_sapphirerose_

Someone please help?

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I started forcing at the very end of June. Everything was going well until I saw a clone of my tulpa in our wonderland at the beginning of August. I panicked a little, and I told my boyfriend about it. He has a tulpa so I figured he would know what to do. He said to stop active forcing for a week. I did exactly that and it was fine. My tulpa was by my side every day and she seemed happy. Except the last day, she seemed to just disappear. My boyfriend told me she might come back in a few days. It's been 3 weeks and I don't know why she isn't back. I can't passive force without applying so much effort, and when I do, she doesn't do anything unless I make her, which requires more effort. When I active force, weird things happen and I can't think and I have to leave. For example, this one time a few days ago I was forcing, and a giant boulder came rolling in and I couldn't control it so I left for a while. I feel like my tulpa is no longer with me. It seems like she doesn't love me anymore, doesn't want me. I spend almost everyday crying to her, asking her where she is. I know I'm not going to get an answer because she was never really able to talk. She's talking less than she used to. She comes by my side for maybe about 5 min once or twice a day, but then she leaves. I can't feel her presence. I can't feel anything. It feels like she abandoned me. She feels weak and fuzzy and I don't know why. I'm scared. I don't want to lose her. I want to be there for her but I don't know where she is, or why she's gone, or when she's coming back. Does anyone know whats wrong? Please help me. I've been a nervous wreck these past few weeks.

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Firstly, you should realize that going through anxiety isn't going to make anything better. Being in a nervous wreck prevents you from concentrating and focusing more on your tulpa. I know things feel hectic, but remember, she's there in your mind, she's within the confines of your mind, she's only gone if you believe she is.

 

Secondly, you have to realize that in order to have your tulpa move fluidly, the initial stages of them moving might be awkward because you're giving so much conscious effort into acknowledging them moving. The only way to climb over that barrier is to keep pushing your mental capacity, if you cringe at anything that requires more effort, you don't get much progress. And those initial months are going to be the irritating stages because we have to learn why persevering despite of the failures until we get good at it is so important.

 

The thing is, you have to realize that in order to get things down unconsciously, you have to acknowledge the actions consciously and keeping at it until you see it happen naturally. Don't worry about things feeling as if you're parroting or puppeting her, at some point, it's going to transcend into unconscious competence.

 

You have to be willing to keep pushing yourself, and you can do this by doing gradual increments and learning how to be patient. These things don't just drop down like an Atom bomb, take your time, take a breather, and just start from visualizing her and working your way up. Whether it's seeing a clone or some random boulder, or anything random, just learn how to calm down and see things for what they are, and know those random things won't last forever.

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Linkzelda gave some good advice.

 

Here is my honest opinion:

Your imagination is running a little wild, that's all. It's running even more wild because the more anxious and stressed out you get, the less control you have over your thoughts. Not to mention you already think that this is so terrible, that you're fear of it is just fueling the fire.

 

Because of all of these things going on in your mind, your link to your tulpa is probably a little hindered. The stress, fear, anxiety you're going through is also affecting her. Reach out to her, apologize for being so out of whack, and ween yourself back into your wonderland. When you see something like the clone, look at it head on and tell yourself, and it if you feel the need 'You are not real'.

 

Retake control of your imagination and everything will be okay. Now go tend to your stressed tulpa. Good luck!

 

Also: Don't worry about parroting/etc. It's also just adding to your fear. Force as you normally would, be patient and work with her, she will become sentient if she isn't already. These things do take time, but it's no biggie when you're going to have her for the rest of your life. Make the creation process fun, no need to stress.


New? Need Knowledge? - List of Guides - Creative's Creation Handbook

Have you hugged your tulpa today?

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Linkzelda gave some good advice.

 

Here is my honest opinion:

Your imagination is running a little wild, that's all. It's running even more wild because the more anxious and stressed out you get, the less control you have over your thoughts. Not to mention you already think that this is so terrible, that you're fear of it is just fueling the fire.

