Pleeb

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Well, JGC... If you asked me closer to high school, I graduated in 1987- my answer would mirror Felicity. My experiences in high school were shaped by family of origin issues, depression, frequent relocations, and an urgency to be done with it all minimizing interaction. I remember quite a bit of high school. I imagine if you interviewed people I attended class with, they'd probably tell you pleasant things about me- but they would not give you insight into the fact that I was frequently on the edge of ending my life. One of the things I miss about high school, it was the last place that provided me an opportunity to interact with peers- people my age. High school is a strange social reality that no reflection, and does not prepare people for, the real world, where you meet all sorts of people, ages, level of functioning- and most the time, you will get out into the real world and the people ask you 'what were you learning' because was rarely applicable to social life outside of high school. Balancing a check book, cooking, cleaning, and basics of self care alone would serve people a great deal better- but there is an assumption you're getting that at home. What I learned at home was not to piss of the matriarch because she collected weapons and more than once it was discharged in the house. (Drugs and alcohol were frequently involved.) My high school experience was skewed to say the least. I have heard some people have very nice memories of high school. I have heard some people marry their HS sweet heart and maintained friends over the years. First four years post HS, I heard from no one, and I made no effort to connect.

 

If I could go back to High School, knowing what I know now, I would. Even if we minimized my knowledge to just knowing the importance of high school, and the confidence to speak up, to be active in class, I would do that. I can tell you precisely when I stop caring about math. I asked a question in algebra and the teacher told me, 'stop asking stupid questions and do it the way i tell you to do it.' I never asked another question. I stopped applying myself in math, and it is one thing I would do over. I am okay at math, I could do better, but I still have that taste in my mouth. If I went back, I would focus more on the social aspect and try to make genuine connections with others, even if I thought those connections would end after high school. People coming and going has been a theme through out my life, and would go back and maximize the emotional connection and treasure that moment. There were some good people around me. I would go back and take more social risks even if I failed and got ridiculed because no one is likely to remember me after high school anyway. If they did, I would imagine they would say 'at least he didn't go quietly. he tried. I want to be more courage.' We like stories of courage and people overcoming. High school is the last safe place to learn courage- the further away from high school, the greater the consequences for making social mistakes. We all make them, or will make them- either in our younger years or are later years.

 

There is new perspective I have adopted, though. Do not worry about any of this now. Don't think on where you are now. Don't think of it beyond your present assessment. Assume you assessment is dead on. Assume, thirty years from now- where you end up, you're okay and you can look back and you can reassess and you can say to yourself 'it was alright' or it 'sucked ass' but you know what, I am happy with who I am and where I am and I would not be here if not for there. Don't think of here, think of there. Aim for there. You don't hit the target by looking at your feet. If you're on a motorcycle going in a circle, and you look down or into the turn, you crash your bike every time. You go where eyes go. I have shared this in story, and with a friend here- Holodock for sure: in the past if I had a time machine, I would have gone back and changed everything. I am five years invested into my son, and what, four years invested in Loxy- I would relive my entire life over a million times and again without changing a thing just so I can meet son again, so I can meet Loxy again. So I can be here and meet all of you, YOU JGC, again. That's love. Nothing else is more important than that.

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38 minutes ago, Breloomancer said:

would you rather some genocide, or no genocide?

Well I can't get 100% completion in Undertale without taking all possible endings.


Yo, my name is Sean and I'm the host of 2 tulpas: Sente and Mae. You'll know when they're talking because Sente talks in yellow text and Mae talks in blue text.

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Best thing would be learning to turn the worst things into something good. That's definitely easier said than done. We're still learning every day and mishaps happen to all of us. We're all just humans in the end.


Hello, my name is Kurisutina. Part of the Unicorn Cavalry system

Other's from this system: Matsuri, Udongein, Xarbern

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