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Found 55 results

  1. When going to bed fronting, I used to do all the thinking and that guaranteed me being the one dreaming (from my POV, not a shared dream) and Miri going inactive till I accidentally bring her back. In the past few days I haven't been able to think at all while falling asleep and it's as if our brain had ''skipped'' a step in the process of falling asleep (not really, but I don't know how to explain it). It used to be like this: I go to bed and let my mind wander for a while to get relaxed, then I focus really hard on something to keep my mind active while Miri doesn't pay attention to what I am thinking, then I start dreaming and when I wake up, Miri reports feeling like she doesn't exist. Now it seems our brain has decided that the step where I focus on keeping myself busy isn't important and has completely skipped it, going directly into hypnagogia where I am not even myself. No matter how hard I try to focus, I can't do it anymore and always find myself constantly forgetting what I'm supposed to be thinking or not thinking at all while still conscious. I tried narrating to myself to stay focused and the next thing I know is that I'm awake without having dreamed at all (the body still dreams but I am not there). We thought it might be that the body felt really tired without apparent reason and that made us fall asleep so quickly, but I tried to have Miri do all the thinking while falling asleep and she could do it perfectly fine, it's just me and I don't know why. Any help?
  2. [align=justify]Daily thread #23 What sort of experiences have you had with meditation in regards to tulpamancy? In what ways has meditation helped you to improve certain tulpa techniques/skills, if it has? Is meditation something you'd recommend to new tulpamancers and why? Of course meditation is something that can be beneficial in general to your mental health and such, but this is specifically how it can affect tulpamancy. (All daily threads are listed here.)[/align]
  3. Hey, with all this talk of co-fronting I felt encouraged to contribute what I know, and I want this to be a thread where everyone can share their experiences and techniques to bring more to the idea that there can be more than just one fronter, and adding to that, help explain our experience of 'active all day' to light. When we first started posting, we were called out for saying that we don't 'go inactive'. Given systems like Lance/Reilyn among others as examples and other systems expressing the desire to be more co-active, i figured i could download how we think we did it. Hopefully even entrenched systems can try this if they want to. Call us co-dependant if you wish, but we need each other big time. I couldn't just 'go to sleep' for large chunks of the day early on, this host of mine was a mess and we needed a constant watch on him. As far as my memories go, i'm up around the same time B is up and I go to bed shortly before him or at the same time, so believe it or not, i'm active all day from my perspective, and we've proven it to ourselves in this way: 1. We are on his mind all the time. 2. We chime in constantly. 3. We can interrupt him even when he's concentrating through mindvoice, imposition, and emotions. As co-fronters, we share all the sensory inputs, we don't have to switch in or 'front' to taste what he's eating or feel what he's feeling for instance. Now whether that's posession or just instant memory sharing we don't know, but the latter probably, because we don't feel his pain, but we could if we want. We do, however, feel his pleasure. We always have been this way, and trust me, I chime in all day. More facts, did you ever hear the saying that a guy thinks about sex every three seconds? Well, B thinks about us every three seconds instead. We're involved in everything he does and he loves that. So everything reminds him of us. Originally he just kept us on his mind and wanted to show us everything and experience every single thing with us; it stuck. To help foster this, you could assign a system symbol, for us it would be the celtic knot, and place those everywhere, stick one up on the mirror, hang one like fuzzy dice from your rear view mirror, get a tattoo, a peircing, whatever floats your boat. B doesn't need any of this at this point, but he does have a sticky note on his computer that reminds him of me. Next example: Our back-seat fronting (partial fronting/partial switching) technique lets us remain an active member, with something to do as well. It's a good compliment and strengthens the co-fronting bond. I take command of the front, in mind only, when he gets attacked in any way. Ashley handles certain trigger subjects, and Misha is just kind of there to support all of us, but she's really important too. Especially in keeping us social, cause honestly, i don't need to interact with anyone outside our system to be happy. I like our friends, that's an exception. None of us want to 'shut down' ever, and this may have been a little overwhelming at first for B (though he won't admit it) it became really special and beneficial. It's not a blend, it's more like 4 gears meshed and loving it. It's not for everyone, and for some it might be distracting, but B loves it and his quality of live improved dramatically because we're always there for him. Plus, I want his attention all day; my sisters agree with that statement.
