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KM & RD


KruegerMeister

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(edited)

7/24/14: When my cat randomly jumped (not normal), I saw Lanky!RD pointing a knife at her. I said that that wasn't funny. RD said that she'd done that because I'd had creepypastas on my brain at the time (like how she turned into a changeling when I read Deception is Magic). I thought about vocal possession, and RD cited the case of Koomer & Oguigi as a reason not to try that. I brought up the fact that their problem stemmed from an imposition method, and reminded her that when she had mimicked that method, she was using it to "shield" me from the stuff that happened to them. This might have influenced my decision to do nightly hypnosis (which I set up so that it would only work under very-hard-for-a-third-party-to-engineer circumstances). I looked around a dark corner and saw Nina!Dash in my mind's eye. She called me "father" in a distorted voice. After this, she said that it was a reference to the "Distorted Pinkie" story from 4Chan. I thought about Dash's Lanky form, and she briefly distorted her face and said "oogaboogabooga" to imply that she won't turn into anything like Distorted Pinkie. I had an intrusive thought of the Nina chimera looking creepy. RD blamed it on my stitches, meaning the intrusive thoughts stop when I get my stitches taken out.

 

Should I deliberately try to find the image that "inspired" RD's Lanky form? Or would that--

 

[ignore it.]

 

'Kay. Better question: does including Dash's dialogue, and replying to it, make me seem crazy?

Edited by KruegerMeister
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7/25/14: Rainbow Dash and I talked about how she sometimes says stuff in other mindvoices and appears as other characters. I asked if that was a multiple personality thing, and she said (in Tulpish) that she was drawing on the traits of whatever character she appeared as/sounded like (or something like that). From this, I theorized that hypnosis doesn't change the traits you have, it just brings certain traits to the front of your personality. While listening to Creep, several meanings some of the lyrics could have in relation to Rainbow Dash came to mind: "what the hell am I doing here?"="Why was I created/What's the meaning of life?"; "I don't belong here"="here" is a dark, bad void that no sane person would want to be in (its a reference to some other tulpa, but I don't remember who); "He's running out the door"=I'm leaving behind the intrusive thoughts of RD's wingless forms, or God's leaving RD. RD said that she didn't send those thoughts, so it must have been me. I saw Nina!Dash. She turned back into Normal!Dash and said she was just messing with me, jokingly calling me "father". I figured out her idea: since her wingless forms were still occasionally appearing, she wanted to turn them into something funny, like how I used to get over intrusive scary images by "rewriting" them to be funny. While typing that sentence, I told each of those forms to please go away. In Shou Tucker's voice, RD asked why I didn't just do that from the start.

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7/26/14: I'm planning a scavenger hunt to market my stories. I'm thinking of using a line from Fullmetal Alchemist as a clue. Dash said that I should "lay off" FMA for a while (to ignore the Chimera intrusive thoughts). My friend asked me if I knew of any shows for us to watch together. I asked Dash if I should recommend MLP:FiM, and she said "go for it". I said that there's a chance of one thing leading to another, and my friend finding out about her. She countered by saying that my friend's into New Age stuff. I reminded her that she said she hated New Agers. She said that she only hates the way they see Tulpas as metaphysical. I pondered the fact that I'm both a Brony and a Furry; Rainbow Dash said that I'm more Brony than Furry (because I have a pony tulpa as opposed to a generic "talking, bipedal animal" tulpa). We sang a duet of part of "Tubby Wubby Pony Waifu" (Dash spoke her parts, which were accompanied by images of her hovering by some clouds).

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7/27/14: On the 25th, Rainbow Dash and I had done Domination/Submission stuff. We'd also talked about something, but I'd forgotten to log it. This lead to a dream in which my mom was being demanding/bossy (like a non-sexual Domination/Submission thing that went sour). Today, I wondered if there was a connection between the dream and the things I'd done before having it. RD said that it was "just a dream". We didn't hang out much until about 6:00PM. Dash pretended to be mad about this. When I told her I had writer's block, she said that fapping would help. I fapped, then Googled Tarot Cards, and got the idea to watch episodes of Yugioh! GX (which features a villain who uses Tarot cards and is pretty similar to the villain in my stories). The very first scene of the episode I decided to watch inspired imagery for one of my stories. I thought that, if I assumed RD was right, I'd mixing up correlation and causation. I thought this in her mindvoice, and she told me not to do that. I told her that I'd be excited when my stitches came out, and she sent me an image of Lanky!RD in my kitchen. It was tied up by the stitches, but broke free through brute force. I imagined RD's wingless selves being shot (meaning that when the stitches come out, my intrusive thoughts of those forms will be no more). Dash reminded me that the only intrusive thought I'd been having for several days was Nina!RD.

