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NesterBones

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Can you hear them audibly, as described by G|d39n here:

 

"Yes. I'm able to hear her as though she's an external sound. For those who haven't experienced that with their tulpae yet, it's a little bit like listening to a binaural recording--not a binaural beat, but like a 3D sound recording you'd find on Youtube, such as the Virtual Barbershop. That is to say, it's an external sound that can come in from various directions, but the source sounds very close, like someone speaking directly into your ear. I sort of wonder if this effect will be diminished and normalized through imposition."

 

?

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Can you hear them audibly, as described by G|d39n here:

 

"Yes. I'm able to hear her as though she's an external sound. For those who haven't experienced that with their tulpae yet, it's a little bit like listening to a binaural recording--not a binaural beat, but like a 3D sound recording you'd find on Youtube, such as the Virtual Barbershop. That is to say, it's an external sound that can come in from various directions, but the source sounds very close, like someone speaking directly into your ear. I sort of wonder if this effect will be diminished and normalized through imposition."

 

?

 

The most I've heard audibly was singing. Espeon sang once with me while I was driving. I haven't heard anything audibly from him since. Kass on the other hand, I've heard sing a few times. She first sang Wonderwall by Oasis with me and has sang that again as well as some other songs with me. I do want to experiment with her to see if she can do it when the music isn't playing behind us. At one point while singing Wonderwall by myself I thought I could hear her singing faintly, but I'm not entirely sure. Kass's voice can be best described as a bit of a mix of

and
and it did feel a bit like the Virtual Barbershop.

 

We're going to go for their imposition first, then actively work on their audible voices since we think it might be easier that way.


Also, I've been trying for a while now to describe a sort of ability Kass has, but I couldn't think of it. Espeon I already gave the ability to teleport from the start so I knew he could do that. I just remembered today how I used to love watching the show Charmed and how white lighters in the show could warp around through a power called orbing. Whenever a character would orb in or out of a scene, they'd sort of turn into a collection of blue lights and either dissipate and the character would vanish with them or congregate and form the character. While I've been feeling Kass's presence with me when I go somewhere, I hadn't really been paying attention to how she'd get through walls and doors and such. Today I did pay attention and saw her, for all intents and purposes, orb from one side of the wall/door to the other where I was.

 

is a decent video someone made demonstrating the effect in Adobe After Effects. The sound is the same from the show, but Kass doesn't make a sound when she does it or I would've noticed sooner or at least recognized it faster. I'd imagine now that I've associated this warping she does with the orbing from the show, the sound effect will come in time.

My ramblings and that

 

Host: Rob

Tulpa: Kaylee

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I just had an experience. I feel Kass is a lot deeper than Espeon or I thought. She told me she wanted me to feel what she does when I play Hey Sexy Lady (Skrillex Remix) for her. I don't really know what to call what she did, but it was phenomenal. I already have a pretty fun visualization going on when I listen to a song, but this was way different. I encourage anyone with a tulpa who could possibly do something like this, do it.

 

It was kind of like a possession, only she took over part of my brain, kinda like when she or Espeon want's me to write for them. The best way I can describe it is she hijacked my emotions while the song played and substituted them with her own.

 

Before I go any further, I'll describe my usual visualization during the song for comparative purposes.

 

When the song starts off, I relax into the beat and can imagine myself playing the song much like how Kass does it with her instrument. As it picks up, I see the girl singing as a kind of 3D model head singing and a scene of a car from the bumper perspective speeding through a city at night with fast motion effects. At the bass drop, it's similar to the beginning beat and I can see a clash of random images that seem to fit the mood. As the song repeats its cycle, the visualization also starts over with a few minor changes. The song ends with the 3D model slowly shutting down and the ending groan is made by a Ron Jeremy-esque man sitting up in a bed in an apartment in the city like he just woke up from some nightmare.

 

That'd be my internal music video for this song.

 

Now it's her turn.

