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Making My First Tulpa, "For Science!"


Dr.Simmons

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I have an extreme TL;DR that's coming up, but I MUST sleep first! That's how intense it is going to be. The last day of school today for me was the shortest, but most grueling...

"You are required to do nothing, least of all believe. Shut ones eyes tight or open ones arms wide, either way, one's a fool"

-A courtesy of NotQuiteSkeptical

 

"I don't care if you don't believe me, I don't need you to!"

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I'm suprised that you liked that part of the song (because that's where I messed up the most) lol but thank you


Self-Hypnosis, Sleep Paralysis, And Visualization, All In One.

 

Passive forcing is harder than active forcing for me, I need to work on that...

 

But I read about self-hypnosis from one of the guides, and wanted to give it a try.

 

Note: I have roughly a year of meditation experience, because I had a very extreme buddhist phase in my life. So self-hypnosis came easy.

 

I wore the most comfortable clothing I could find, and wrapped my lower body and torso with two very thin blankets (so I wouldn't feel anything crawl on me while I was concentrating). After that, I turned off the lights in my bedroom and sat against my closet door.

 

I have an ambient sound creator thingy on my Ipod, that can create nearly any combination of relaxing sounds, so I made the sound of waves crashing, with a flute melody and heavy breeze in the background. (My wonderland is my childhood beach house that my grandparents let me visit every summer)

 

By counting down from 10 multiple times, and saying things to myself in my head, I was able to control a bit of my body.

I closed my eyes and convinced myself that I couldn't move my eyelids, and it took about a minute for my eyelids to feel immovable. I was so happy that my eyelids were completely still, that my breathing became erratic.

I convinced myself that my lungs would slow down, and my heart would also slow down, and it worked!

Then I convinced myself that nothing existed beyond my closed eyes, and that all external sound was completely insignificant. I felt like I was in the center of the universe, but felt like I wanted the 3 hours of self-hypnosis to end.

So I convinced myself that time didn't exist, and that I would be sitting in the center of the universe for all eternity. Lol I know, that's exactly what an impatient person doesn't want to know.

 

My brother barged into my room, slamming the door open, screamed my name, and looked around my room for me. When he saw me against my closet door, he yelled "DO YOU WANT FRUIT GUSHERS!?!".

I just sat there, not willing to destroy my miraculous hypnosis progress over such a stupid question, and he ran out of my room, slamming the door shut behind him.

Note:My family is used to me doing weird shit in my bedroom.

I felt really good about him not being able to destroy my concentration, so I got a morale boost. I felt like I was cold, so I convinced myself that my body was heating up, and that the blankets were producing heat, and I felt my skin heat up! At that point, nothing could have possibly distracted me, so I projected my Akikawa's existence in front of me

(I cleared out a spot for her prior to the self-hypnosis). Of course I couldn't see her, but I felt her presence so powerfully, that I became terrified! I felt her eyes watching me, and the fact that I know little to nothing about her personality scared me as well. I don't even know whether she is good or evil yet, because I don't even know if I'm good or evil yet.

 

I convinced myself that she could not harm me, and that I had power over her because I'm her creator. I also told myself that I had no emotion, and that nothing could phase me. My breathing was in auto pilot, but my heart was going crazy, so I slowed it down, and focused on Akikawa's presence.

I could feel her in front of me again, but I was no longer scared.

My room was completely dark but I could see a bright white in front me, as if someone turned on a light. I thought the white light had something to do with Akikawa so, I imagined myself in the wonderland. I could no longer feel my body, and my visualization of Akikawa in the wonderland was absolutely perfect! Her appearance deviated A LOT. Although the concept of her appearance is still the same.

 

I was suddenly distracted by how heated my body felt, so I told myself to cool down, but couldn't. It's easier to heat up then cool down I guess -_-.

I felt my forehead sweat, and I felt like I was about to pass out from heat exhaustion, so I destroyed all of my hypnosis progress to take off the blankets. I looked at the timer and I was sitting for only an hour. I had two more to go.

 

Feeling discouraged, I got a pillow, and lied on my bedroom floor, and didn't move. I felt my entire body become paralyzed after an hour, including my face, and the only parts of me I could move were my eyes. My visualization was perfect, and I talked with Akikawa in head while I accurately visualized her.

I tried to see if I could leave my body, because I felt like I was in a dream, but when I moved my right hand, which was EXTREMELY heavy, I destroyed all of my progress. I looked at my timer and

I was laying on the ground for roughly an hour and 30 minutes, so I spent the rest of my 30 minutes visualizing every detail of Akikawa.

