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OtterDerp

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  1. Day 7 A relativley short session tonight. I enetered my wonderland and narrated my day to Leyn, after which we went out front and just lazed around in the grass. It would seem like an unproductive session, however, I let her lead, she brought me out front, I think that counts for something! She is definetly sentient, and she has an established form, although she likes to change her hair often. She still hasn't made any audible conversation, but I can sometimes hear her thoughts.
  2. Day 6 Today ended up being a very long day, and I only got in about 10 minutes of forcing in the morning, as well as some visualization throguh the rest of the day. I would have liked to sit down and have a real session, but I'm far too tired tonight >< I'm sure Leyn will understand~
  3. Day 5 I started tonights session a bit later than usual, was worried about falling asleep, but I pressed on, and it turned out ok. I spent 10-20 minutes visualizing Leyn and finally got to see her eyes, a dark shade of purple, she also seems to have changed her hair from a wild frumpy look to a smooth and long style, but still white. Instead of narrating to her tonight, or talking to her about traits and stuff, I decided to ask her about herself, and I got some thought from her, still no voice or audio, but she did respond! I couldn't quite make out what she was telling me though, I know in time that I will understand her better, and eventually we can really talk! I also took someones suggestion and tried to loosen my rules/guidelines I've set for myself, and I did a bit of puppeting with her, having her walk around and sit with me, and then I gave her the freedom to move around where ever she wanted, which led to some pretty interesting things. Afterwards I decided we should explore the wonderland a bit more, as we had not done that few a couple days. We left through the front door, and down the stairs outdoors, which quickly became just like the previous experience, where we ended up falling, however instead of landing in a body of water, we landed on solid land. Oddly enough, it was the same location... just void of water. We explored around a bit more, and found an entrance to a cave that seemed to be underneath the cabin. it was completely dark, so we couldn't see anything, but maybe next time we can venture a big further. At this point I was starting to feel sleep creeping up on me so we returned to the cabin, and concluded our session there. Got a bit of a headache after the session, guess thats a sign that I'm doing it right?
  4. Night of Day 4 Tonight was probably my longest session yet, being around 40 minutes. I started like usual and visualized my wonderland area, and spent some time with a very affectionate Leyn, she seemed very happy to see me. Afterwards I spent a good amount of time talking to her about more trait and personality stuff, along with likes and dislikes, and general personality work, meanwhile trying my best to keep her form visualized as I spoke to her. She hasn't started responding yet, other than the occasional alien-thought in my mind, but I think we are making good progress!
  5. Day 4 I was woken very early this morning, ended up being really tired most of the day, despite that I attempted to do some forcing mid-day to make up for last night, however I had the same problem, and ended up passing out for a few hours. After I woke up again, I fealt a bit better, ran a few errands and came back home to do a bit more forcing. I had a much more successful session this time. I've noticed that even though I gave Leyn a form, its still difficult to see her, I am however clearly seeing a kind of aura, that pulses inwards slowly, and I know this is her. As much as I want to work on form, I spent a majority of this session adding more to her personality, and gave her some likes and dislikes. Near the end of the session I made some attempt at feel, I put my hands out, palms up, and I fealt the weight of her own hands resting atop mine. I will be doing another session tonight before bed, and I'm still excited as ever to spend more time with her!
