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Bobby9macy

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    Lord of the Nothings

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    Not very active on the forum, mainly here currently out of curiosity.
  1. I suppose at least it's more beneficial to the tulpa reputation than more creepypasta, then.
  2. It got Greenlit on steam if you're comfortable checking it out there, I understand your caution. The game looks like it has a bit of an outlandish atmosphere, but builds on the relationship between the main character and their tulpa.
  3. I have been inactive for a long time, both in tulpamancy and on this forum. But that's not to say I don't think about from time to time. I saw this today in a Humble Bundle email and I was wondering if the forums had any information about where it came from, because I scarcely hear the word "tulpa" outside of here, though I haven't seen any posts on it. So I'm making this thread. What's the deal? Where did this come from? What's this gonna do for people being introduced to the tulpa concept? I haven't played it yet, I'm just wondering what Tulpa.info forums has to say about this. http://tulpagame.com/index.php
  4. oh, sorry, I said a doctor never told me I had ADHD. I wanted to clear that up so you didn't think my focusing problems I mentioned meant I did, but thanks. I might be trying to do things a bit too quickly, actually a friend just pointed out that I say things off topic a lot, and I started noticing I do move on from things pretty quickly. My tulpa and I have been trying to work on imposition mainly, and maybe it's just too early for that and I need to go back and help her develop some other things first. I'll remember not to assume she's ready to move on from one development stage to the next so quickly, and not try too many things at once while speaking with her, thank you.
  5. I've had a tulpa for nearly half a year now. From what I can see she's been self aware for a long time now, she has a mind voice she talks to me with sometimes but I have to have almost all of my attention on her to keep a conversation going, and on occasion for her to answer even, more concentration than I can give her. Sometimes we complete this parallel processing test perfectly, and sometimes we're way off. I don't think she can do much of anything when I'm already doing things, and it's hard to pay attention to her all the time. I'm I like... using all of the "brain RAM" we have? I've never been told by a doctor that I have ADHD, and I've been told I don't seem like I do have it either, but I've always had trouble focusing in school. Anyone have an idea what's wrong or what I'm doing wrong?
  6. ENTRY 34 It's been a little while since I've posted. I haven't stopped forcing, I just thought some time away might be good. I think I was right. Some things I've learned: - Touching your tulpa even if they're not visible yet can really help get past that wall of unsure, awkwardness (if there is one) and make you feel more like there is someone really there. - Imposition can be incredibly easy for some people and cost them nothing but a matter of days, while taking months or years for other people. - You may feel helpless sometimes, and like you're not making any progress, but that doesn't mean it will get better. You just need to keep trying and learning. - Keep a very very open mind. - Narration can be crucially important. If you find it easy to forget to force, or hard to hold on to the thought of your tulpa, it would be good to make a habbit of narrating to at least keep them open to respond when they want. - Share experiences with your tulpa. Get to know them and make your relationship mean something. - Human forms are easier to impose and visualise than other forms (like ponies) most of the time. - Babysitting other people's tulpas may be found to be extremely difficult to impossible. I think that about wraps that up. Bre is still my primary focus over Sine until she's "fully" developed, but Sine has been around a few times now too. Still only in the wonderland though, I haven't given him a form to be here yet. Bre's been much easier to visualise in human form, so she's been a lot more comfortable in that most of the time, though she still occasionally does turn pony. All these things I've planned for aren't near happening at all yet. But maybe someday when we get there. For now I'm just going to try narration a lot more. I don't know when my next post will be. If I don't post until then, merry christmas.
  7. My tulpa has actually had some times where she's gone down like that too. Maybe they just get comfortable with sleeping or something and get too lazy to do anything else, I don't know really, but I think the way to get her going again might be to get her something or do something for her that'll excite her. Give her a reason to get out of the sleeps. I'd consider myself a very inexperienced tulpamancer though, so I'm sorry if that doesn't work.
  8. Sometimes my tulpa and I try to force her into the game when I play. You can't force them in as a second player, but it's still kinda cool to let them experience the world of the game with you like that. Though we find it a little harder to force ingame than in the real world.
