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Okay, so maybe Bruce responded some. We were just chilling in wonderland together and then suddenly he smiles at me, yeah? I didn't even realize until I was smiling back. Maybe it's a sign that things are going well.

So, I was forcing last night, and I think we had a pretty big break through. He still hasn't spoken, but he was smiling and nodding and shaking his head and things like that, which is pretty exciting, since any response was encouraging. He laughed and I was able to get a hug from him.

I tried to draw him, but I'm not the best artist in the world, but it was fun still. It's been almost a month and I think we have made amazing progress. I'm pretty fucking proud.

It was our first holiday together. I made sure to force as we watched fireworks and exploded gun powder. It was badass. I played with a sparkler and everything. It was my first 4th of July, too.

I also skyped my friends. I even remembered to force then, I kept joking and calling them dorks to him in my head. All in all, a good day.

Nothing spectacular has happened. Some days he seems more responsive than others, smiling with me and laughing a little, but some days he doesn't seem to respond to anything at all, and those days make me worry about the days he doesn't "respond". I certainly don't want to be parroting him, but I'll follow the advice I know anyone would give me, "give him the benefit of the doubt, assume it's him," even though it's hard to do that. You would think a tulpa making a tulpa would be much easier, since belief shouldn't be an issue. That doesn't seem to be the case, as I feel very skeptical of every little reaction I get from him. I don't know what to do but wait this out and try to enjoy the time we have together.

I have been forcing daily, though since we are working long hours, generally 12 hours a day, and doing school at the same time, active forcing has been an issue, but I have been making time for at least 30 minutes a day. I have been passive forcing regularly.

My host bought me a coloring book and some crayons and I colored with Bruce. That was super fun. It seems I've learned a lot about myself, from forcing Bruce, too. It's an interesting and happy experience for me.

  • 2 weeks later...

I think Bruce talked a few days ago, but I'm not sure. I haven't heard him talk since, so I'm questioning myself.

It's been a good past little while, though. I drew more pictures of him and he smiled at it, which leads me to believe that he had fun. I'm still just enjoying our time together.

Every time I speak to him, it feels like a wonderful, magical, special experience. I get a wave through my body, well, form of pure happiness. It's the happiest I've ever felt. I want to spend every moment together.

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