Cyleleghorn's Tulpa Creation Progress

[cyleleghorn]

So I first came across the creepypasta tulpa story on reddit about one week ago, and I thought to myself, "I feel like this could actually happen (creating the tulpa and having a door to your subconscious) and if it could, I want to do it." For some reason, I didn't look it up untill 2 days later, and that's when I found this site and began working on my own tulpa.

 

MOTIVES

My motivation for creating a tulpa is mostly for science. The concept of having access to the power that your subconscious holds just blows my mind. The fact that this access comes in the form of a sentient, sapient being who lives inside your head is even better. I have heard the saying, "Humans only use 10% of our brains." I feel like those who have created tulpas can access at least part of the other 90% through the tulpa, and that is an accomplishment. I also want a friend. I am going to college in florida (i'm from virginia) to learn aerospace engineering in two months, and while I will make new friends there who will surely be smarter than the people I have been surrounded by previously, I just don't know how well I will get along with them. I will enjoy being able to relate with someone, being able to talk with them about anything, being able to get second opinions on personal matters, and all the rest of those general reasons that everybody else states. I also hope that she will be able to help me figure out how things work, and that she will have an interest in engineering like myself.

 

PROGRESS

My tulpa's name is Naomi, and she is a human female. I am a human male. On the first 2 days, I worked on visualizing. As good as I can recall scenes in my head that I have experienced, I had difficulty making something from scratch. Because of this, I didn't create my wonderland from scratch, I used the mountainside home mod from skyrim. I don't play skyrim anymore, but when I tried thinking of any place that I would like to make my wonderland in, that location stood out.

The first day I was having difficulty, and by the end of the day I could barely see the tulpa in the wonderland.

By the second day, I was able to visualize much better, and started on traits.

On the third day, when I woke up and said hello to Naomi, she was even clearer than before, and I felt a pressure in my head. I felt like I was flexing the visualization muscle, and I makes me feel like I am actually making progress. I reinforced the traits today, by making them into orbs and pushing them into Naomi's body. Some of them went in with no response, but when some of the other traits went in I felt a rush of emotion once they were fully absorbed, which made me happy.

On the fourth, fifth, and sixth days, I just narrated and worked on forcing. In the beginning, if I wanted Naomi to go somewhere, I would lead her by the hand. Yesterday however, When I talked about going outside, I said "Let's go!" and before I could take her hand she walked to the door. Up until this point I have had no problems with puppeting/parroting, so I think she has just gotten used to walking places enough that now she can do it on her own. Once outside, I made two snowballs and gave one to her. I told her that when it snows, people make these an throw them at each other. I threw mine off the edge of the mountain, and told her to throw hers, so she did. At me. And giggled. I guess I should have seen that one coming since I said "we throw them at people" and I was the only other person around lol.

 

Both of those experiences made me happy, and I feel like progress is being made, because now Naomi is animated and seems to have at least a limited capacity for emotions, instead of just being a statue that I'm trying to visualize in my head.

 

CONCLUSION

I'm going to wrap up this first post here. I feel like I'm making progress, and I will continue to post updates every few days, or as new developments are made. Whichever comes first. Post your thoughts, ideas, and suggestions below, and I will be sure to take them into account.

 

Do you think I am doing good so far? I am trying to keep any thoughts of actions from getting from me to Naomi, to reduce puppeting, which is why when she walked to the door on her own and threw the snowball, it makes me believe that those actions came from her. I don't believe in the other posts where people are talking about having full blown swordfights with tulpae who are mere days old, or playing tactical games very early on and having the tulpa pick by any means other than complete randomness. I just feel like that is too much to be happening this early on, but then again, maybe so is her walking around for me. I'll keep at it, and I want to be able to play rock paper scissors sometime soon. When I try now, i find it very hard to not send over impulses and make her moves for her. I feel like I am sending these impulses because right before she makes the symbol with her hand, I have a flash of an idea of what it will be. Is it normal to be able to read your tulpa's mind, or do you think I am just beaming over the move I want her to make without meaning to? When I really try to block out all of my thoughts, she doesn't participate in the game at all, in fact she just stands still. This may be because she doesn't comprehend the game on her own, or it may be because I am trying too hard to block out thoughts, and end up cutting her off from whatever sentience she is forming it this stage. What do you all think?