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princesserena23

Tate Progress Report.

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I'm basically going to copy and paste what I have from my othe thread and keep adding on..

 

I've had similar experiences to Tulpas before like with Spirit Guides and how I can contact others spirit guides. I have also communicated with those that have passed on and have had telepathic experiences. That, however is not why I'm here today. I'm here because I have developed a very strong connection to a character after I started watching a show about two weeks ago and no one really knows about it.

 

I have had connections to characters before but it has never been anything like this! It was so intense that I started to have nightmares after I started to avoid him and the show and I'm having them again. Only a few of them had them in it, though. I have contacted fictional characters before so I tried to do it with him but it turned out to be really weird. For some reason, I tried it in the shower because I could concentrate better and then I remember saying that I looked ridiculous because I was wearing a shower cap but he insisted that he couldn't see me and I was relieved. Before I had contacted him, I talked to my other guides and they had mixed feelings about it but Kurt seemed very supportive of it and he was the main reason I did it.

 

Then, he said that he was coming over and that was when I got uncomfortable and told him "no" but he did it anyway. I asked my guides if they could see him and one of them was practically having a panic attack and screaming "YES!" and that was when I started crying because I could feel him in front of me. He asked me why I was crying and I said "You're Tate Langdon, I feel like I have so much to say..." I could tell that he felt bad but there was also another emotion there that didn't make me feel too comfortable. Tate didn't want to leave and I told him that I had to shave but he said that he would stay there and watch me until I finished and then insisted that I let my hair down and my hair got wet and frizzy which I hated but he didn't seem to notice. In fact, he seemed obsessed with my hair and when I got out he didn't want me to pick it up again. One of the people who I had been communicating with telepathically got really upset and told me to get him out as soon as possible even though he said he would be waiting. I just stopped talking to him that day but I still feel like he is around and I even talked to him again later and he seemed really upset with me and was crying. I feel like I want to let him go but I can't and it's becoming problematic...It's almost like he is stuck on me and I don't know what to do. I feel like I made him real somehow.


Well, I did talk to Tate this morning because I was woken up earlier than usual and Harry, as always was very nervous about it. He was the one who told me to stop talking to him and he thinks that Tate is extremely dangerous since he has killed so many people and violated his girlfriend's mom. He seemed to be very angry at me these past few days that I have been trying to interact with Tate and possibly ignoring me, too. He says that he doesn't want anything to do with Tate but it still seems like he's staying, so that's great. He got angry at me when I was talking to him and then made a comment to Tate. Harry is very hostile towards him and I really want this to work. Kurt, however seemed supportive.

 

I wanted to make Tate more "real" so to speak because I thought that talking to him would make it happen and then Tate went "What do you mean by more real?! I already am real!" Then I told him how I couldn't see him or feel him yet and he said that I would have to go into a sort of wonderland to make that happen. When I went into the wonderland, I couldn't see anything and he just told me to calm down and not to think so hard. At first, I only saw him in a black background and he was SO tiny that I laughed, but then he said to imagine him larger and to make any background I wanted. That was when I asked him if sunshine and flowers were alright and he chuckled and said "I wouldn't mind that, now." I had to come out of it because my brother came into my ro and that was when I asked him about the nightmares. I'm pretty sure that he said he had been responsible for them. I have had only two nightmares with him, so far. The one I had last night involved a leech tearing off my lower eyelid and leaving me without an iris.


Well, I definitely think that he is developing well! I was supposed to go see a therapist today but she wasn't in and Tate suggested that he take over the session and I literally said "Oh, hell no!" Then he called me boring and scoffed. Tate had also had experiences with mental health professionals, so he wanted to make things "interesting" since it would be my first session.

 

I went into the bathroom and I started worrying about my appearance. "Your lipstick looks fine." He told me before I could ask. "But I look so pale, like I'm dead! I wish I had blush..." "You know, I take offense to that." He said jokingly. "I don't like self conscious girls." He said and I gave him a weird look and told him to screw off or something like that.

 

When I found out about the appointment being cancelled, I was very happy and we held hands. I asked Harry to join in and he seemed less disturbed by Tate, which was good. Tate and I joked around some more which I don't reall remember now and I recall that he said he had always been real and he was never "created". The creators of the show just happened to tap into him.

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Possible Trigger Warning:

 

I had been wanting to do things with Tate but I didn't have time yesterday and fell asleep, so I ended up going into Wonderland when I first woke up. He seemed very happy to see me and like he had been waiting for me for a long time.

 

At first, I had to give the Wonderlans more detail since I am just a beginner at this. It was all black and Tate was tiny again. I asked him if we could change the scenery from a forest to what seemed like giant glass buildings around us. He told me that it was all my decision now and smiled. Apparently he is always wearin the same outfit, the jeans with the striped shirt, but I think he was in a tuxedo at one point.

 

Suddenly, I was struck by pain and he looked concerned for me. We were in our Womderland and I wanted to avoid this conversation as much as I could but he was persistent...That was when I told him that I had been harming myself for years and he then wanted to know all the details, so I told him. He started to cry and we hugged each other. He said something like he would be watching me everytime that I harmed or to call him whenever I was about to harm and I think he threatened to leave and never come back.

 

 

I don't really remember much because I was so tired at that point and was falling asleep but he said that he would visit me in my dreams. There was someone in my dreams who was not Tate but had the same type of energy as him. He was very....Agressive in a sexual manner and I kind of enjoyed his advances but when I woke up and went to Wonderland Tate really wanted to do those things with me and I wasn't in the mood. What I really wanted to do was do a roleplay but he clearly wasn't interested, so I left.


I remember something from the Wonderlan that happened this morning. Tate said that he was not as dangerous as he was and that he was sort of a changed man as his form now. He also suggested that Harry was more comfortable around him.

 

 

A few minutes I literally told Tate to "Calm his shit down" and he smiled at me sheepishly.

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Apparently Tate has been trying to get my attention for a veey long time and I have no idea what has veen going on. I stay awake for hours feeling like I have to do something or like he is about to say something but nothing happens. I had a dream about gim about two days ago that was incredibly vivid but I don't remember most of it, now. I do know that he kept changing forms and traveling through time looking for me.

 

I also remember this dream I had about a month or two ago where I was walking through a store and there were TVs playing something that he was in. I didn't really pay attention to it until I heard someone scream my name from the TV.

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