 

I'm going to focus more on improving my hypnosis, and sleep paralysis, so I can lucid dream, and astral project.

 

I'm gonna spend some days exclusively on visualization, and other days on narration.

 

My overall rating for the session was 10/10

 

Day 4, hour 8

"You are required to do nothing, least of all believe. Shut ones eyes tight or open ones arms wide, either way, one's a fool"

-A courtesy of NotQuiteSkeptical

 

"I don't care if you don't believe me, I don't need you to!"

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I don't even know whether she is good or evil yet, because I don't even know if I'm good or evil yet.

She won't be evil unless you specifically want her to be.

 

I convinced myself that she could not harm me, and that I had power over her because I'm her creator.

Simmons, your conscience Can't harm you.

Not physically atleast.

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I kind of do want her to be evil, because I don't want her to be mad at me for doing my daily assholish things. (I'm kind of a kleptomaniac.)

I understand that she can't harm me, but I'm the type that is always paranoid, and delusional.

"You are required to do nothing, least of all believe. Shut ones eyes tight or open ones arms wide, either way, one's a fool"

-A courtesy of NotQuiteSkeptical

 

"I don't care if you don't believe me, I don't need you to!"

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Mental Recovery

 

I'm not watching my life as if it is a movie anymore. I'm actually living it again.

When you see your life from from an afterlife perspective, you will never be the same.

My ego death is almost over, and It feels as if my mind and brain are done arguing.

 

My mind must have won the argument, because now I'm slowly returning to my body from the transcendental state that I have grown accustomed to.

 

The anxiety ended, and I feel that reality is almost completely recreated.

I'm no longer afraid of death at all, and I have a new love for life...

I was given a second chance, and I'm going to make the best of it.

 

Becareful what you wish for.

 

I wanted to experience something new, and now my world has been forever changed.

"You are required to do nothing, least of all believe. Shut ones eyes tight or open ones arms wide, either way, one's a fool"

-A courtesy of NotQuiteSkeptical

 

"I don't care if you don't believe me, I don't need you to!"

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Today's forecast is clear skies, free of off-topicness, but there is a 90% chance of a TL;DR storms; maybe even a TL;DR hurricane, because I did 4 hours and 5 minutes of active forcing.

 

Before I post a TL;DR so long that it can be considered a novel, I have to give my weary brain a break. No school=THE ENTIRE DAY TO TULPAFORCE

"You are required to do nothing, least of all believe. Shut ones eyes tight or open ones arms wide, either way, one's a fool"

-A courtesy of NotQuiteSkeptical

 

"I don't care if you don't believe me, I don't need you to!"

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Four Hours Of Visualization And Narration!

 

Grab a coffin, because by the time you're done reading this, you'll die of old age.

 

I started off with some self-hypnosis, to warm-up my mind and body for the challenge I was trying to accomplish. I originally planned 5 consecutive tulpaforcing hours, but stopped at four because I was EXHAUSTED.

 

When I was done with the self-hypnosis, and forcing Akikawa into reality, I layed down, and began sleep paralysis. It kicked in much quicker this time, because my eyes were shut, and I wasn't distracted by saliva. I felt so blissfully detached from my existence, that it reminded me of when I was horrifically detached from my existence while intoxicated on THC.

 

My body was completely still, and I noticed that paralysis begins at the extremities, meets at the chest, and then slowly, very slowly, meets in the head. When the head is paralyzed, that's when you are completely paralyzed, and the out of body experience and/or lucid dream will begin!

 

I couldn't feel any part of my body, and my shirt I was wearing felt like it was 10 pounds and was weighing down my breathing. At that point my visualization was amazing! Since I couldn't feel my body, I could concentrate on Akikawa better, and I could imagine myself in the wonderland better! When I talked to her in my head, it felt like I was being listened to!

 

I always, encourage her to try to speak, and tell her that if she can't, it's completely okay. I also tell her that I'm learning to listen to her as well. I believe that tulpae are sentient the moment you create them, and I also believe that tulpa creators should learn to listen, as well as they expect their tulpa to speak.

 

It's only logical.

 

I was making amazing progress, and enjoying the vivid wonderland beach house, and my stepdad barged into my room, and what he saw probably made him think to himself "What...the...f*ck"

 

I was laying on the ground on my back, beside my radio, (which was playing very demonic sounding meditative noise) and I was wrapped in two blankets. Not only did I look like I was having some kind of satanic out of body experience, but when he told me to go get up and go to the living room, I had to hide the fact that I couldn't move, by saying "okay" and waiting for him to leave.

