My Past, My Present, My future (New user hello)

[mvonneumann]

Right so for starters I believe I have been creating wonderlands at least for 6 maybe 7 years now, without knowing what they actually are. It was just a means of escape for me during long walks or bike rides. Sure their would be other characters in these wonderlands as well, usually based on what ever fiction I was into at the time, and we would go on overtly dramatic adventures.

A common theme for these would always be power and music.

However everything was always kept in the wonderland, never outside of it, and that changed sort of recently.

Semi-sob story time, something happened about a year and a half ago that left me shaken... really shaken. So much so that I still feel the effects today. About 6 months later Tulpa time really started happening.

 

Ok so yea also around this time I found MLP and wasnt that impressed to be honest. However I enjoyed the people in a chat room for the show so I hung out a bit and got exposed to that fandoms culture. On one night everyone was being mean to the character Scootaloo (apperently an orphan), this struck a chord with me something chronic and I thought I would adopt her in my dreamworld. A week later she was completely out of my dreamworld and interacting with me pretty much everywhere. (I blame years of practice for being able to do this that quickly). Anyways yea, she was great for me and I for her, I loved her like a daughter.

 

Sadly though as I got worse with my own symptoms of depression and PTSD, I began to feel I was unable to do my job as a father and after a tearful goodbye, I sent her to live with others in her dream world. I vowed I would take her back when I got better.... however we will have more on this later. Regardless I was gutted but I knew I had to spend far more focus on my own recovery.

 

 

Ok now during this time as well I became engrossed in the MLP fandom, you cant live with a pony and not. During this coarse of this I made an OC, Pegasus, Stallion, based on the Green Bay Packers (Go Pack Go).

However after making it, another voice in my head, one that has been with me since the start, started making changes to the design. He changed to a she, coat changed color, the voice even decided to take my old high school band (formed shock and awe about 6 years ago) as a name.

 

Meet Formal Riot.

 

Pretty much she has been around since the start in various shapes and forms but she finally saw something she liked and worked with it to make it her own. Since then she has acted as sort of a big sister mentor for me, which is odd as Im older but still, we get along fantastically. Then November happened, cue PTSD breakdown and house switch, losing two jobs, just everything bad. I was lonely and she moved in with me, again brother and sister (we share a bed because theres no where else).

 

Really that's where we are at now, she is devoting her time into helping me recover which is amazing (I think its because she has nothing better to do). So in the future, well i don't know but I can only imagine good things.

 

 

"Formals Words- Well Not sure what more their is to say, that hasnt been said already. Ill ad more later when Im not under constant watch, we had an accident"

[mvonneumann]

"Ok so Im not sure why Im doing this but whatever.

 

My form is that of a pegasus pony, light light grey coat, green and yellow mane and tail, and red eyes. I have a bit of a limp when walking so dont expect me to run or anything.

 

Interests are really reading, flying. Yea Im not very good at this whole thing sorry. Its strange though as I was the one who pushed the use of this site. Never thought it would be pushed back to me.

 

So yes pretty simple and short sorry."