  9. ENTRY 33 I'm probably going to have to go inactive for a while, but I'll keep forcing much as I can.
  10. ENTRY 32 I basically just... let go. I tried to pull off another possession thing, deeper possession than previously, as always. I'd just finished talking to a friend about my worry about wondering if I might actually be skeptical, and that's what's preventing any production through this right now, and I just decided to accept as much as I could. I stopped being afraid of all the "what if I did this?" "What happens if I let that happen?" I let her jump into my body (at least, what presence of her I could feel) and she took her human form. I just laid back and let her take over. I took that massive bulk of everything that was myself, and just started putting it into her. First whatever took up the majority of the mass, this... something, I guess I assumed it was my attention and control of the body, I just put it into her and it just became one with her. Then I started peeling off my real self, or my personality, or whatever it was. It was a part of me, but it wasn't my core. I just peeled off all these things, like... All this energy that went along with things I hated and loved, but not the actual feelings of hate and love. I can still feel my despise of homework on me. As I was doing all this I felt my right foot... this spot on my right foot was just...buzzing. I was a little worried, like it might mean something, like a vein struggling because of something in the way of the blood, but I left it be. Then my whole leg felt buzzy. Not the same kind of buzzy, but it felt... fuzzy... zappy. Like what's described during astral projection. I think I did feel my leg rise into the air, too. Then my hands... There were these... acidic freezing raindrops falling on them. I didn't imagine the feeling of something like this for once, I didn't try to imagine it, I just felt it. I felt it. Dropping on my hands like actual spiky rain drops inserting into my skin. It didn't stray far from the back of my hands, it just started like rain does, slowly, and stopped all the same. Not much happened as I kept peeling myself apart, it getting harder and harder to understand what I was supposed to peel off next, and how I was supposed to do so. Then I decided to stop. I raised my head off the back of my chair, with some sort of effort I didn't require before, and started typing this post. I can still feel my cheeks warm, and some sort of... something. I can feel inside me. I feel the strains on my body, and the sort of... feelings like it's just a pleasure for some of my insides to be there, existing and all. I feel refined. I feel exposed, but I feel like I've got a lot less on me. Like I have become my constant repeating words, "nothing really matters, but that's ok with me." I'm still here though. I still felt like I should type this, and keep moving on in my weird old life. I guess some things are just really hard to kill. Anyways, that is how you remove your puppetphobia. I'll be sure to include this stuff if I make a guide later... Of course first, I'm sure it needs some better level of understanding to be properly used in a guide.
  11. ENTRY 31 Well, I just kinda stretched over my chair a little bit and hung my head back in the air, and I guess since my head was tilted a bit, it must have increased the blood flow to my brain a bit or something cause suddenly I was able to jump into my wonderland and just nearly effortlessly stay there and still feel everything around me. I could kinda even feel like I was actually flying or something cool like that when I jumped across the field using my jet wings to get to the house. Maybe it was just not being right-side-up that made me too disoriented to focus on reality or something. As I went on it was harder to pay attention and I guess my real body began to feel felt fidgety. That always happens. Well, I'll have to try that again. Bre's also feeling kinda energy-less again, I tried to put some of my own energy into producing some gems for her, and I guess it worked kinda. Oh, I should talk about gems more. Some notes: o I can't make my own gems without sacrificing my own energy. That's a good thing. Otherwise I don't know how their existence is really valued at all. o The creation table out in the field on my island produces gems slowly throughout the day and spawns them around the wonderland randomly. This may get a little... painfully annoying, since wonderlands can expand infinitely, and I already have concepts of the planet as a whole, and how stars work in the sky. Maybe Sine can take them and place them in easier to find locations sometimes. o It's hard not to make the monsters look like Homestuck imps, so I guess that's the way they're going to end up looking, and I'm ok with that I guess. I mean, can you imagine exploring the world and running into some of those things and have this start playing? I don't particularly listen to chiptunes, or any kind of electronic for that matter, but I love that theme! o Thin liquid can be produced from gems, for drinking. o Thick liquid can be produced from gems for... imposition material. Like, filler or something. I was kinda stupid to pour the thick variation on her head in the wonderland expecting it to do something, but hey, live and learn... It still seemed to have a tiny affect anyways. Maybe she's slowly absorbing it or something. Well, I think that's it for now. Sorry for constant long posts, but that's just the way I post stuff. All or nothing, I guess. None of those "I narrated today :D" crapes. If that works for you though, keep doin' it, I don't mean offence.
  12. ENTRY 30 I put together some new concepts now. Images are liked due to size, and laziness to actually resize the images. The Dominion Eye: http://www.mediafire.com/convkey/1022/f673pim1cpd996afg.jpg Both Bre and I can use it I guess. Energy Gems: http://www.mediafire.com/convkey/9ff3/a4m3yj3w5i6687kfg.jpg They will basically function like coins in a Mario game. She collects them around the land, floating around in assorted colours like in Spyro, with that weird fiery sort of blaze glowing out of it, making shiny dingy noises when touched/obtained. They're mostly in the wonderland, but I think they can occasionally appear in reality too. Possibly in video games as well, but that hasn't been tried yet, and it takes enough trying to get her on screen already. Though that sounds really fun. Once collected, the gems are placed into a sort of... magic... kitchen appliance grindy thing, and turned to liquid... energy emotion stuff. In the future I plan to be able to do more with this, like gem alchemy, to make specific emotion provoking beverages or something. Though that would require attaching emotions to colours and things of the sort, or adding more dimensions to the gems, and is more complicated than it needs to be right now. I could also probably incorporate them into forgery of more powerful gems that interact with chakras or something. This is all new though, some of these ideas might not go through. Another means of collecting gems might be through defeating monsters, which could appear in the wonderland, reality, and video games. Of course they wouldn't be that harmful though, they'd just make it more fun. Some penalty from being attacked by one should probably exist though. There might also be bosses and things of such too. My wonderland is actually a pretty good place for something like this, with an entire planet of floating islands and stuff, and a mysterious black hole acid world under the clouds... Monsters will also probably change form depending on our current struggles or interests. Yeah, that was inspired by Homestuck. Naturally they should look like this, though: http://www.mediafire.com/convkey/9808/r0o8td97big7a0ufg.jpg Little imp buggers that are probably only about a foot and a quarter tall. They'll probably appear in groups, not drop too many gems, and have varying levels of difficulty. Harder ones dropping more gems. Also let's say 25 gems is equal to one good glass of energy, maybe slightly larger than the size in the picture of Bre and the gem machine above. We'll see how much a glass does to her, I wouldn't say a lot, just helps sustain her better. It would take multiple glasses to grow, probably getting harder and harder as she grows, like a blurry level-up system or something. Maybe requiring her to retrieve more gems per glass to produce better juice? That rhymed. So as you can see, I'm making my life into even more of a game than before. Even though the gems aren't for me.