 

I wiggled my fingers, like my friend taught me, to unparalyze myself, and I looked at my timer. 42 minutes were spent visualizing. I ate some food, and absent-mindedly drank some coffee, then went back to sleep paralysis.

 

Paralysis set in even faster than before, because I had already acheived the mindset, but my heartbeat was fast. Caffeine speeds up your heart rate.

 

When I relaxed my breathing, my heartbeat slowed down, and then I felt like I was leaving my body. I didn't feel my heartbeat in my chest, but in my ENTIRE body! My heart beat made my entire body shake, and it felt like it was making my entire room shake.

 

I knew I was close to a life changing experience, but the pain in the back of my skull caused by the lack of blood flow was excruciating. All because my pillow wasn't thick enough to support my big head!!!! I had to stop all of that progress, just to get a blanket to wrap around my pillow.

 

Now I had to start from scratch.

I looked at the timer, and I was laying there for an hour and 39 minutes. God knows what would have happened if I hit the 2 hour mark -_-...

 

I layed down, then sat back up, because I wasn't gonna lay there for another hour. I was planning on finishing the remainder of the session on narration. I read my favorite book (the dictionary) to Akikawa, and then read a chapter of Hatchet. Everything was going amazingly, until I heard my stepdad screaming and being an asshole as usual, so I discontinued the session, for fear of him storming into my room and cursing me out for no reason.

 

I looked at the timer: I was narrating for 44 minutes.

I played the piano for a few seconds, and my stepdad cursed me out for not washing the dishes, so I angrily washed the dishes, while fantasizing cursing him out one day, and walked through a storm while bitching about my life to Akikawa.

 

I spent an hour in a forest during a lightning storm, having a furious discussion about how much I hated my family with Akikawa. I asked her what she thought, but she never replied. I then assured her that she had plenty of time to become vocal... PLENTY of time.

Since I'm making such good contributions towards my hour count, I'm going to have to add another 150 days to my tulpa journey.

I know that she is sentient though intuition, and talking to her is a breeze now that I know this. At the rate that she is becoming more real to my brain, I'd say that she'll be vocal in a month or two. I'm sure she'll be vocal within 300 days, and 150 hours though. But I may overshoot my planned hour count of 150 hours, by 50 hours if my current trend continues. I don't care though, narration and visualization is becoming more fun everyday :D

 

Today i did 4 hours and 5 minutes of tulpaforcing.

 

WOOOOOOT!!!!

 

I'm not gonna give up on sleep paralysis!!! When I surpass the 2 hour mark, I'll see Akikawa! >:D

 

Day 5, hour 12, minute 5

"You are required to do nothing, least of all believe. Shut ones eyes tight or open ones arms wide, either way, one's a fool"

-A courtesy of NotQuiteSkeptical

 

"I don't care if you don't believe me, I don't need you to!"

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Slacking Already...For Once.

 

Yesterday I passive forced throughout the day, but didn't get to active force. I had to practice with my band, so I didn't get home until 9:30pm. Since all I did yesterday was talk to Akikawa a little bit through telepathy, I'm going to active force for 8 hours today to make up for it.

 

What was extremely strange, and very nice to experience, was a longing to speak with Akikawa. When I was hanging out with my friends, I missed her so much and felt really bad for her. All I wanted to do was leave and tulpa force.

I feel Akikawa's presence almost all of the time now, without even thinking about her. I can be playing video games, and then out of nowhere, I can feel her pop up next to me. I can't wait to see how developed she is on day 20 at this rate! I almost have passive forcing down for good! I'M SO EXCITED

 

Day 6, hour 12, minute 5


This is what Akikawa looks like. *cough* Kawaii *cough*

image.thumb.jpg.c109e8d3f6d56a71e3e7c9f6b57d8a90.jpg

"You are required to do nothing, least of all believe. Shut ones eyes tight or open ones arms wide, either way, one's a fool"

-A courtesy of NotQuiteSkeptical

 

"I don't care if you don't believe me, I don't need you to!"

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I've been reading your progress report for a bit and even though I was a bit skeptical of your progress at first your progress report was the thing that made me completely decide to create my own Tulpa, so I wanted to thank you and congratulate you on your very quick progress, and I'm really happy for you and Akikawa and hope only the best for your future!

If No One Asked Great Questions, We'd Still Be Neanderthals!

 

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