was all about personality traits and explaining what they mean and how they could influence the way she interacts with the world. It was hard to focus, but I went at a slow pace making sure to direct my thoughts at her presence.

At the end of the session, I encouraged her and told her I was proud of her and out of nowhere, while I had never seen her form move in any way before, I was overcome with a strange feeling of either excitement or joy and saw a still image in my mind of her form hugging me... I was pretty surprised and froze up for a few seconds, and then tried to imagine myself reciprocating the hug.

 

This feels so incredibly strange, I can't tell for sure it was her, but... I strongly believe it was.

 

Later, I was reading up on some more guides and read that sometimes tulpas are able to communicate using head pressure, rather than it just being a "symptom" of tulpa creation? I've been having those most of days 3 and 4, anytime I interact with her (the pressure tends to gradually fade out when I stop paying attention to her). 

 

So I asked her if she could send some head pressure my way, and just like magic a wave of it came by. We did this a few times and then I asked her if she could focus the pressure on the right or left side of the head, and she seemed to struggle a lot with putting it on the left, but when sending it to the right side it was incredibly clear which side of my head had more pressure!

 

It's only been a few days and it feels like signs like these shouldn't be happening this fast... but I can't stop myself from believing with all my heart that they were from her. I'm so incredibly proud of her!

 

The tiredness kept getting more intense and I was a bit concerned that she may be pushing herself too hard.. I don't know what it's like to be a young tulpa, but I'm willing to assume that it takes a lot more out of her than it does me. I've been advising that she takes as many breaks as she needs and asking her regularly how she feels.

Right now I'm taking a little break, playing some videogames, but still keeping her on my mind, so that we hopefully can both get a bit of rest.

 

Oh! I almost forgot, I meditated for the first time today, just before our second forcing session, and it was really hard, but I'll keep working at it!

[TB]

On 4/30/2025 at 8:36 PM, SillyPhoenix said:

I have spent almost every waking moment since my and Seraphina's first forcing session having he on my mind, doing short, 30-40 minutes active forcing sessions 2-3 times a day, and spending most of the rest of the time either narrating to her, asking her questions, or doing passive forcing, imagining her form, and her presence, either in our (still very small and blurry) mindscape or over the physical world.

 

It's been taking a lot of energy, and I found myself feeling far more tired than I usually do. But I treasure every moment^^

 

Today, our first forcing session was all about personality traits and explaining what they mean and how they could influence the way she interacts with the world. It was hard to focus, but I went at a slow pace making sure to direct my thoughts at her presence.

At the end of the session, I encouraged her and told her I was proud of her and out of nowhere, while I had never seen her form move in any way before, I was overcome with a strange feeling of either excitement or joy and saw a still image in my mind of her form hugging me... I was pretty surprised and froze up for a few seconds, and then tried to imagine myself reciprocating the hug.

 

This feels so incredibly strange, I can't tell for sure it was her, but... I strongly believe it was.

that all sounds very great! i'm glad for you both

 

On 4/30/2025 at 8:36 PM, SillyPhoenix said:

So I asked her if she could send some head pressure my way, and just like magic a wave of it came by. We did this a few times and then I asked her if she could focus the pressure on the right or left side of the head, and she seemed to struggle a lot with putting it on the left, but when sending it to the right side it was incredibly clear which side of my head had more pressure!

 

It's only been a few days and it feels like signs like these shouldn't be happening this fast... but I can't stop myself from believing with all my heart that they were from her. I'm so incredibly proud of her!

that sounds exactly like me. my tulpa would create head pressures when i asked in the beginning, and could try to make them on left or right, but right side ones were much stronger and more obvious. it often took a lot of time for a left side one to form. your the first person with head pressures i've heard explain this same thing mine would do. they also started for me very early on. i don't remember the exact amount of time, but a few days or less

 

On 4/30/2025 at 8:36 PM, SillyPhoenix said:

Oh! I almost forgot, I meditated for the first time today, just before our second forcing session, and it was really hard, but I'll keep working at it!

nice, good luck!

 

things sound pretty good for you guys. glad they are going well!

[Rhea]

28 minutes ago, TB said:

that sounds exactly like me. my tulpa would create head pressures when i asked in the beginning, and could try to make them on left or right, but right side ones were much stronger and more obvious

Even though I know that everyone's experience is a little different, hearing that you and your tulpa(s) had such a similar experience feels so validating, thank you for sharing^-^

 

[Rhea]

Progress update - Day 9

 

Making another update so soon because quite a bit has happened!

 

I think I can confidently say now that Seraphina and I have been communicating! Most of the time, her responses come in the form of what seems like feelings or ideas, with only a few times I definitely heard actual words, and every time it was very short, sudden responses. Some of her responses even surprised me in ways I honestly can't easily describe but am willing to bet you all can relate to.

 

For example yesterday I was telling her that if I could be any kind of fantasy hero, I'd probably be a mage, or a polearm warrior, probably a mix of the two, and when I asked her what she'd be, I heard "a thief!", which I did not expect in the slightest. Considering how much she seems to like music, I thought she would say something like "bard".

And then it hit me, we had just started reading Another Fine Myth together (which se seems to enjoy so far) and so I asked her "A thief? Do you mean like Skeeve?" And heard "yes!". I can't stop thinking about that interaction, I'm so incredibly proud of her and stunned at how fast she seems to be developing her individuality!