  13. ENTRY 29 Some things I'd like to go over before my cat finds my keyboard again. First off, Bre's official height has been defined as two feet and one inch. Now for some definitions: Tulpoid I know this is supposed to be an actual word but I'm using it to describe non-sentient objects that aren't legitimate pieces of reality, just imposed, or in the wonderland. So if you see the word "tulpoid" in this progress report, and it is not specified otherwise, this is what I mean. If you can come up with a better word, or already know one, feel free to tell me. Tulpa Magic A genre of magic we're using in my head to explain certain things we want to do, like telekinesis on tulpoid objects, without defying the laws of physics too harshly. Dominion Eye A tool falling under magic as an explanation that I'm planning to use basically for tulpa/tulpoid telekinesis. It works similar to (and is inspired by) the Dominion Rod from Zelda TP, but it appears over the forehead, where the third eye is supposedly located, and obviously looks different than a rod. Energy This word will usually refer to Bre's... overall personal energy. I think I've read some places that other tulpas require some similar, obscure sort of energy visualised to exist or grow, too. Bre's is gained and maintained probably primarily from attention, but it comes much stronger from strong emotions. I think one of Glitch's tulpas picked up uranium pieces for her energy. Maybe later I'll put together a similar concept. It could help keep her busy when I don't have the time to pay much attention to her, too. What if... lemme just go Borderlands here for a second... eridium? Thin Possession More both of us have control over the body, but I let Bre do stuff. I can stop her any time I please, and things of such. Thick Possession Closer to switching. Less instantaneous controllability, probably just a stop mechanism instead of a "let me take back control for a second" kinda thing. That sums it up for now I think. Bre's imposition is coming along alright, I can really feel where she is, even if I can't se her yet. I bet if I believe harder or something she'll impose faster. I also want to work on possession more. I don't think we've done much thick possession yet, but we've probably been a little close. The biggest rock in the way is probably trust, which shouldn't actually be too hard. Bre's doin' alright, Sine's kinda in a sorta self-sustaining sleep to help preserve himself more easily for now and things of such. It'll be fun to mess around with all the cool functions that should be available when Sine can be awakened, but Bre is my first priority. We'll keep working, now.
  14. ENTRY 28 Although we have been doing some very well rounded exercise and practice, Bre and I have been spending a lot of time playing Zelda TP. We've both been very much enjoying our adventures through Hyrule together, and we're thinking of actually playing the whole Zelda timeline through, but that would take a while. Some of the games like Twilight Princess sure as Hell aren't short. Besides that we've been making a lot of progress. I still can't see her imposed, but I can really feel where she is, and sometimes my vision kinda... blurs... where she's sitting or standing, like my brain is trying to smudge reality out of the way in attempt to sticker my imagination there. I proxied for her for someone today, she for the most part possessed my arms and typed to them over Steam chat. However she was unexpectedly very nervous. She's not usually scared of very many things, but I guess the fear helps define her more as a person. Also when I lacked the emotional energy to do much earlier she comforted me and actually possessed me and made me tea and all that. She did that. She got me up, and made me tea. Well, rather she got up and made tea. I wasn't comfortable with trying to fall back into the wonderland and attempt to make it a full fledge switch though, I felt like ripping my attention off the body would just make us collapse and fall into the wonderland together or something... It's probably doubt that keeps me from being able to do these things, but we'll get there. It's just going to take some time, and I'm pretty happy with our progress right now.
  15. ENTRY 27 Darnit Google, being so smart, and having such a good memory, and being so amazing that it even has a sensible, provable religion about it... Well, redrew Bre's hair. Much more accurate to what she's intended now. Visualising should be a cake walk with about 30% more frosting now. Sorry for bad lighting and all. That's all I've got for you for now, maybe I'll report more later. Bre and I have been playing Zelda TP and watching Friendship is Witchcraft.
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