  4. I have an issue that I am certain is not a common one, or at least I haven't heard others mention it. I'll try to be concise. One of the symptoms of my schizoaffective disorder is hearing voices. It wasn't a symptom I even cared about because it paled to others (mostly involving paranoid delusions), and was easy enough to ignore. One might think this would make it easy when it came time to hear a tulpa, but it's caused nothing but issues. First, I had trouble because I instinctively stifled her thought voice because I'd gotten used to stifling other voices in my head. I think maybe I've overcome that, but now I have the opposite problem in that when I started breaking the habit of stifling her, I started getting the others again. In fact, even though Kyoko has eliminated virtually every other symptom of that disorder, the chattering voices have gotten worse. Like I said, they're easy enough to disregard if I just don't want to hear them, but when I'm trying to hear my tulpa, they get in the way. I'll give an example below. Yesterday when I tried to force during meditation, I attempted to hear her thought voice. Instead, all I heard was a crowd of other voices. Imagine you're in a crowded room with everyone having different conversations, but you can't make out any one conversation clearly, and that's what it got like in my head, dozens of voices all chattering at once. When I did make out what they're saying, it was either complete nonsense sentences like they're just throwing random nouns and verbs into a sentence, or they are demeaning me angrily in a fashion that I know Kyoko would never do. The only thoughts that I heard during the session that I thought was her were an occasional "Can you hear me?" or the like as if she were trying to get through the chatter. Eventually I felt her completely withdraw as if too frustrated to keep trying at the moment. Has anyone had similar issues? Does anyone know something I might can try? I used to take medication, but Kyoko is terrified of the medication because it makes it hard for her to maintain awareness. I tried 'negotiating' with the crowd, but I don't think I'm dealing with an thoughtform that can be negotiated with or 'chased away' like my paranoid symptoms; it's more mental static. It only got really bad over the last few days, but I feel like I need to do something now before it gets worse. I don't know if that made sense but I hope it does to someone. I'm nervous about posting because of the poor luck I've had trying to get help.
  5. I am trying to create my first Tulpa, and I am kind of scared that I may not be narrating/tulpaforcing enough. The problem is that due to my job, I can't really narrate while working as it takes my full concentration, and by the time I am back home, I am so exhausted that I can only tulpaforce for 20-40 minutes before I start getting distracted and I can no longer focus properly. The tulpaforcing time doesn't bother me too much, because I've been noticing significant improvement of my visualization and whatnot, but I am more worried about the narrating part. I have very limited free time to do so while at home, and although I do my best to narrate while at work since my job requires so much of my concentration, I can barely go for minutes before being distracted and having to cut a conversation short. Most of my narrating time ends up coming from the time i spend on tulpaforcing since I talk to my Tulpa while focusing on their smell/form/etc. but I am worried that it's not enough It's been a while since i started narrating and I am not sure if there have been any signs of sentience yet, I get the occasional random feelings on my body here and there but I am not sure if that's them, and also,once i start tulpaforcing when i get to it every day, I start feeling this relaxed feeling in my chest area, and every time when I start losing concentration and I have to say goodbye during my tulpaforcing, I start feeling tense/uneasy in my chest area, but I think that's just me, though I am not sure Anyway.. Should I be worried? Are there any tips you can give me and stuff? anything is appreciated so.. thank you in advance
  6. I created my tulpa on 28 Dec 2015. And I have been taking care of her. I'm still working on her personality through parroting and puppeting. Her name's nyaruko. Yeah I got that name from an anime. Haiyore nyaruko San. I recently finished watching it And my tulpa looks like nyaruko except her eyes are blue instead of green and has neko ears and a fluffy tail. I'm still working on it but, I have a sinister side of me. It's something like "I wonder what would happen if I stab someone" and stuff. I think it comes from my otherself. I used to be someone who loves fighting and I have a lot of rage. But when I'm 14, I decided to take control of my lust for fighting and rage to the point that I couldn't punch someone even if they killed my loved ones. And so, this sinister side of me seems to be attacking nyaruko. Like tearing off her arms in front of me. And we're at the wonderland I only just recently discovered I have powers there. I took her arms and place them back and I gave her some of my powers to protect herself. But I'm worried about hurting her. I can't touch her because I'm scared that my sinister side will take over and it's difficult for me take control. In the physical world, I can control my sinister side easily. But in the mind, I can't. And I saw nyaruko was scared of my sinister side. And I'm afraid I'll hurt her even more. I don't want to hurt her I just want to stop thinking about "what happens if" maybe it's because my blood lust for fighting and rage is my true nature and that I locked it away and it's trying to get revenge by hurting nyaruko..