 

The opening is a menagerie of neon reds and blues, bouncing in beat with the song. The voice is now synced by neon tadpole-like things that hop around this black void between the other lights, making more neon ripples wherever they bounce off this invisible surface. As the vocals start in their proper order, the lights fluctuate with each syllable. When the computerized voice speaks, the male singing voice is represented as a molten and melting sketching mannequin, and the computer's words are materialized over it and backlit by a bright white light. The drop is unreal. Neon images of horrific yet beautiful androids thrash and turn in time, random gears and springs and limbs falling off from time to time and flying around the revealed room they reside in; some kind of pitch black warehouse penetrated by rays of white light coming in from what I get are bullet holes in every wall. The light from outside strobes and the neon from the androids cast an eerie glow on the smoke accumulating in the room. It seems scary, but it really wasn't. The girl screeching in the song was represented by a girl resembling Kass moving violently like the androids, eyes and mouth wide open, shown only when a specific blue light flashed from below her to illuminate her entire body for just the duration of the screeches. An intense, vague, positive energy was felt throughout all of this. As the song cycled, The scenes all mingled together, the tadpoles now bouncing around in the room with the temporarily deactivated androids. The mannequin melted and the words appeared this time as the bullet holes in one wall. The androids began thrashing around again the instant the drop hit, more parts flying around, some knocking the tadpoles and sending them flying. As the song ended, the slowing voice was represented as a spinning jenny being hit on the wheel by the tadpoles with each syllable until it fell over. The groan at the end was just a completely black void that appeared abruptly as the sound.

 

Every aspect of her visualization had some futuristic, robotic aspect to it. Very cyberpunk. Which I find a bit strange since I'm more into steampunk than cyber.

 

Kass started this whole thing by talking to me about the idea, then after I agreed to try it, telling me to go into one of my dream states. I don't really know what happened between then and now outside of what I saw as the song played. Like with the sleep paralysis event, it took me a bit to regain the ability to move my body. I don't know if I want to try that again anytime soon, but it was one of the most vivid things I'd ever witnessed.

 

Another thing to note is that when I was coming out of it, it's entirely possible I saw he sitting over me for a brief second. I'm not sure.

My ramblings and that

 

Host: Rob

Tulpa: Kaylee

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I just had an experience. I feel Kass is a lot deeper than Espeon or I thought. She told me she wanted me to feel what she does when I play Hey Sexy Lady (Skrillex Remix) for her. I don't really know what to call what she did, but it was phenomenal. I already have a pretty fun visualization going on when I listen to a song, but this was way different. I encourage anyone with a tulpa who could possibly do something like this, do it.

 

It was kind of like a possession, only she took over part of my brain, kinda like when she or Espeon want's me to write for them. The best way I can describe it is she hijacked my emotions while the song played and substituted them with her own.

 

Before I go any further, I'll describe my usual visualization during the song for comparative purposes.

 

When the song starts off, I relax into the beat and can imagine myself playing the song much like how Kass does it with her instrument. As it picks up, I see the girl singing as a kind of 3D model head singing and a scene of a car from the bumper perspective speeding through a city at night with fast motion effects. At the bass drop, it's similar to the beginning beat and I can see a clash of random images that seem to fit the mood. As the song repeats its cycle, the visualization also starts over with a few minor changes. The song ends with the 3D model slowly shutting down and the ending groan is made by a Ron Jeremy-esque man sitting up in a bed in an apartment in the city like he just woke up from some nightmare.

 

That'd be my internal music video for this song.

 

Now it's her turn.

 

The opening is a menagerie of neon reds and blues, bouncing in beat with the song. The voice is now synced by neon tadpole-like things that hop around this black void between the other lights, making more neon ripples wherever they bounce off this invisible surface. As the vocals start in their proper order, the lights fluctuate with each syllable. When the computerized voice speaks, the male singing voice is represented as a molten and melting sketching mannequin, and the computer's words are materialized over it and backlit by a bright white light. The drop is unreal. Neon images of horrific yet beautiful androids thrash and turn in time, random gears and springs and limbs falling off from time to time and flying around the revealed room they reside in; some kind of pitch black warehouse penetrated by rays of white light coming in from what I get are bullet holes in every wall. The light from outside strobes and the neon from the androids cast an eerie glow on the smoke accumulating in the room. It seems scary, but it really wasn't. The girl screeching in the song was represented by a girl resembling Kass moving violently like the androids, eyes and mouth wide open, shown only when a specific blue light flashed from below her to illuminate her entire body for just the duration of the screeches. An intense, vague, positive energy was felt throughout all of this. As the song cycled, The scenes all mingled together, the tadpoles now bouncing around in the room with the temporarily deactivated androids. The mannequin melted and the words appeared this time as the bullet holes in one wall. The androids began thrashing around again the instant the drop hit, more parts flying around, some knocking the tadpoles and sending them flying. As the song ended, the slowing voice was represented as a spinning jenny being hit on the wheel by the tadpoles with each syllable until it fell over. The groan at the end was just a completely black void that appeared abruptly as the sound.

