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I think that anything more dangerous than molly or ketamine is not worth considering unless you are planning to die within a few years, and all drugs should be thoroughly considered before usage

I have a tulpa named Miela who I love very much.


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Heart palpitations aren't fun, sometimes it lasts a while and it starts to feel like I'm gonna die or something

CM - 30th April 1997 - Host of the system

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11 minutes ago, ClianthaMiura said:

Heart palpitations aren't fun, sometimes it lasts a while and it starts to feel like I'm gonna die or something


When I'm highly stressed, this is one of the seven serious symptoms I get.


I actually learned how to stop my own heart for a couple seconds, skipping a couple beats before it races back to normal because of this. It's like holding your breath, you know how it's supposed to feel and you seek that feeling until it happens then hold it, but similarly to holding your breath, you can't hold it long.


The feeling is like all the blood just falls, like it drains from your face and head. It's very peaceful but also scary.


The palpation is awful though, like there's something in your throat that you can't swallow or expell. It an odd kind of 'I can't catch my breath" sort of feeling.


I check my pulse and instead of thump-thump-thump-thump, it's chchung-thupbugcahug-pause sinking feeling-cagkakachug-BUP-BUP-BUP-BUP


If I relax, it goes back to normal. During a panic attack, I could literally die I bet.


It brings a smile to my face, because the frailty of this strong body is ironically oxymoronic.


I went to the doctor both periods of my life that it happened and there's really nothing they can do, they just said, unless it becomes more frequent, it's not worth the side effects of the medication or the surgery.

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@ the foot thing, I had ingrown toenails when I was younger (less gross than it sounds, just means a toenail grows too far to the side and starts poking your toe... and it hurts and needs to be cut out), and one very incompetent pediatrician. Something like 12 shots between my two feet to try and numb me (where I learned I'm highly resistant to numbing) before he just stuck scissors up my toe nails to cut them, which still hurt a lot but only about as much as all the shots.


Note to literally everyone, see a podiatrist for foot problems, not a pediatrician, even if you're not 18 yet. They're a lot better at their jobs.

Hi! I'm Lumi, host of Reisen, Tewi, Flandre and Lucilyn.

Everyone deserves to love and be loved. It's human nature.

My tulpas and I have a Q&A thread, which was the first (and largest) of its kind. Feel free to ask us stuff.

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