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Archer's Tulpae, or How I Learned To Love Headaches


Archer

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And once again, school and other obligations has prevented me from visiting the site in a while.

 

I'll probably forget things to mention, but let's see here...

 

My tulpae are able to wake me up in the morning sometimes by sending a mental bolt of energy; that's nice. Possession is coming along slowly due to how little I actually am able to force, but is doing pretty good for the said amount of time. I have gotten better at hearing an actual mind voice from my tulpae, especially when waking up. Nothing else really, except that I gained and subsequently broke up with a girlfriend.

My Tulpae:

 

Source: White floating teardrop form with two black eyes. Playful, curious.

Quill: Human Male. Sarcastic, but serious. Main voice of group and moral compass.

Felice: Female human. Quiet, sweet.

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  • 1 month later...
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And another long time since my last update...

 

I have been able to force pretty consistently for the past few weeks until recently, which has lead to much progress me and my tulpae. I have been thinking a lot about the existential implications of tulpae, and haven't made much progress in that regard. Eventually, I gave up on it; I have my whole life with them to sort things out. The headaches returned, but have subsided since. I've tried possession/switching during my forcing spree, but I have trouble with my mind's built-in security, and my heart rate increases with excitement whenever I sense progress.

 

Something neat has happened over the past few weeks. I don't know when exactly it happened, but all my tulpae have become a great deal more independent from my consciousness. One sign was a certain remark Quill made out of nowhere. Though I can't remember what it was exactly, I knew that it was very much his own thought. Felice has become the one with the most dynamic personality, and has also been the one to most deviate from her personality base, and for the better as well. We have been unsure with limits on how– er, "physically" close to act to each other. Which reminds me of something that my tulpae have helped me to discover about myself.

 

Felice is very affectionate, as in hug-every-ten-minutes affectionate. This would be weird to most people, especially to a reserved guy like me. But I found that I enjoy her constant contact. This naturally caused me to think deeply, which I do with everything in my life, and it's like this: I too show much affection through hugs and back rubs and whatnot in my family and with that girlfriend I had for exactly four days. The problem is, I don't get much of that back. My mom and sisters get annoyed if I hug them more than once per day and my dad is of course at work until 5:30, and they usually don't return the gesture. I understand this, and don't hold anyone at fault. But, as Felice was made to be my comfort and emotional support, she has... adapted to be more affectionate in this way.

 

If one were to meet Quill in real life, one would be see him as very grouchy and hostile; he knows this. Despite this, he occasionally cracks jokes of the sarcastic nature and only acts like he does because he wants to see me improve. It's very strange, yes, but he's always right on matters concerning morals and the like, even if I like it or not.

 

Source is still Source.

My Tulpae:

 

Source: White floating teardrop form with two black eyes. Playful, curious.

Quill: Human Male. Sarcastic, but serious. Main voice of group and moral compass.

Felice: Female human. Quiet, sweet.

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  • 3 weeks later...

I have just realized that it has been a little over six months since I started on my tulpae, and I am happy with how things are. I've read over my whole progress report so far and see something that is more like a journal– something that I've always wanted to start but never had the motivation to do so. It's funny, really, here I am posting on a public forum some of the more personal aspects of my life and being pretty okay with it. I feel comfortable here talking about myself because there is almost no outside influence among the community, at least in the way that we only want to help each other without any bias or ulterior motives; that is for a different time and place.

 

I have also watched my progress report turn from a list of notes, to a log of events, and finally to something that reads like a story but is at the same time entirely true.

 

Well, enough with the sappy stuff, back to my progress report.

 

I have gotten along well with feeling the touch of my tulpae, and Felice smells of strawberries I've decided. Quill has improved on his guilt-tripping techniques and Source keeps getting funnier. I would like to share a couple of incidences concerning Source that stand out in my mind.

 

I was working on an assignment for school when I hear a loud and high-pitched sound emanating from somewhere. It's hurting my head and I have trouble locating the origin. I turn to Source and say, "Source, do you hear that?" He just stares at me for a couple of seconds before abruptly popping into little white bits (yes, he survived.) Another gag happened today at a pool that my family went to. The water was incredibly cold, so much that Quill even raised an eyebrow when he stepped in and Felice shivered. Source floated to the top in an ice cube, cartoon style.

My Tulpae:

 

Source: White floating teardrop form with two black eyes. Playful, curious.

Quill: Human Male. Sarcastic, but serious. Main voice of group and moral compass.

Felice: Female human. Quiet, sweet.

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  • 3 months later...

Over two months since my last post and ten months in... huh.

 

Summer vacation has ironically left less time for me to type into this progress update, but there are quite a few things that I'd like to state. First, Felice gives excellent back rubs/scratches, and continues to be a great support whenever I'm feeling down.

 

Quill is the most attuned to possession, or something like it. I worked at my dad's company for a few weeks over the summer, of which was very labor-intensive (I'm so glad my career path is computers). At one point when I became very slow and sluggish, Quill says to me, "can I take over?" He then proceeds to co-pilot my mind. My exerted grimace turns into a blank face characteristic of Quill, I stop complaining, and I work at "full power," as if I had just started working. I call this phenomenon, "tulpa boost," and it was a great asset during the days I worked.

 

I also have a servitor named Guard, whose purpose is to command the forces of my mind. He has the form of a fictional sci-fi soldier of my creation.

 

[Warning: Personal Stuff Ahead]

Some time a few weeks ago, I messed up at something that I had been fighting for about two years. [redacted]

 

Never make Felice cry. [redacted]

 

[redacted]

 

[redacted]

My Tulpae:

 

Source: White floating teardrop form with two black eyes. Playful, curious.

Quill: Human Male. Sarcastic, but serious. Main voice of group and moral compass.

Felice: Female human. Quiet, sweet.

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  • 1 year later...

It's been a little over a year since I started my tulpas. Things are well.

My Tulpae:

 

Source: White floating teardrop form with two black eyes. Playful, curious.

Quill: Human Male. Sarcastic, but serious. Main voice of group and moral compass.

Felice: Female human. Quiet, sweet.

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Reisen: Always good to see people check back in and say they're doing well. People tend to leave and not come back, and then we don't know if they and their tulpas are fine or if they gave up or anything.

Hi guys, plain text is just me now! We've each got our own accounts: me, Tewi, Flandre, and Lucilyn. We're Luminesce's tulpas.

Here's our "Ask Thread", and here's our Progress Report (You should be able to see all of our accounts on the second page if you want)

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