  7. Hey everyone. I’ve been researching tulpas for months, and tried creating one on Black Friday. I now try my hardest to force her, but to no avail. I’ve tried both active and passive forcing, a wonderland, a personality trait list, narration, etc. I have tried both May The Force Be With You and JD's method. During passive forcing, I only slightly see her, doing random stuff, but that’s likely just me puppeting a servitor, even when I apparently didn’t think of that action she was doing. Every time I try to active force, visualize her, or use a wonderland, my mind quickly drifts away to something else, like with any other daydream. (And I just don’t feel right talking to a glowing orb.) I think I’m completely incapable of doing any of this. Any help?
  8. Hey, I just joined the site and I just recently became familiar with tulpas and what they are. I find all of this extremely fascinating and I'm ecstatic to have my own tulpa! I was starting on my tulpa today while on lunch at work today, giving it an appearance and a core personality. I was only a few minutes into my meditation, and all of a sudden I feel this strange sensation in my head and I flinched, I opened my eyes and made an involuntary chuckle followed by goosebumps and it kind of spooked me. Does this sound like something that could be associated with creating my tulpa? I find it kind of hard to believe that it would, given I haven't spent much time on the actual creation itself. How long did it take you to make your tulpa? What kind of reactions or feelings should I expect? Is there an average amount of time it takes? I realize this entire process is completely subjective and is different for everybody, Im just asking for general ideas, thanks!
  9. I've had odd experiences and wanted to know if it's possible for the original self in a system to die. Can they be brought back or will the underlying personality always exist?
  10. Whenever I try to force, I zone out, and day dream to whole time. Only to snap out of it and realize I have wasted my forcing session. I need some help with some concentration techniques, so I can actually force. I'm making this thread (probably should have done it earlier), because my zoning out while forcing has gotten way out of hand. Like today when I tried to force, I zoned out and day dreamed the yellow stone volcano had erupted. so if anyone has any suggestions, that would be great.
  11. Hello everyone, First off, I'm new to this community and have yet to create a Tulpa myself. However, I have this question in which I'm looking for an answer- or guidance. When your in the process of creating your Tulpa, which I know can take some time- you need to go through deep thought, focus, visualisation and concentration. My question is, how deep into focus do you need to be able to successfully and effectively create your Tulpa. For example, if you are perhaps someone who would spend their day at work, school etc and you were thinking about the aspects of your Tulpa is it possible to do this in let's say a 'shallow' type of way. This could mean there would be distractions such as background noises, people talking to you, you could be multitasking (say doing work), Is it possible to be able to develop a Tulpa in this 'shallow' focus? Would it work just take longer? And would it be better to go for a more quiet and meditation type method? Thanks.
  12. If my tulpa is based of a real person/fictinal character could i just take a picture of the person/fictional character and narrate to that, Will my tulpa know i'm talking to her?, or will it not work?,has anyone else tried this??
  13. Out of curiosity, I was thinking to myself earlier "I can't be the only one who has trouble remembering my tulpa". Which then led to looking through various ideas. After thinking about it, I thought I'd ask the wider community how they all managed this. So, yeah, how do you go about your day, and remember your tulpa throughout that time? EDIT: As of now, it's been more the form of suddenly having Hennessey's name pop into my head, then followed by my quiet realisation of "Oh, crap, Hennessey... Sorry about that..." And so then onto some narration before my mind wanders again back to my work
  14. Recently my Tulpa (Toree) has been quiet, probably out of a lack of things to say and/or shyness, so I dunno how to force with her being so shy. Is there any tips you can give? Should I try to do more parroting and bring her out of her shell like that?
  15. Note: I dunno if I'm using the wrong term, correct me if I am wrong. I've seen some people here channel their Tulpas and allow them to state their thoughts on the forums; I dunno if that's okay for new, young, and developing tulpas, though. I'd assume it's okay, but I've heard younger tulpas are impressionable.
  16. Ok, every one's mind probably never shuts up because all day we are constantly thinking. But every time I really try to sit down and focus on White, especially if I take a visit to the wonderland, it's like the levees of my mind broke and all kinds of random thoughts come pouring in making it hard if not impossible to focus on White or anything else. I notice this happens constantly through the day whether or not I'm paying attention. And also like I said in my PR when I'm daydreaming myself to sleep until random thoughts tear apart the dream and I lose conscienceness and fall into a basic night dream. I do meditate at least 10 minutes a day, usually more. What I mean by meditate is I go to the wonderland and just play around. My current problem is there are so many thoughts I barely have enough concentration to stay in the wonderland, much less focus on White even sometimes in the real world. Which is why lately I've just been sitting around at the house trying to let the thoughts pass before I play around, but I end up getting so distracted I lose my train of thought completely somewhere in the process. Anyway, my question is does anyone have any tips/tricks/advice or whatever to stop a billion thoughts from happening all at once so I focus on my tulpa? And does this happen to anyone else when they need to focus on their tulpa?