 

Because of all of these things going on in your mind, your link to your tulpa is probably a little hindered. The stress, fear, anxiety you're going through is also affecting her. Reach out to her, apologize for being so out of whack, and ween yourself back into your wonderland. When you see something like the clone, look at it head on and tell yourself, and it if you feel the need 'You are not real'.

 

Retake control of your imagination and everything will be okay. Now go tend to your stressed tulpa. Good luck!

 

Also: Don't worry about parroting/etc. It's also just adding to your fear. Force as you normally would, be patient and work with her, she will become sentient if she isn't already. These things do take time, but it's no biggie when you're going to have her for the rest of your life. Make the creation process fun, no need to stress.

 

Do you think she can help calm me down? Maybe she would give me some calming thoughts to think about? She isn't able to do much right now because she's barely developed enough, but she is able to put random thoughts in my head. Do you think if I ask, she will help?

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What I did to get back one of my runaway tulpas was send another tulpa after her.

 

 

Maybe you could have a servitor search for her if all else fails..

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Do you think she can help calm me down? Maybe she would give me some calming thoughts to think about? She isn't able to do much right now because she's barely developed enough, but she is able to put random thoughts in my head. Do you think if I ask, she will help?

 

Well, she's probably just very confused and stressed. I'm going to suggest that you approach her with nothing but positivity, vaguely explain yourself, and then tell her that you need her to help you and you can both work together to make things all better. I've found through working with my own tulpa, that the best approach in problem solving, is a positive and psychological one. (Just as it is with another person, it seems so obvious, no?) Important points I feel would really help the situation:

 

1) You are coming to terms with the issue.

2) Apologize, explain that you were afraid only because of how special she is to you, and you want to be the best host possible. You just panicked.

(These are to draw her in, and comfort her. Remind her of her importance and why you got so stressed over this in the first place. If she has a better understanding, she'll empathize more with you.)

3) Identifying her as a part of the 'team'. 'We' 'Us', etc.

4) Telling her that you will both improve and grow together.

5) Explain that first though, you need her help to clean up the mess, and it would make both of you ('us') very happy.

(Put emphasis on her importance, boost her confidence, you want her to believe that you two are going to be partners, and work together. This should be very motivating to her as well as help vanquish her doubts. Remember, she's as doubtful and scared as you are.)

6) Reassuring her that all is well and this isn't a big deal, and again that you're sorry and you didn't mean to scare/stress her.

(Reassure her to keep the positive tone, fixing this isn't impossible, this is do-able, and you're both going to work through it with ease. Remove the preconceived notion that this is the most horrible thing ever out of her mind.)

 

I'm going to give an example of a positive tone for 1, 2.

"Hey ****, I know things have been pretty chaotic, but things are going to get much better starting right now. I'm so sorry that these things happened in the first place, as silly as it sounds I was only afraid because of how important you are to me. I want to be the best host that I can be for you."

 

It is very important that you approach her with confidence, because she's only going to be as strong as you are. You are her greatest influence, especially early in development. Yes, she can help you, and there's no doubt in my mind that she will. But first, you have to take the lead. You don't have to write her a speech, just put emphasis on those points I've listed in any order that works for you. (End with positivity and reassurance.)

 

If you want to be REALLY personable and make a connection, (this may also show that you really 'mean it'), you can write it out in the form of a letter, and 'offer' it to her. Write it, call her over, tell her 'I've written something for you', and read it to her aloud. This isn't necessary, but it could help rekindle some of your bond since you're taking time out of your day to write her something nice, and be a little more convincing because you've put more thought into it.

 

Wishing you both the best of luck, I know you can make things better.


New? Need Knowledge? - List of Guides - Creative's Creation Handbook

Have you hugged your tulpa today?

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What I did to get back one of my runaway tulpas was send another tulpa after her.

 

 

Maybe you could have a servitor search for her if all else fails..

 

I don't have another tulpa, and I don't plan on making another one for at least 2 years.


