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Solve the above with troll science


Quetzal the furdragon

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Megaphone because i would scream at wall and break it.

 

Someone want to kill you but your only chance to survive is jump from 424km cliff. How you survive?

 

... ahdun think you quite understand the game here. xD

 

 

Greets,

AG

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It's quite simple you see, the earth is about 6.9 thousand km in radius, so 13.8k km in diameter. All I do is jump into the hole, and come out on the other side somewhere in the sea SouthWest of Austrailia. I simply hitch a ride to Austrailia and meet my extended family there to help get me home.

 

You wanna get a picture with Mickey Mouse at Disneyworld, but there's a 5 hour line to meet him. You look at your watch, the park closes in 4 hours. Searching your pockets you find a baguette, A manga of Attack On Titan, $24.75 (in a 20, four ones, and three quarters), a photo of Jean-Luc, and a Boba Fett souvenir cup. How do you get to Mickey without cutting and before the park closes?

"Try to get a better understanding of things before making your judgement." -Khan, Metro 2033

 

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Bribe the person behind you to hold your place for the four one dollar coins. Go to some guy and give him the 20 dollar bill, saying you want him to run away when a crowd comes. Yell out "this guy is giving out free money!" Watch as 80% of the line runs towards the man and casually walk into only a 30 minute wait. Read manga while you wait.

 

With only a few silver coins, a plastic container, a bottle of water, a gooey substance, and a phone, escape out of a burning building alive.

 

I'm not going to listen to you guys since you are all probably just talking to yourself and don't really have a tulpa like me.

 

 

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First, I cover myself in the gooey substance. Makes me more resistant to heat. Next, I pour the water on the fire and run down the stairs. When I get out, I go to a payphone and call 911 on it, getting the fire department over there.

 

With a fire truck, a cop car, an ambulance, and a keg of beer, find out how to fly.

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Sell it all for an airplane. Refill the keg of beer and get drunk!

 

With nothing but a 20$ bill, find a way to breathe underwater.

 

I'm not going to listen to you guys since you are all probably just talking to yourself and don't really have a tulpa like me.

 

 

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I could buy a snorkel, but that's no fun.

 

I use the twenty dollar bill, fold it into an origami animal, and sell it for $30. Repeat as needed until I have amassed several hundred thousand dollars. (I switched to folding $100 bills at a certain point.) I commission a Japanese engineering company to build me an expert suit containing oxygen tanks. I use the suit to study marine life and gain an understanding of gills as well as capture a few live fish for study. With bio and genetic companies, I help find a way to make wearable gills to breathe underwater.

 

Figure out how to destroy the sun with a ceiling fan, a solar panel, a cookie, and a life sized plush Elmo.

"Try to get a better understanding of things before making your judgement." -Khan, Metro 2033

 

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I use the solar panel to power the ceiling fan. I do this on a really hot day. I ask someone who's really good at throwing (probably a baseball pitcher) to throw the elmo plushie as high as he can towards the sun for the cookie. The ceiling fan then blows wind so fast from the high amount of energy produced by the solar panel that it starts carrying the plushie towards the sun. Also, because the fan cools the plushie and the space around it, it isn't instantly vaporized when it gets near the sun. It eventually does get vaporized when it makes contact with it, but by then it would have been so cold from the fan that it makes that one spot on the sun 0 degrees, which creates a huge temperature imbalance on the surface of the sun, spreading to the other regions of the sun and speeding its aging process by skipping the red giant step and turning into a dwarf star with no energy. Have fun in an eternal ice age, earth!

 

Successfuly dig into the center of the earth with a butter knife, a pole, six sticks, a phone with no internet, and kool-aid.

 

I'm not going to listen to you guys since you are all probably just talking to yourself and don't really have a tulpa like me.

 

 

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I immediately started pointing out all the flaws in that before I remembered what thread this was XD

 

Successfuly dig into the center of the earth with a butter knife, a pole, six sticks, a phone with no internet, and kool-aid.

Stats is back: https://stats.jean-luc.org/
I don't visit as often as I used to. If you want me to see something, make sure to quote a post of mine or ping me @jean-luc

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I use the phone to call a Hollywood producer and sell them a script for a really bad B movie all about drilling to the centre of the earth called The Core. Hollywood builds me a giant drill ship. I use the kool-aid to bribe the casting agent to sneak me on board as a cast member. I use the butter knife as a makeshift utility knife to fix things when they inevitably go wrong. After the bombs go off I fashion the six sticks into a makeshift raft and use the pole as a paddle to make my way back to the surface.

 

Contact alien life with a paperclip, a paper towel tube, and an elastic band.

Host comments in italics. Tulpa's log. Tulpa's guide.

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Oh, that's simple. First, stick the paperclip directly through your skull and into your brain so that you can hear the aliens. Bend it slightly and then rotate until the aliens you want to contact are the loudest, that's your direction. Take the paperclip out and fasion it onto one end of the tube to hold the elastic band, write your message on the band the then stretch it between your fingers and the paperclip (that is attached to the tube) such that it will fly through the tube. Like the barrel of a gun, the tube will make the band go in a straight line and go farther, so simply point it at the aliens and fire.

 

Solve a rubik's cube without touching it, using whatever you have around you.

Stats is back: https://stats.jean-luc.org/
I don't visit as often as I used to. If you want me to see something, make sure to quote a post of mine or ping me @jean-luc

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