Old Topic Never To Be Seen Again

[Nananya]

Here I am, making a progress report. I'm not sure exactly what all to put here, because I'm immediately transformed into the most powerful spaghettimancer in existence the moment I consider doing this.

 

 

So I'll put a bit in here about the experiences of the past few days.

 

I started four days ago counting today. It's been about three days and a night, technically, but still.

 

First night: I did a bit of visualizing my wonderland. I picked a world that I've known for a couple of years. It's got a special place in my heart, and it's pretty empty. I figured it would be good for working with. I got a basic body for my tulpa set out and narrated to her a bit. I took a moment to do something else, went back to visualizing that basic body, but I couldn't remember it. I settled on another one shortly after and haven't lost sight of it yet. I narrated about until I went to sleep.

 

Second day: I started lurking a lot more in the IRC, reading the goings-on. Being insanely nervous, I spoke to my tulpa about whatever was going on. I gave her my impressions of the people of the chat, told her about a skype group I am in, talked about what was being talked about. All kinds of things like that. Still, I was really nervous talking to her, I couldn't form my thoughts too well and every time I asked a question, I was immediately flooded by "yes" and "no" repeatedly. In an effort to combat this, I decided to try using Skype to talk to her. I figured it would streamline my thoughts and make anything she said come in easier. I proposed this idea to the IRC, and asked if they thought there might be any problems with it. They said "ask 'can you hear me'", so I did. The results were a flood of just "yes". I asked what everyone thought about that, the general consensus was that it was probably not parroting when compared to the earlier "yes" and "no" that flooded me at every question. I did ask another question later, and got a singular "yes", which was interesting. I worked on seeing if I could dis/prove parroting by comparing the results to experiments: the two times I got answers that did not seem like parroting, they came halfway through the question being typed, and I continued typing fluidly. If I tried to force the thought "yes" or "no" in my typing, I would pause, as my fingers took the moment to try to type the "yes" or "no" I forced in. Later that night, I did some work on forcing. I envisioned my world and, without going into all of the little details as I've recounted so many times before, suffice it to say that I, with barely the ability to imagine a chair in my head, could make myself feel the texture and a crease in the fabric of a chair, feel stones and pillars, and feel a pressure in my palms when touching the shoulders of my tulpa. These weren't great feelings, it was like they were barely there, but they were still there. Also, following JX's advice, I tried to just "drop in head first" later that night. I nearly puked from the feeling/slight taste of sand in my throat, which was cool and horrible at the same time.

 

Third day: I can't remember much about yesterday, oddly enough. I'll update this when I can, but I can't remember much at all about it.

 

Fourth day: There was one new development today, and it nearly scared me shitless. I was trying some forcing, I had my tulpa sit in a chair (puppeting somewhat, be she just kind of teleported into it, so I don't think it was that bad). I made a chair beside the one she sat in and talked to her a bit. I told her about the world, why it was so important, the history of its origin and such. I told her about the people in the IRC again, I expressed some hopes for the future. It should be noted, I never could work out a face or hairstyle/color for her. While I was talking to her, with her in a static position just kind of facing me with a face I could not focus on, something happened that I don't think I could possibly forget if I tried. Right in front of me, she just disappeared. Vanished. All I could see was the chair she was sitting in. I freaked out, tried hard to force her back, and she did come back. This time, though, she had short, light blue hair and seemed to be sleeping. With that in mind, I did some work on seeing her breathing, which wasn't that hard, and then made a bed to lay her in and let her sleep. I don't know how long she'll be in that sleeping position, but I need to get back to forcing to find out.

 

 

So far that's it, I'll edit this post with more from tonight when I get to it.

[Nananya]

Instead of editing it, I think I'll just make another post. Quick reply is great like that.

 

Something amazing happened tonight.

 

Throughout the day, I haven't narrated much. I've tried, but I keep forgetting. Silette's not been out of my thoughts, as she's been a major point in everything I've said today for the most part, but I haven't been talking to her as much as I know I should. So, when I first went into the wonderland, laying in that bed, I looked at her. I put my hand on her shoulder, and nearly NOPEd myself directly out of the wonderland when I immediately got a screamer popping face image forced into my brain. Now, as she's made no movements (for the most part) on her own, I assumed this was the effect of listening to Theta tone for two hours prior. It should be noted, though, that she was sleeping on her side, instead of how she was on her back when I left her. But yeah, I did end up going out and calming down a bit, as a screamer stuck in your head is a terrifying thing, and went back in. It was then that I noticed that she was wearing a different color shirt and, upon further inspection after standing her up, she was also wearing short jean shorts. Now, as that posed a slight problem, I did change those to pants. When I looked up from doing that, I noticed she was standing in a different position than the straight arms to the side stance I'd left her in. She now had her left arm bent, her right elbow resting in her left hand and her chin rested on her right hand. It was unnatural, but I wasn't able to change it, so I assume she did it herself.

 

So, talking to her and such, I tried to figure out what we could do together, and decided on checking out the mountain range that I think I mentioned earlier. After a bunch of trouble trying to figure out how to get there, we eventually ended up there. I was getting a feel of the stone when I heard, in a voice that was clearly not mine, "Pay attention to me!"

 

After freaking, teleporting back to the building and talking a bit more, I decided to jump out of the wonderland to tell others of this great moment. Then I couldn't get back in it very easily, so I'm trying to narrate to her. I think I haven't done enough narrating yet, though, because I had this weird feeling of being cold and hot at the same time a few minutes ago, and it made no sense given my area.

[Nananya]

: Okay

: so

: I've mentioned several times that my only access to the wonderland is by applying natural laws to things

: That is, quite literally, the only way I can get myself in. That's important.

: So I went in, and talked a bit to Sanya

: of course, she didn't reply, but I'm pretty sure I saw her lips moving.

: Anyway, I asked her to "surprise me"

: of course, doing this, I would need to go away so that she could do something while I wasn't looking

: that's the best surprise time, you know?

+++ GlaD0S has given voice to Rhyme[DeSu]

: So I made something of a black box

: but while making that, I got a flash of a blue sky with "I love you!!" in huge fucking letters just plastered into empty space

: I wrote this off as me putting things there, though, and continued on

: daww~

: because I'm always telling Sanya "I love you (in a completely platonic way)

: "

: But yeah, I went into my box, which apparently sent me back to a daydream I had in highschool

: good stuff

: but I decided, after about a minute, to leave the box

+++ GlaD0S has given voice to FSnowman

: it should be noted, all of the things we do are based in this warehouse that I've set as my base of operations

*** Eonart is now known as Eonart_afk

: I stepped out of the box and onto a little grassy clif- ;_; Eonart left -cliff. In front of me was just a vast blue sky filled with clouds

: so I looked down to get a feel of my surroundings and saw nothing but, aside from my little cliff, vast blue sky filled with clouds

: of course, the moment I saw this, my mind processed that this was not logical, and began filling it with a ground below me

: which was when I realized that this wasn't something conjured up by my own thought process.

: So I turned around and saw Sanya in this white dress, unlike anything she's worn previously

+++ GlaD0S has given voice to [Dusk]

: I said some things, we jumped, somehow ended up back in the base

: then she kissed my cheek and ran off.

[Nananya]

A couple of days ago, something pretty cool happened. I asked Sanya when she was born, and the most prominent answer was "November 29"

 

after checking this post, I saw that I'd only begun actively working on her on December 4th, but something kept nagging at me about it all. I checked into it the next day and found out that the day I'd learned about tulpas/decided to make one was the 29th of November.