 

Well, she's probably just very confused and stressed. I'm going to suggest that you approach her with nothing but positivity, vaguely explain yourself, and then tell her that you need her to help you and you can both work together to make things all better. I've found through working with my own tulpa, that the best approach in problem solving, is a positive and psychological one. (Just as it is with another person, it seems so obvious, no?) Important points I feel would really help the situation:

 

1) You are coming to terms with the issue.

2) Apologize, explain that you were afraid only because of how special she is to you, and you want to be the best host possible. You just panicked.

(These are to draw her in, and comfort her. Remind her of her importance and why you got so stressed over this in the first place. If she has a better understanding, she'll empathize more with you.)

3) Identifying her as a part of the 'team'. 'We' 'Us', etc.

4) Telling her that you will both improve and grow together.

5) Explain that first though, you need her help to clean up the mess, and it would make both of you ('us') very happy.

(Put emphasis on her importance, boost her confidence, you want her to believe that you two are going to be partners, and work together. This should be very motivating to her as well as help vanquish her doubts. Remember, she's as doubtful and scared as you are.)

6) Reassuring her that all is well and this isn't a big deal, and again that you're sorry and you didn't mean to scare/stress her.

(Reassure her to keep the positive tone, fixing this isn't impossible, this is do-able, and you're both going to work through it with ease. Remove the preconceived notion that this is the most horrible thing ever out of her mind.)

 

I'm going to give an example of a positive tone for 1, 2.

"Hey ****, I know things have been pretty chaotic, but things are going to get much better starting right now. I'm so sorry that these things happened in the first place, as silly as it sounds I was only afraid because of how important you are to me. I want to be the best host that I can be for you."

 

It is very important that you approach her with confidence, because she's only going to be as strong as you are. You are her greatest influence, especially early in development. Yes, she can help you, and there's no doubt in my mind that she will. But first, you have to take the lead. You don't have to write her a speech, just put emphasis on those points I've listed in any order that works for you. (End with positivity and reassurance.)

 

If you want to be REALLY personable and make a connection, (this may also show that you really 'mean it'), you can write it out in the form of a letter, and 'offer' it to her. Write it, call her over, tell her 'I've written something for you', and read it to her aloud. This isn't necessary, but it could help rekindle some of your bond since you're taking time out of your day to write her something nice, and be a little more convincing because you've put more thought into it.

 

Wishing you both the best of luck, I know you can make things better.

 

Thank you. It makes sense now because, She talks the most while I'm falling asleep, and a few nights ago, she said it's hard for her to work with me. I understand what she meant now. However it still doesn't explain why she went away in the first place. I tried to be patient, but I worry a lot and I get scared easily. I'm still new at this, and I'm not 100% sure if I know what I'm doing. Thanks for helping me though. It means a lot to me.

 

Also, I don't like to consider myself as her host. That word just doesn't work with both of us. We like to think of ourselves as sisters/ best friends, even though we know we are much more than that. That's not bad, right?

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Thank you. It makes sense now because, She talks the most while I'm falling asleep, and a few nights ago, she said it's hard for her to work with me....

 

Well, there are a few reasons why she might have 'disappeared'.

- You could have just stressed yourself out so much you weren't able to see her.

- She was just stressed out and didn't know what to do, perhaps she felt powerless.

 

There's nothing wrong with 'sisters' or 'best friends'. :) It's whatever works for you. If anything, reminding her that you are her 'sister' might be even more empowering to her. You'll work through it, no biggie. Just be patient and positive, and things will end up just fine.

 

What's ironic, is that I tend to worry a lot too (about physical-world based issues). I've developed Mathias in a way to where he is the 'wise' half of me, he'll usually reach in and know just what to say to help me slow down. If you continue to feed to her that she has the -power- to help you, she'll be more prone to -believing- that she can help you, and in turn will do more to help you through your problems.

 

Happy I could help! ^^


New? Need Knowledge? - List of Guides - Creative's Creation Handbook

Have you hugged your tulpa today?

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A servitor isn't necessarily a tulpa.

 

It's a temporary non-developed "tulpa" made to serve a purpose or complete tasks, etc.

 

That sounds kinda mean. I don't think I want that.

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