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Blix

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    My brain hurts.

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  1. I've been taking all of your advice to heart, and I'm about 80% sure I got some sort of...feedback from him today! Okay, so, to fill in, I've been narrating whenever I can (and I even bought a little ring that I always wear to remind me to do so), and before I do so (when I've got at least an hour to spare at least) I use the self-hypnosis tricks you guys suggested. And I'm pretty sure it's been paying off! So today, I was looking for a book of mine in my messy-as-hell room, which is halfway packed up because I'm moving into a new apartment soon. And about five minutes into searching, it dawned on me that I must have packed the book up. There are about 10 boxes or so, and I reeaally wasn't looking forward to digging through them one by one until I found the book. I said it as mostly a joke at the time, just kind of like "uuugh" but I spoke out loud and said "Drustan, where's my damn book at?" And then my focus kind of narrowed on one box in particular, kind of like when you'd just hit the target trigger while playing a game or something. It felt strange, kind of like a really weak tug, but I took the boxes on top of that one off, opened it up, searched a bit, and sure enough, there was my book! It might have just been me remembering, I guess, but my memory is famously terrible, so that would surprise me a whole damn lot.
  2. At first I didn't believe Tulpas (Tulpae, Tulpa, Tulpo, I dunno) were actual things people could actually create. To be honest, the first I'd ever even heard the WORD was when I read a creepypasta simply named 'Tulpa'. But a few weeks back, I discovered that...whoa. They're really a thing, and they aren't evil, and they're...actually pretty amazing. I've read up on a lot of your stories and experiences on this board, along with re-reading the guides probably about half a dozen times. I've decided to try and create my own Tulpa. For a few different reasons. One, is, I just...want to see if I can. Simple enough. But if I can, a lifelong friend, who'll never leave me in the dust or judge me /too/ too bad for my questionable tastes in everything sounds like something too wonderful to pass up. Certainly something awesome enough to work for. And another, is, after some research, I found that having a Tulpa can be great for your memory. I've got a pretty terrible short term memory, see, and having a buddy around to help remind me of things would be wonderful. I've actually already started! I'm...about ten hours into his creation. Right now, his name is Drustan (I say right now, because I've told him while narrating that he can feel free to change it if he wants to). I'm done with his personality...and I'm leaving the visualization a bit open for him (I have a basic rough draft for him to play off of if he wants) focusing a bit more on narration; trying to make him feel as if he's actually...well, /there/. Because at the moment, I'm still so early on that when I narrate, I kind of feel like I'm just talking to myself out loud. But it's getting better I've noticed--if I stumble on a word while reading a book out loud, instead of just jumping I actually feel a little embarrassed, because he's supposed to be listening to me. I'm wondering though, about how long does it take for you to really feel your Tulpa's presence? I know it'll be totally different for everyone, just like it's totally different for everyone when it comes to when they start becoming vocal. Also, any tips on how to make a Tulpa's presence/soul stronger? I'd be really grateful to hear back from you! And I'll be posting every once in a while when something new pops up with us! --Blix~
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