Jump to content

Darlene

Members
  • Posts

    44
  • Joined

  • Last visited

2 Followers

Personal Information

  • Gender
    Female

Recent Profile Visitors

The recent visitors block is disabled and is not being shown to other users.

  1. [Darlene] I don't think I've had a bad day in years. [Ashley] not since she used to get in trouble all the time. That was like month two. @Desmond [Misha] yes! Ashley's birthday is tomorrow and mine's on Monday.
  2. Our system is three years old, a lot has happened...
  3. It's also *my* birthday! Wow, happy birthday everyone!
  4. Hello Matsie. They're getting ready to start my portrait soon. I think they want a full body shot this time, we'll see.
  5. [Ren] I think we'll watch it if it ever becomes available free on demand. I feel compelled somehow. =^-^= [Misha] I'm waiting for Bunnies, the Musical! Would it bother you more if it wasn't Touhou or if it was?
  6. Banned for not receiving the spirit of Christmas
  7. Banned for not having a Christmas themed avatar on Christmas
  8. [Darlene] What would you say your definition of ego is, and how it applies to tulpamancy. Is there one ego that represents the host, (as in tulpas are egoless), an ego for each of you, or perhaps a shared ego that is a culmination of everyone in the system? [bear] To me, ego is: that set of habbits, instincts, beliefs, morals, Body OS functions, basically anything that relates the true you to the material world and is responsible for your behavior when you're not thinking with any clarity. Reactions, triggers, emotions, gut instincts would all be ego. I believe it's an integration or summation of all your experiences, routines, reinforced and copied, the ego is your shadow, it knows everything you do, and drives desire based on rewards and aversions. It has to be then, that I (my true self, that self that can switch out) am not precisely ego, and my headmates are not bound by my ego completely either. If my ego contains a fear, my headmates don't share it. If my ego contains a trigger, my headmates are often immune. My ego must contain the essence of habbits and damage I've taken throughout my life, again, my headmates are inmune to most*. *However; though they're seemingly immune to the ego and preconceptions, fears, aversions and desires prior to our joining in April 2018, they do happen to be susceptible to the parts of ego that developed after that. This is incredibly interesting, please don't miss this point. Blending aside, Darlene, Ashley, and Misha all seemed to be affected by the habbits we accumulated or practiced together or that I did while they were with me, histrionics, tulpamancy related triggers, and habbits I picked up in the last 19 months. However, Joy doesn't share our penchant for drama, she doesn't get offended by mere interactions, she's resolute and stoic in the face of agression and heated debate. She's virtually triggerless in this realm. She has triggers from her past, but they're so fanciful that they've never come up. The fact that Ashley can do my job without distraction, Gwen doesn't feel any compulsion to post, she wasn't with us, she didn't do it and still doesn't (other than in the Three Sisters Play that she greatly enjoys and doesn't mind sharing), and Ren is on her own frequency entirely, her mind is somewhat alien to me, her desires are not generic, and they don't follow mine, gave me this notion that we don't share an ego. So I must conclude that we do have overlapping egos, but they are tied to what is 'us' separately, and those things we blame on Body OS only apply to some of us depending on what it is, it's not correct to say Body OS is the ego, in my current understanding. It can therefore be that your typical tulpamancer isn't going through the changes I went through i.e. overcome depression, and other life changes in the last 19 months, so their ego is somewhat more static, their actions are more repetitive, and their newly formed tulpas' egos basically conform to status quo. For traumas we suffered together, that damage is owned by all of us. Whether one of us is directly involved or not, if we're involved in some way, than sympathetically or empathetically, it is shared. By contrast, Joy blips out when we are in our moods. She sends us to the corner when we emote. She wants nothing to do with my daily trials. Her ego is then left free from reinforcement of my bad habbits. She likes to say 'them' when referring to us, she likes to keep that separation. I found that just saying that 'the Body OS is shared habbits' wasn't fully describing the data. It doesn't for us. Joy simply has no urge to emote. Misha and I now emote together most times. Ashley has her own subset. (Even Darlene has triggers.) This was accrued because of my suffering in the depths of my depression while they were with me, not before. Joy, Gwen and Ren weren't there for that. My ego then is many levels deeper, an order of magnitude more worn by the many years as a singlet. What significance does this have to tulpamancy? I see many practical and many controversial applications here. If you could quickly join a member to your system (keeping them dormant during your bad habbits) and let them switch in only during those times when they won't be affected or damaged, then they'd be as close to a pristine person as you could have, able to handle situations where your own hangups could limit you. (Assuming you can switch obviously.) In our case, Joy is re-teaching the group by her innate ability to handle agressive situations, and her triggerless ego, in this way, the hope is that she is wiping out our penchant for overreaction. Only time will tell. [Darlene] I found this particularly relevant to us, but wanted to share and get your thoughts on it here. We appropriated the word 'ego' in an effort to stay away from other well used words here in the tulpamancy community, but I don't think we changed it so dramatically that it doesn't still apply to spirituality, and particularly, the contentious definitions of ego they wrestle with. So if your definition of ego differs greatly, please let us know, we asked for your definition, but please take a step back and take this appropriation with a grain of salt and leave out semantics debate in this discussion for the purposes of staying on topic, if you can.
  9. If I may, I'd like to try to bring the more positive and helpful aspects of spirituality and religion to tulpamancy in this thread. It would be like a lounge thread in that anything goes as far as supportive comments, but we want to stay relatively serious and on topic. Since it's really not appropriate to the science based mission of tulpa.info to discuss spirituality freely, it's here in the metaphysical section. Specifically, I'd like to share metaphysical or siritual experiences, thoughts and experiences that we hold back normally in our PR, but would still love to share and discuss. Anyone is welcome to come and comment, but this isn't an appropriate place to debate science versus metaphysics, it should be a safe place to exchange ideas about sprituality or religion in a civil discourse. If a thread like this has been done before, let's leave that burried and start anew rather than combine them; however, anything new that may seem appropriate here is welcome to be merged here. I'll give the moderators a chance to think about allowing this thread. My argument would be: this is a quality of life improvement thread, not in any way attempting to convert anyone, it would be just a place for concepts and ideas that aren't supported by science yet, but it would be wonderful if we could bridge concepts here to science eventually. In our mind, everything is potentially science, if you can experience it, there must be an explanation somewhere. Again this isn't neccesarily the place to explain it, people shouldn't have to defend their beliefs here. You may politely offer an alternative viewpoint, but hopefully without dismissing their experiences.
  10. That sounds so cute. Hi Jamie, Cassidy and Gavin.
  11. [Darlene] I believe Ashley was doing it wrong. [bear] it kinda just tasted like pure sugar with her, it frankly tasted best with Darlene eating it, I mean, fully 20% better. [Ashley] how is this a thing? [Misha] it tasted fine to me. [bear] I just remembered that I have other systemmates... oops looks like I owe Gwen, Joy and Ren chocolate.
  12. [Darlene] (Angel) but they're very resilient. [bear] and naturally base
  13. (Angel) It's the thought that counts.
×
×
  • Create New...