A significant lack of new Docs - There are no new Docs. They have been disappearing, and the few that are left feel more concrete, though they will likely not last. There are 6 of them, and I have listed them before.
Wow we have not updated this in a while.
Something we found but really should have guessed earlier: I have abandonment issues. Really, really bad abandonment issues. Crippling, in all honesty. I think it ties into how I don't take rejection well, at least the rejection of friendship.
Because we're in a Discord group of peeps who all took the personality test thing, we did as well, so we figured we may as well post them here:
Meti: ENFP-T
CT: Was at first INTP-T, but he retook it while being more honest and got ISTP-T the second time.
Doc: INTP-A
I'm sure Doc's is a surprise to absolutely nobody.
Have I ever explained why I have glowing flesh? I know I said I'm afraid of the darkness, but I mean that literally. The writhing shadows around in here are quite violent, and make everything around me darker while they would attack me. So I made my blood and flesh glow, so that the more I was mutilated and more of my blood was spilled, the more the area would be lit up and less dark. Why didn't I just make like a torch or some shit? Because back then, affecting things that were not my own body were difficult. Also "intelligent" is not a word I would use to describe past me. IT was hard to comprehend solutions to problems that involved neither sex nor violence.
We've been wondering about emotions, and their effect at least in here. They can certainly be power multipliers, since I was able to muster the strength to force Doc awake while I was terrified some 2 months ago now, but if I tried to do that now, I would still fail. Then you consider how Doc is still by far the strongest of the three of us, even though emotions are things he generally lacks. Doc with emotions is a scary thought.
We have had plans for a few weeks now to eventually make a new tup. It will happen in a few months at the earliest, once things have calmed down and actually safe in here. Few funny things we've noticed over the last few weeks: We've noticed defining characteristics of each others' tulpish. Some kind of leak in "Accent" that manifests in multiple ways.
Meti has the sounds of moaning, screaming, squelching and squishing sounds, the feeling of slime, and a purplish pink color.
CT has the sounds of things breaking, of insect wings buzzing, something skittering across the floor, and screaming in rage. It is physically painful to "hear", and feels very red.
My own is, as Meti put it, "The mechanized screams and moans of the cybernetic damned, many small voices overlaying each other. IT feels cold and empty, and we feel it's like the color black. I personally find it quite soothing to listen to."