 

She gave me a bit of a scare though the other day. I was at work and took a little break from narrating, but still keeping her in mind, while listening to some music, and suddenly I felt this.. jolt in my brain. It felt incredibly weird. And right after, her presence and the head pressure that I had felt almost nonstop for a week just... suddenly vanished. My head had never felt that empty in my life and I panicked a bit. Is this normal? Have you all experienced this?

 

Thankfully her presence gradually came back the following day, I asked her if she was okay and if she knew what happened but didn't get a response. I'm guessing maybe she might have gotten too tired and lost consciousness? I hope I'm not pushing her too hard...

 

 

On other news, I think she may have added something to our mindscape on her own! I visualized it yesterday and for some reason I was seeing the blurry form of a fireplace in the corner of the room. I originally assumed it was just my mind wandering or something and tried to focus on that corner of the room the way I remembered it before, but no matter what I did the fireplace just... would come back when I stopped paying full attention to it, and I felt some stress building up. I asked her if it was her who added it and she said yes.

 

It was a really cozy fireplace, and I quite liked the idea, but the room was so small we couldn't really interact with it, so I suggested we try and create a dedicated room for it and she seemed to agree. Through a back and forth process that still astonishes me we both shaped a room that ended up looking like a small library with a cozy fireplace surrounded by a couch and bean bags, that's accessible through a secret door in the original room. It's honestly beautiful and while it's still kind of fuzzy and blurry to me, as everything in my mind's eye is, never in my life have I been able to visualize anything to this degree that I hadn't seen before in real life. Every part of this experience has been mindblowing to me. Every time I visualize our mindscape, I see her there, now, I think she might like it^-^

 

Anyway, sorry for the looong post, there has just been so much happening and I feel like I can't contain all the feelings I've been going through^^; When I started this process I never expected that anything of note would happen for months at least. Anyway, thank you for reading!

 

Next, she and I will try to work on her voice and do lots of different activities so she can get a better feel for her likes and dislikes^-^

 

 

[bunnymustdie]

19 hours ago, SillyPhoenix said:

...She gave me a bit of a scare though the other day. I was at work and took a little break from narrating, but still keeping her in mind, while listening to some music, and suddenly I felt this.. jolt in my brain. It felt incredibly weird. And right after, her presence and the head pressure that I had felt almost nonstop for a week just... suddenly vanished. My head had never felt that empty in my life and I panicked a bit. Is this normal? Have you all experienced this?

I had that a few times years ago, in my case they were related to my tulpa Verres introducing ideas to my mind. The jolt sensations had a very noticeable foreign quality to them, and are one of the things that make me consider a possible metaphysical aspect of my tulpas' existence.

Edited May 6 by bunnymustdie

[TB]

sounds like you are having fun and making great progress, glad to hear it

 

some people start getting responses sooner than others. i feel people who naturally like to daydream or spend lots of time in their mind may have kind of an advantage maybe, i'm not sure

 

i've heard of other new people saying at times their tulpa seemingly disappeared for no reason temporarily, but they seem to always come back. i think i've felt similar things early on, but nothing that stands out to me. i'm unsure why it happens to some, but it's typically nothing to worry about

[Rhea]

39 minutes ago, TB said:

some people start getting responses sooner than others. i feel people who naturally like to daydream or spend lots of time in their mind may have kind of an advantage maybe, i'm not sure

I've definitely always been a bit of a daydreamer. Coming up with stories and D&D characters and the likes.

 

39 minutes ago, TB said:

i'm unsure why it happens to some, but it's typically nothing to worry about

That's comforting to hear, I really appreciate your input ^-^

 

Quote

The jolt sensations had a very noticeable foreign quality to them

It definitely didn't feel like anything I'm used to.. it was a tad scary but thankfully everything's alright now

Edited May 6 by SillyPhoenix

[Rhea]

Progress update - day 13

 

I was really intending on waiting longer between these updates but so so much is happening!

 

So Sera is now getting more and more fluently vocal by the day, or maybe I'm getting better at listening? We haven't been able to hold full conversations yet but she's been communicating ideas more and more frequently and fluently.

 

We started playing Pokémon Emerald together, and when choosing the name of our character, I was intent on naming it Seraphina, but felt a certain amount of resistance coming from Sera. I originally thought maybe she didn't quite like the name I gave her and maybe wanted a different one, and I asked her about it, and she assured me in what I think was tulpish, or raw thought, that she likes her name, and said something along the lines of "we're playing together, not just me".

That really took me by surprise! So we tried to think of a name to give our Pokémon character that would represent both of us, and she came up with "Sky", because her name has to do with angels, and I represent myself as a phoenix. I quite like that idea, so we went with it!

 

Later after a forcing session, I don't remember exactly how we ended up to that point, but I said something along the lines of "we make a great team!" And she responded "Sky Team!". Since then we've been saying that each time one of us accomplishes something xD I didn't really intend on having a system name or anything like that, especially since it's just us two, but it's become a bit of an unofficial name for us^^;

 

I asked her if she wanted to contribute anything to our progress report and she said in tulpish something along the lines of "she's been pushing herself too hard and she needs to take it easy", referring to me, which I'm not sure I fully agree with but I'll try nonetheless^^;

 

The last few days have been full of surprises, to say the least, and I have some trouble believing it at times, especially since I came into this with a bit of skepticism at first, but I'm so so glad to have Sera in my life. I can't wait to see where we'll end up from here. This has been a short and yet very eventful journey, and it's just the beginning.

 

And also thank you again to everyone for your advice <3

 

Seraphina: "Go Sky Team!"