 

Every aspect of her visualization had some futuristic, robotic aspect to it. Very cyberpunk. Which I find a bit strange since I'm more into steampunk than cyber.

 

Kass started this whole thing by talking to me about the idea, then after I agreed to try it, telling me to go into one of my dream states. I don't really know what happened between then and now outside of what I saw as the song played. Like with the sleep paralysis event, it took me a bit to regain the ability to move my body. I don't know if I want to try that again anytime soon, but it was one of the most vivid things I'd ever witnessed.

 

Another thing to note is that when I was coming out of it, it's entirely possible I saw he sitting over me for a brief second. I'm not sure.

 

Kass is trying to make you into a rape slave.

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I'm not sure what happened. It was just weird.

 

And no, Kass isn't trying to make me her sex slave.

 

Like I said, if anyone else's tulpa can do something like this, just try it. That's the best I can say. It's something that needs to be experienced to be understood. This happened to me so I think it's possible a tulpa can do something like this. If they can possess parts or even an entire body, then why not this?

 

It feels really weird to me to even be posting this stuff, but nobody's complaining over here and for all I know this could be some kind of progress. I did possibly actually see Kass when I woke up from this trance or whatever, but it was only for a split second.

 

Maybe constantly forcing is finally having adverse effects on me. I don't know. I just don't know.

 

It sounds like a warzone outside my house right now. I really hope someone's just doing random fireworks for seemingly no reason.

My ramblings and that

 

Host: Rob

Tulpa: Kaylee

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Breakthrough. I just took maybe an hour or so to work with Kass on her voice. I used Wonderwall to help get her audible and she was able to sing again. This time, though, I intentionally parroted her singing the song over and over in her own voice as mitchdevano suggested in his voice guide. Now instead of just understanding what Kass wants to say when she speaks telepathically, she has her own distinct voice I can hear in my head. I've stopped parroting and the voice still registers when she talks on her own. This is one step closer to audible speaking I think. Espeon is next now that I know this process works for me. I'm still reluctant to parrot, but if it works, it works.

 

Kass is really happy now that she has a distinct voice. It also happens to be the voice of someone I used to love who practically destroyed me for 4 years of my life. She asked if I was ok with her having that voice and potentially bringing up all those bad memories through it. I told her it was fine because now I could attach good memories to the voice. Plus it'll be much easier I think to hear her when she does become audible. That voice is unique to that one person and now Kass. I know I'll never hear the real person's voice ever again, so if I ever do, I'll know it's Kass.

My ramblings and that

 

Host: Rob

Tulpa: Kaylee

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A couple things today.

 

first, kass woke me up this morning. i decided to give pronas' test a shot of having her wake me up. i asked her to wake me up at 7. first i woke up at 6 as if an alarm clock had gone off. it was very abrupt and nothing had actually woken me up like an alarm or something. there's no other reason i would've woken up that early. i fell asleep again after a few minutes since i was so tired from being up late and she woke me up again at 8. again it was abrupt like an alarm, but there was no alarm or anything to wake me up. it was kass both times.

 

i've never really had a wonderland, so after i got up, i decided to try and make one. it took a little time, but i've established a small tropical island with a furnished hut. the tropical island seems to be a popular kind of wonderland from what i've seen. in the hut there's a queen size bed, kitchen, dining area, basically everything you'd need in a house all packed into one room that's inexplicably larger than the hut itself. the hut's small, but the room is big enough to fit all of this comfortably. there's also a jukebox with pretty much every song i've ever heard or at least liked enough to remember. i was able to bring kass there with me and after exploring the hut a bit, we played some music and she danced. i'm not much of a dancer, so i pretty much just watched.