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7/28/14: RD was skeptical when I suggested the alias "Rayne Thorne". She said that "Rayne 'Dash' Thorne" might be a good fake name to dedicate my book to. When I asked her for advice relating to my custom Tarot cards, she looked grumpy. I guessed that she was mad about the Tarot reading I'd gotten. I reminded her that I don't care if her origins are psychological or metaphysical, and she rebutted with "Well you're the one thinking [that I'm mad about the reading]!" in Leigh Whannel's (actor/writer in SAW) voice. Since my stitches were out, I figured that it would be an okay time for Rainbow Dash to hypnotize me into being my Ponysona (I make fists to simulate hooves, and the pain from the stitches being tensed would interfere with that). When I went into the trance, she said "Welcome back."

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(edited)

7/29/14: While walking downstairs, I banged my side on the railing. Rainbow Dash massaged it, which helped me ignore the pain. Since I was next to the railing, she had to stick her hoof through two of the balusters. She didn't care that her hoof had passed through them. As a random conversation topic, I asked what it would imply if the spot I banged were the exact spot where Jesus was stabbed. She said that it was just a coincidence. We agreed that I was a little bit of an "egotistical douchebag" (my words) for thinking that anything would be implied.

While humming Within Temptation's song "A Dangerous Mind", I saw an image of RD freezing. She flew at me and punched me in response to this, with a bit of a smile (I could faintly sense anger). She laughed when I correctly guessed that she sent me the image. I said that she has a weird sense of humor, which she said I gave her. I got the idea to make a tulpa-related Tarot card. I thought about incorporating something related to Rainbow Dash in the card 's illustration. When I thought about incorporating another Rainbow Dash-related thing, she said that that was "too much" of...something. When I was about to type "too much of a tribute" (which is what I thought she'd said), she said that she hadn't said that. She suggested that the card could represent inner guidance/conscience. When I said that I'd already came up with that idea, she defensively said (in Tulpish) that it was easier for tulpas to talk about what the host is talking about than to come up with a different topic. I clarified that my statement wasn't an attack on her person.

 

I have a habit of getting defensive when one of my friends tries to correct me. When I thought that maybe the above exchange was RD trying to help me not get defensive (by putting me in the role of my friend), she stuck her tongue out like an anime character playing a practical joke. When I looked at pony pics on Google Images, RD advised me not to click a sort-of-scary-looking thumbnail before bed. I didn't heed her advice, but looked at the image and told it to please go away. When I typed "please go away" in my PR log, Dash said "Works every time." (Semi-lewd)

She sent me a male nudie I'd accidentally found online once. I'm pretty sure she was implying that I could always take nude pics of myself and sell them for cash if I didn't have any other options (lolwut?)

.

Edited by KruegerMeister
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(edited)

7/30/14: Dash and I discussed what we'd do if my parents found out about her. When I binged Yugioh to get ideas for my Tarot deck, RD recommended not doing that. She LOL'd when I was momentarily stuck thinking in the voice of Sartorius (voiced by Maddie/Adam Blaustein). Dash briefly turned into The Uncopyrightable, in the same pose as Nina!RD. To prevent a new intrusive thought, I mentally burned The Uncopyrightable with silver fire (silver has antimicrobial properties, on top of fire killing bacteria).

Edited by KruegerMeister
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7/31/14: Rainbow Dash and I didn't hang out much. Well, we did, but I forgot to log it all. When I asked her to help me design a fictional ritual, she suggested that it include bowls and candles. My friends were sleeping nearby, so I told myself to stay quiet and only talk to her through telepathy. She repeated that, and I quietly laughed because she'd parroted me (geddit?)

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