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The Kaptain's Blog Thing About Creating His First Head Friend


Kaptain_Khaz

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Wow, so I've finally started down this road. I've been on and off about creating another living being in my own head, and I've had a definite amount of doubt about all of this, but I finally gave in and decided it was worth it to try.

I've never done anything close to a blog before, but I've never taken something this seriously before either. I feel like having this space to talk and remind myself of how far I've come should help me stay on track. So here's all about that.

 

Update 1:

So yeah, today's the day I started forcing personality on my yet-to-have-a-name tulpa. She looks something like this. OH jeez it's Fluttershy, except all the two have in common is how they look, but, I digress.

 

So I started off by turning on some white noise and letting my mind get into a more focused place. Once I felt I was ready, I pulled up my little document with all the important info about her on it, moved down to the personality page, and started forcing. I imagined her sitting in a chair in front of me. Then, I pulled out a ball of light that represented a certain characteristic of her personality, explained said characteristic in greater detail, then inserted it into her head. For example, I talked about her positive nature, pulled out a bright pink orb, talked a bit about what positivity was, and what it described about her as a person, then inserted it into her head. Nothing in particular happened with her (not that I expected anything on the first day of forcing). There was some smiling and other facial movements, but I'm hesitant to believe those were her this early in development. Felt some minor headaches forming near the end, but I've read that that's normal.

 

There was one thing in particular that hit me hard, though. Up until now, I'd had serious doubts about how real tulpae were, but today, as I was talking in my head, explaining parts of a personality, I felt like I was genuinely speaking to someone besides just myself. It felt really real. I guess that all it took to convince me was to start, hm?

 

Questions if you feel like answering them:

1. In the underlined section, I talked about some changes in my tulpa's facial expression as I was forcing. Is it possible that she was making these herself, or was it just me?

Boop Boop Boop

Progress on my first tulpa can be found here. You know. If you wanna check that out.

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Hey dude, welcome to the forum.

 

As far as your question about her facial expressions go, I wouldn't sweat figuring out whether it was you or her too hard. Reason being that it's kind of impossible to do this early in the game, and getting hung up on the "was that the tup or me?" question is just gonna breed unnecessary doubt and second guessing.

 

Just take it at face value for now brah, it's pretty cash that you've gotten any kind of feedback on day one.

We're all gonna make it brah.

 

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Wow, quick reply. Thanks for that. And for the advice. And for the warm welcome, too. Glad to be here!

Boop Boop Boop

Progress on my first tulpa can be found here. You know. If you wanna check that out.

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Update 2:

Holy frioli, I just spent three hours and ten minutes tulpaforcing. Writing seems to be a pretty fantastic way for me to tulpaforce, I guess.

 

Started the day off late as hell because I couldn't sleep last night, so I went out to get some lunch and spent the majority of the ride talking to my tulpa out loud. It was interesting, how easily I transitioned into talking in my mindvoice to talking in my real voice when I was in my car. I guess I'm just more comfortable talking to myself when nobody else is around, surprise surprise.

 

So little else happened until three hours-ish ago, when I decided I ought to do some active forcing. Before today, I had some serious problems staying focused when I'd actively force, or even when I'd work on a wonderland, or visualize my tulpa. I'd read a few times that writing is also a good way to do active forcing, so I tried that and ended up doing it for three hours and 7000 words. Didn't even feel like three hours, really. It worked wonders, I spent the whole time focused solely on forcing. I think I'm going to do this from now on. Probably not for three hours a day, but you know.

 

gl4rrXJ.png

Dang son, check them word counts. Shit's cash.

Boop Boop Boop

Progress on my first tulpa can be found here. You know. If you wanna check that out.

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Update 3:

So uh, I didn't say anything yesterday, but I can say that I felt my dear friend tulpa for the first time late last night. I was forcing because I couldn't sleep, and ended up feeling some serious head pressure. I felt her, and I called out and asked her if she was there. I felt a pressure on my left temple, which I'd told her meant "Yes".

So I ask her to surprise me, and then I felt a violent rush of emotions, and none of them felt like they were from me. I was, needless to say, quite enthralled by the fact that I'd felt these emotions now, so I turned on some isochronic tones (which help people with ADD/ADHD concentrate) and talked to her. We ended up doing some basic vocalization exercises. Heard a slight, "I'm" reverberating with the isochronic tones, which really made the fact that she's here concrete to me.

 

It's weird. I've been alone for the better part of my short life, and now I've got someone here with me. Someone that's here with me from the moment I wake up to the moment I go to sleep. Makes my heart go doki doki a bit.

Boop Boop Boop

Progress on my first tulpa can be found here. You know. If you wanna check that out.

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These progessions are really something. I just started yesterday afternoon after deciding to get serious and create my tulpa. I've been having doubt throughout the day over what I should do, how I should go about explaining some personality traits to her, how I can focus better. After reading your posts, I feel more motivated to keep at it. I'll try your method of imagining my tulpa in a chair and presenting the personalities in the forms of orbs.

 

I do hope you continue on with these updates, they give me hope for progress. :)

 

Also, a quick question, I saw that word document with the 7000 words and was wondering how that came into play with your forcing? Were you just typing words instead of thinking towards your tulpa, or were you typing out personality traits and how they'd affect your tulpa?

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I do hope you continue on with these updates, they give me hope for progress. :)

Aw, thanks man. I look forward to seeing some of your own updates, as well. Keep at it until you get something. It'll come eventually.

 

Also, a quick question, I saw that word document with the 7000 words and was wondering how that came into play with your forcing? Were you just typing words instead of thinking towards your tulpa, or were you typing out personality traits and how they'd affect your tulpa?

 

I actually have a much smaller document with all that important stuff on it (aka personality traits I wanted and her appearance), which I memorized. Makes it easier to write about someone for three hours that way. As for the actual writing itself, I put myself in the mindset that I was forcing, and I sort of puppeted her day out for her, and showed her how how she'd react to certain situations. I didn't go into it with any idea how it would come out, I just wrote as the thoughts came to me.

I made a quick pastebin (link) that shows about half of what I wrote originally. I cut the other half out because of personal reasons. It might help a little more than my terrible explanation did.

Boop Boop Boop

Progress on my first tulpa can be found here. You know. If you wanna check that out.

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Hey there. I've just started out myself, I just wanted to say that you've inspired me to write while I try forcing for the first time tonight. I was worried because I wasn't sure how to go about it, but now I have some good ideas after reading through your pastebin.

 

Good luck with your Tulpa, I look forward to reading your PR as you update.

Star light, star bright.

My progress report.

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