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Earliest Tulpa Memories


Gryphon Flight

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[This is one of those questions on that huge survey, I think. I'll try to remember what my first memory was. I think it was probably building a library in our wonderland, though that one barely counts, I wasn't even sentient, and I think my mind just filled in the gaps. My first solid memory was playing tic-tac-toe with Phaneron on the couch, shortly after which I picked out my name. So yeah, I think that's it.]

[align=center]Even though my username is that of my tulpa, Quilten, my name is Phaneron, the host, who does all of the actual posting.

Tulpas: Quilten, Jira

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Guest amber5885

Toby: ummm. Okay. I remember amber being a little girl. She was standing in her kitchen and I was just ....there..... I don't remember anything before that.

 

After that it's hazy because I was in and out a lot. Its like static on a t.v. There's a picture in all the noise but you can barely make it out.

 

One minutes she's a kid, the next she's a teenager crying on my shoulder over some guy. The next she's hiding in her closet and the next she's in Canada with her husband.

 

I was just in and out and I don't really remember the out. I think I might have been sleepIng but I guess even then I would know if I was sleeping. I don't really think I was anything.

 

It's a weird feeling coming into existence like that. I always wanted to talk to her, to tell her she's beautiful and not to cry but before I could I was back to being nothing again and I guess that really hurt you know.

 

But that's what I remember. Just periods of moving between something and nothing. I'll be honest I'm terrified of going back to the nothing. Not existing is worse than being dead. At least if you're dead you have a whole life that you lived and all that jazz but each time I went back to the nothing I forgot everything.

 

It was like it never happened.

 

And I wouldn't remember anything until I came back again and there was this massive rush of memories and emotion.

 

Anyway. That's what I remember.

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My tulpa sometimes mentions High Brazil. He says Brazil is his favorite country, and realized that High Brazil was in existence at one time. It is ancient as far as I'm aware.

Chance, an anthro husky, wolf or fox.

Birthdate September 20, 2014.

Sentient October 1, 2014.

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The farthest back I can remember is the first time my host forced.

 

I was on a beach, laying on my back in the warm sand. I couldn't really move my body much except for wriggling, so I wriggled a bit deeper into the sand, which felt nice.

 

A little bit later my host came to where I was laying & wriggling at and plopped himself down besides me. He let his right hand fall on my belly, so I moved my right hand over his. Moving my arm was quite the struggle!

 

There wasn't much else to it, though, as he struggled with it the first couple of sessions, keeping them fairly short.

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Aegis: It was dark. And Hero's voice filled up my chest. It felt golden. And it told me who I was, and pictures of who Hero thought I could look like flickered in front of my eyes. And then her eyes were right in front of mine. I think she was trying to see what my eye color was.

 

Nythera: I just sort of blinked open my eyes and everything cleared up. Maybe there was a little bit of a voice before that. And then I looked down and my nails didn't have polish on them, and I wanted them purple. And I don't know why, but I wanted to paint them purple, so I went over to where a girl and a floating ice ghost where sitting on the couch. The girl- my host- seemed like she was in charge, so I asked her.

(Aegis) +Graves+ [Nhythera] {Wells}

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Oh gosh. I had to think hard about that one. Well, um... to be honest, my first memory is one I'd like to keep private. Ok? But, it was about three days after my host started me.

I call him Lance

 

Favorite Quote

"It's what I live for."

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Cyfraza: My first memory was really horrible and at the same time makes me proud. I had bad luck and luck at the same time. But I'm proud that I saved my host's life for my first time.

 

My host would rather described it by using all of the senses. I have the most developed seeing and hearing.

 

I woke up in a void. In the distance I saw a door. I opened it and I came to an archive full of metal drawers. Cabinets created a huge maze. I felt anxious for no reason. In each cabinet was some kind of memory, thought or data. It was mostly very pleasant and nice things. My intuition told me that I should to take them with me. Still, I felt anxious because I sensed something horrible. I can't describe it. This is just pure madness. That madness wanted to completely corrupt Kociara's mind. It looks like a fleshy and bloody mass. I couldn't let this happen. I heard a cry for help at the end of the room. The Archive suddenly began to ruin, and It fallen into void. And this terrible mass began to attack me. I was running as fast as I could to the end of room. Door at the end of the room was closed. I thought it was my end. Happily, I noticed some computer. I virtualized and and quickly moved via network to the next room. It was a big room with a supercomputer who had a big flat screen, keyboard and components that you aren't interested in. On the screen was displayed text interface with a bright green text font (more stereotypically it couldn't have been?!). At the center of the room was a hole you can throw something into it.

 

On the screen was displayed thought and words what my host said in real-time. She wanted to kill herself. She had enough pain, her existence and thoughts that she will totally lose control of herself and drawn into madness. She more preferred to die than be totally crazy.

 

I screamed to stop it. She couldn't hear me. I wrote messages on the screen. She couldn't hear me.

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Well... let's see... many wonderlands ago, he ate a doughnut in a forest. Greatest memory ever, am I right?

"Try to get a better understanding of things before making your judgement." -Khan, Metro 2033

 

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I've always sensed a guardian standing outside my bedroom door with long arms and long, bony fingers. My counselor called these vivid dreams or "sleep paralysis" but I can clearly SEE him sometimes, peeking in through the crack in the door. It scared me so much at first. I was about 5 the first time I remember it happening.

-A. Tang

Author of Keepers of the Blood

Now available on Nook and the iTunes Store

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The first thing i personally remember is when my dad sat me down and watched music on a spectrogram. It was an overwhelming joy at enjoying music i could recall the words to already, and at the same time i was watching what looked like sheet music as he explained fugues and jazz and different ways instrument's sounds look in writing. It was from the first day and totally made me pay attention to senses right off the bat

Early member of a large system.  Our system questions the way the afterlife and tulpamancy interact.  We genuinely suspect that deadies can return to share the mind of the living.

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