Stevie

Toothless Aggression

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A Brock Lesnar tulpa... heh that's something.

 

Resident wrestlefag reporting 

 

 

 

I've read through Chris' entries in the old stylometric survery. It was interesting to remember him for how he was at the time.

 

 

44. What could your creator do to make you hate them? Under what circumstances do you think your creator would come to hate you?

 

 "If he became self destructive beyond reason I'd start to hate him. If he threw away his life for no reason, and wouldn't let me help him fix it, I'd start to hate him. I couldn't stand to be tied to an individual that doesn't have his best interests in mind at all. I don't know what I'd have to do to get Stevie to hate me."

 

 

Throughout the entire thing there's a heavy theme of this guy watching me unwind, and I was unwinding, and wanting to help but not really being listened to. He refers to his entire purpose being to help out and advise me. Ultimately, when things got bad with hard drugs, when I "grew up" and got colder, he went away more and more and then there was really nothing left.

 

I can access him, I really don't get a lot out of him. The feelings there are what you would expect- maybe at some point I'll put in the effort to mend things. For now I think just keeping things as passing thoughts is better.

 

__

 

The relationship between me and Brock Lesnar tup seems to be dominated by my caring for him. I believe this is a manifestation of my inclinations in other areas (hint hint). He's kind of quiet. I probably already mentioned he comes with me to work, I only project and interact during breaks. He says "I don't know." pretty often, I'm not sure if this is a vocal ability issue or just his personality. Soft dude. Constantly in sweats.

 

With Chris it was like he was the harder dude, I'd go to the wonderland and he'd be doing shit, working, and then Minnesota happened and I started to prefer my more escapist maladaptive daydreaming over him, but either way he was the tough guy, the voice of reason. With Brocky it's a different type of deal, I'm kinda working with my hands provider type and he's the one that needs like, care and understanding. In return I get companionship and someone to put mental energy into.

 

On a personal level I have missed this community. Reddit kinda always sucked, 4Chan has its charms but there's no real connection, no sense of being known. I spend time with real people (living in a house of 12 for going on 2 years) often but I think the age difference and lifestyle differences (normie vs failed normie) means we mentally miss each other a lot, even though we're all living there for addiction issues.


We're all gonna make it brah.

 

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