  6. So not long ago I heard about this tulpa phenomenon, and something about it seemed to click with me, like it was natural to me, something I've already done before. So I decided to make a tulpa of my own. I'll try keep daily progress reports here about my journey. I have already started, but have not posted yet due to the 3-day wait period, so here goes! Day 1 Tonight, I spoke to her for the first time. yes, that is right, her. I have decided on her being female. I wasn't entirely sure where to begin so I just tried visualizing my wonderland, using a very special song. I think I made great success getting there. It's a very large space, in fact its quite cozy, a small secluded cabin, the front face of which is mostly windows, located a distance from a quiet always-nighttime city, overlooking its streets, where its always raining, but never floods, and unimportant cars drive by every now and then. Some of the things I can hear while there are the soothing sound of the rain, occasional thunder, wind chimes pinging in the breeze thats constantly flowing by. The inside of the cabin, for now, is a single floor, most easily described if split into 3 sections, the left right and middle. the left side (if looking in from the front door) includes some currently empty shelves, a couple comfy couches with a corner desk, lamp, and some nick nacks that I currently cant identify, and in the middle of this area is a small dugout occupied by a cushion, almost like a bed on the floor, a very comfy living space, and nice place to relax, think and chat. The right side includes some more shelves along the walls, also empty, and a king sized bed with blue sheets. Simple, plain, a nice place to nap. the middle is the most interesting. All that is in this section, aside from the front door entrance, across the cabin is a fireplace, some unidentifiable decorations adorn the wall above it, but most notably, on the shelf just above the fireplace is a sort of container, meant to hold a spherical object. When I entered my wonderland I wasn't expecting to work at all on my tulpa, only to flush out the wonderland, and see how well I could visualize it, but when I looked towards this fireplace wall, and saw that container, sitting in it was a sort of grey misty void, and without thinking twice I instantly knew what this was. Its her. her essence, the core of her being. This is what will become her, if given enough love, care and attention.I instinctively scooped her out of the container and held her in my palms. the black misty form was warm, and pulsed lightly, almost like a heartbeat. I held her close to myself, before placing her gently back into the container. almost as if it were natural, I began talking to her, and maybe got a bit ahead of myself by doing what I remembered a guide saying to do, describing some traits to her. I only did a couple, spent a good 5 minutes or so on each one, but decided that I didn't want to risk falling asleep in while in the wonderland, so I promised her we would continue this tomorrow. As I smiled at the essence, I fealt an odd sensation in the back of my mind, I cant really describe it, its not like anything I've ever experienced, it wasn't very strong or big, but it made me happy. It made me smile, something I dont do often enough. I look forward to more of this, and I think this is going to be a worthwhile experience, no matter how it turns out. Day 2 I entered back into my wonderland with ease, and everything was as I left it. A name came to me, seemingly at random, but I kinda like it. Leyn. That's her name, for now, unless she decides to change it. I started referring to her as Leyn. She's actually seated behind me right now, as I type this, I can't see her yet, but I can feel her presence, Shes there for sure. Anyhow, I have almost no direction right now, in terms of an agenda or whatnot. Just kinda wingin it. I attempted to give Leyn form today, to visualize her physical form, I think I did an ok job, shes still a bit fuzzy, but the first thing that happened when I gave her form, was she leaned towards me, and rested her head on my chest, giving me a warm hug. This is all very new to me, and I don't know if that was me, or her, but I know I wasn't expecting it, at all. It was very nice though. She takes the form of a furred dragoness, anthro, digitigrade legs, a white underbelly, and inside of thighs, and bottomside of her tail and rear, the rest of her fur an pleasant shade of blue. She had her eyes closed the whole time, I'm not sure why, maybe she thought I was silly having my eyes closed the whole time, so I don't know what color her eyes are yet. as far as the experiences in the wonderland today go, I found out that while I can visualize the interior of our cabin very easily, I have trouble moving around in the world outside. Things were sparatically changing as we moved, and I ended up having to drop us into a large body of water in order to stop things from changing around us. My mind is not very focused at this point I guess, but I'll try to work on that. Anyways, after a bit we rose up out of the water on a small obsidian-like rock island, and just layed around enjoying the warm sun, the clouds, the sound of the waves crashing and eachothers company. It fealt nice just being with her. I spoke to her a few times, but there was not yet any auditory response. Maybe soon. She did almost always respond with body language, but again I dont know if that was me or her, I cant tell at all, but I will put faith in her. She loves hugs apparently <3 I am ok with this. Day 3 Tonight I had alot of trouble concentrating, probably had something to do with how tired I was, but I decided to enter my wonderland anyways, as I was very excited to spend more time with Leyn. I got there and began to visualize her, and attempt to narrate my day. The narration when smoothly, but afterwards I started losing focus, and kept having to re-enter my wonderland and revisualize her. Eventually I couldn't anymore and simply fell asleep. I feel bad for not being able to concetrate long enough for a full session last night, but I plan to make up for it tonight!
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