 

espeon seems to be going dormant. my guess is it's because i've been spending so much time with kass and her development. it doesn't feel like he's upset or jealous, just like he's staying out of the way. he's still around, he's just a lot less talkative or active. like he's napping a lot. this was kinda confirmed when i made the wonderland. he came with us, curled up on the bed and hasn't come back. like i feel his presence isn't around me anymore, but in the wonderland. i think it's alright. he's not upset, so i think he's just giving me and kass our time together.

 

kass has changed a bit too. she's not nearly as sex-crazed and is taking on less of a tomboy attitude. she's still a tomboy, but she's not really acting the same as she used to. it's hard to explain really. she's changed physically too. in addition to a new accessory, a seashell bracelet on her left wrist, i noticed she has a deadmau5 tattoo over her heart. not the mouse character, but just red digital lettering saying "deadmau5". i like deadmau5, but i don't really listen much.

 

i'm not entirely sure where i'm going to go given the recent events and findings. my main focus is going to be on kass for now, but it's kind of up in the air whether she'll become audible or visible first. she's been both at different times, so i kinda feel like she's getting close to one of them at least. we're working as hard as we can.

 


 

Espeon

Mood: Distant

Progress: Sentient, not audible, not imposed.

Notes: With the recent creation of the wonderland, Espeon seems to want to stay there for a while out of the way of me and Kass. He asserts that he's not upset about me spending so much time with Kass and I have to believe him. He's not acting differently towards Kass and I'm not picking up and negative emotions at all from him.

 

Kass

Mood: Mellow

Progress: Sentient, distinct voice, singing is becoming more frequent through continued practice, visible briefly under certain circumstances

Notes: Kass gained a bracelet and tattoo. This wasn't an active decision on my part, much like her jeans and flip-flops. Her behavior seems to be normalizing as time goes on. Espeon is doing a good job with her.


being on the island with kass is kinda like being in a bollywood movie. at random times she'll turn on the jukebox and break out into dance. a note about the jukebox, the music fills the area when it plays. it's more like a p.a. than a set of speakers. no matter where i go on the island, if the jukebox is on i can hear it loud and clear.

My ramblings and that

 

Host: Rob

Tulpa: Kaylee

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Computer's messed up so im switching to mobile for now.

 

Kass and i are checking in on espeon every so often. He seems ok just hanging around the island for now. We've decided to name the island Flagstaff. I honestly don't know why that sounds so familiar to me. Open to suggestions.

 

The island isn't very big, but the forest behind the hut seems kinda dense.so exploration may be fun in the future. It doesn't have anything cool really like dungeons or rocketships, but we like it.

My ramblings and that

 

Host: Rob

Tulpa: Kaylee

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Tried another dream-state session with kass. I ended up falling asleep and having a dream about her. I don't remember much of the dream, but i do remember speaking myself, but kass's voice came out of my mouth instead of mine. I don't remember exactly what was said or in what context, but this could be progress.

 

I'm currently working with her more on what we're calling the "oasis method" to help get her audible. It's interesting to note that not only do i hear her singing right now, but the singer himself sounds more distant. I don't know what exactly that means, but i thought i should put it out there.

 


 

Kass pointed out to me that i've never really introduced myself here on the forum.

 

My name is Rob. I'm a writer of everything from haiku to a seven book novel series. Nothing of mine has really been released yet. I have a very active and creative mind which i think has equal parts advantages and disadvantages while making my tulpae. I also think that by saying this a lot of you will think a lot if not all of my work has been fabrication. Thats probably one of the reasons i was reluctant to do this, but kass convinced me. And she's right telling me as long as i believe in them thats what matters because thats the whole point. If i didnt honestly believe everything ive been writing, then there'd be a huge problem here. I do believe it all. I'm not sure how some of it works, but i bet not a single one of you knows everything there is to know about tulpae. I know i don't. I want to thank those who do believe this is all true just as i believe everyone else's progress logs i've seen. I think anyone who would come here and lie about somethin like this is just an overall shitbag who should probably have a lobe cut out or two. Thats all i have to say. Thats who i am. Thats NesterBones. Thanks kass.

My ramblings and that

 

Host: Rob

Tulpa: Kaylee

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