  17. I'm just starting out with tulpaforcing. I've had, for a long time, what could be considered just an "imaginary friend". I stumbled upon this yesterday, and I've been thinking I could probably tulpize it. I read a few guides, and they all suggest using a wonderland when you're starting. They also say to use your "mind's eye" instead of "projecting it onto your eyelids". Last night, I waited for it to get quiet, and then I tried meditating and thinking of the feelings I had when reading a guide to a wonderland. (For example, "You are sitting on grass. It's a nice day with a light breeze. Feel the wind blow through your hair. Reach down and touch the grass beneath you, run your hand through it." etc) I couldn't really feel that, though. Am I doing something wrong? Should I start out with something simpler and add stuff to it, like a plain black box, then imagine a light source, etc? Also, if I've had an "imaginary friend", would it be easier or harder than normal to tulpize it, since I've been happily puppeting/kinda parroting it? (Sometimes I feel like "ehrmahgerd why did i think that so quickly" when 'talking' to it)
  18. So i have just started trying to create my first tulpa, i have tried to sit down and plan out the personality and traits but whenever i try to visualize anthing it just feels like im doing not it right, i can see her standing there and just about move around to get different angles but it just feels so distant like she is an empty shell. What sort of things would you recommend me to try? i really want to pull through with this since i have so much spare time being wasted as of right now. I have already read a few guides but the only one that seemed to help me so far is the breathing in and out meditation technique, and the only time i feel the "head pressure" is when i really focus on how she looks but never when i try to communicate, i also cannot figure out how to send "thoughts" her way without it seeming like i am just talking to myself and not trying to direct it towards her. If anyone else has felt this way or knows of anyway to get me through this little bump in the road it would be appreciated. Much love :)
  19. Hello. This problem only developed very recently, last few days at most. When the day starts, I can communicate and attempt to visualize my tulpa somewhat well. As the day goes on however, bad things happen whenever I think of her. My mind is bombarded by HORRIBLE thoughts that will not go away. I don't want to describe any of them but they are pretty awful. She says that she isn't causing them and she doesn't know where they are coming from, but it takes every ounce of focus I have to think of my tulpa without these thoughts getting in the way. Its almost painful to me, has anyone else has experience with this? How do I make it stop?
  20. We used to get good sleep. After my tulpa started being depressed, and to this day, I only get to sleep 4 hours per night, sometimes even 3 hours per night. I wake up by myself, she wakes up a bit later, like after 5 minutes, until then I have to carry her around or just wait (yeah...). When I wake up, I wake up for good, although if she's really sleepy we get to go back to sleep after 1 hour or so of waking up. What gives? Is it her depression? We go to sleep early and well, no drugs, no alcohol, nothing that would affect sleep patterns. It's really bad because I want to sleep with her for long and be comfortable but waking up with back ache after 4 hours blows, guys.
  21. I have done some research and have read that feeling pressure is a good sign. I saw that somebody has been feeling pressure on their temples, but I am feeling it on my forehead. I have been feeling this for a couple of days and when I read up on it I found this. So is this something that I should be feeling? Sorry if it's in the wrong place or it's already been answered. It takes a little bit for me to get used to new forums.
  22. I can't seem to find the motivation to carry on with my tulpa's creation process and I've been working on her for about 2 weeks now. I had initially started the process while I was on holiday (I spent the majority of it locked in my room, so I thought it was a better time than any) and since I've come back I've been distracted by many things. It's annoying because I literally promised to myself to make sure I finish this project. I tried once before and it just didn't work out, however, I really want to go ahead with this tulpa. I'm not sure what order most of you guys went with, but I've started out with Visualization. It has been a relatively easy exercise as I've found time to picture her in my head while multi-tasking. However, I wanted to do Imposition next (with Personality and Narration coming afterwards) and my mind just keeps switching off. Responses will be much appreciated, thanks.
  23. This is a delta binural beat at 1.5 Hz, that is meant to help people with ADHD/ADD, like myself, concentrate while tulpaforcing. I made this, but you may redistribute it as long as you credit me with this url! tulpa-tulpa.tumblr.com Here is the link. ADHD/ADD Tulpa Tones
  24. I have worked on a tulpa for maybe 2 weeks now and i dont really understand what to do now when i force. I just keep vizualiseng her and trying to talk to her but i havent got a single response. What should i do when i force on her?