My First Tulpa 'Alyson'

[BauerBird]

So I've been reading up on Tulpas and what have you, I'm sure you all know you did a bunch of research and believed this to be an amazing journey, so with about 10 -14 hours of research and planning of my Tulpa, I found that I'd adopt a few methods here and there, but mostly go about it my own way. So I've rounded up some base personality traits and put as much detail into a definition for each of them as I possibly can and how they would interact with each other and with emotions and tried to gather a sort of image for her form in my head, and I'd really like for her to appear as a human as much as possible but whether I can actually accomplish that is another question, so for now I've seemed to have her form take as a glass ball of light.

 

From what I've read the Tulpa concept, to me, seems completely plausible, and makes sense; I've wanted to be a forensic psychologist for a good long while now but my OP score is a bit of a jumble so I'm working with the University to see how I can get into the courses I want, and due to that I've done what seems like too much research into psychology and I can't describe how but Tulpas make sense.

 

Anyhow, It took me a while to grasp what I was actually supposed to be doing in these forcing sessions, but I ended up getting the concept. It feels like one of those trick questions in an exam, I didn't really believe you just imagine, I thought you'd have to put yourself in a hypnotic state or something, but no you really just imagine, like how they describe the mind's eye, so If you were to look at the screen and imagine a red bouncy ball, you can see it, but you can still see the screen, I found I got confused by that until I saw someone saying "just imagine a wooden chair" and that was it, I knew what it meant.

 

Now my first session, even now I believe was a bit iffy. Basically I kind of said that "we will help each other grow" about another 3 'we will's that I can't recall which to me seemed cheesy but it feels like it makes sense and would work, so I did it regardless. At this point I kind of initiated a meet-and-greet sort of stage, where I basically gave Alyson her name and told her that we'll work together on this, and proceeded to tell her about myself which consisted of my goals in life and as a person, mostly my likes, not many dislikes, and then to my short but somewhat interesting backstory. And if anyone is reading this I don't believe you would have seen my first and previous post but here's a link https://community.tulpa.info/thread-misc-could-i-have-created-a-tulpa-without-realizing.

But basically I think I may or may have not created a Tulpa without realizing; which leads me to the next part of my session. So I kind of dribbled on a bit about some of my backstory which made the meet and greet nearly an hour, and after I kind of just gave a brief rundown of her personality traits and around 15 mins in I was kind of losing my train of thought, messing up sentences and the way I was supposed to be explaining it, so I said "Sorry, I'm kind of a bit nervous" and very clearly got a response "It's okay" which I thought wasn't exactly supposed to happen early on, little own the first real session; but if I was to put the response to sound (which it didn't really feel like) it was a bit robotic like a Text-To-speech engine, but more smoothed out, I guess kind of like how Goldeen sounds from Pokemon, so kind of a deep hazy kind of tone. and so I went on with the rest for about another hour and nearly a half.

 

But before the complete end of the session, I visualized the titles/words of the personality traits I described and kind squeezed what was first a juice but when mixed together made a kind of elasticy slime, and basically just place it on Alyson or this glass white ball of light and once it sunk in the outer surface of the ball became transparent and inside was a solid kind of matte white orb floating inside where the goo sunk into and for a second made rainbow flashes and then manifested itself kind of like building blocks coming out of the orb and then the outer surface of the ball started flashing rainbow like the inner orb and then went glowing white again. After that I kind of said goodbye Alyson, I'll be back, but not in that wording somehow.

 

So all in all it's a start, of what is an extremely long and sometimes challenging process, but I made the commitment, and I have to stick with it.

 

Also If I could improve on anything in any way or if I did something wrong or probably not as I should have I really wouldn't mind some constructive criticism/feedback.